Chapter Text
☀
"Would you die for me?" Drew asked, the words mumbled against Will's lips.
Will smiled and pulled back. "Of course," he promised. "I would." He said the words so confidently, as if he knew the answer before the question had been formed.
Drew smiled and kissed him once more. Will returned both the smile and kiss.
He loved his girlfriend. He would die for her. He would slit his wrists and paint the walls red.
They pulled away, but Drew's fingers tightened around his possesively. Her nails dug sharp little crescents into the back of his hand.
He didn't mind. Not even when she drew blood.
She hadn't apologized. She simply removed her nails from his hand and stared as red dripped down his hand. He healed it in quickly with his powers, then apologized.
Drew gave him a passive-aggressive little smile and patted his elbows. She stole another demanding kiss and then trotted away.
Nico, standing nearby, gaped at the scene.
"She just- oh, hell no. I'm going over there," he grumbled.
Will was staring at his post-injured hand when Nico walked up to the bench.
The blonde looked up. His eyes dazzled Nico's for a moment.
"Oh, hey, Death Boy."
"What the fuck was that?"
"Wh-"
"You're just gonna let her walk all over you?"
"She just-"
"That's not healthy, Will."
Nico grabbed Will's wrist, thumb brushing over the half-healed nail-marks. His hand was cold.
Will couldn't help but press slightly into the touch.
"She made you bleed, William!"
Will flinched at the full name. "It's okay, Nico. You're making a scene."
Nico heard the way Will's voice wavered, saw the fear in his eyes, and let go of his wrist.
"You're right. I... I shouldn't have yelled."
And he drifted into shadow.
☀
"You let that creepy Hades kid touch you? I'm the only one allowed to touch you!" Drew screamed. She slapped Will's cheek hard enough to bruise, then pulled him into a heated, demanding kiss that he wasn't sure he wanted.
He gasped when he managed to get away.
She scoffed. "You don't love me enough! You don't even wanna kiss me!"
She punched him over his eye. He yelped.
She grabbed him by the hair and punched his face. His lip split, and blood dripped down his face.
"Pathetic!" she scolded. "Can't handle a hit from a girl."
"Please-"
She kicked him to the ground, grinning cruelly. "Now when did I give you permission to talk?"
"I-"
She kicked him again, foot catching the spot right in front of his ribs. He fought back the urge to vomit.
He backed away, back hitting a tree. They'd gone on a walk in the forest, and Will had briefly mentioned Nico's outburst.
Drew looked down at him, trembling and terrified at her feet from her doing.
Her resolve cracked, just a bit.
"Would you die for me?" she asked.
A tear slipped from Will's eye.
"Yes," he whispered without hesitation, "I would."
Drew stared down at him, almost as if evaluating.
But Will still would die for her. He would slit his wrists and paint the walls red for her, still, because he believed love could be violent. Was supposed to be violent.
He didn't understand the fine line between love and desire. He had never been taught — he didn't have a father figure in his life, and his mom didn't date anyone after Apollo.
How was he meant to have learned?
"Please..." he croaked out.
"Get up, then," Drew spat.
"I-"
"Nobody is coming to help you. Get up."
Will's arms trembled, then gave out. He cried out weakly.
"Get up, Will!"
Will looked up. Blood dripped from his lip onto the ground.
Drew scoffed and turned away.
•••
A few hours later, Nico found Will. The son of Apollo was pale, feverish, and bruised and bloody.
"Hey," Nico said softly, crouching in front of the shaking boy, who flinched. "Will? I'm gonna bring you to the infirmary."
Nico's voice was so gentle that Will started crying.
"Can I pick you up?" Nico asked
Will nodded, so Nico slipped an arm under his knees and one behind his shoulders.
Will leaned into the touch. Gods, when was the last time someone had touched him gently?
He rested his head on Nico's shoulder, sobbing quietly.
Nico's heart ached. He had always liked Will, always had admired him, but this was different.
This was Will without walls.
Will gripped Nico's sleeves as they made their way to the infirmary.
When Drew saw what was happening from a few yards away, she gasped in fake shock for the sake of the friends around her.
"Will? Oh, gods, I think I might pass out. I need some cool air," she gasped, sprinting inside.
Will couldn't find the energy to care. Nico wanted to rip her throat out, but he couldn't. A), he couldn't be sure she had done this to Will and B), he was holding Will, so he would have to put him down, and he didn't want to do that.
A healer took Will from Nico.
☀
A few hours later, after half of the story had gotten out and Nico seemed like the bad guy, Drew came in the room.
Will was sitting upright on the bed, staring off into space.
Drew smiled passive-aggressively.
"You just had to go and make a scene, huh? Can't hide yourself? Your bruised, weak, pathetic self? Disgusting. Come on, Will, we're leaving. We're gonna go talk about this."
Will didn't move.
"Will! I said to come on!"
Will was dazed with fear and the ringing in his ears.
Drew slapped his cheek. "Are you deaf? Come on!"
Will let out a whimper but didn't move. Drew raised her voice, leaning closer to Will's face.
"Come ON!"
She grabbed his wrist and pulled him off the cot.
He cried out, legs trembling, and collapsed.
Drew scoffed and stepped back, allowing him to fall. He caught himself weakly on all fours.
He stood and scampered back onto the cot, trembling.
"I can't- I'm so sorry, Drew. I'm really sorry, I'm sorry, please don't hit me again, I'm sorry, sorry sorrysorry—"
"Would you die for me?" Drew interupted.
"Yes," Will whispered, looking up at her through tear-clumped golden lashes. "I would. Without hesitation."
And maybe he still would. Maybe he would leave himself bleeding at her feet, just skin and bone. Maybe he still would slit his wrists and paint the walls red for her.
He looked down at his bruised, shaking legs dangling off the edge of the cot.
"I don't believe you," Drew said.
Will looked down, then looked up with resolve in his eyes.
"You keep asking me if I would die for you," he said quietly, "but I think I already have."
Drew scoffed and slapped him again.
But Nico was in the doorway this time.
And he was furious.
He didn't say anything — just walked over and grabbed her wrist. She shuddered, but she couldn't get away.
Pop!
Nico's hand landed hard on Drew's cheek.
"How do you like it, huh?"
Drew started crying dramatically.
Nico laughed and kicked her in the stomach. She fell and hit her head, hard, on a supply caddy. Nico's grin widened and he kicked her under her chin.
"Stop," Will whispered. "Nico, stop!"
Nico looked over his shoulder at Will.
"Stop hitting her."
Nico hesitated, but backed up and let her stand.
"Freak!" she shouted. "Come on, Will!"
Will started climbing off the cot.
"Do you want to go, Will?" Nico asked.
Will looked up at him and gave a small shake of his head.
"Yeah, that's what I thought. Fuck off, Drew."
Drew scoffed. "This is outrageous. We're over, Will!" She stormed out.
Nico turned to Will, his expression suddenly tender. Will flinched.
"I'm sorry," Nico whispered. "I just... She had no right to hit you. I got mad. I ruined your relationship- well, ha, I'm not sorry for that. Anyways. You can hate me now."
He stepped into the shadows, leaving a lone Will.
The healer in the corner that had seen the whole thing burst out laughing
☀
Will didn't see Nico for two months.
He stopped eating much around week two. Gods, what was wrong with him? Nico was just a friend, Drew—
But was Nico just a friend to Will?
Nico, who'd protected him.
Nico, who'd warned him.
Nico, with black locks of hair and deep brown doe eyes.
Nico, with ivory skin and a soft but firm voice.
Nico, who was gorgeous and took Will's breath away.
Nico, who was dangerous in the beautiful way.
Nico, who had left because he'd scared Will.
Or was that why he left? Maybe he left because he thought Will got the wrong message. Maybe he thought Will was mad at him. Maybe he thought he had to run.
Currently, Will was sitting at the Apollo table while conversations swirled around him. It was dinner time, but he hadn't eaten since lunch yesterday. He hadn't slept in two days — he knew it was bad for him, knew he kept having microsleeps, knew he kept collapsing and yet still not passing out — but he couldn't find the energy to sleep. Someone was trying to speak to him, but his mind was a whirl of thoughts he was no longer able to control.
He stood and walked off, leaving behind his half-siblings and the untouched plate of food.
He needed to think. To breath. He needed somewhere to be alone.
He headed for the clearing that was hidden by trees. Nobody would find him there, right?
☀
Will stared at the little pocket knife in his hands.
He looked down at his arms.
He wondered if, perhaps, he should slit his wrists and paint the walls red. Not for Drew this time.
For himself.
Did he want to be here anymore?
Will looked at his shaking hands. What was there to live for? He knew that was a bit forward, but he didn't care.
"I'm tired of this place," he whispered, flipping open the pocket knife.
The blade came down on his forearm. He didn't cut his wrist, not yet. He wanted to feel the pain first.
Will watched the crimson blood drip down his arm with almost curious eyes.
Another cut. Will listed them as he cut deeper — stratum corneum, stratum lucidum, stratum granulosum, stratum spinosum, stratum basale, dermis, hypodermis.
Will smeared the blood over his arm with his nonbleeding hand. He deserved this, didn't he?
Will thought of Nico. Every time he did, a feeling he didn't know how to name bloomed in his chest. It was something like what he felt around Drew — or, what he used to feel around Drew — but stronger. Scarier.
And it was also something he could name. Desire was a bit strong of a word, and though it wasn't incorrect, Will didn't want to use it.
He settled on want.
It didn't matter either way, though. Nico didn't like him back, and Will would be gone soon.
Really soon.
Will poised the knife at his wrist, fingers trembling.
How long will it take, he wondered, for them to find my body out here?
Will hesitated.
Then—
"WILLIAM ANDREW SOLACE!"
Will yelped in surprise, the pocket knife slipping out of his grasp.
Shit.
"Nico! Where have you been?" he asked, trying to sound mad. Perhaps he could change the subject. "Do you know how worried I've been?"
"None of that. Are you stupid? What are you fucking doing? Give me your arm. Now, William," Nico snapped.
"It's just Will," Will murmured as he handed Nico his uninjured arm. "See? Fine. Now, where did you disappear t—"
Nico snatched Will's injured arm out from his back.
"Heal this. Right now."
Will shook his head. "I'm fine. I'm not wasting my powers, it makes me tired. Just like how your powers drain you."
"Now, Solace."
The anger in Nico's voice terrified him.
"Fine," Will mumbled. He swept his fingers over the cuts, closing them.
"Good. Now, we're going to the infirmary."
"What?! Why?"
"Because you clearly have a head injury, or something."
Will snorted despite himself.
"You think this is funny? You're such a dumbass, Will! You know how much you'd be missed if you killed yourself? You're our head medic, and I love you, and you still have to yell at Drew, and—"
"You love me?"
Nico froze.
"You're delusional. I never said that," he said finally.
Will hesitated, but decided not to push. Besides, his brain was a bit foggy. Perhaps it was the blood loss, though he wasn't sure how long
There was a cold hand at his wrist, and he was pulled up from the grass.
The pocket knife lay bloodstained in the grass, abandoned.
☀
The healer in the infirmary was one of Will's younger half-sisters, Dahlia, and she was furious at him.
"What were you thinking, Will? Why didn't you talk to us? You have a whole cabin of siblings!"
Will flinched at her tone, shaking. His pale blue eyes were enormous and more of a watery color, and there were unfallen tears in them. He just stared at her, silent.
"Can't you see he's terrified? Lay off of him!" Nico snapped at Dahlia.
Dahlia gave him a nasty look. "Didn't I tell you to wait outside, Nico?"
Nico gave a humorless little laugh. "I'm not leaving him."
"I'll sedate you."
"Try me."
Dahlia sighed and grabbed Nico gently by the shoulders, pushing him out of the room.
"Wait," Will spoke up, voice hoarse. "I don't want him to leave. Please, don't... don't make him leave..."
Nico broke free from Dahlia's grip, teeth bared at her. "I'm not leaving him," he repeated.
Nico climbed onto the cot beside Will. "It's okay. I'm not leaving."
Will stared at him, eyes wide.
Then he leaned over and rested his head on Nico's shoulder.
Nico froze. He'd never liked physical contact, but this was different — this was a terrified, trembling Will, trusting him and only him.
Will's shoulders shook with sobs, though no tears fell.
Nico rested his cheek on Will's curls. "Shhh... you're okay. I've got you."
"I love you. I'm sorry."
☀
It was three months later. The leaves had started falling and the air had shifted.
Nico's head lay in Will's lap. He gazed up at his newly(ish) official boyfriend.
"Whatcha lookin' at, darlin'~?" Will asked.
They were sitting under a tree they'd claimed as theirs a few weeks ago. Nico's hand was on Will's cheek, and Will drank up the touch.
"The prettiest boy in the world," Nico replied smoothly.
"That's not true — you can't very well be lookin' at yourself."
Nico grinned. "Shut up," he chuckled, swatting playfully at Will's face. Will caught his wrist and kissed the back of his hand.
Nico flushed. "I hate you," he murmured, though both of them knew it was a lie.
"Ah, no you don't. You'd die for me."
Nico smiled softly.
"I'd paint the walls red.
And somewhere beyond the tree, a small, now rusted pocket knife lay abandoned in a field.