Chapter Text
Let the stars all stop their singing
So the sea can start its mourning
And the mountain break the silence behind the sky
Oh, we who have been lead astray
Who no longer know our way
Can the sea be singing, for us, our "goodbye?"
-From "Hymn of Lost Voyagers", an ancient Eridian ballad
Anacrusis
“And now we are on to… Electromagnetic Waves!”
This sixth presentation in a long day of presentations seemed to be the breaking point of their attention. The thirty-six pebbles crowded inside the small classroom dissolved into impatient clicks. Undeterred, the teachers lifted her claws to reel back their focus. On the single, battered projector, some raised lines bubbled into being and started to undulate, like waves.
Grounding-Rock was one of the few pebbles whose carapaces still angled forward towards the screen. He pivoted back and forth, ever so slightly, wanting to be nearer to those fascinating lines and textures. Those little sweeps and curves he was so attracted by eventually took the shape of symbols, measuring out a long list of equations. The class shifted, their restlessness groaning and palpable in the warm air.
“Who can tell me how we perceive objects around us?” The teacher asked.
“Sound, Teacher!” Grounding-Rock broke into a high-pitched hum, too excited to contain himself. “We can sense everything around us because of sound.”
The click-whirr-gurgle of the class grew louder than ever, as the pebbles around him grew ever more unruly. Right beside him, Endless-Ocean was nodding xir carapace from left to right; a clear sign of impatience.
“Correct!” the teacher said. “But sound, however, is just so many vibrations- called “sound-waves”- that require a medium to travel through. More often than not, that medium is air. We are able to sense sound, and thus perceive information regarding objects around us.
“Scientists, however-“, the teacher snapped three of her claws, loud and hard, to grab the class’ attention. The noise, which had evolved into sibilant hissing, died down.
“Scientists have proved that several different wave-forms exist, most of which you will learn about in subsequent educational levels. Sound is thus just a wave-form formed by a vibration. Many other types of energies mimic such waves without needing mediums- in other words, similar to how a sound ‘wave’ compresses and expands, magnetic and electric waves can also compress and expand. You have already learnt about atoms, particles and electric charges. An electromagnetic wave is produced when an electrically charged particle undergoes acceleration. This creates a chain reaction, and causes different types of compressions in both electric and magnetic fields, leading to an electromagnetic wave. Unlike sound waves, we cannot sense these easily. Most importantly, these can move through nothing at all.”
“Boooo-ooo-ooring.” Striking-Bolt let out a hiss, fidgeting from xir seat in the very back. “If we could sense it, I would know, and since we can’t, I don’t care!”
“And most people were of the same mind as you for many hexenniums, Striking-Bolt- but thankfully for science, enough of us persisted in tracing these waves. And thus we have discovered that electromagnetic waves can oscillate through space at exceedingly high speed… approximately a dozen cubexdigons the speed of sound in our atmosphere.”
A collective whistle of surprise and awe broke through the classroom, as most of the pebbles immediately stopped their fidgeting to pay the teacher their full attention. The teacher tilted her carapace to the side, obviously pleased.
“But, teacher-“a pebble Grounding-Rock did not know tapped the ground twice- “something that travels so fast must require energy. Can we not harness that energy?”
“You must understand, sound is a form of mechanical vibration. Electromagnetic waves are not mechanical, they are not passed through substances. The study of these waves belong to a class of scholars far higher than your own. But yes- these waves do produce energy. However, it would take a very special type of organism to harness that energy. Our technology is nowhere near that level.”
Nearly the entire hexad of pebbles which formed the class let out disappointed noises. Grounding-Rock, in particular, lowered himself to the ground in obvious discontent.
“Quiet, quiet! I have sounded but a drop of water, and you are all bent on constructing hydrothermal vents!” The teacher let out an amused trill.
“There are many, many things we can do with these electromagnetic waves, if not harness them for their energy. For example, we discovered less than a hexatride ago that that our own sun, the star for which our planet is formed and which forms the source of all Life, emits these waves. And not only our star, but each and every one in the whole universe! And with the length of the specific wavelength emitted, we can calculate the distance and temperature of each and every star and planet in the universe.”
Grounding-Rock raised himself from the ground again, tittering with excitement. For the barest of moments, he imagined himself traveling among stars, measuring them, mapping them out as their ancestors mapped the continents. What strange creatures could be lurking in the silences behind these stars- what absurd, wonderful and dangerous things. He wanted to sense them all. He wanted to touch them, to speak with them, to sing their languages. He wanted--
Beside him, Endless-Ocean was swaying left to right again. “This lecture should have ended at V.” Endless-Ocean muttered, nudging Grounding-Rock with xir carapace. Grounding-Rock felt a small stream of heat rush down to his claws, but he ignored it in favour of Endless-Ocean’s words.
“What, don’t you think it is thrilling?” He asked. “Don’t you want to know what lies beyond our planet, beyond the reach of sound- beyond our sun’s gravity, if possible?”
“I never sought to hear that far.” Endless-Ocean said. “I have always been more focused on what lies immediately around us… on our own planet, on our own rocks and waters and creatures. What difference does it make to me, what happens in stars so far away?”
Grounding-Rock still felt the heat curling in his claws. He prayed Endless-Ocean wouldn’t notice. “For someone whose name refers to endless, unsoundable distances and depths, you are remarkably down-to-earth.” His voice was nonchalant. Two of his standing-claws were tapping the ground, frantic. Try as he might, he couldn’t hold them still.
Endless-Ocean tilted xir carapace to the right. Xe sounded more bemused than irritated, though Grounding-Rock had learnt better than to trust what was just audible on the surface.
“And your name refers to the stone which anchors the soil, holding it steady, letting things grow and learn upon it. It’s quite strange, no? How our names do not seem to reflect the actuality of our desires? Or perhaps…” Endless-Ocean lowered xir voice even more, causing a small shiver to run down Grounding-Rock’s carapace. “Perhaps, as it is sounded in stories, our names are waiting for the one to balance and complete them. Perhaps both of our names would do better combined.”
Grounding-Rock felt what was left of his composure stutter away. Endless-Ocean was close enough to be brushing against him now. The frantic rhythm of his claws swole to a blistering, nervous allegro. He was just about to answer, but the voice of the teacher saved him.
“You two over there- pay attention! This is a classroom, not a fairground!” The teacher sounded irate, and Endless-Ocean slid smoothly backwards, settling into a more societally acceptable distance. The stream of heat pulled backwards from Grounding-Rock’s claws. Like a constricting sound-wave, he thought.
“Teacher!” Striking-Bolt, who had before been utterly uninterested, now seemed enraptured. “Teacher, if these electromagnetic waves compress and expand exactly like sound waves, then couldn’t beings evolve to hear them like we do sound? If they can travel through anything, then can’t they travel to us- from anywhere in the world?”
“These waves eventually do travel to us, Striking-Bolt, even if our atmosphere ensures they don’t affect us. But once again, remember these waves are not sound-waves. Sound-waves cannot travel through vacuum, while these can. However… the first part of your question is extremely interesting. It is actually being investigated by the astronomical thrum as we speak.”
The teacher shifted forward, pushing her weight onto all five of her claws, her tone changing to reflect the importance of her words.
“It is theoretically possible that beings could evolve to sense these electromagnetic waves, and use them to perceive their environment just as we use sound. We can study these waves using technology. Life on our own planet hasn’t really evolved to do this biologically- however, parts of our brain do use a very similar mechanism to process information. We have as of now no evidence of other planets and alien life-forms, in fact, there is a lot of doubt regarding whether conditions required to evolve intelligence life exist on other planets. Even if they did, it is doubtful life-preserving atmospheres would allow electromagnetic waves from a star to cross them. We know of no organism on our planet that can process the electromagnetic waves from our sun, for they are nearly impossible to sense. We do have a term for this, however.”
All around Grounding-Rock, pebbles were shifting from claw-to-claw, tilting their carapaces towards the teacher’s podium. The teacher herself paused, letting the gravity of her words sink in.
Beside Grounding-Rock, Endless-Ocean scoffed. Nothing, according to xir, could be more preposterous than aliens hearing electromagnetic waves as if they were sound. Sound, one of those quintessential components, without which life would be meaningless and dull… what kind of eldritch, monstrous being, xe wondered, could not feel a song on their claw-tips? What ludicrous creature would trade sound to hear waves that travelled through nothing, touched nothing, affected nothing?
But Grounding-Rock was leaning forward, and the teacher herself seemed excited, enthralled by endless possibilities. Shifting from claw to claw, she leaned back to survey the class, contently listening to their obvious interest.
“Light.” The teacher said softly. “We call it “light”. It is a theoretical biophysics term. It is defined as electromagnetic waves from an external source, which can be sensed organically by a living being, without technological aid.
“And from all we know, light may not exist.”
Crescendo
It was a funny thing, Grounding-Rock thought, that the first time he rode upon the Space Elevator it had been Endless-Ocean who had persuaded him into it.
Endless-Ocean, who had all five legs firmly on the ground. Endless-Ocean, whose carapace had never been filled with that wanderlust that drove Grounding-Rock into doing such reckless, idiotic things. Endless-Ocean, whose name called to mind a depth beyond the sound-horizon, a humming, endless song and melody and crashing waves in water.
Endless-Ocean, who loved Grounding-Rock, but hadn’t told him yet.
And Grounding-Rock who loved-loved-loved xir back… but couldn’t admit it yet.
“Why would you want me to go up there? You hate space. You dedicated your life to the ecological thrum so you can understand our planet, and work for everything inside, never above it.”
Grounding-Rock’s voice had been wary, full of doubts.
Endless-Ocean had only shaken xir carapace in laughter. “I don’t hate space. I just prefer to keep my five legs on the ground, near to what really matters. But what really matters right now, Grounding-Rock, is happiness, and I am well aware that few things would make you happier than riding that damned metal box into outer space.”
Grounding-Rock could think of one thing- just one- that would make him happier than going to space, but he had dared not voice it. Not with the way Endless-Ocean made warm streams rush to his claws, not with the way Grounding-Rock could never be sure what ran through xir five hearts.
(Later, much, much later, he would regret that. He would regret every second he had spent dithering, every moment he had been away. 186.3 Earth years, he would one distant cycle learn, was not enough.)
In any case, he had been convinced, agreeing to the trip. Endless throngs of people had been clamouring for a ride that cycle, forming a formless cacophony of noise. Grounding-Rock, who had always been thrilled by chaos and clashing notes, was more excited than ever.
Endless-Ocean, however, sounded a little perturbed. “I had hoped for some more privacy.”
The word “privacy” had sent yet another rush of heat through Grounding-Rock, but he convinced himself it was not important. Hadn’t Endless-Ocean always hated noise and queues and commotion? Grounding-Rock saw how xe swayed with frustration, left to right, as they waited in line together. Endless-Ocean had bought both their tickets two cycles before.
Grounding-Rock listened to Endless-Ocean move and mutter and tap, so perfectly like yet distinct from the thronging masses, and forced himself to sense literally anything else.
Eventually, however they got onto the thing. The security sounded frazzled, but somehow Endless-Ocean had convinced them to let the two go up alone.
(Several cycles later, Grounding-Rock would realise that Endless-Ocean had been planning to propose, and regretted xe hadn’t gotten the chance)
“How long will it take before we get up there? Has it traction, hydraulic, or another mechanism entirely? What is the rate of energy consumption? What amount of kinetic friction-“ Grounding-Rock was scrambling from one end to another as fast as his claws would carry him, blurting out increasingly perplexing questions to anyone in audial range…. Well, perplexing to those who were not master engineers, at least.
Grounding-Rock worked with xenonite enough to know that this elevator was a crown jewel of both locomotion and materials science. He had never heard this particular combination before, and he interestedly tapped the elevator walls.
He was going to space. He was actually going to space. He was going to get out of this planet’s atmosphere, I+ kilometres up into sky, surrounded by possibility and star-stuff and oh gods, did light exist? Would he meet with beings who make it exist?
‘Obviously not’, the logical part of his carapace that sounded so much like Endless-Ocean whispered. They were not actually going anywhere that exhilarating or important. I+ kilometers from the surface was nothing at all in astronomical distances. And really, even if there was so much as a meteor nearby, the Space Thrum would have let them go.
But still… outer space. ♩♪♫♬ preserve him, he was actually going to outer space.
Now, the possibility of him ever meeting aliens in his lifetime, Grounding-Rock knew, was just about nil. In fact, the idea was so preposterous that he might as well think about being carried around in a ball by a being breathing pure oxygen instead of ammonia, whose carapace was all inside, traveling in a ship that faster than time itself!
Amazing to think of, cadenced to imagine, but it would never happen. Of this at least Grounding-Rock could be quite unfortunately sure.
“Remember, please, that we take no accountability for any catastrophe, injury or anxiety of any kind whatsoever that may result from this excursion. Any violation of safety protocols or damage to property will result in strict consequences ranging from fines to long-term imprisonment. First time passengers may feel exceedingly ill, disoriented or light-carapaced. This is a common reaction observed within the weaker folds of the magnetic field. In case this occurs, do not panic, and simply press the Emergency Button which will cause the elevator to return to the surface. We hope you remain alive to hear another cycle. Have a nice flight!”
Endless-Ocean let out a chatter of alarm at this pronouncement, but Grounding-Rock simply waved the tour personnel off. The deeply scarred Eridian who had been speaking shrugged, and simply gestured to some other officials. The doors shut with a deep, shuddering clang, and the Space Elevator groaned to life, like a sea-monster waking up.
Grounding-Rock started bouncing around wildly, as if he were a pebble on his first merry-go-round. Endless-Ocean let out an exasperated sigh, then settled down. Grounding-Rock could hear the amusement on xir features.
“Just hunker down and relax, Endless-Ocean. We will both be fine!” Grounding-Rock practically vibrated out. Endless-Ocean lifted xir claws in acquiescence. Deep in xir carapace, however, xe wondered if xe had been right to bribe the Guide into letting them go up alone…
-
Xe definitely had NOT been right. Endless-Ocean reached this unfortunate conclusion, quite some time later, when Grounding-Rock whimpered, teetered and collapsed in front of xir, right as the elevator left most of Erid’s magnetic field behind.
“You are safe, I am here, you are safe, I am here!” Endless-Ocean rushed forward, bumping xir carapace against the desolate Grounding-Rock. Xir beloved only let out a stuttered, heart wrenching noise, curling up all five legs against his carapace. He looked almost wounded.
Really, Endless-Ocean couldn’t blame him. Xe didn’t know what xe had expected, but space felt so DEAD, so empty. “Sound waves cannot travel in vacuum”, the voice of their old basic education teacher echoed inside Endless-Ocean’s carapace. Endless-Ocean felt as xe were drowning, and couldn’t even appreciate the irony- not when everything was so strangely, horrifyingly silent. The magnetic field was too weak here and xe felt numb, lost as xe had never been before. Xe couldn’t make sense of any direction, of anything at all really, and everything was wrong, wrong, wrong.
If xe didn’t have Grounding-Rock to anchor xir, Endless-Ocean thought, xe may well have keeled over xirself.
As it was… Grounding-Rock needed xir. He was xir ostinato in this chaotic clamouring song of life, and it struck at Endless-Ocean’s soul that xe had, however inadvertently, been the cause for such distress. Xe forced his claw forward, striking out deafly, somehow managing to hit the Emergency Button. The elevator shuddered, stopping dead, and Endless-Ocean felt xir five hearts launch upwards, beating a frantic pace all through xir body. Pressed against xir, half below xir, Grounding-Rock let out a weak groan.
Then the elevator began slowly whining and trembling its way downwards, a long-abused beast to the ring-master’s whistle.
Endless-Ocean knew xe was a fool- the greatest fool to ever scamper on Erid’s overburdened surface. Xe had been warned, warned multiple times, that basic biology ensured that a first ride on the space elevator provided nothing but discomfort and terror. Especially when they had both been alone, without the experienced Guides-- anything could have happened! But xe had insisted, xe had wanted it to be “oh-so-romantic” (♩♪♫♬curse xir!). Xe had forgotten, in xir arrogance, that for all his sublimities and perfections… Grounding-Rock was still mortal.
Endless-Ocean was mortal too, and similarly vulnerable, although xe had always known that. It had been a mistake to assume that xe could ignore it while traveling upwards.
Silently, the two Eridians clung to each other, as the elevator winced its way back home.
“You know, Endless-Ocean,” Grounding-Rock said suddenly, voice shaking but trying to be suave, “Despite my infinitely attractive daring and curiosity, I think for once I have had enough of space.”
Endless-Ocean shuddered, ever so slightly; the smallest of laughs. “Dull and prosaic as we both know I am, Grounding-Rock… did you ever imagine I would disagree with that?”
(Grounding-Rock had never imagined the he would be riding a deserted space elevator with Endless-Ocean, either. But he had learnt in his youth it was best to discard all assumptions when it came to Endless-Ocean, and would never forget the lesson.)
They were clinging to each other like newborn hatchlings, and Endless-Ocean thought, rueful, that there was nothing romantic in the disaster that was this flight. Their carapaces were pressed together, claws wrapping around each other’s arms, and residual shudders of fright and wrongness were still traveling through their bodies. They couldn’t make sense of what was up, down, or sideways… they could hardly hear anything but Grounding-Rock; the ridges of his carapace, the grooves on his claws… from endless cycles working on projects for the Engineering Thrum, Endless-Ocean knew.
There could be nothing romantic at all about this, not when they were both so shaky and frightened. Endless-Ocean had worthlessly endangered them and perhaps ruined whatever chance xe had of eventually bonding with Grounding-Rock. There was nothing meaningful about this flight unless it was proof Endless-Ocean was an unworthy, insensitive menace. Utterly dejected, Endless-Ocean let out a small moan of xir own and pressed even closer to Grounding-Rock.
(Incidentally, if Endless-Ocean had bothered to confess xir thoughts to Grounding-Rock, xe would have been met with the very opposite opinion. But Endless-Ocean didn’t confess, and Grounding-Rock had been too overwhelmed to ask what xe was thinking)
When half a dozen security personnel pried open the elevator shafts to discover them practically glued to each other, none of them said a word.
(carbon and oxygen, joined in a triple covalent bond)*
Like kelp untangling in the ocean waves, they slowly broke apart… And Grounding-Rock crouched, still and numb and unable to make a single sound, while Endless-Ocean scampered away from him.
He only hoped, despite how pathetic he had been, Endless-Ocean would still bother with him.
(“Says the shore to the ocean- ‘is it your song that I sing?’”)
Maestoso
The first time Endless-Ocean had implied they should bind their names together, they had both been pebbles, and it was wildly inappropriate.
The second time xe did it, it was not so much implication as declaration, with a lot of touch and sound and humming, and was still wildly inappropriate.
The third time… the third time, Grounding-Rock couldn’t even be sure of, for it was the first time Endless-Ocean had been about to watch him sleep, and he heard it leave his beloved’s carapace just before he drifted off. He might even have imagined it- he couldn’t be sure, he had lost consciousness too soon.
He only knew that he had heard Endless-Ocean’s voice, and he had been going to sleep (sleep, the most vulnerable time, the most helpless and healing time)-- he had been going to sleep, and Endless-Ocean’s voice (euphonious and rising) had seemed to be all around him.
And Grounding-Rock had felt safe-safe-safe…
He had felt watched over, as if nothing could possibly harm him, and that was when Grounding-Rock could admit he loved Endless-Ocean-- loved xir more than he loved sound, than he loved song, than he loved existense itself.
(It had been a long time before Grounding-Rock realised that Endless-Ocean loved him too, in the same way)
The fourth time… well, actually, the fourth time it had been Grounding-Rock who asked xir. He had sung it to xir in the old, formal way- the traditional way, to show he really meant it.
He had poured all he was, all he would be into that song. He had sung Endless-Ocean’s full name (had a more glorious name ever been born?), sung each and every chord of it, sung a note for each achievement and marker of Endless-Ocean’s life, sung for all the achievements to come and infused every sound with his love-love-love for Endless-Ocean…
Eridian names, which keep growing, which change and evolve and shift like waves as you travel through life and love and fulfilling adventures and Endless-Ocean-would-you-please-let-me-share-your-name-and-grow-our-lives-together? , his five vocal chords trembling and thundering as the words escaped, all in a rush.
And Endless-Ocean had-
Xe, had stared at him, silent, and Grounding-Rock-
Grounding-Rock had felt all five of his hearts plummet, and oh, what if he had been wrong, what if Endless-Ocean had never really meant it, what if xe no longer wanted him, now that xe had heard HIS name, too, laid bare in all its flaws and inconsistencies--
Endless-Ocean shook their carapace in laughter and it was all what took you so long and did you really think I would refuse and yes, you dolt, I love you, I love you as the sea loves the shore and sky…
And Grounding-Rock had never felt such joy.
But then he teetered, weakly, on his five legs, and Endless-Ocean rushed forwards because how long has it been since you last slept and have you been practicing that song all this time, practicing it just for me?
Yes, well, OF COURSE Grounding-Rock had been practicing the song. Of course he had pushed himself to avoid sleep, avoid everything until he had it perfectly and then still more, for how could he do otherwise? How could he do otherwise, when doing otherwise might mean he could make a mistake, could make a mistake while singing his beloved’s name and of his love for xir?
“You ridiculous thing.” Endless-Ocean said, having dragged him inside xir home and into xir own private chambers. “You ridiculous thing.” Endless-Ocean sounded, again, and Grounding-Rock could not even protest that his being here was inappropriate; they were going to be bonded, they would actually be bonded, they would be together till eternity itself lost its voice.
“Sleep. I will watch” said Endless-Ocean and Grounding-Rock--
Grounding-Rock was a newborn star, growing and emerging and exploding outwards, exploding outwards into the silence of space and filling it with endless song and rush and life.
“Sleep, I will watch,” said Endless-Ocean, again.
“You will not leave?” Grounding-Rock asked, despite the question being silly. None but the rudest, most ill-mannered scamp would leave while one they had promised to watch still slept.
But then again, that wasn’t what Grounding-Rock was really asking, was it?
Endless-Ocean seemed to understand, for xe tilted xir carapace in acceptance.
“Of course I will. The sea never flies up and leaves, does it? It is always here to welcome you back. The waves do not decide to fall upon a different shore. I will stay till you wake, Grounding-Rock, and then I will stay some more, for I love you.”
Xe would, wouldn’t they? Xe actually would, Grounding-Rock would spend his life watched over by xir as he slept. He would spend his life holding xir, walking beside xir, coming home to xir. He would always be safe, surrounded by his beloved’s voice. He would never be alone. He would never be apart from his to-be-bonded, his future mate. He was loved. He would always be loved, till the end of all that was true and just. He would always be watched over, till time itself lost all value and bended into knots.
“Sleep, you dolt.” Endless-Ocean said, laughter in xir voice. “Before I knock you unconscious.”
And Grounding-Rock-
Grounding-Rock slept, utterly tranquil.
He was watched over. He was with Endless-Ocean, and everything sounded new and fresh and hopeful. The world had never been a more rhythmic place.
He wouldn’t be alone, he thought. Never, in his life, would he have to sleep unwatched… he would never sleep far away and lost in endless silence, far away from home.
He wouldn’t be alone.
Tacet
(they say the fault lies in us and not in our stars)
(and yet it was the star that dimmed, wasn’t it?)
Fate, indeed, is a cruel mistress.
(Hello? Anyone… is anyone left? Please, if you are listening, answer me. I am alone and scared.)
(Why me? Please, no, I have to find a way… I don’t know how to find a way. I, I wasn’t meant to! I never prepared to do this alone!)
(I can’t… I can’t do this alone. But… They will die if I don’t, they all will… my mate will die. I can’t, I can’t fail my mate, I must find the answer! Let it all be damned, I will not fail my mate, I will not fail my planet, I will return, return with the solution! I will return home.)
(Everything is silent. It hurts.)
(I am… I am alone.)
(I am hearing noises. It’s been so long. I can hardly sleep, I stumble while awake… nothing seems to work, I cannot find the answer, I feel unsafe, please, I am all alone)
(Nothing and no one exists between me and my home… nothing and no one will come for me.)
(It’s been… it’s been so long…)
Vℓℓℓℓ+V̶λV̶V̶V̶V̶, Vℓℓℓℓ+V̶+ℓℓℓℓ, Vℓℓℓℓ+V̶+ℓℓℓI, Vℓℓℓℓ+V̶+ℓℓℓV, Vℓℓℓℓ+V̶+ℓℓℓλ, Vℓℓℓℓ+V̶+ℓℓℓ+, Vℓℓ-…**