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“You had better finally use the Calming Concoction,” Leonida said from above him with a frown. “I'm telling you that as a mediwitch and as your friend. But if you make me, I will order it as your boss! I need you to be conscious here!”
Severus was sitting on the floor of St. Mungo's pharmacy backroom, shaking after one of his increasingly frequent panic attacks.
Yet, he still managed to scowl. “I'm definitely not interested in experiencing severe delusions, thank you very much!” he rasped.
Leonida hunkered down so that their faces were at the same level.
“Severus,” she started caringly, “they are not delusions. They are the pieces of the past. Of what makes the patient sick. Flushing them out is a part of the healing. And you definitely have things to heal from.” She paused. Then she smiled a little. “Some of them can even be promises for the future. Something you can have when you make yourself healthy again. Like happy little prophecies.”
Severus snorted. “Prophecies of all kinds are absolute bullshit!” he spat. “They only work if batshit-crazy lunatics believe in them and make them come true!”
Leonida shrugged and helped him stand up. “As you wish. Here's your Concoction,” she said strictly, handing him a small potion bottle. “Don't return to work before using it.”
***
Severus was at home alone, the flat still and quiet. It was evening, deep darkness behind the windows telling everyone that it was time to go to bed.
He was holding the small potion bottle, staring at its simple curves. He was not sure whether he wanted to face whatever it might bring to the surface.
During his life, he went through a lot.
All the fear and pain. The loneliness. The bitterness and cold. Refusals and outrages, the disgust in people's eyes. Lies he had to tell and truths he had to hear… It could be anything.
Let's stop overthinking! I'm not a goddamn child, am I?!
He angrily uncorked the bottle and drank the potion in a single gulp.
***
Darkness all around. A hard, cold wall behind his back. Severus felt a little bit confused. Where am I?
Suddenly, a soft body, so pleasantly warm, muscled and powerful, pressed his whole being against the wall.
Oh wow.
Is that really…?
A tickling sensation in Severus's underbelly. Of course it is him. Severus knew it. He knew his posture; he recognized the shape of his body. Severus could even smell his infatuating scent. His pulse quickened instantly.
A burning breath on Severus's cheek. The lips so close to his own that his mouth unwillingly fell ajar. Longing, yearning, wanting him so desperately he was going nuts. For about a second, because the kiss was immediate. He moaned into his mouth, drawing him closer, lips on lips, a tongue on a tongue, hot air in between as both of them gasped.
Then, the lips left Severus's mouth, but did not stop kissing. They traced their path along Severus's jawline, continuing down his neck. Simultaneously, firm palms rubbed his shoulders and his sides.
Severus entangled his fingers in his unruly hair. “James,” he groaned in a low voice, oh, finally!, he just thought. And surrendered entirely to the bloody Marauder, the most handsome of all four, who had been chasing him in his most secret dreams when he used to study at Hogwarts.
“‐not him,” the lips breathed against his collarbone.
“What?”
The lips stopped. And left Severus's skin.
“I'm not James,” a familiar voice repeated, quiet and calm. “He's been dead for years already.”
What?!
Before Severus managed to reply, a strange suspicion unfolding in his chest, the man who was supposed to be James, who had been kissing him in an achingly marvellous, deeply arousing way just seconds ago, did nothing but straighten up and looked into Severus's face. With a pair of…
No.
With a pair of his incomprehensibly illuminated–
No!
Bright. Green. Eyes.
Severus woke up with a violent jerk. His heart was racing, both his body and soul perfectly ready to give him—not James—whatever he could possibly want.
Oh wow.
“F*ck!”
***
“You did not show up for three damn days!” Leonida admonished him instead of greeting.
“I took the Calming Concoction as you had wanted me to, and had to go through the so-called healing part,” he replied harshly. “Feelin’ good, thank you very much indeed!”
“So you saw something disheartening?” she asked with an honest concern.
Severus just folded his arms.
“Any happy promises?” she tried with a mischievous smile.
“Definitely not anything like that!” Severus bristled.
“All right,” Leonida didn't lose her cool. “Now let's work! And by the way… Today, the auror is coming to start the cooperation. I've told you that the Ministry wants us to provide some special potions regularly, haven't I?”
***
Later that day, the pharmacy door opened. The auror came in, his physique as if a sculptor carved it from a precious piece of stone, wearing purple robes with a big golden M embroidered on the chest.
Leonida was somewhere inside the hospital, so it was up to Severus to handle the meeting. To handle the presence of a well-known face with a gorgeous, uncertain smile on his lips, lighting up even his eyes, flashing through his glasses.
“Good evening, sir,” the auror said in a calm voice. A disturbingly calm voice, concerning the situation in which Severus heard it last time. He had not seen him for ages before that. Since the bloody trial, to be specific.
An awkward silence fell.
Harry Potter cleared his throat, apparently nervous and… undeniably cute at the same time. “Mr. Snape, well—I am aware that we… did not get along exactly well. But… I think… This time, we can make it right.” Bright green eyes incomprehensibly illuminated by some impossible, secret source of light, full of something that could have been an honest plea. “Can't we?”
For Merlin's sake… F*ck.