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Need Robby. Gotta find Robby. Pa…Robby will make it all okay.
Jack didn’t register his self-correcting thoughts beyond the overwhelming need to find his soulmate and crawl in his arms for the next year at least.
He’d woken up that morning in those arms, the usual dread of having to leave them, even temporarily, somehow stronger than usual. Robby had left an hour before Jack, a long day of meetings ahead of him, so Jack hadn’t even had stolen cuddles and sneaky gropes to look forward to.
Every decent thing that Jack experienced throughout the day had simply reminded him that Robby wasn’t there to share in them, and every bad moment had made Jack crave his comfort and warmth. He’d held himself together with sheer stubborn determination, and the texts Robby snuck him whenever he could. (Mostly the texts.)
The final straw had been minor in the grand scheme of things, but Jack felt it like an IED all the same. An unhappy parent had used Jack as target practice for their unhappiness in multiple aspects of their life, blaming him for everything from their child’s cold to the weather outside. Normally, he let shit like that roll off his back, but the persistent lack of the one person he’s wanted and needed all day meant that it just wasn’t possible.
So now, shift change finally behind him, Jack is on a mission to track his man down and get the hell out of here.
All I need is Pap…Robby and home.
Jack quickens his pace the closer he gets to Robby’s office. His leg and hip are on fire, but everything in him is calling out for Robby and he knows the pain now will be worth the physical and emotional release that’s coming.
Robby’s office door is partially propped open, dingy, yellow light streaming through the gaps. Jack can hear Robby grumbling at what must be paperwork, and the low sound soothes Jack’s nerves; just that is enough to have his shoulders dropping in relief. He pushes open the door enough to walk through, shutting it softly behind him, firmly blocking out the rest of the world.
Robby is bent over his desk, typing away on the laptop in front of him, papers and an iPad scattered across the surface. The muttering is clearer now, but Jack ignores the words, just letting the voice itself wash over him. At the click of the lock, Robby looks up, smile blooming and eyes crinkling when he sees Jack leaning against the door.
“Hey, baby. You’re a sight for sore eyes.”
Jack melts. “Hi, Papa.”
The only reason Jack doesn’t bolt and run away to Mexico is because his whole body freezes him in place once the word finally registers in his brain.
(Also, if he’s gonna run away to Mexico, he refuses to go without Robby, which would defeat the purpose.)
“Um. Hi. Yeah. I don’t know why I said that so if we can just ignore it and pretend it never happened?” Jack knows he’s rambling, but he’s too panicked to do anything about it. “Just tired, crappy day. You ready to go home?”
Robby looks thoughtful. “Sure, sweetheart. We can forget about it.” He stands up from his seat, stretching his back out before pulling himself to his full height. “Or, we can talk about it and I can happily give you something that you might need.”
Jack knows him well enough to know that Robby would never judge anyone for any kink or want or need they had in a relationship, but he still can’t help but search his face intently, looking for any sign of disgust or criticism. (And of course, he doesn’t find anything other than love and acceptance.)
He wonders if this is how Robby feels when he’s trying to convince Jack that something doesn’t matter.
And now that the word is out there, he’s realizing that maybe it does matter.
Jack feels uncharacteristically shy, but the little voice in his head that sounds suspiciously like Papa Robby (…Papa?) says that he can’t run away from this when he’s always making Robby talk about the hard things. Dammit.
Before he can figure out how to start, Robby moves around the desk and holds out his arms. “Would it be easier to talk about it if I’m holding you?” Jack throws himself against Robby’s chest before he finishes the sentence. This is what he’s been aching for all day.
Jack’s entire body goes to liquid immediately. Robby picks him up in a bridal hold and carries him over to the ratty old loveseat in the corner of the room. Sitting down, he arranges Jack to his liking, legs draped over Robby’s lap, back supported by the stack of pillows he keeps in here just for Jack and his cat naps.
“So. Is it safe to assume by your complete panic that this is a new thing for you?” Robby’s voice is low and conversational, asking what to him is a straightforward question. As soothing as the rumble is, the question is anything but simple in Jack’s mind.
Jack shrugs. “Kinda?” He hides his face in Robby’s neck, absentmindedly playing with the fingers of the hand not rubbing calming circles into his aching hip. “It’s the first time I’ve fully thought it, but I think it’s maybe been lurking for a while?” A flash of memory hits him with his new hindsight, and he’s forced to correct himself. “Well, the second time I’ve thought it, but definitely the first time I’ve said it.”
“Hmm. Can you tell me about the first time?” Robby noses into the fine hair at Jack’s temple, pressing soft kisses along his hairline. He must feel Jack tense slightly, because Robby hugs him tighter. “It’s okay, baby, I promise.”
Jack is silent for a moment, before taking a deep breath. “The first time we met. Monty wanted to introduce us, but you were talking with a nurse. As I stood there waiting, the only thought I can remember from that moment is That’s Papa. But I didn’t know what that meant, so I just ignored it and moved on.” He nuzzles closer. He can feel the blush on his face and he hides it in Robby’s chest. “Honestly? I still don’t really understand.”
“And that’s okay. We can figure it out together.” Robby presses a kiss to the top of Jack’s head. “I’m gonna take you home in a minute. But if it’s okay with you, I have some questions I want to throw at you, just so you have some ideas to think about?” Jack nods against Robby’s chest and he’s rewarded with another kiss to his curls. “I know this is a lot, but it’s part of what we eventually need to work out, okay? Do you want this to be something that’s only during sex or something we explore outside of the bedroom? Or both? Do you see this becoming a standard aspect of our relationship? Or something that appears occasionally? How do you feel about the specific aspects of dom/sub or caretaking or the attraction to a familial connection that can go along with this dynamic?”
Jack’s mind is spinning, but the spark of panic he distantly expected doesn’t arrive; just being held safe in Robby’s arms is enough to keep him calm and settled inside himself. “But the most important thing I want you to think about isn’t a question, but an absolute certainty. No matter what you decide, I’m in. There isn’t a single thing you could want, could ask me for, that I won’t give you. If you decide you want to go full tilt ahead, I’m right there with you. If you decide that today was an anomaly and that isn’t what you want, I’m okay with that, too. I love you. No matter where this goes, that’s never gonna change. I’m into whatever you’re into because you are what matters to me. Everything else is just extras on top, okay?”
Jack keeps hiding in Robby’s hoodie, but he nods to show that he’s listening and that he understands. He knows that Robby knows that his face isn’t dry, but he’s thankful that he lets him pretend anyway. Robby always knows exactly what he needs to hear.
Jack also knows that he never has to doubt what Robby just said. No matter what, they’re going to be okay.
Robby sits in silence for a few minutes, giving Jack time to pull himself together, simply running his big, warm hand over his back and side. When he feels Jack squeeze the hand in his, Robby looks down at him, gentle, loving smile in place. “Ready to go home, baby?”
Jack takes a deep breath and smiles back.
“Yeah, papa, I’m ready.