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“Hey, Bucky,” Clint called over. Bucky knew that tone and went on high alert, turning to try and see whatever Clint had found.
“No.”
“What do you mean no? I haven’t even asked anything yet.”
“You only ‘hey Bucky’ me like that when you want something and the answer is no. There is nothing you found in the woods I want anything to do with.”
“Aw, come on. You gotta at least hear the question before you answer.”
“Then ask so’s I can say no already.”
“It’s times like this when I remember you’re actually an old fuddy-duddy. Come over here and look at what you’re saying no to, Grandpa.”
“You call me that in bed ever and you’re sleeping on the couch,” Bucky stated firmly as he made his way over to where Clint was squatting next to a tree. “Jesus Christ, Clint what is that thing?”
“It’s a baby! Don’t be rude. Look how cute he is, don’t you just want to cuddle him?”
“No, no I do not want to just cuddle it.” Bucky watched in horror as Clint reached out to pet the beast. “For fuck’s sake Clint, don’t touch it.”
“Aw, Buck, it ain’t gonna hurt me,” Clint said, hand already scritching around the thing’s ear. “Look at the baby, he just wants some lovin’. See, he likes me.”
And damned if the thing, whatever it was, didn’t seem to. It was leaning into Clint’s scratching fingers and there was a rusty droning coming from it that might have been a purr. But the things fangs were as long as Bucky’s fingers and he was not on board with them being that close to Clint’s anything.
“We are at pet capacity, Barton,” he said. “And there’s no way that thing is legal to keep in the city. How the hell big do you think it gets? Would it even fit in our apartment?”
“It’s a baby, not a thing. And no one would have to know.”
“There’s no way we’d be able to give it the kind of exercise it’d need; you already hate getting up in the morning to walk Lucky, we are not adding,” he stumbled for a moment, trying to think what to call the thing, “the baby to the mix. Alpine would riot.
“And if it’s a baby,” Bucky continued, rolling right over Clint as he tried to protest. “If you took it home you’d be taking it away from it’s mama. You don’t want to do that.”
“I guess,” Clint grumbled, shoulders sagging a little as he deflated.
“Now say goodbye and let’s get out of here before mama comes back and finds us messing with her baby.” He shuddered to think about how big an adult and it’s fangs out be.
“Fine.” Clint scritched and coo for another few moments, then stood, dusting his hands off on his tactical pants as he did so. “Guess we outta get you back to the rendezvous point and then home before you turn into a pumpkin anyway.”
“Keep calling me old and see what happens,” Bucky threatened. “You walk in front of me this time, so I can make sure you don’t wander off again.”
Clint blew a raspberry at him but led the way as requested.