Chapter Text
We were both sitting on the shore, close enough so we could watch the sea move along the wind, but at a distance that would allow us to talk without being seen (for me, at least).
It was freezing out there; even more after having been practicing with my bow only minutes ago, and a part of me wished I had stayed at the castle, next to a fire lit up just for me; the other part (the stronger one), however, was just glad I was with him. There was no way we could share a moment together like this inside; I was way too old to be seen talking to myself.
He had leaned next to me, and a shiver had run through my body. I had instinctively pressed my coat tighter around me, as he gave me an apologetic smile. He so often forgot my human body was sensitive to cold.
I didn’t mind being cold. I’d never had. As long as I could see him, talk to him, be with him four months a year, snow and ice and wind meant nothing to me. He knew that.
I had smiled, too, patting the spot next to me, inviting him. He didn’t doubt. Seconds only later, our bodies were touching through our clothes, and I let myself go against his frozen shoulder, listening to stories of fairies, magic bunnies and sandymen, as a content sigh left my lips.
And then, I woke up.
It took me a while to realize it was just a dream. For a moment, I had smiled and stretched up in my bed, thinking about all the amazing things we would do together today. It was winter, after all.
Then, as I slowly emerged from my dreamland, I remembered. He wouldn’t come this winter, nor would he come next, like he hadn’t the past one.
A long shiver ran through my body, just like in my dream. Except that this time, it had nothing to do with the cold and the touch of a very special young boy.
I gently leaned in my bed until my head touched the pillow, placing my hands underneath it. My eyes stayed open, and I couldn’t stop thinking about it.
Five years was a very long time.
I fear I will never know what happened. If he voluntarily left, if something took him away. I searched as far away as my ties to the kingdom would let me; I investigated. But looking for someone no one knows ever existed is not easy.
Even though I usually try to deny it, a part of me knows. Knows he was probably stupid enough to think that, for some reason, this was the right thing to do. That it was the best for both of us.
But five years was a very long time; and no matter what, a part of me never forgot.
I never stopped believing, Jack.
You’re the one who never came back.