Chapter Text
Izuku stared at his phone. The harsh glow of his screen irritated his eyes in the dark of his room. He rubbed at them absentmindedly. Stay awake, he told himself. Just a little longer.
His phone was open on a chat log. An empty one. Or at least, it hadn't been updated for a long time. Izuku scrolled up, through old conversations that made his heart hurt in his chest.
August 3
Izuku: Cant wait to see you 2night!! :p
Kacchan: dont get too excited nerd
Izuku: :):):)
Izuku: I had so much fun! I'm glad we could c eachother!!
Kacchan: ya whatever
Izuku: And we'll see eachother again right?
Izuku: Same time next week?
Kacchan: …
Kacchan: fine u little shit
August 17
Izuku: Can I come over?
Kacchan: why
Izuku: I just need to talk to you.
Kacchan: be here in twenty or im going to bed
Izuku: Be there in 10 :)
Izuku: Thanks Kacchan
Kacchan: thank me in person u idiot
Their last chat was from September.
September 13
Izuku: Kacchan?
Izuku: Kacchan Kacchan Kacchan
Izuku: Kachhhhhaaaannnnnn
Kacchan: I TOLD YOU TO STOP
Izuku: Can we please just talk?
Kacchan: no
Izuku: Please Kacchan
Izuku: Please
Izuku: Kacchan?
Now, the cool October air pressed in around him. It had been nearly a month with no messages.
He could scroll for hours through the texts. They just kept on going, through days and months. Quick chats texted on the side while he graded papers, to long open conversations about anything and everything.
In the beginning, it had been strange. Izuku was used to talking to Kacchan in person. He was used to his explosive words and deep voice that stirred a coil of longing deep inside him. When he talked to Kacchan, he could look into his deep red eyes, try and decipher the depths hidden there.
Online was different.
Kacchan had finally gotten his own phone in July. Of course, he had had a work one for ages. But that was for work only, he always reminded everyone. If they had to talk to him about work, or something else important, they could reach him through there. Otherwise, they had to tell it to him in person. If you have something to say, you say it to my face.
But then Kirishima, who was Kacchan's best friend, was stationed in America. And Kirishima had just insisted Kacchan text him like a normal person. But because he was always extra, Kacchan had just… bought a whole new phone, strictly for his personal conversations.
Izuku could vaguely remember texting Kacchan in high school. But they hadn't really since then, for a long time. In fact, they barely kept in touch. It wasn't really either of their faults. Kacchan was swamped with hero work, and Izuku with teaching. And when his old class funded Izuku a new hero suit, what little free time Izuku had was then filled with hero work.
And, well, it was a little hard to stay in touch with someone who wouldn't let you text them.
But whenever Izuku saw his old friend's face in the news, he couldn't help but smile to himself.
Then the phone came, and everything changed.
The first text came in July.
July 25
Unknown User: is that you????
Izuku: Who is this?
Unknown User: THE FUCK U MEAN WHO IS THIS?
Unknown User: DID U FUCKIN SFORGET ABOUT ME YOU LITTLE GSHIT?
Izuku: Kacchan?
Unknown User: took u long enoughb
Izuku had updated Bakugo's name to the childhood nickname he always used. Even after all these years, calling him Bakugo felt… wrong. He would always be Kacchan.
Izuku: Why are you texting me from a new number?
Kacchan: kiri told me i had to tex him while he's in america so i got a ne wphkon e
Izuku: Woah, you good?
Kacchan: ya just not used to texting on this stupid thing
Izuku: All good
Izuku: So what's up? Why'd you text me?
Kacchan: r u doing anything this weekend
Izuku: I'm actually not free untill August 3, why>?
Kacchan: i got the weekend off but i can get that day too
Kacchan: like i guess i havent seen u in a long time and i miss making fun of your stupid face
Izuku felt his face heat as he read the message.
Izuku: Did you have something in mind?
Kacchan: whatever u want nerf
Kacchan: nuke
Kacchan: nurd
Kacchan: FUCKING ENRD
Kacchan: IM GONNA FUCKING BREAK THIS FIUDCIJONJ THOGIN
Izuku: 😂🤣
After that, they would text almost every night until two in the morning. It didn't matter that Izuku had to get up at six to get dressed and go to work. Or that Kacchan worked until late, roaming the streets in search of crime. All that mattered were those few golden hours.
Izuku would tuck himself into his blankets, arms wrapped around an authentic All Might plush. His phone in hand, the only light in the dark. His fingers typed at a furious pace. There was so much to say, so much he had to get out, that rushed texts didn't feel like enough.
Those hours meant everything. If he was having a long day at work, the tiring hours refusing to pass by, he would think of later. The warmth of his bed, the light of his screen. The childlike glee in his heart as he texted Kacchan. Every night, like clockwork. During the day, all he thought of was the night. All that mattered was him.
Izuku hadn't even realized how much he missed Kacchan. His absence wasn't painful until Izuku remembered what it was like to be in his prescence. Even if texting presented only a fraction of who kacchan truly was, Izuku would cherish every little bit he got.
They planned for August 3. A cute ramen shop Izuku frequented. It was normally a place he went with friends, so why would bringing Kacchan be any different?
But it was different. And Izuku quickly realized maybe there was more to Kacchan's sudden reapareance in his life than he'd initially expected.
It was in the lingering looks. The brush of his hand against his. Nothing was said. But actions conveyed far more than words ever could.
And Izuku couldn't help but like the feeling. He hadn't had much luck in love. Or any, really. He'd had a thing with Hatsume for a few months a couple years ago, but it went nowhere. And then there was this one boy, and Izuku thought he liked him; but looking back, the red flags were there. Particularly, his strong dislike of All Might…
They continued to text after that.
August 4
Izuku: You there?
Izuku: …
Kacchan: yep
Kacchan: what is it
Izuku: I have an idea
Kacchan: care to share?
Izuku: I feel like, since it's been a long time since we've really talked on a frequent basis, we should get to re-know eachother.
Kacchan: is this the fucking first day of school icebreakers all over again?
Izuku: No no, I already knwo your favourite food and colour.
Kacchan: so what is it
Izuku: Orange and mapo tofu, or anything spicy.
Kacchan: WRONG
Izuku: What?
Izuku: I know I'm not wrong about the spicy stuff
Izuku: Unless somethings changed.
Kacchan: I love spicy golf
Kacchan: food
Kacchan: fuck this shit
Izuku: So what's your favourite colour?
Kacchan: im not doing god das,n icebreakers
Kacchan: go deep
Izuku: Ok. Who do u look up to most?
Kacchan: same as u fucke
Izuku: All Might?
Kacchan: why was that even a question
Kacchan: try again
Izuku: Ok
Izuku: Deepest regret?
Kacchan: too deep
Izuku: You're being difficult.
Kacchan: what's ur biggest regret
Izuku: …probably loosing touch with you for so long.
Kacchan: ya i guess
They quickly began to make as much time for eachother as they could. What started as weekly meet ups, soon turned into rapid rendezvous' at coffee shops and libraries on lunch breaks and after hours. Their nightly texting turned into nightly strolls through the city, though when that wasn't possible, they still returned to the texting.
August 12
Kacchan: zuku
Kacchan: fuckin nerd
Kacchan: answer me u ho
Kacchan: you have ten seconds
Izuku: Sorry sorry sorry!! I was just taking a shower
Kacchan: hot
Kacchan: SHIT
Kacchan: how do u un send a message
Kacchan: zuku i unsent that ok
Izuku: 😅
Izuku: What's up?
Kacchan: im bored
Izuku: Wanna meet up somewhere?
Kacchan: cant
Izuku: 😢
Kacchan: im on a ten minute break and im nowhere near ur apartment
Izuku: Okkkk
Izuku: I saw they're making a new All Might Documentary.
Izuku: Wanna go seee it in theatres when in comes out?
Kacchan: no
Izuku: :(
Izuku: Why not?
Kacchan: movie theatres are scams
Kacchan: ur paying to watch something u could watch at home for free and then you get compelled into buying overpriced ekp33opkcorn with fake butter and its a scam did so know
Izuku: I'll pay
Kacchan: what day did u say it was?
Izuku: 🤣 it comes out in a week
Kacchan: let's fuckin do it
They had gone to see the movie on August 19. Izuku bought the tickets online. They were expensive, but it was worth it. The two of them had pulled some strings to get the evening off.
At the movies, Kacchan arrived in baggy jeans and a sweater. His hair was tousled, shining golden in the light of the setting sun. Izuku didn't think he'd ever seen someone so beutiful.
Inside, they bought overpriced popcorn and drenched it in fake butter. The documentary was just OK, but the best part was when Kacchan reached out and took Izuku's hand. Even better was when he didn't let go.
What the hell happened?
One day, everything had been fine. Izuku would text Kacchan when he was down and come over to his apartment. They'd sit on the couch and Izuku would rest his head on Kacchan's shoulder. They would laugh and the time and all of Izuku's problems would just disappear. They weren't official. They hadn't even talked about any of that. What they had was just a… connection. And where that connection was going, who could say?
And then one day, everything was different.
Maybe it wasn't one day. Maybe it had happened slowly, and Izuku hadn't realized. Looking back, there were signs. But Izuku had been so happy to share such a close bond, to have someone he could talk to about anything.
August 23
Izuku: I can't wait to see you tommorow!
Izuku: We're still meeting at Tokyo Tide right?
Kacchan: i cant
Kacchan: something came up
Kacchan: sorry
Izuku: oh
Izuku: ok
Izuku: When can I see you next?
Kacchan: im not sure yet
Izuku: is something wrong?
Izuku: Kacchan?
August 26
Izuku: Kacchan, you up?
Kacchan: ya
Izuku: Something happened at work today and I'm really upset, can you talk?
Kacchan: im really tired
Kacchan: and i work tommorow
Kacchan: sorry
Izuku: Ok, have a good sleep then.
Izuku understood being tired. He was exhausted all the time. But the next day, Kacchan could have checked in on him and asked what was wrong. But he didn't. Izuku never brought it up again.
August 31
Izuku: I feel like we haven't talked in awhile.
Kacchan: i've been really busy
Izuku: I know, is everything OK?
Kacchan: im fine
September 8
Izuku: Can we meet up sometime this week?
Kacchan: maybe
Izuku: are you free on the 12?
Kacchan: i dont know ill have to check if denki wants to do anything
Izuku: ok then
Izuku: just let me know
September 11:
Izuku: so are you free tommorow?
Kacchan: sorry nno
Izuku: how come
Izuku: Kacchan?
Kacchan: im busy
Kacchan: maybe we should stop talking
Izuku: What???
Izuku: what do you mean?
Izuku: Kacchan????????
Izuku: ????????
September 13
Izuku: Kacchan?
Izuku: Kacchan Kacchan Kacchan
Izuku: Kachhhhhaaaannnnnn
Kacchan: I TOLD YOU TO STOP
Izuku: Can we please just talk?
Kacchan: no
Izuku: Please Kacchan
Izuku: Please
Izuku: Kacchan?
All this led to Izuku staring at his phone, trying to stay awake, just in case. Just in case he would see that little dot dot dot, and know Kacchan was finally texting him back.
When he thought of the past couple months, they were a whirlwind of excitement. Excitement over his work, and also Kacchan. And now, his life just felt… out of place. knocked askew. How did you go from texting someome every night until two in the morning to not texting them at all? He didn't know. He hadn't felt this way before. He and Kacchan hadn't even been a thing, but Izuku found himself missing his comfort. The knowledge of knowing someone else had his back, that he always had something to turn to.
He hadn't really talked to anyone about this. He probably should.
He thought of who he could turn to, who from his high school days he kept close contact with and his new friends from work. He could talk to Uraraka, but it felt weird to go to her about relationship troubles when she was happily married. So he decided on Todoroki, since he knew better than anyone how to work through relationship issues.
October 7
Izuku: Todoroki?
Todoroki: Izuku?
Izuku: Are you free some time soon?
Todoroki: Yes, I am free tommorow afternoon, the morning of the tenth, and all day on the twelfth.
Izuku got off work on the twelfth around four, and he could move his hero duties to the next day.
Izuku: Wanna meet on the 12? After four
Todoroki: Sure. What is this about?
Izuku: I just wanted to talk to you about something.
Todoroki: OK. Wanna come to my place? We can order food.
Izuku: 👍👍👍
Izuku: See you then!!
Todoroki: See you then.
Of all his high school friends, Izuku had stayed closest with Todoroki. Partly because he was an excellent communicator, and the kindest, most genuine person he knew. And the best friend Izuku could ask for.
It was so easy to make plans with Todoroki. A striking difference from those last few weeks talking to Kacchan, when it seemed he was doing everything he could to not see Izuku. It made Izuku realize how important his friends were. Real friends wouldn't just change their mind about you on a whim. They would stand by your side, and be there when it mattered. Without expecting anything from you.
Izuku put his phone down. He should sleep. But when he closed his eyes, his mind wouldn't settle. The same thoughts had been circling all month. What had Izuku done wrong? What mistake did he make? Why did Kacchan stop liking him? Where did it all go wrong?
Izuku sighed and clutched at his head. He had never felt so alone. All the people of Japan adored him and would gladly stand by his side. But the one person he wanted there, wanted nothing to do with him.