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Keonho had never been a very clingy person.
Or rather, he didn't like receiving physical contact, but when he wanted it, he was the first to seek it.
It had always been that way, and even his own members confirmed it...or at least almost all of them.
Like every person, Keonho also had his weakness and fortunately (or unfortunately for him) his weakness was one of his members.
Kim juhoon.
Juhoon and Keonho knew each other before they were under the label of "CORTIS members." They were always more than that.
Keonho was the reason why Juhoon finally agreed to join the group after rejecting numerous requests from the company.
Keonho was the person who pushed him to give his best, never making him feel wrong or out of place when something didn't go right.
And Keonho was the person who made him understand that some dreams don't necessarily have to disappear from our lives to make room for others... they could simply change shape and transform into something perhaps even more beautiful. And Keonho knew this well.
He had experienced it on himself.
Juhoon, on the other hand, had taught Keonho calmness, to truly care about someone and, most importantly, love.
Juhoon and Keonho had decided to pursue a relationship not long after their debut, in the "deep talk" that Keonho himself admitted to having with Juhoon at a fan meeting.
From there, everything changed.
Outside, they were normal members of the same group, but only when they returned to their apartment did they have the extra freedom of being themselves with each other.
It didn't take the members long to realize this, especially since Keonho didn't give them any way to hide it, and eventually, the two came to the conclusion that they had to tell each other.
Obviously, the other three were more than happy, and deep down, they were even tired with having to watch them continue to act like something they'd never actually been.
Over time, the two had found a balance both in front of and behind the cameras...even if things sometimes got a little out of hand.
From Keonho's side, of course.
The younger one always found a way to invade the older one's personal space: in videos, where if you asked "Where's Keonho?" you simply had to find Juhoon; during concerts, where he always sought his attention during songs or in the simplest gestures, like putting his arm around Juhoon's shoulders or having those little moments of jealousy that fortunately appeared to others as just childish behavior from a normal maknae.
Juhoon had warned Keonho many times not to draw too much attention, not to stand too close to him, and not to do anything that might cause suspicion.
His concern wasn't exaggerated because Juhoon was just scared.
He was afraid of what would happen if their fans found out about their relationship.
Would they have accepted them? Would they have seen them as "unnatural"? Would they have hated them? Could it have resulted in something negative for the group? Or even for Keonho?
Juhoon had often stopped to think about these scenarios, but in all those times, he had found a sweet reassurance that calmed him, making him know that everything would be okay. And that was why Juhoon loved Keonho.
Having him by his side allowed him to maintain the calm that had always distinguished him, and, magically, with a kiss and a few cuddles, everything returned to normal.
That day, however, was anything but normal.
The calendar was marked red. February 14th.
Whoever you asked, they'd all say it was Valentine's Day, but in that apartment, something even bigger was being celebrated.
Keonho's birthday.
It was his first birthday actually spent as a group called CORTIS, and it was also his first birthday he'd spend with thousands of other people on live.
Luckily, his members had reassured him the day before that they would be there to keep him company, and so they did.
The boys weren't in Korea that day, but even without keeping Korean time, they wanted to fulfill Keonho's request to do a live at midnight.
When the time came, Seonghyeon started the live, and immediately, COERS from all over the world joined in.
Together, the four wished Keonho a happy Valentine's Day, singing, laughing, and eating the beautiful, entirely chocolate cake that hen Seonghyeon asked him "why is there only chocolate?", Keonho simply replied, "because it's Valentine's Day."
After making his wish and blowing out the candles, the live continued as normal. The boys chatted, interacting with each other and with the fans, and Keonho seemed very happy to be there.
Of course, being the "star of the day" wouldn't stop him from thinking about the person next to him right now.
Juhoon had taken Keonho's right side specifically to be next to him.
Even though he couldn't do much in that situation, he still wanted to stay close to him and resist for the little over 30 minutes of live they'd already decided from the start they wanted to spend.
Keonho had tried. He could have sworn it to himself several times. But you know how it is? When you have THE KIM JUHOON as a boyfriend, holding back was almost impossible.
It all started out simple: Keonho staring at Juhoon for a few seconds too long, Keonho making their shoulder-to-shoulder interaction seem like the most normal thing in the world, or those usual moments where Keonho looked for any way to even just touch him with his hands.
Juhoon, on the other hand, could tolerate it. All he had to do was remain inconspicuous, and everything would be fine.
Unfortunately, he was wrong.
During the live, Keonho went looking for his sweater. A large yellow and gray striped sweater, which he put on immediately because he was cold.
He kept it on normally for a good five minutes before his brain processed his big idea.
Slowly, he slipped his arms out of the sleeves, keeping them inside his sweater for a bit. Just long enough to make it seem like a purely casual thing.
The four of them were simply talking, but suddenly, Juhoon stopped.
The older boy felt a slight warmth on his lower back, which gradually moved in a slow, gentle move.
Keonho's now warm hand found its way under the older boy's hoodie, intent on touching his bare back.
There was no malice in the gesture.
Keonho just wanted to touch his boyfriend as if it were something he hadn't done in a very long time.
With his fingertips, he began to trace his back, grazing his soft, smooth skin with delicate touches as if he were afraid he might soon hurt himself.
He ran his fingers along the lower part of his spine, then slowly continued to run them up his right side, applying gentle pressure without hurting him.
Meanwhile, Keonho watched everything.
He knew Juhoon wouldn't show any changes in his behavior; in fact, he continued to talk calmly with the other three. Or at least that's what he was trying to do.
Keonho knew him well by now. He knew his expressions, he knew the meaning of the short pauses he made between words, and he knew his weaknesses very well. His back was one of them.
His eyes noticed the slight pink tint that was painting his cheeks, his chest moving more slowly than before, and those fleeting glances that indirectly told him to stop.
Keonho found it all very funny. He loved teasing his boyfriend and seeing what he could actually do in such a situation.
He didn't really expect anything from him. Knowing Juhoon, e would have preferred to let him do it in the hope that he'd get tired or wait until the end of the live.
But, without warning, Keonho found himself having to reconsider everything he'd been thinking about.
He felt a sudden, light grip around his wrist as his hand slowly slipped out of Juhoon's hoodie.
The older one placed his hand on his, almost as if to stop him.
Keonho smiled slightly.
He left a few seconds for Juhoon to think he was actually finished but, before he could withdraw his hand, Keonho took it back, slowly intertwining their fingers.
For a few seconds, Juhoon did nothing.
He let Keonho's fingers intertwine with his, in a way so normal, so simple, so familiar, that for a moment even he forgot about the situation around him.
He gave his hand a light squeeze, and that was enough of a response for Keonho.
The smile on the younger boy's lips grew ever so slightly, and while he pretended to be genuinely interested in the conversation before him, his thumb gently caressed the back of his boyfriend's hand.
Juhoon briefly lowered his gaze. Not to their hands, but slightly forward, absorbing and holding onto the sensations he was experiencing.
And that was exactly the problem.
Because, no matter how hard he tried, it was hard to give up something that came so naturally to him.
Especially when it came to Keonho.
Their fingers remained intertwined for a few more seconds, partially hidden by the younger boy's sweater and their bodies, which were almost uncomfortably close.
Then Juhoon suddenly remembered the camera. The fans. How all it took was one wrong move or a moment of distraction to transform an innocent gesture into something to question.
His grip slowly loosened, and it didn't go unnoticed by Keonho.
Juhoon effortlessly withdrew his hand completely, resting it on his knee as he resumed following the conversation.
As if absolutely nothing had happened.
Keonho remained still for a moment.
He wasn't angry. He couldn't be in a situation like this, where the reason for his actions was right before his eyes.
And yet, a small part of him couldn't help but feel disappointed because, even though he knew Juhoon was afraid, he sometimes hoped he would allow himself, even just for a second, to forget about it.
His gaze returned to the older boy's face, lingering for a second too long on his lips as he spoke to Martin about something he had become futile pursuing.
He could have let it go. He probably should have, but Keonho had never been particularly good at giving up on things he wanted.
So, after waiting a few moments, he let his hand slide behind Juhoon's back again.
The situation repeated itself, but this time he was more cautious.
He didn't immediately seek a reaction; he just wanted to stay there and perhaps silently convince him to let go for a few more minutes.
Juhoon obviously felt it.
For the briefest of moments, his gaze drifted to the little boy's sweater, which was moving with almost imperceptible movements, as the warmth of his hand made its way back to his skin.
It was so easy. He would have only had to move his hand slightly, find Keonho's, and squeeze again.
But his fear was enough to keep it from happening.
Juhoon kept his hand where it was, continuing to listen to the others without returning the touch.
Keonho waited. A second. Two.
Maybe three. But nothing.
Nothing was returned.
Finally, Keonho slowly withdrew his hand, then tucked his arms into the sweater in the correct position, and everything resumed its normal course.
The conversation, the live. Everything.
The smile he'd had on his lips until a moment before, however, faded slightly, and his body seemed to tense.
These were small, almost unnoticeable changes.
Subtle enough to seem normal to anyone else, but visible enough for Juhoon to notice almost immediately.
Keonho was an open book to him. What remained oblivious to others, was not oblivious to him.
He tried not to think about it. He was the one who wanted to keep his distance, after all. He was the one who withdrew his hand and ignored his second attempt.
He should have felt relieved, but sadly, he wasn't, and he knew exactly why.
He remained silent.
When others laughed, he laughed too. When someone asked him a question, he answered casually.
Yet, all he really wanted was to end the live and focus all his attention on the boy next to him, hoping only that Keonho would still let him.
୨୧┈୨୧
The live ended shortly afterward with the members' usual bye-bye and recommendations, allowing tranquility and silence to return to the apartment.
The five then set about clearing away everything they'd left lying around, placing the rest of the cake in the refrigerator and throwing away what they'd used during the live.
Once finished, they simply said goodnight before heading to their respective rooms.
In the room he shared with James, Juhoon was still awake, his phone turned on in his hands, which he glanced at absentmindedly to distract himself.
James, after finishing his evening skincare ritual, turned off the bedroom light and settled under the covers.
The light from the younger boy's phone caught his attention, and he slowly turned to face him.
<<Juhoon, don't stay out too late. We have a lot to do tomorrow, and we need you to be in top form...>>
The older boy's words reached Juhoon's ears, his tone tired and almost authoritative, but at the same time, concerned for his safety.
<<Don't worry, hyung, I'll be asleep soon.>>
The boy didn't move; his back was turned to James, and James looked at him for a few more seconds, as if to make sure it wasn't just another promise made just to end the conversation.
In the end, however, he resigned himself and, with a sigh, turned away.
<<Good night.>>
A few minutes later, James's breathing became more regular and the room fell into absolute silence.
Juhoon remained still, his phone in his hands, his fingers moving across the screen in an almost possessed manner, and his eyes moved, reading words that couldn't quite stick in his mind.
His mind was still on live.
Everything that had happened flashed through his mind, as if he could find something in those images to stop him from feeling that way.
He sighed softly.
He didn't regret breaking off that contact, or at least he kept telling himself it had been the right choice.
And yet, thinking back, he couldn't ignore the expression he'd seen on Keonho's face immediately afterward.
He didn't want Keonho to feel rejected. He didn't want that simple gesture to make him feel guilty for simply wanting to touch him.
That he wanted to feel him closer.
He then closed his eyes for a few seconds, hoping that with that gesture he could silence all his thoughts, and when he opened them again, he realized he couldn't let that moment end like that.
He didn't want to feel like this anymore.
He didn't want to think that his ears could have hurt the one person he loved so much with all his heart.
He looked down at his phone, opening the conversation at the top of his list.
He paused for a few seconds with his fingers still on the keyboard, unsure of what to write.
Finally, he was talking to Keonho; something simple and sincere was all he needed.
Juhoon: Are you awake?
In the next room he shared with Martin and Seonghyeon, Keonho was lying on his bed, trying to convince himself it was time for bed.
Martin had long since fallen asleep, and between his sighs, he could be heard talking to himself about something related to their upcoming album. Seonghyeon, on the other end, was still awake, headphones in his ears and his phone in his hands.
He stood there for a few seconds, staring at the ceiling in a position that, from the outside, looked as if he were ready to be placed in a grave.
With a heavy sigh, he decided to close his eyes, but it was just at that moment that the screen of his phone, placed on the nightstand next to his bed, lit up.
Almost abruptly, Keonho turned around, picking up the device, and it was at that moment that Juhoon's name appeared at the top of the screen.
Keonho read the message and, for a split second, remained still.
He almost smiled.
Of course he was awake.
Despite what had happened during the live, he couldn't help but be mad with Juhoon. He might have been hurt, he might have wished things had gone differently, but he would never confuse his boyfriend's fear with a lack of love.
He immediately responded.
Keonho: Yes, why?
The answer came shortly after.
Juhoon: Do you want to come to my room?
Keonho stared at the screen for a few seconds.
He felt his heart make that familiar, sudden leap he knew all too well, and his smile widened a little.
His first instinct was to get up immediately, but he held back, glancing over at Seonghyeon.
He absolutely didn't want to have to explain why he was going to Juhoon's room at that hour, especially now that he had a chance to spend time with him.
On the other hand, refusing such a request from his boyfriend was out of the question.
He placed the phone on the bed, pulled back the covers, and stood up, trying to make as little noise as possible as he strode toward the door.
He reached for the doorknob, but just before he could even move it to open it, Seonghyeon spoke.
<<Where are you going?>>
Keonho froze for a moment.
Then he turned slightly, finding himself facing the curious gaze of Seonghyeon, who had meanwhile removed one of his headphones.
<<In the bathroom>>
He replied in a dry tone, trying not to reveal any suspicion.
Seonghyeon, for his part, looked at him for a few seconds, not seeming particularly convinced.
<<Ah>>
<<What?>>
Keonho asked, then raised an eyebrow, almost offended by his response.
<<Nothing, don't take too long.>>
Keonho gave him an innocent smile and then nodded.
<<Sure, you go get some sleep instead.>>
Seonghyeon stifled a small laugh before putting his headphone back on, shaking his head slightly, as if to chase away that extra word he'd prevented himself from saying.
Keonho finally left the room and closed the door behind him with the utmost care, making sure the sound of the lock didn't wake Martin.
Only when he found himself in the hallway did he allow himself a small smile and, very calmly, made his way to the older boy's room.
Juhoon stared at the conversation with a slight heaviness in his chest.
The younger one had viewed it without responding, and even left the chat.
He knew this behavior wasn't typical of Keonho, but he couldn't help but feel that way with everything he already had inside him.
After a few minutes, however, he heard the door open, but he didn't immediately turn around.
His body jerked slightly but remained in the same position.
He didn't need to check who had entered.
He knew those light footsteps all too well, the way Keonho tried not to make a sound when he thought someone was sleeping, and even the small rustle his clothes made when he moved.
He continued to stare at the screen for a few seconds, pretending to be engaged, as if the fear of a possible rejection hadn't yet appeared on his face.
Then, when the younger boy stopped in front of him, he finally looked up.
Their eyes met.
For a moment, neither of them said anything.
Juhoon simply watched him, lingering on his face and the small confused expression Keonho had acquired without even realizing it.
The older boy turned off the screen and placed the phone face down on the nightstand. Then he lifted the covers slightly with one hand, clearing the space beside him.
Nothing else was needed. Keonho had understood immediately.
Without asking, he slipped under the covers and settled against him, almost instinctively seeking space in his arms.
He wrapped both arms around Juhoon's waist and buried his face in his chest, letting his warmth mingle with that of the older boy's body.
Juhoon welcomed him, holding him close.
He wrapped his arm around his shoulders and rested his chin on his head, while his free hand slowly began to caress his hair.
Keonho closed his eyes.
This was what he'd missed all evening. Being in that small, untouchable bubble of love they'd grown accustomed to creating when it was just the two of them.
He'd missed that feeling of being close to Juhoon without having to think about who was watching them, without having to measure every movement or wonder if any contact was too obvious.
He'd missed being able to simply be his boyfriend, and obviously he hadn't been the only one.
They stayed like that for several minutes, holding each other close without breaking the silence.
Keonho focused on Juhoon's steady, calm heartbeat against his ear, which brought him an inexplicable sense of calm.
Juhoon's hand had taken up a rhythm, running his hand through that dark, fragrant hair that was growing longer and longer.
It was a gesture he did often, especially when the youngest was tired or needed reassurance.
That night, however, he seemed to be the one who needed it most.
<<Keonho...>>
Juhoon's voice came low, almost a whisper.
The younger one opened his eyes, but didn't immediately raise his head.
<<Mmh?>>
Juhoon hesitated.
The words had caught in his throat, all at once, and suddenly none of them seemed right enough to express what he wanted to say.
He didn't know where to start, but, truth be told, he'd always been like that when his feelings were involved.
It was the one thing he wasn't good at.
He knew how he felt. He knew how much Keonho meant to him and how much he wanted to protect him, but finding a way to put all that into words wasn't something he was perfectly good at.
But Keonho knew better.
He knew him well enough to know that when Juhoon started a conversation like that, he needed to be heard until the end, without interruptions or prompting.
He just needed that silence to let him know he was ready to be heard.
So he remained silent, waiting.
<<I'm sorry about before.>>
The words came out slowly and unsteadily as his gaze wandered to some undefined spot in the room.
<<During the live...because of how I acted. I didn't mean to make you feel bad.>>
He paused briefly, swallowing.
His hand didn't stop its movement, but without realizing it, he pulled the younger boy a little tighter against him.
<<I know I'm thinking too much, I know I should be calmer, but it's stronger than me, and fear takes over on its own and...>>
He paused, letting out a small sigh.
<<I don't know... I'm really sorry...>>
Keonho didn't move. He remained in the same position, saying nothing.
He wanted to interrupt him at the first sentence, to tell him he didn't need to apologize for something like that, that he shouldn't feel guilty for being afraid.
But he also knew Juhoon needed to say it.
He needed to let out everything he'd been holding inside all night, even if doing so was more difficult than he cared to admit.
So he waited for him to finish, and only then did he move.
He settled more comfortably in Juhoon's arms, lifting himself just enough to be at his height. His hands didn't leave his hips, but moved only to hold him tight enough to let him know everything was okay.
That he was there. That he had listened to him.
Juhoon finally met his gaze, and that's when Keonho gave him a small, soft smile, before leaning closer until his forehead was against his.
<<Hey...it's okay, really. You did great, and there's no reason to apologize.>>
"<<Yes, I need to.>>
<<No Juhoon.>>
Keonho's tone remained soft, without the slightest hint of reproach.
<<You're right, okay? I understand why you're acting this way. I know you're scared, and I also know it's not something you can just decide not to feel at a moment's notice...>>
He paused for a moment. Just enough to let the older boy process his words and feel them as true.
<<But I don't want you to think I'm mad at you for this... I just wish you could stay a little calmer because, whatever happens, we'll get through this. Somehow, but we'll get through this...>>
Juhoon remained silent, staring at him, not even blinking once, almost afraid that the moment might end the moment it did.
<<You don't have to have all the answers now, and you don't have to stop being afraid to show me how you feel.>>
Those simple words created a tightness in Juhoon's chest that he wasn't sure how to interpret.
Because Keonho wasn't asking him to change overnight.
He was simply asking him not to let that fear grow so large that it would ruin what they had so carefully built up to that point.
Juhoon nodded slowly, unable to find an answer.
Keonho knew him well enough to understand that that simple movement didn't necessarily mean he'd calmed down or that everything in his head had disappeared all together.
So Keonho decided not to say anything else.
He didn't want to fill that moment with more words, or force him to respond to something he wasn't yet ready for.
He just wanted to let him know he was there.
Slowly, he moved a hand from his side, reaching for Juhoon's, who had slowly stopped stroking his hair.
When he took it, he gently grasped his fingers.
Then, without saying anything, he extended his index finger toward his. It barely touched him, as if it were a silent question.
Juhoon looked down at their hands.
For a moment, he remained still, observing that small gesture with an expression Keonho couldn't quite decipher.
Then, slowly, he raised his index finger and brought it close to the smaller one's, until they met.
Keonho smiled.
He began to move his finger slowly, tracing small movements against Juhoon's, moving away slightly before returning to seek it.
The older boy followed him with his gaze, letting Keonho lead the little game.
Their fingers barely touched, separating for a few centimeters, and then meeting again, as if neither of them truly wanted to break the contact.
After a few seconds, Keonho tilted his hand slightly, seeking Juhoon's with a slower movement.
Their fingers brushed again, and it was then that Juhoon was the first to seek that contact.
His fingers intertwined with the younger boy's, closing them around his hand until he could grasp it completely and squeezed it gently.
Keonho noticed immediately.
The smile that appeared on his lips was spontaneous, almost inevitable, and his eyes softened as he saw how Juhoon finally seemed to have calmed down.
He looked down at their intertwined hands, lingering for a moment on the older boy's fingers before slowly moving away.
Gently, he pulled Juhoon's hand toward him, rotating his wrist until the back of it was in front of his lips.
Juhoon followed him with his gaze, unresisting.
Keonho placed a small kiss on his skin, lingering the contact a little longer before looking up at the older boy and moving his hand away enough to speak.
<<Are you feeling better now?>>
The question came slowly, in that sweet tone Keonho intended only for him.
Juhoon stared at him for a moment, then smiled.
A real smile, this time. Without fear or dread.
<<Yes...much better now.>>
Keonho narrowed his gaze slightly.
<<Are you sure?>>
<<Yeah>>
<<Mmh...>>
The younger boy looked at him a second longer, scrutinizing him from top to bottom to see if he was actually telling the truth.
Juhoon, on the other end, raised a confused eyebrow.
<<What? You don't believe me?>>
<<I'm not saying that.>>
<<Even if you don't say it, your expression says otherwise.>>
<<And who are you to know what my expression says?>>
<<Your boyfriend.>>
After those words, Keonho didn't reply. Instead, he looked at him in silence, struck by the directness and confidence with which Juhoon had said those words.
Then they both laughed lightly.
It was one of those little silly things they often did, meaningless arguments that always ended like this, the same way.
<<Okay, okay, you're absolutely right...you really are my boyfriend.>>
He replied with that proud tone. Because that's how Keonho felt...proud to have Juhoon as his boyfriend, as his life partner, as the only person he was absolutely sure would never abandon him.
He continued to observe him, lingering on his eyes, on the slight creases that formed at the corners of his mouth when he smiled, and on that unique way of looking at him when he finally managed to feel at peace.
He looked at him as if it were the first time he'd laid eyes on him, as if he weren't real and could disappear at any moment.
Juhoon, for his part, didn't seem to have any intention of looking away. In fact, after a few moments, his expression changed slightly.
The smile narrowed, but it didn't disappear completely. It just looked softer and more sincere.
<<I love you.>>
Keonho blinked.
Once. Then again.
For a moment, he was almost convinced he'd misunderstood.
<<Huh?>>
Juhoon smiled a little wider, lightly squeezing his hand, as if that gesture would further confirm his words.
<<I love you, Keonho...I love you so much>>
Oh.
Oh.
Keonho felt his heart skip a beat so suddenly that, for a moment, he was almost afraid Juhoon could hear it through the small space separating them.
It wasn't that the elder never said it to him. Juhoon simply wasn't the type of person who says those words lightly.
His love manifested itself above all through small gestures, attentions, and care that Keonho had learned to recognize.
And yet, hearing him say it so suddenly, while looking him directly in the eyes, was completely different.
It was as if those two words had managed to reach a precise point in his chest, making him forget for a few seconds how to even breathe.
His cheeks began to heat up, turning a rosy shade that probably reached the tips of his ears.
And Juhoon noticed it almost immediately.
<<I didn't think two such simple words could turn you into a living tomato.>>
The boy said with that hint of irony, teasing him.
Keonho's eyes widened slightly.
<<I'm not red at all.>>
<<Oh no? I'm imagining things, then>>
<<Absolutely>>
Juhoon looked at him, clearly amused.
<<Okay.>>
<<Stop it.>>
<<Doing what?>>
<<Making that face.>>
The older boy raised an eyebrow at his response.
<<What face?>>
<<This face you have now.>>
The older boy burst into laughter, and Keonho wished he could come up with a retort convincing enough to make him stop teasing him immediately.
The problem was, when Juhoon laughed like that, his voice low so as not to wake James, his eyes closed, laughing along with him, Keonho practically forgot everything he was going to say.
It was unfair.
Really unfair.
How could someone be so beautiful even while teasing him?
<<Anyway>> the younger boy continued, clearing his throat in a desperate attempt to regain at least some of his dignity.
<<You can't just say things like that, all of a sudden.>>
Juhoon looked at him, his laughter slowly subsiding.
<<Why?>>
<<Because you can't>>
<<I can't tell you I love you?>>
<<That's not the point!>>
<<Then what is?>>
Keonho stared at him, his expression exasperated, and the only thing he wanted to do at that moment was hide his face somewhere and wait for his heart to stop beating so fast.
<<The point is you're about to give me a heart attack on my birthday!>>
Juhoon paused for a second at his boyfriend's sudden and ridiculous response.
Then he put a hand over his mouth to hold back a laugh.
<<A heart attack?>>
<<Yes, you hear me.>>
<<For telling you I love you.>>
<<Exactly!>>
Juhoon actually laughed this time.
Keonho looked at him for a few seconds, pretending to be deeply offended.
Then, inevitably, he found himself smiling too.
Because he could complain all he wanted, he could protest and pretend he was dying because of his boyfriend, but the truth was, he could listen to that laughter all night and never get tired of it.
And he would definitely be fine if his laught were the cause of his death.
<<I'm offended, just to let you know>>
The younger one said as he leaned a little closer to his face.
Juhoon slowly stopped laughing.
<<But you love me.>>
Keonho stopped again. He looked at him.
Juhoon looked back, with that satisfied expression of someone who knew perfectly well he'd just won an argument without even having to do anything.
Keonho let out a resigned sigh.
<<Unfortunately>>
<<Unfortunately, you say?>>
<<Yes, indeed.>>
<<Then maybe I should stop telling you certain things...>>
Juhoon retorted in a mock-disappointed tone.
Keonho's eyes widened.
<<Don't even try that because...>>
He couldn't finish his sentence.
Juhoon moved closer, closing the distance between them, and Keonho suddenly found himself forgetting what he'd been meaning to say.
The older boy smiled slightly, observing him for a few moments.
Then he lowered his gaze to Keonho's slightly parted lips.
Keonho noticed.
And this time, he didn't even have the strength to say anything.
He slowly approached, letting the distance close until their foreheads were once again touching.
For a moment they remained like that, their breaths mingling with each other's, their hands still entwined under the covers.
Keonho felt Juhoon's thumb gently caress the back of his hand, and finally, it was Juhoon who closed the last inch separating them.
Keonho's lips brushed Juhoon's with such gentleness that he could have pulled away if he wanted.
But Juhoon immediately returned the kiss.
The hand holding the younger one's tightened slightly, while the other moved from his back to the nape of his neck, stroking his hair with his fingertips.
Keonho tilted his head slightly, leaning closer, deepening the kiss with a more confident movement.
There was no rush.
It was a simple and sweet kiss.
One of those given when words were too light to express what was inside them.
That kiss contained everything.
It contained the reassurance he had been searching for all evening.
There was the tenderness with which Juhoon had welcomed him into his arms.
And there was that "I love you" that continued to ring intensely in his head.
He smiled slightly into the kiss, and after a good few minutes, the two separated. Slowly, as if neither actually wanted to let go but both needed it to catch their breath.
They remained close.
Their noses brushing, their eyes still half-closed.
Keonho smiled first.
<<I love you too Juhoon, more than you can imagine...>>
Juhoon caressed his cheek with his thumb.
<<I know.>>
Keonho pulled away a few centimeters at his response, just long enough to look at him with an indignant expression.
<<Remind me when you became so confident?>>
<<Always have, but I have my moments where I want to show it.>>
Keonho sighed as a surrendered smile formed on his face.
Then he practically threw himself on top of him, burying his face in his chest as Juhoon laughed again, grabbing him gently in his arms.
Juhoon placed a kiss in his hair, still smiling, and Keonho positioned himself against him, sliding an arm around his waist, holding him as tightly as possible.
He was back exactly where he'd wanted to be all along.
His cheek rested on Juhoon's chest, his fingers clinging to the fabric of his shirt, and his breathing slowly beginning to slow.
The older boy resumed stroking his hair, running his fingers through the dark locks.
A few minutes passed before Keonho decided to speak again.
<<Juhoon?>>
<<Mh?>>
<<Can I stay here and sleep?>>
At his words, Juhoon's hand paused for a moment.
He looked down at the younger boy, who had just raised his head to look at him with an all-too-innocent expression.
<<Ahn Keonho.>>
<<Mmh?>>
<<You have a room.>>
<<I know.>>
<<And a bed.>>
<<I know that too.>>
<<And two roommates.>>
<<And it wasn't my choice, but Martin is asleep and Seonghyeon is probably still on his phone.>>
Juhoon stared at him in silence.
Keonho gave him a sad little look, like a beaten puppy, hoping it would be enough to convince him.
<<Come on...>>
The older boy sighed, barely closing his eyes.
<<Okay.>>
At his statement, Keonho's expression changed, smiling like a child again.
<<Really?>>
<<Yes, but only because it's your birthday...don't get it all of your head>>
Keonho burst out laughing against his chest, hugging him even tighter.
<<Of course...whatever you say love.>>
Juhoon didn't answer this time.
He definitely didn't have a ready answer like before.
He simply lowered his face and placed a kiss on his forehead before tucking the covers around them both.
<<Now sleep>>
Keonho smiled, too tired to continue teasing him, and a few minutes later, his breathing became regular.
Juhoon stayed awake for a while longer, still absentmindedly stroking his hair and watching the way Keonho snuggled against him, as if this place had always been his.
Well, in a way, it really was.
Juhoon placed one last kiss on his head before finally falling into a deep sleep himself.
୨୧┈୨୧
The next morning, Seonghyeon was the first to wake up.
For a few minutes he lay on his bed, still half asleep and tired, probably from the remark he'd made without even realizing it.
Then he turned to Martin, who was still sleeping soundly in his own bed.
Then Seonghyeon shifted his gaze to Keonho's bed and stopped.
There was no sign of the boy under the covers.
He squinted and rubbed his eyes.
Maybe his mind was playing tricks on him already at morning.
He opened his eyes again, and in any case, the situation hadn't changed.
<<What the hell...>>
Then, slowly, a thought crossed his mind.
A thought that, judging by his expression, might be the only plausible solution.
Seonghyeon got out of bed, retrieved his phone from the nightstand, and left the room, careful not to wake Martin.
He walked down the hall with light steps, stopping in front of James and Juhoon's bedroom door.
The door was a slightly open.
He pushed it open slightly, just enough to peek inside, and what he saw made him immediately raise a hand to his mouth to hide the amused smile that was creeping across his face.
Keonho was there in Juhoon's bed.
Cradled close to the older boy, his arm around his waist, his face completely hidden against his chest.
Juhoon, for his part, had an arm around his shoulders and seemed to be sleeping peacefully, completely unaware of everything that was happening outside.
Seonghyeon remained still in the doorway.
Then he slowly lowered his gaze to his phone and, without wasting a second, opened the camera, muting the sound and carefully approaching the bed.
He took a first photo.
Then a second, from a slightly different angle.
At the third, he had to hold back a laugh when he noticed that Keonho, even in his sleep, had moved even closer to Juhoon, burying his face in the crook of his neck.
He took another photo.
And another.
At that point, he already had enough material to torment them both for the rest of their lives, and honestly, he couldn't wait.