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Squad Leader Hange’s shrieks and cackles carry across the courtyard to where Armin makes his way to the mess hall for lunch.
Naturally, everyone in the Survey Corps is well aware of her eccentric and exuberant personality, Armin included, but initially he thinks this level of joy is unusual, even for her. Then, the morning’s affairs come back to him, and he remembers the low-stakes expedition Captain Levi and a small group of Scouts left for at dawn. Or it was meant to be low-stakes. Because if Hange is getting this worked up, titan-related research materials can’t be far.
He emerges into the central courtyard and finds the answer to his unspoken question. There, surrounded by Scouts and restrained by dozens of wires skewered into its steaming flesh is a 6-meter-class titan, sitting hunched over on the sandy ground.
Levi appears from the crowd, handing his horse’s reins to one of his subordinates, and strolls over to where Hange is shaking with excitement. At this point, her attention turns to him, although her gaze flits back to her new specimen every few seconds. He stands at an equally safe distance from her and the titan – whether to stop her launching herself at it or to protect himself from both of these threats, Armin isn’t quite sure. Perhaps a mix of the two.
“Leeeviii!” she very nearly squeals. “You caught me a titan?” Her flushed face is split in a beaming, manic smile, and despite its frenzied quality, Armin finds it sort of charming.
“No, I thought I’d go through the trouble of bringing it to headquarters to slaughter for a nice change of scenery,” Levi deadpans. “What the hell else would it be here for?”
Despite his harsh words, his tone is relatively unbothered, and his voice sounds almost soft in comparison to how he had been scolding Eren’s ‘disgraceful’ cleaning job just last week (Mikasa hadn’t much liked that).
Hange is back to scanning the titan from afar, for her fellow veteran holds out an arm to stop her getting too close each time she starts inching forward (“oi, four-eyes, not without your ODM gear”). Eventually, she gives up and just moves side-to-side, bouncing on her the balls of her feet and mumbling to herself all the while, the brightness in her eyes never dimming, and Levi simply watches.
Armin observes this interaction with morbid fascination. It sort of resembles a mating ritual, he realises with some horror. Yes, Hange is the one jumping up and down with glee as if trying to attract a partner with an elaborate dance, but even from this distance, Armin detects a glint of pride and satisfaction in Levi’s eyes. Their captain stands with his arms folded and an eyebrow cocked as he watches, but he doesn’t look disturbed or put-off. No, he actually appears to be standing a little straighter. Savouring the view, even. Clearly, he understands that his efforts hadn’t been in vain – no, the gift he is offering her is more than appreciated. He might as well be puffing his chest out like a bird.
Armin seems to realise the extent of Hange’s gratitude at the same time that Levi does, because both of their eyes widen just as she pounces on him.
Her arms lock him in a tight embrace, and she smushes her cheek against the top of his black hair. Levi reacts instantly, catching her before she sends them both toppling to the ground. Hange’s legs have kicked up off the ground and are bent upwards mid-air, and the entire display is pretty comical.
What’s better is the captain’s expression. His grey-blue eyes are still huge with shock for a moment before he sobers. His brows draw together in a scowl which Armin really doesn’t buy, because he hasn’t dropped her yet.
Alas, he does grumble out, “Tch, get off me you idiot. I’m covered in filth and you reek of sweat. Haven’t you bathed?” Armin thinks only the last part had any real feeling to it.
She finally slips out of his grasp, smiling in a considerably less deranged manner. Her boots thump the ground lightly as he releases her. “No, so I guess that makes two of us. And that’s not how you say, ‘You’re so welcome, Hange.’” She lowers her voice in a poor imitation of his.
“I didn’t hear a thank you.”
Her laughter rings out in the air. “You got me there. In that case, thank you, Levi dearest.” Hange holds her clasped hands to her cheek and shoots him saccharine smile. “How ever can I repay you?”
He tuts, shoving a hand into her face and angling his own away. His cheeks are dusted a light pink, and it contrasts with the glare he is giving the titan in lieu of Hange.
Feeling like he’s seen something he shouldn’t have, Armin hurriedly turns and walks to the mess hall, his superiors’ respective giggles and complaints following him all the way to the door.
The attempt at mating must have gone splendidly, because they now seem to be naming their first child together.
Armin is leaving the stables when the chaos sounding from the courtyard implores him to take the long walk back inside. The sky burns golden above them, and the setting sun casts shadows on everyone who has been roped into Hange’s titan studies. He recognises a few faces; some soldiers from her squad, her assistant, the mad scientist herself, and- Levi?
He grinds to a halt under the wooden canopy of the outdoor walkway. Indeed, their captain who Armin previously took to be completely indifferent to titan research is standing right in front of the subject and engaging in a heated discussion with its handler.
“But look at him! He has your eyes and-”
Levi glowers at her. “My eyes aren’t green, you oaf.”
Hange grins. “Yeah, but look at how his are always narrowed.” She points between the titan and Levi with both hands. Again, with the strange dance moves... “Identical!”
This bickering continues for a few moments until she finds another point to support her proposition, and she perks up with renewed vigour. “Ah, but you see, Levi, the two of you even have similar habits,” she says conspiratorially.
He only fixes her with a disbelieving stare. He’s losing, and he knows it.
Armin thinks he hears her say ‘watch this’ before she gestures to someone on her left. Her assistant steps forth with a spear (since when did they even have those?) and deposits it into her hands anxiously.
“Squad Leader, please be careful with that...”
“Don’t worry, Moblit. This one’s all bark, no bite,” she reassures him cheerily.
In the same instant that Hange lunges forth and Levi goes to snatch her back, her beloved titan proves her point. It jerks towards her slightly but doesn’t open its mouth. Instead, it emits a strange noise from between its teeth, a cross between a shh and a hiss.
A string of varied and colourful obscenities mingles with raving laughter to create a weirdly pleasant melody.
Levi probably isn’t done berating her for her recklessness when Hange interjects, still smiling: “Didn’t you hear? He has his own version of your little ‘tch’!” Her face twists into a drastically less venomous version of the captain’s signature glare as she mimics him.
For a split second, Levi’s mouth hangs open, eyes narrow with incredulity, which just sends her into another fit of giggles. Armin expects him to start spewing profanities at her, or even simply roll his eyes, but he just...stares. He isn’t gaping at her anymore, but his lips are parted ever so slightly, and his gaze is fixated entirely on her as her shoulders shake with amusement. If this weren’t humanity’s strongest soldier he was talking about, Armin might’ve gone so far as to say the man looked awestruck.
The moment passes as quickly as it had come. The odd shine in Levi’s eyes is gone, and from this distance, Armin just about hears him mutter something about how it sounded nothing like him.
Hange instantly catches onto how half-hearted the statement is. Her face lights up and she strikes the blunt end of her spear into the ground, turning to the titan. “Right then! It’s decided.”
A collective grumble from all those present reverberates in the air as if they’ve been through this countless times before. Armin sympathises with them – he’s figured out where this is headed.
“In honour of the extraordinary soldier who so kindly found me my new friend, you” –she points at the gangly creature with its blank, sleepy eyes and moronic grin– “shall be named Levi Junior.”
Armin finds himself fighting against the upticking of his lips. Amongst the crowd, some look to be in a similar state of desperately holding back a snicker in fear of the captain’s wrath, whilst others look utterly exasperated.
As for the man of the hour, Levi lets out a groan, curses under his breath, and pinches the bridge of his nose. Seems like he’s been forced to accept his defeat.
Hange starts calling out commands, completely ignoring his distress until she’s satisfied with the undergoing preparations, and then turns to him. “So? Isn’t it adorable?” she coos. “The name, I mean. Levi Junior is a he.”
Levi grimaces. "For all you know, that thing is older than Wall Rose.”
As Armin starts his trek back inside, he keeps an ear out for the rest of their conversation. Really, he needs the entertainment.
“Shall we name him Levi Senior, then?” she retorts pointedly.
“Don’t be ridiculous, four-eyes.” And then, quieter: “I’m the original.”
Hange snorts. “Oh, I know.” Suddenly, her tone shifts, and her voice drops a volume lower. “You’re still my favourite, though.”
Frankly, Armin can’t decipher how much of the remark was meant teasingly or genuinely, but nevertheless, it creates so tender and intimate a moment that he feels like an intruder even with his back to them. He wills his legs to move faster, face heating as he practically sprints away, and prays that he can forget it all in time for tomorrow morning's debriefing.