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2017-02-06
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Uchiha Sasuke Hated The Color Orange

Summary:

Sasuke hated three specific colors but at the same time, maybe he doesn't.

Notes:

So hello! This is the first work I post after years of hiatus. I started watching Naruto and I just fell in love with Sasuke and Naruto. I started this a few weeks ago because the idea kind of popped into my head but I just did not know how to start? Anyways, hopefully I will post another one soon. Please tell me what do you think.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Uchiha Sasuke hated the color orange. It reminded him of the walls in Orochimaru's hideout. The walls did not just triggered one or two memories. Perhaps if that was the case he could have felt indifference towards the sunset, burning fire color but no, it didn’t. The color grabbed the whole picture. The hours he spend trying to sleep, trying to suppress the tears, the exhaustion, the loneliness, the anger. It reminded him of how the hours of training left him with awful bruises, cuts and even there were times when a bone or two or more would be broken. As if the color itself was pressing against the open wounds and of how this, the blood and the soreness, would only be fixed by Kabuto and a couple of pain killers and he would do it all over again. The birds' chirping in his jutsu turned into a piercing screeching, going through his ears, until he was sure that his ears, in any moment would just start to bleed. The thought making him flinch but forced to continue. Through sweat and heavy pants, he would glance at one of these horrible walls. The four walls surrounding him each day for years. The walls coming closer each day in a suffocating, enclosing way. Each day was harder to breathe, it was harder to see, and it was harder to continue. Deep down he knew he had to do this. He had to find a way to breathe, he had to find a way to see and he had to find a way to continue living within these walls. If he wanted what he had been trying to do since he was 12, even younger. The space between Itachi and him was far too great and the only way to burst his anger and hatred was buried with the venom of snakes with a pale skinned, dark haired man. Within the orange walls.

Uchiha Sasuke hated the color blue. It reminded him of the color of that lake he used to visit almost every day when he was a kid. It despised it. Of how miserable he felt when his reflection would appear. Just to remind him of who he was. He would see how 'Uchiha Sasuke' would be there above the water, the image moving along the couple of ripples the wind would make but never messing the image. He wished the wind could hear and his wished would be granted and the wind would blow and mess the image until it was unrecognizable, and the pain would disappear but he knew the wind was deaf and would only caress Sasuke’s face like if it was smiling at him and it would whisper that he couldn’t do that. Sasuke stopped hoping and then one day he would grab a couple of rocks and sticks he would find in the way and he would walk down the dock until he got to the edge and he would sit down, hanging his legs with his feet almost touching the water. He would look down and see a boy with black hair with dark clothes. He would stare a bit longer and he would see his mother eyes and his father's hair, a bit longer and he would see his brother's smile and his brother's laugh, he would see his cousins, his aunts, his uncles, he would see everything and everyone and just as that, like a blink and a small time in space with the burst in deep blood red, they would disappear. He was left with the image of a boy with black hair and dark clothes with squinted eyes, with gritted teeth, with a pained expression and tears falling down his cheeks. In that moment, he would throw a rock, making the waves blur the image beneath. This would happen repeatedly. The image would keep appearing and Sasuke would still throw a rock. Again and again and when he was out of rocks he would throw a stick and when he was out of sticks, he would slowly get up and go home. Sasuke would walk down the same path every day. He thought that maybe this was helping in a way. He would just throw rock after rock, seeing them sink farther and farther down. Perhaps he thought the rocks were his memories. Perhaps he thought the rocks were his sadness and pain but mostly he thought the rocks were him.

Uchiha Sasuke hated the color yellow. The brightness of the color itself, the value some people would associate it with, the warmth or the fact that he would see it anywhere he would go. These may not seem like a proper excuse to hate the color but in fact they were. Because every time he would hear the word “warmth” he would start to feel it. He would start to feel the soft and pleasing feeling caressing his skin, wrapping his body into a blanket in winter or the emotions it would arise from the bottom of his chest. But that wouldn’t be the worst the color would remind him of. It was because every time he would close his eyes, we could feel the light in his skin, coming from an open window. Then he would listen to his mother telling him to wake up while she finishes to scatter the curtains and letting the sun through. Sasuke would answer with a growl while throwing the blanket over his head. His mother would repeatedly say that it was time to wake up or threatening him by calling his father but the only thing that would make him get out of bed was the mention of a new training day with Itachi. He would hesitate no more as he would jump out of bed and get himself dressed. Obviously with the help of his mother, who would help his 6-year-old self while laughing, a reaction to her plan being successful. He would run towards the exit, waving a small goodbye to his father and mother as he would meet with his brother at the door. Itachi would grin and ask him if he was ready. Sasuke would smile him back and nod while Itachi opened the door to let the sunlight in.

However even if with the painful memory wasn’t enough to hate and despise the color. He just hated it. It was just plain obnoxious. It was almost too bright making his head spin to the point he wanted to throw up. He just hated it. He hated the brightness, the energy, the intensity, the vitality, the loudness, the frustration, the dumbness, the persistence, the stubbornness, the cheerfulness, the hyperactive idiot. How could someone be that cheerful all the time? Wasn't there a time of the day when he would stay still? Even if it was just a minute? Just thinking about him made his head hurt so much.

...

Wait.

Someone?

… Him?

Why was Sasuke suddenly thinking about someone? And more importantly, why was Sasuke thinking about HIM?

Yes, it was true that Sasuke’s head would make the connection between him and the color yellow but that did not mean he would just do it. Yes, the hair color of that idiot was yellow but other than that there was no reason for him to let his mind wander and connect the dots and make relations between them. Although, it was more than that. He never wanted to admit it but the truth was there was more. Yes, the hyperactivity of the color, the brightness, the energy, and the warmth was all connected with Naruto. There wasn’t a time when the boy would just stay still. Even though the mission would require them to, he would just start to ramble about the enemy, or the instructions, or whatever other little thing someone could ever pick to ramble about. Even one time during a C Rank mission, the enemy just gave up and let himself be caught just to get away from Naruto’s screams and lectures. The man would let himself be handcuffed, with Naruto still talking and he would just turn to look at Sasuke with this look that Sasuke assumed was “how in the world does he talk so much?” but now looking it in a different way, perhaps because he could remember the man’s eyes and they would have a sparkle of admiration, almost invisible, that Sasuke could easily brush off as something unimportant at that time but now he realized the man’s question. The previous one had been a bit accurate but the complete one was “how in the world do you tolerate this?” Even though he would guess correctly at that time the enemy’s question, he wouldn’t really have a good answer. Or maybe he did but he was way too proud to admit it. Or maybe he didn’t tolerate it but he did accept it because it wasn’t someone’s ramble, it was Naruto’s and he accepted him. Why? He did not know. It was just that. And now, the color yellow seemed less bad because he realized he could just accept it too.

Thinking about accepting colors seemed like a waste of time. It wasn’t something that required this amount of thought while he could just swipe it away like dust but the bothering thought of the same acceptance towards the color orange would make Sasuke be hesitant about dropping the subject. There was no way he would just forget about it. He wouldn’t just “swipe” the pain and sweat it brought along with it. Remembering was hard but forgetting was harder. Just as he was trying so hard to suppress the flashing images, he would suddenly stop and let one stay. He let the memory continue and then he would find himself on that edge, looking down. He would only focus on the person right below. He couldn’t really see their face but he knew their eyes were locked, staring and hoping they would search and find something, anything, for a question they both wanted to answer. The question “why?” would keep repeating inside, in a constant manner. Sasuke would stop asking and he would just look at Naruto. He certainly grew up. He looked almost the same and almost because he just knew the idiot was still an idiot but the thought did not bother him. His clothes changed. The orange and blue suit was replaced by black and…orange one. What was Naruto’s deal with keeping the orange in him? Sasuke was probably exaggerating by asking such incredulous questions. He just grew up and changed. That was it. He knew he had to go before something else would happen but just as he knew it, just as he could think about it, he was there beside him. He wouldn’t really call it a provocation because he didn’t feel bothered at the time but he was there, with a hand resting on Naruto’s shoulder. His mind could’ve fooled him but he suddenly felt…relieved? Yes, Naruto was a bit taller, he felt more powerful than what he remembered but he was there. After all these years, he was there, Sasuke was there and it felt right. Perhaps this was the reason the thought of Naruto changing wasn’t completely true because he was here. He was there and Sasuke felt relieved because Naruto did not change. He was still the idiot that thought he could bring him back with just words and maybe if it didn’t work, which it did not, a few punches would be exchanged that it didn’t work either because Sasuke’s power was greater. Just as he would disappear through the burning flames along with Kabuto and Orochimaru, he would keep staring at the boy and he would catch how Naruto’s face would make a horrid expression. His teeth would be pressed against each other, his eyes would reflect terror, disappointment and sadness. Even though Naruto was pained, Sasuke would recognize that in that time he still felt relieved. Just as the scenery would vanish along the flames, the orange reflected within them would make Sasuke make a small smile, perhaps too small to be called small. As the memory would come to an end, Sasuke would be finding himself smiling. Naruto was still an idiot after all. Perhaps the color orange suited him and perhaps that is the reason why he wore it all the time and perhaps it wasn’t just as bad as Sasuke could remember because if the color was there then perhaps Naruto would be there too.

And now that more than a few dots were linked, the color blue was easily pinpointed to one and one thing only. Naruto’s eyes, full of every possible emotion you could ever name. Every time that Sasuke had to face him, he would stare at those eyes and for a moment he would be afraid that maybe they could make him say everything Naruto wanted to know. He was afraid that at the time he was trying to figure Naruto out, Naruto would reverse his strategy and find things about himself. He was still amazed of how could someone that did not have any clan trait like the byakugan or the sharingan could cause so much doubt, fear, surprise and stability within Sasuke. Or with anyone else, really. Naruto was known for having an enormous strength involving bonds, making people like him, making people believe in him, something that Sasuke has always failed to do. But he knew what Naruto had and why he was the only one that could reach Sasuke. Naruto’s eyes filled the loneliness with empathy, covered his pain with devotion, and replaced his hatred with forgiveness. Although the last one would be a bit inaccurate. Maybe “with understanding” would be better. In any case, even though the color blue would trigger the lake of his childhood, the heartache of the desolation the loss of his family created, came along with the sky above with a few clouds diffused, the sunlight glistening along the water surface and Naruto’s eyes watching him from the road behind.

So yes maybe the color blue or orange or yellow or all of them may hold things that he hates, dispises and regrets but with Naruto matching into every single one of them, the thoughts and memories wouldn't hurt that much and the colors wouldn't be that bad all the time. Maybe not at all. 

Notes:

Thank you so much for reading. If you could please give me some feedback, comments, advice that would be lovely.
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