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[unknown number] guuuueeeeeeeesssss whaaaaattttt
[unknown number] sent you a picture: newcat.jpg
[unknown number] I finally got the cat! Her name's Juniberry and I brought her home today and she's so shy and nervous but I already love her soooo much!
[you] OH MY GOODNESS THAT IS THE CUTEST CAT I'VE EVER SEEN. She is adorable! Is she a rescue cat?
[you] Also… you have the wrong number
[unknown number] oh gosh I'm so sorry!
[unknown number] and yeah, she's a rescue cat. How did you know?
[you] I used to work at the Voltron Cat Shelter so I recognise the tag on her collar
[you] if it's not obvious I love cats so… feel free to send as many cat pictures as you want
[unknown number] wow that's so weird that I texted you by mistake and you worked at the exact same shelter?!?
[unknown number] *x-files music plays in the background*
[you] ha! Just a weird coincidence I guess
[you] don't worry about the cat being shy she'll warm up to you soon enough
[you] sent a picture: soot.jpg
[you] this is Soot. I adopted him when I worked at the shelter. He spent three weeks hiding under the bed but now he won't leave me alone
[unknown number] aaawww cute! Well I'm glad you like random cat pics from strangers lol
[unknown number] thanks for the tips. anyway I'll stop bothering you, sorry!
[you] it's okay you weren't bothering me. So I guess… thanks for the cat pic? :)
[unknown number] you're welcome weird cat stranger!
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[you] you coming in today? My physio got moved to 3 so you'll have to come after 5
[you] wait… sorry! I texted you by mistake, I was trying to text my brother and your chat popped up first
[weird cat stranger] hey it's okay
[weird cat stranger] good luck with your physio!
[you] thanks :)
[you] good luck with the cat lol
[weird cat stranger] sent you a picture: juniberry.jpg
[weird cat stranger] she's getting along great
[weird cat stranger] I know you like cat pics lol
[you] cute!
[you] and yeah I do love those cat pics
[weird cat stranger] I have you saved in my phone as 'weird cat stranger' just fyi
[you] it's weird cos… I have u saved under the same name lol
[weird cat stranger] uuuummmmmm what?!? Lol I don't believe you
[weird cat stranger] pics or it didn't happen
[you] sent a screenshot: proof.jpg
[you] there ya go weird cat stranger
[weird cat stranger] sent you a screenshot: samesies.jpg
[weird cat stranger] oh snap! Lol
[weird cat stranger] this is so wild I have to tell all my friends
[you] fine but… please don't make me out to be a weirdo. I'm actually a pretty normal dude
[weird cat stranger] righttttttttt… I'll have to take your word for it
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[weird cat stranger] I know this is a bit out of the blue but… can I ask you a cat-related question
[you] yeah sure
[weird cat stranger] Juniberry doesn't like my brother. She gets skittish whenever he's in the room and tries to scratch him. Whenever he tries to pet her or play with her she starts howling
[weird cat stranger] any ideas for how to win a cat's trust?
[you] yeah the trick with cats is the same as the trick for kids. You gotta be patient and let the cat come to you. Sit still and be neutral, let the cat get comfortable around you. She'll approach you when she's ready, in the meantime tell your brother to try and sit still and quiet around her until she learns to trust him
[weird cat stranger] oh Lord this is gonna be a nightmare
[weird cat stranger] my brother CANNOT sit still
[you] well you can try bribing Juniberry with food but honestly the best way is to let the cat come to you on her own terms
[weird cat stranger] ugh I'll try. Thanks for the advice
[you] yeah sure. Let me know how it goes
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[weird cat stranger] IT'S WORKING. JUNIBERRY TRUSTS MY BROTHER
[you] oh great! Glad it worked!
[weird cat stranger] are you some kind of cat whisperer or something? How did you know it would work?
[you] well I did work in a cat shelter. Plus it's just kind of intuitive if you think about it
[you] lots of people rush in because the cat is cute and they want to pet it and pick it up. But from the cat's point of view a weird strange person is just invading their personal space.
[weird cat stranger] wow… I was kidding but… you really ARE a cat whisperer
[you] if you wanna put it like that lol
[weird cat stranger] I'm changing your name in my phone to 'Cat Whisperer'
[you] well it's better than weird cat stranger so… I'll take it
[weird cat stranger] you saved ME as 'weird cat stranger'
[you] lol should I change it? I'll just call you Juniberry's mom
[weird cat stranger] if you're gonna change it put my actual name
[weird cat stranger] it's Allura
[you] if we're exchanging names then you can save me as Shiro
[weird cat stranger] oh no I like the name Cat Whisperer way too much I'm keeping it
[you] great…
[weird cat stranger] how come you always reply to my messages so quickly? Don't you have a job? Or a life?
[you] not at the moment
[you] I'm actually in hospital
[weird cat stranger] wait really? Omg are you okay?
[weird cat stranger] well I mean… obviously you're not okay you're in hospital. Sorry that was insensitive of me
[you] no it's okay. I was riding my bike and I got hit by a lorry. I'm in hospital recovering
[you] that's… actually why I was pretty glad you texted me. I don't get a lot of visitors and I spend most of my time doing rehab and watching TV. It gets pretty boring after a while
[weird cat stranger] wow I'm so sorry. I'm glad I could help brighten your day lol
[weird cat stranger] if you ever want any more cat pics let me know :)
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[Allura] are you a weird stalker or something?
[you] uuuuummmmmmm…
[Allura] I told my stepdad about you and he freaked out
[Allura] are you catfishing me?
[you] no lol. I swear I am literally just a normal dude who knows a lot about cats
[Allura] I'm not sure if I should trust you
[you] well… you don't have to. You can delete my number and we never have to talk again
[Allura] what if I need your cat whispering powers?
[you] are you really worried?
[you] my name's Takashi Shirogane but everyone calls me Shiro. I'm 25. Before I got side-swiped by a lorry I was a bike messenger. If you go to Kerberos Couriers on 82nd street they'll tell you I'm for real
[you] I swear I'm not a weird stalker
[Allura] sorry. I just don't really know anything about you
[you] well I don't know anything about you either. I know more about your cat than I do about you
[Allura] fair enough. Okay here goes: my name's Allura Prince, I'm 26, I work at a charity called Altean Aid that supports grassroots projects in developing countries
[you] it's nice to meet you
[you] well… not 'meet' but… you get what I'm saying
[Allura] yeah lol
[you] if you go by the delivery shop ask for Matt Holt, he knows me best he'll tell you I'm legit
[Allura] it's okay I trust you
[you] you don't have to talk to me if you feel uncomfortable. I won't mind if you check my alibi lol
[you] obviously… I can't really check yours cos I'm stuck in a hospital bed and it's hard to snoop from in here so…
[Allura] you realise *I* could be catfishing *you*
[you] I'm honestly so bored I think I'd go along with it just for something to do
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[you] hey
[Allura] hey
[you] I am very bored please tell me you have an exciting cat update
[you] I honestly don't care if you're a creepy old dude at this point I just want someone to talk to
[Allura] Juniberry will sleep on my bed now
[Allura] you wanna see a pic?
[you] YES PLEASE I LIVE FOR CAT PICS
[Allura] sent you a picture: Juniberrysleeping.jpg
[you] UGH I'M DYING WITH HOW CUTE SHE IS LOOK AT THOSE LIL PAWS
[Allura] are you sure you're a grown man?
[you] honestly? No
[Allura] whoever you are you're funny
[Allura] sent you a picture: mysmolfluffball.jpg
[you] wait… who's that in the picture with Juniberry?
[Allura] that's me lol. Well half my face
[you] wow… you look so pretty
[you] you look really nice
[you] you're… you're cute
[Allura] that bad, huh? I can see you typing a message lol
[you] nooooooo lol I'm just… okay I'm trying to find a way to tell you how nice you look without coming across as creepy
[you] I mean you look like a nice person
[you] sorry I'll shut up now
[Allura] haha no you don't have to. Thanks for saying I look nice
[Allura] it's probably cos the pic's so blurry you can't see my face properly
[you] so send me a good pic and I'll update my opinion lol
[Allura] sent you a picture: whatismyface.jpg
[you] you're really pretty
[you] I can see you typing lol just say something
[Allura] I'm tryna act like I know I'm pretty but I'm lowkey really flattered that you like my pic
[Allura] okay your turn
[you] okay well I don't have any photos of me after the accident but I can send you an older pic hang on
[you] sent a picture: goosehilltrailday.jpg
[you] I rode up Goose Hill Trail with some friends of mine and I took this picture at the top with my brother. He's the sulky-looking kid in the red jacket
[Allura] you look really sweet
[you] lol you can't tell that from a pic
[Allura] yeah I can you have your brother in a headlock and you're laughing. You look sweet that's my opinion of you
[Allura] anyway I already know you worked in a cat shelter as a cat whisperer so this just confirms my opinion of you as a huge softie
[you] I didn't work as a cat whisperer! That's not a real job
[Allura] it should be
[you] true
[you] I should tell you though… I look a bit different after the accident
[Allura] different like how?
[you] well I have a huge scar over the bridge of my nose
[you] plus I lost my right arm
[Allura] wait you lost your arm?
[Allura] omg Shiro I'm so sorry. I didn't realise your accident was that bad
[you] yeah it was pretty spectacular
[you] I haven't actually taken a picture of myself since because I look so different
[Allura] I can understand that. It must be really weird
[you] yeah it is. The scar is not so bad but when I look in the mirror I expect to see an arm and it's not there. I just don't look like myself anymore
[you] I'm right-handed as well so now I can't do anything. I have to learn to do everything with my left hand. I can't even write
[Allura] Can I… make a weird suggestion?
[you] Go for it
[Allura] It sounds odd but… maybe taking selfies would help?
[Allura] I don't tell people this a lot but… Most of the girls in my school were white and there was this group of them who used to call me ugly and disgusting all the time. I had a pretty rough time of it but what really helped was taking pictures of myself
[Allura] I know it seems a bit counterintuitive, but when you take a picture of yourself you control the image. So you can see yourself how you want to be seen and not how others see you. When I started taking pictures of myself I started to feel like those girls were wrong and that I could be pretty and look good. I liked how I looked and it didn't matter what anyone else thought of me
[Allura] I dunno tell me to shut up this is all garbage
[you] no no this actually makes a lot of sense
[Allura] like… you can reclaim your image of yourself if you take a selfie and say 'this is me, this is who I am'
[Allura] like sure I have dark skin and maybe that's not seen as 'beautiful' by some people but if I can take a picture of myself and look at it and think 'wow I look so pretty' I feel like I can reclaim that narrative about myself. I'm not ugly even if I don't fit society's narrow definition of beauty
[you] Allura you are definitely not ugly. But also you are making a really good point and I didn't think of it this way
[you] I think my problem is that I've always been very active. I used to work out and my body has never let me down. Until the accident. And now my arm is literally just gone and I suddenly feel really fragile
[you] ugh I'm terrible at this does that even make sense?
[Allura] yeah of course it does
[you] so like… because I see myself as so athletic and physical I have a hard time seeing myself as the guy without the arm
[Allura] yeah I get that
[Allura] so maybe you could… I dunno, just take a picture of yourself where you still look like a physical athletic person. If that makes sense? If you can look at the picture and think 'I'm still that same active guy' then maybe you can like… see yourself as still being that guy even if you're missing an arm
[Allura] I am trying to be supportive but I don't know if it's working or if I'm talking nonsense
[you] no this is really helpful actually. Because I see what you mean.
[you] ever since the accident I have avoided taking pictures of myself or looking at myself because I can't see myself the same way I used to. I feel like I'm a completely different person now
[Allura] I don't think you are though?
[Allura] I mean obviously you are facing some challenges but you can still be an athletic and active person even after your injury
[Allura] plus if all else fails you can always be a one-armed cat whisperer
[you] ha! I should ask them to make my prosthetic cat-friendly
[you] I'll get a cat toy instead of a hand
[Allura] see if they can install a laser pointer in your finger or something
[you] loooollllll
[you] i would be the ultimate cat whisperer
[Allura] I'm glad to see you're finally accepting your identity as the cat whisperer
[you] Allura can I ask you a weird favour?
[Allura] sure
[you] can I send you a selfie? I wanna try this reclaiming your image thing
[Allura] yeah go for it
[you] sent a picture: thecatwhisperer.jpg
[you] it took me five minutes to take this but I sorta don't hate it
[Allura] I like it! You caught your good side. And you still look really sweet.
[you] the scar is sorta growing on me
[Allura] it makes you look really dashing
[Allura] also you could make up all sorts of interesting stories about how you got it
[you] I'm gonna tell people I'm a pirate
[Allura] ha! They'd probably believe it
[you] ugh hang on the nurse just came round and told me to turn the lights out
[Allura] why?
[you] it's like 2am
[Allura] WHAT? OMG I have work in the morning
[you] sorry!
[Allura] nah don't be sorry. I actually really enjoy talking to you
[you] yeah same
[you] thanks for the advice and everything. It was really helpful
[Allura] no problem. Chat soon?
[you] you bet
[you] goodnight
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