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Die With the Sun, Live Like the Moon

Chapter 5: Not a full/proper chapter, please read the notes!

Notes:

PLEASE READ!

Hello. 😅 It’s been *looks at sundial* 2 years? Oh my. Okay so here’s what happened. (I’ll put a TLDR at the bottom). Around the time that I was preparing to write the last chapter of this fic, there were also a couple fic exchanges that others were relying on me for. There was also some mentally taxing stuff happening in real life, and I put a ton of pressure on myself and got totally burned out in terms of writing. So I planned to take a short break, maybe a couple months. But that turned into writer’s block. Combined with the fact that I’ve never been good with the recovery/wrap up/conclusions of fics (my brain turns off after the angst/whump/action stops), I struggled quite a bit to get anything at all out. I managed a little, which is what I’m going to share here. Around the same time, I began playing and got really into Genshin Impact (video game), and that quickly took over my mind and thoughts and whatever creative juices were still clinging to life in my noggin. And before I could even consider going back to Irondad writing, No Way Home came out, and I was devastated. I know it’s all fictional, I know it’s silly, but I got so depressed with how they left Peter. I couldn’t even think about it (still can’t even watch clips from the movie, and probably won’t ever watch it again) without getting seriously depressed. So I completely turned away from thinking about anything Spider-Man or even MCU related. I can make myself depressed all by myself thank you, I don’t need more piling on.

TLDR: Got burned out, got really into a video game, No Way Home fricked me up.

So that’s about it. But like I said, I did manage to get a little bit written. It never seriously occurred to me that I could post what little I had, I felt it would just look lazy. And honestly I was ashamed, I’m always disappointed when I come across an unfinished fic and here I am doing it myself. But a big thank you to Lexilooper, who encouraged me to do this. A little something is better than nothing, maybe?

So what I have here is basically just a few paragraphs that were properly written as well as a summary/outline of how I planned to conclude this story. It’s a little all over the place. Please accept my deepest apologies for ending it this way! 🙏🏻

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Tony had never been so grateful to see someone pass out as he was when Peter finally went limp in his arms. Happy immediately retreated to get the medical team, leaving Tony alone with his battered and broken protègè. He pulled the boy close and just held on, indescribably grateful that he was finally able to do more than merely stand at a distance, hoping his words would be enough. For several long minutes, the only sound he registered in the crumbled mess of a room was Peter’s breathing. Each strained inhale eased a few more knots in Tony’s stomach, each exhale sapping a little more of his fear away.

 

This close, he couldn’t avoid the burnt-flesh smell of Peter’s shoulder.

 

“I’m so sorry,” he whispered. His voice cracked, but there was no one there to hear it but him. 

 

___________________




Peter spent two and a half days in the compound’s medbay - his longest stay to date. The first morning was, as expected, the worst. He woke in pain and it took some time for the doctors to work out an appropriate dosage and combination of painkillers that would work with his metabolism. He was treated to a series of tests and procedures that mostly blended together in his memory - MRI’s, CT scans, X-rays, and a few other bizarre tests that in retrospect may have been drug-induced dreams. 

 

May appeared by his side at some point and never left, comforting him with forehead kisses and linking their fingers together whenever he was awake. He saw Tony once that first day when he was still mostly out of it, the man carefully ruffling his hair and assuring him he would return. 

 

He slept as much as possible, knowing that it would help his healing ability to do its work. He couldn’t move much anyway, when all was said and done. His left arm was in a sling, wrist in a cast. His entire right arm and shoulder were covered in some sort of gooey salve and wrapped in gauze, with a frankly futuristic and fancy-looking brace over his wrist to keep it from moving without putting too much pressure on the burns underneath. The gashes in his leg were stitched up nicely, and thankfully there was no serious damage done to his neck other than deep bruising and inflammation, though he was still advised not to move his head too much. 

 

The second day was far better. His lighter cuts, bruises and burns had healed completely overnight and the more serious damage was making good progress. 

 

Happy came to visit him just after lunch, while May was on a trip back to the apartment to get some clean clothes for Peter for when he was ready to go home. 

 

“You look ridiculous,” Happy said upon entering, his gaze roaming briefly over Peter’s many bandages and healing contraptions. “But better than you did two nights ago, so I’ll take it.”

 

Peter narrowed his eyes at the man but couldn’t help the small smile that pulled at his lips. “Hello, Happy.”

 

Happy pulled up the plastic chair that May had previously occupied and settled down into it, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees. “How’re you doing?” he asked, staring at Peter straight on with an open and genuine interest that Peter wasn’t quite used to getting from him. 

 

“I’m doing okay,” Peter reassured with a quick nod. “Better today. Nothing really hurts anymore.”

 

“They got the meds figured out okay then?”

 

“Yeah,” he said, then glanced around the room and heaved a big sigh. “I’m starting to get bored though. All I can do is sit here and watch tv. I can’t text or use my phone or anything. I can’t even change the channel by myself!”

 

“That’s what you want to complain about? After what the past two days have been like?” Happy looked at the wall-mounted television where The Golden Girls was playing. “I can change it if you want. I'm only going to do it once, though, I’m not your orderly. So pick something you-“

 

“No!” Peter exclaimed, then cleared his throat in an attempt to sound more casual. “I mean no, this show is fine, I guess.”

 

Happy raised an eyebrow but surprisingly didn’t tease him any further. “Alright. Well, Tony wanted to be here himself,” he said instead, leaning back in his chair. “But he’s been running some sort of deep diagnostic overhaul—or whatever he called it—on FRIDAY. Wants to make sure no other suits will be hacked before they can find the asses behind everything. He’s right at the front lines of the investigation too, along with SHIELD and Fury -who was already pissed at him for taking off to see you yesterday- so I’m here instead.”

 

Peter wiggled his toes and drew up his good leg, one of the only movements he could do freely without fear of damaging anything. “Is he… okay?” he asked, memories of the heartbreak he’d seen on his mentor’s face ever at the forefront of his mind. “You know. With everything?” 

 

Happy gave a small, noncommittal shrug. “I mean… he’s a little all over the place. There’s a lot happening right now so he probably hasn’t had much time to think. But he's worried about you. Had your doctors sending him updates on your progress all yesterday.”

 

Peter’s cheeks warmed and he wiggled his toes again. “Have they found anything yet? Do they know who did it?”

 

“Well,” Happy started, smoothing his tie down absentmindedly, “that’s another reason I’m here. Do you know the name Phineas Mason?”

 

Peter searched his memory, forehead scrunching. “Uh… I don’t think so. Am I supposed to?”

 

“He worked with the Vulture; he was the one that was actually behind most of his tech. He designed those wings; he put together almost everything Toomes used.”

 

“Oh,” Peter replied quietly, not yet sure what else to say. He’d never really thought much about the Vulture’s partners. He knew there were others working for him, but after Toomes was arrested the whole operation was taken over by SHIELD and Peter was told to stay out of it. “Was he not arrested? Like at the same time as Toomes?” 

 

Happy shook his head regretfully. “Apparently not. A few guys slipped through SHIELD’s fingers when they were trying to dismantle Toomes’ group, and Mason was one of them. We don’t have all the details yet, but I guess his life got real rough when he went on the run and he’s been blaming you ever since. So when he was offered an opportunity for payback, he took it.”

 

“Offered by who?”



(Justin Hammer)



_______________________



Recovery process overview

Tony is in and out - more than busy dealing with shield and helping them discover and track down the people who did it (Justin hammer and phineas mason), trying to find out if any sensitive information got out and what to do about it, does a deep search/overhaul with Friday 

Peter is fine with it, it gives him time to process what happened

Maybe Happy visits him? Let’s him know how Tony is doing and what he’s doing

Jump forward to when Peter starts patrolling again

Tony flies out to meet with him in his backup suit/previous model, brings tacos from the place Peter likes, the ones that he’d offered “Tony” on the roof and never got to eat.

He tells Peter he’s on his way but even so when he gets there the place is empty. He says “helmet’s down, kid”, and Peter peeks up from over the side of the building to be sure, and upon seeing Tony’s face comes out sheepishly and apologetic. 

They eat together, have first real/lengthy conversation since what happened. 

Tony tells him who it was and what happened to them

Tony apologizes - his fault for everything especially for not telling Peter how much he means to him before. 

Then he does tell Peter how he feels, wants to make sure he knows, even if it’s awkward. 

(“What I’m trying to say, I think- is that I’m sorry. All of this is my fault.” He glanced briefly at the sky before resting his gaze on Peter. “It’s my fault the suit got hacked, it’s my fault they found you…” He shook his head in self-reproach and dropped his eyes again. “And it’s my fault that everything they said was so believable. If I had been better with you, if I had treated you better…”)

Peter feels guilty/sorry for believing the suit. It just didn’t occur to him that anything of Tony’s could be hacked that badly

Tony asks Peter if he’ll help him rebuild the suit, but better. I.e. the next model. Says he reworked Friday (one of the first things he did) but asks if Peter would double check to make sure he didn’t miss anything (both will hopefully help Peter feel more safe)

 

Extra: Tony asks about his Spidey sense; wouldn’t he have anticipated the punch coming? Peter says he did feel vague anxiety but attributed it to some local general crime. Not once did it occur to him that it would come from Tony. Sense doesn’t always work quite right so he thought it was somehow misfiring.

 

Notes:

Yeah. 😬 Again, I'm so sorry. I can't say I'll never come back to rewrite this ending properly, but it is very unlikely. This was one of my favorite fics to write, and I'm pissed at myself for ending it this way. I'm so sorry that this is all I can offer. I do hope everyone that reads this is doing well and takes care of themselves! And once more, thank you Lexilooper 💖 for always being such an uplifting little bean with the best comments, and for encouraging me to post this. (And hello to Lexilooper's sister 🥰👋)

Notes:

Okay. Thank you for reading! Let me know your thoughts, I love feedback! Kudos and comments butter my bread. I'll get the next part up as soon as I can!

Much love to you! (yes, you) <3

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