Chapter Text
Not everyone was that lucky…
Koushi ran down the street, eyes pried open. His heart was skipping beats, the wind smashing him in the face as he ran. The darkness felt ominous, almost like the lights that flashed angrily right behind him. The only thing on his mind was whether or not they caught a good look at him, he wasn’t the most obvious man, but he never really had a character that blended easily into the crowd. That’s why he had a habit of going out under the cover of the suffocating night, getting himself into a heap of trouble, it was only a matter of time before he ruined his own life, wasn’t it?
He quickly turned into an alley, gritting his teeth as his feet slipped partially, Koushi managed to stop himself by hitting the side of the wall with his back, making sure the small bundle he carried in his arms was safe. Koushi didn’t have time to think though, his eyes refocusing on the police lights that had been chasing him. He cursed himself mentally, taking in a deep breath before running down the small corridor of windows and turning out onto another street. Had this been an important splice, Koushi figured there would be more than a few officers chasing after him. He almost felt fortunate for that, he didn’t tell Daichi that he was going out.
He hardly ever felt that was necessary, especially for his late night escapades.
Koushi felt the small creature claw quietly at his shirt, and his eyes turned downward to give it a look over. He watched as it moved it’s mouth, something unpleasant probably coming from it. Lips pursed as he kept himself light on his feet, ignoring the hair whipping into eyes, pressing the small being closer to him. Koushi repeated what he remembered his mother did, pushing out a “Shush” like sound past his lips, as awkward as it might have sounded.
“I will–keep you–safe,” He mouthed, voice hardly audible from the lack of practice.
Talking was hard for someone who couldn’t hear himself, but Koushi tried anyway. It only mattered that it worked, the tiny bird like entity looking up at him with glowing eyes before snuggling into his chest. A sign of comfort, even in the face of potential capture. That was enough to keep Koushi going, for his legs to become stronger. His strides were practically leaps, his body pushing beyond the limits that he had trained himself to achieve. Koushi jumped onto one of the nearby ledges, landing harshly but he continued running, his muscles singing from the jolts of pain.
Every breath he took was hard, cold, like the sweat running down his forehead as he kept running. His diaphragm wasn’t moving fast enough, his body wasn’t moving fast enough. The extraction point was coming up quickly, and the lights were back on him again. Koushi figured that if he focused too much on them, he’d be unable to run faster, he wouldn’t reach his top speed. So he tightened his old on the frightened hatch-ling, gritting his teeth as he increased speed again.
Daichi had a habit of making fun of Koushi for his lack of athleticism, saying that if he didn’t get any he wouldn’t be able to survive in life. Daichi had been into sports from the moment he was born, Koushi hypothesized, something he would bring up as a jab at his childhood friend. They were polar opposites in so many ways, but he was sure that if Daichi saw him now, he’d see that Koushi may not have run before. He may not have explored his world, he may not have been the most adventurous individual, but that was because he hadn’t found his calling.
As he turned the corner and continued at a breakneck pace, Koushi knew what he had found was a calling that he had been born to answer. These creatures, he saw a lot of himself in them. Quiet, unwilling to do more than they had to to survive. This little child that would have been tortured had he let them keep it, and he himself–he would have been tortured if he continued letting people do it to him. Koushi could not speak normally, he could not hear from the moment he was born and was thought of as different. He wasn’t the strongest, nor the fastest, but he knew what it was like to be put down.
Daichi knew what it was like for him to cope with the events that lead him to run away, and stay with a family that not only treated him as their own, but loved him as their own.
These beautiful creatures, like he, had to be free. Free of the strife that had entrapped them, and he would die for that cause. He would die for the small bundle he held in his arms. He didn’t consider himself a martyr, or anyone of particular importance. He was just a man, a young man who wanted to do something useful with his life, with his unwillingness to give up and fight tooth and nail for what he believed him. Someone so fortunate to have someone like Daichi to support every move he made.
Those were the things that kept him running, that kept him going until his body screamed.
Koushi swerved violently, almost falling into the street before heading down a small cut off passage. The lights were dim, but they were behind him. That was all that mattered to him as he watched a small hole come into his hazy vision. He let a weary smile come over him, closing his eyes before jumping into the air, almost curling himself around the young creature he was carrying in his arms. The air shifted directions as he fell down the small tube, eyes opening in time to watch the hole disappear. Koushi shifted his attention then, bracing his body for the impact he’d have with the ground once he landed.
His feet touched, and then his legs, and then his entire body. He didn’t have the energy to stay bent at the balls of his feet, so he collapsed onto his knees, never letting go of the small form that had trusted him with it’s safety. His body yelled in agony, his chest hurt, and he was drenched in sweat, clothing practically sticking to him from underneath. Despite the pain, however, he was elated. Brown eyes looked down at the small crow, a loving smile coming over his face as it reached out to touch his nose curiously.
Koushi let out an audible laugh, a short one, reminding himself that Daichi told him he needed to express that more–apparently his laughs were something of a mood enhancer.
A shadow soon draped itself over him, a larger splice looking over him cheerily. Koushi never learned their names, he felt he didn’t need to. Most of them were unable to speak or communicate in anyway, and the sounds they made, although probably understandable–were not something Koushi could hear. They were at a stand still without Daichi, but they didn’t need a translator to help them understand why he was there.
The antelope like creature reached blackened hands out for the bird, who quietly allowed itself to be taken. A nod was offered in Koushi’s direction, a small bow following soon after, which returned wholeheartedly. The little thing was safe now, and that’s all that mattered. He was only seen, not identified, and the little being could not be traced down into the depths of the Earth to a place the surface did not know existed. Not that where he was was the place, no, of course not. This was one of the many passageways, if someone found out about them, digging splices would quickly seal up this portal and open up new ones elsewhere. The ones in the city were merely for people like him that wished to bring splices to safety.
He couldn’t settle down though, despite the good that was able to come from just this one rescue.
Koushi grit his teeth, pressing fists into his thighs. He was only one person, and only one person couldn’t do much of anything in lieu of all the traffickers. He had managed to steal the cargo of many vans, caravans and various other vehicles. He could only ever take one or two, when there were so many. The anguish that filled his lungs, he wanted to scream, scream so loud that he could hear it.
There were so many of them this time, and it hurt him. It hurt him more than the pain he felt during his run. It ached him more than the pounding sensation that left his leg muscles like pudding. This one little bird, a beautiful baby like the ones that humans bore every day. And there were so many, so many crying, screaming, begging to be set free. His heart cried for them, harder than his eyes ever could. More than the tears that dropped over his knuckles, splashing delicately over reddening skin. For Koushi, who didn’t like talking out of fear of being ridiculed, there were some things that just had to be expressed.
“There–so many of them. I couldn’t–get them all,” He said, his throat tingling as he looked up at the saddened expression on the splice that had agreed to come meet him. Who bent at the knees and reached a hard hand out, brushing away the tears that stained his cheeks, “ I’m–only one, so many…oh so many…”
They were words he himself couldn’t hear, but he knew what he was saying. The non-judgmental gaze of the other creature was enough to ease the heaviness in his chest, it feeling partially alleviated when they pressed their nose against his forehead. A moment of acceptance, acknowledgement for all he had done. It still wasn’t enough for Koushi, he still blamed himself for not being super human, but at least he wasn’t blamed for his incompetence.
“Next time–,” Koushi struggled to say, tongue clicking slightly against the roof of his mouth in an attempt to find the words he wanted, “Next time, more. One more.”
The other being smiled at him as he stood up, nodding toward him in agreement and turning away. They walked down one of the other paths, leaving Koushi by himself. It was fine, all he had to do was go the long way around. There were several passages, the right one to get back home was one of the ones he knew by heart. He didn’t need help no matter how weak his legs were from the strenuous exercise that he had put himself through.
It took roughly around an hour to get back home, the dirty, battered man seeking the comfort of a bed. It was nearing five in the morning, the sun was slowly going to start coming up for its first breath over the horizon soon enough. Daichi was a morning person, he usually was up by around that time–however he had the inkling that Koushi was going about being reckless. Maybe he’d be awake, Koushi internally prayed that he wasn’t.
Trembling fingers opened the door, greeted by a dark room and a sigh of relief blew past his lips. Koushi turned around to close the door quietly, realizing very quickly that he was too wound up to actually be any tired. He spent the day doing not much else, sleeping in had turned into his new trademark, much to Daichi’s disapproval. Not that he’d actually make him stay awake until it was dark, Daichi didn’t have the heart to do it and he knew Koushi wouldn’t listen anyway. It was a sin, but Koushi inwardly considered it a virtue.
Before he could settle down, the kitchen light came on, a large figure appearing in his peripheral, a large grin coming over his features once he saw whom it was.
Asahi, Koushi signed away cheerily, I’m so glad to see you, aren’t you supposed to be asleep or did you have another nightmare?
The splice flinched slightly, clumsy replying with shaky fingers, No, I just…didn’t see you when I woke up and I was wondering if you were okay.
He was amused by the response, waving off the other’s concern. There is no need for any of that, he returned, I just ran into a little trouble getting back.
Oh..but why? You left when Daichi-san..fell asleep..
Before Koushi could reply, he watched as Asahi became visibly startled, the large hawk splice cowering under a wing while looking at the doorway. Koushi threw his head back, brown eyes locking onto the tired form of his oldest friend, Sawamura Daichi, standing at the entrance to the bedrooms with a quizzical, less than pleased expression on his features. Deep bags had etched into his face, a result of many early morning wake up calls. Koushi found it funny, and it must have showed.
Lazily, Daichi began making gestures at him, sloppy ones that were probably the result of him not being totally awake yet, Oh, you’re in big trouble now, Suga.
Asahi quickly moved over toward Koushi, sitting right next to him as if Daichi truly was going to do something horrible. The entire scene was hilarious, and Koushi found it in him to laugh. Not a loud one of course, just the quick motion of his stomach, making his sore body twinge a little bit as it attempted to reciprocate the thoughts that were coursing through his head.
I’m not and you know it, Koushi responded simply, an almost angelic smile coming over his lips before he pat Asahi on the head.
Daichi shook his head disapprovingly, moving over and planting himself on the small couch with both of them.
Koushi closed his tired eyes momentarily, throwing his arms around both of his friends and pulling them into an embrace. Daichi gave Asahi a confused expression, probably the result of some kind of noise Asahi made that Koushi couldn’t hear.
He smiled even brighter.
Asahi squirmed a tad, the larger bird creature attempting to pull away in a bid to get some breathing room for those all too large wings Koushi had grown to admire.
He offered a grin, freeing Daichi from his hold and reaching that hand over, scratching at the soft patch of fuzz that graced Asahi’s chin. The larger man accepted to the touch, even leaning into it slightly as Koushi removed the arm that had wrapped itself around his shoulder.
Koushi quietly noted the slightly scratchy, bumpy details of the other man’s chin, akin to how Daichi’s felt whenever he went too long without shaving or doing any maintenance. The differences lay in the beginnings of baby feathers that decorated the underside, the ones Asahi picked at in some strange neurotic habit he had acquired.
He felt Daichi lean over his shoulder, feeling the slight rumble that coursed through him and the obvious signs of a flustered Asahi come to light. Asahi’s eyes, that had closed and clearly expressed pleasure from the welcomed touches, shot open. Koushi could practically feel the quirked eyebrow, that all knowing look that was akin to his own.
Asahi, thoroughly disturbed, didn’t even signal and moved away, a little deflated but clearly not unhappy by the change. Daichi shook his head, poked at Koushi’s cheek and signed that he was going back to bed and that if Koushi ever wanted to give sleeping a second thought that the bed was right there.
Koushi only nodded and watched his childhood friend give his shoulder a slight, comforting shake before moving away and leaving Koushi by himself with the cloying thoughts that had a habit of rushing back toward him when he was alone–surrounded by nothing other than the clawing shadows.
He moved to lay himself along the length of the couch, lips pursing as he tried to shake off that feeling, the one of utter weightlessness–uselessness. The same feeling that came to him every night before he submitted himself to tired unconsciousness. A long day and another soul saved, but he couldn’t focus on that.
Koushi only thought of the souls he couldn’t save, the babies he heard crying. They were headed to a place far beyond his hands could reach. His fingers and body, although they tried, battered and bruised as they were. This human body could only do so much before those looming shadows came back over his head and reminded him all too much of that uselessness.
The dreams always started out the same.
A body too big for him, a face he couldn’t recognize or see in the faded shadows. The dreams never let Koushi see who he was playing, or representing, but they were as lucid as dreams could get. He could feel everything, despite this form being borrowed. It was the only time in his life where his brain mimicked sound, the touches were all there though. The bright shining lights that blinded his foreign eyes, the sensation of claws scratching against steel that decorated the table he was strapped too.
A large form, with wings pressed so tightly against solid ground that he was surprised he could feel the sensation of absolute discomfort. There were other feelings too, misery, fear. Koushi could feel blood that wasn’t his pumping in and out of a scared heart. He himself was not scared, but it was like watching a movie. He had no choice but to be, because whoever this was was horrified.
A morbid reality peaking into the brain before ebbing away into a vast array of absolutely nothing.
A soft murmur, one he felt through his body, it told him of this place. The knowledge of another. The laboratories of a place most denied existing, but he knew was all too real. A place where splices were taken care of, so to speak. They were bred, raised, and turned into what they would be useful as. Whatever that use may be, it didn’t matter to the owners of this decrepit place. Koushi knew that reality all too well.
The thoughts stilled as blurry figures made their way into the vicinity, making short work of the creature in front of them. A few drugs to erase mobility but not hinder the ability to move entirely.
Koushi watched as words etched themselves out into the area in front of him.
A beautiful bird, they said.
They had repeated those words and burned them into the skin of this splice. A gorgeous bird, a species albeit not rare, but not common all together. A predatory species that was believed to be all but wiped out to save humanity’s hide. They were monsters, and now they were their’s.
Oh, what a beautiful bird.
He wasn’t good for the special operations team, as sad as that made the men that crowded around, hands to clipboards. He wasn’t good at following orders.
He wasn’t good for a single team in their hidden army, a reality Koushi figured but had no adequate proof these existed. This was only a dream after all, this bird didn’t listen well.
He wasn’t good as a sex slave, and at that, the splice moved slightly, claws digging into reddening palms as they tried to settle their breathing. Koushi felt himself on the edge, looking over a cliff with the fear of teetering off. The emotions that flooded him, reminding him of a situation that he was all too familiar with.
Those unfamiliar hands slipping over a body that reacted but refused, a mind that screamed but a mouth that failed to heed. Instead there was only response, the sensation of being pulled apart from the waist down, your throat hurting as nothing but sheer agony coursed through your veins. Claws that had become your weapons, bound. Drugs were always used for these instances, Koushi noted, trying to swallow his raging heart for the sake of keeping the lucid dream going.
Those memories, they pulled away only to show the next instance. The mistake they had made. His throat was sore, his body in pain but that didn’t quell the brewing storm of an animal wronged. This animal, who seemed so fearful and docile and had done nothing to deserve any of the strangulation, asphyxiation, the torment of having someone do the unthinkable. A power Koushi had only wished he had surged forward and decimated the lingering effects of the drugs administered.
Koushi jolted violently, watching as claws he knew weren’t his reached for the man that had his genitals buried deep in a throat that didn’t ask for any of it. Brown eyes widened as those strong appendages dug into the skull, every moment flashing by so slowly that he thought it was purposely being slowed down. Black talons struck down, the snapping of bone ringing so hard that Koushi felt it down his spine.
He had no need to hear it, the sensation was enough.
The strong wave, brain and fluid squishing under powerful hands and being splayed open. Tissue splashing tenderly against a face he didn’t recognize, but had grown to love all the same. Koushi adored them all, even if they committed acts like this. He couldn’t judge them for their bitterness, their insatiable rage.
They were mistreated after all, held down. Numbers cut down and re-purposed for the sole idea of control.
Koushi couldn’t bring himself to feel disgust over the matter that spilled over those hands, the sensation akin to him with the way he worked with ground beef. Perhaps just a bit slimier, especially since it was more tissue than meat, but nothing he couldn’t handle. The disgust fluttered away, swirling down the pipes in his brain until it was replaced by nothing more than a quiet serenity. His body felt at ease, despite how high strung it was.
That’s how those dreams always were.
Even as he stirred awake, eyes watching as the sunlight broke through the curtain, fogged vision greeted he lifted himself off of the couch. Koushi’s face turned sour, noting a small trail of saliva that had dripped out of his mouth and pooled onto the side of his face. A byproduct of sleeping, he knew, probably the most unsavory product of sleeping he’d ever lay eyes on, but that alone didn’t quell the feeling of disgust turning circles in his gut.
Those dreams remained the same, and he was nothing but a mere visitant.
The sensations crawled up every nerve and set them on fire, the realization of the images he had just seen. Koushi only wondered momentarily why he of all people had to be plagued with the nightmares. The only conclusion he had ever been able to come to was his deep desire to be able to help the splices. The desire to get closer to them, and understand as much as a human could understand. These rights of passage were not his own experiences, and he couldn’t even be sure they were real experiences at all, just the winded dreams of a man whose soul yearned and could not be set free.
He removed himself from the couch and briefly went about making sure both Asahi and Daichi were asleep, both men safe and sound and Daichi’s mouth making contortions he recognized as snoring. It gave him peace of mind, at least.
Koushi quickly retreated back toward the living room, making a b line for the kitchen to occupy his teetering mind and his probing thoughts. He could have sworn sometimes that other things were done to him while he was asleep, matters of the fourth kind. Splices existed in a world with humans, who could so readily dispute the existence of extraterrestrials?
He quickly shook his head, busying himself with preparing the morning’s breakfast, an omelet would do nicely, with some cheese–perhaps something much more hearty like potatoes to add to the mix?
Koushi hadn’t been preparing food for long when he felt someone stand behind him, the looming figure wasn’t large, wasn’t all that tall. So he didn’t feel the need to turn around and give them the time of day, he only turned his nose up into the air and closed his eyes. Didn’t even feel the need to register those pokes at his cheek, not at all. They were as annoying as the man that stood behind him.
Slowly, Daichi swiveled to face him, looking at him a little expectantly, not disappointed, but clearly not pleased by what Koushi only assumed to be the fact he hadn’t slept properly. He could feel those bags drawn under his eyes, but he still managed to cheerily respond with his free hand.
Good morning, my dear prince. Would you be a dear and get me some more butter, I seem to have forgotten it, Koushi attempted with a hand, though he figured it came out more like, ‘hi, get me a thing out of the fridge.’
Daichi only rolled his eyes at the gesture, moving away from Koushi and giving him breathing room he appreciated. Despite appearances, his jaw felt used, and he could still feel those cold hands as they pulled it apart forcefully. Another reason he didn’t necessarily like having lucid dreams about these things, he woke up often with an ailment that persisted–today it just so happened to be the end result of being fucked in the mouth.
His lips twisted into something foul, Koushi was never too fond of blunt words–but there was never going to be another way to describe how raw and sore his throat felt. How dry his mouth was.
He felt Daichi return, throwing a stick of butter haphazardly onto the counter and offering up a bemused expression in place of his distaste. Koushi only snapped his teeth at him, reaching his free hand over and shoving him so hard he almost toppled into one of the nearby chairs in the tiny kitchen. Daichi shot him a look, vaguely gesturing to the large sleeping form in the far corner of the kitchen.
Koushi shrugged playfully, wiggling the knife he’d been using toward Daichi, who quickly sauntered off into the living room. His eyes kept trained on that form, eyeing the friend he held on a pedestal so high that one day it was going to bite him back in the ass and he knew it. The contempt flooded his chest, creating another disturbing sensation that served to degrade the endings of his nerves, temper that fire for the sake of calculation.
He finished the meal as quickly as he could before making his way out into the living room, calm eyes landing on Daichi. Koushi clapped his hands together to grab his attention, a smile coming over his lips. He chose to ignore the startled look that overtook Daichi before he began signing.
The rally is today, get some breakfast and let's get going before it gets too full.