Chapter Text
As much as Thoma desired to hang out with Ayato all that he obtained in exchange the following week were fleeting glances, short smiles, a handful of words, and a sneaky peck on the cheek.
They both had duties to perform, and if they share any trait it would be their perfectionism. Gunhildr Clan's reputation and readiness were at a stake here, and every morning Thoma checked everything twice, from the maid's and butlers' uniforms to the food that left the kitchens. Ayato, on his side, is used to represent the Kamisato Clan but the foreign attendants alongside the new location and customs are factors big enough to put pressure even on him.
His mind travels back and forth to that night, to that shared moment of pure intimacy that still makes his heart flutter as if he were a teenager. Maybe, deep down he still is. The sun seems brighter, and the days an endless assortment of chances to encounter Thoma here and there. The gardens fit his golden aura but watching him work, all diligent stares and professional smirks, has proved incredibly rewarding, Ayato has found out. Teasing the blond subtly while he’s at work is an added pleasure, even if Kazuha stares at him scoldingly.
What, inevitably, drags Ayato’s mind back to his current problem at hand. Taking Thoma to Inazuma.
Kamisato Ayato is a name to revere back in his homeland. He is a man of his word, and a good player at the power game, loyal but not naïve, influential but not an extortionist. He likes to be two or three steps ahead of his competitors and enemies, but this time he has none of those. Thoma is no competition, and not an enemy – of all, he’s only a threat to his heart – but that doesn’t make the situation any less uncertain and tricky.
If Ayato went ahead and asked the Gunnhildr clan to simply free Thoma of his duties, he would face a thick, tall Mondstadtian wall. No wonder why, Thoma is reliable and hardworking, and from what Ayato has gathered, he has a special relationship with the two heads of the family, Jean, and Barbara.
The second option would be for Thoma to renounce. Just mentioning the possibility sounds idiotic to the core. Someone like Thoma would never do such a thing, even if it would ease the situation for Ayato.
And, who could blame Thoma? He had only known Ayato for short while he’s been working and living within the Gunhildr clan since he was a kid. The balance is clearly off. What does Ayato have to offer that would shift the balance towards him? Adventure? A sea trip? Living at the Kamisato state? …His heart and devotion?
While Ayato’s thoughts went wild with the endless possibilities, the blue-haired lord didn’t notice Kazuha approaching from behind. The meeting had ended a while ago, and most of the other participants had left the room. When Kazuha’s scarlet eyes landed on Ayato’s messy scribblings on his notes he couldn’t suppress a snort.
“Ayato, this isn’t like you at all” - the tiny smirk on his face really annoyed Ayato. He had been caught. “Doodling while absent on a meeting… I can’t wait to tell this to Ayaka.”
“Please, spare me” - he sighed, defeated. “I would never hear the end of it.” - His sister, as sweet as she is, can also be really vindictive. In a fond, sisterly way, of course.
“Does this absentmindedness has anything to do with a certain blond?” - Kazuha went straight to the point. “I’ve seen him this morning, he greeted me as cheerful as always, but I could see that he was looking for someone else.”
Ayato let out a short chuckle. “That’s why I always trust your opinion on important matters, Lord Kaedehara. Your perception is always on point.”
“Is that a yes?”
“Do you really need to ask?”
Kazuha laughed. “From all of the things we expected to achieve with this summit, a bride for you wasn’t among them.”
“He’s not a bride. And he’s not mine. Not yet.”
“Keep telling that to yourself.” - Kazuha wore a neutral expression, but after all this time together, it was easy for Ayato to discern when the white-haired man was being playful. “What are you going to do about Thoma, then?”
Trying to keep his hands occupied on something other than Thoma, Ayato started packing his belongings from the table. “I don’t know.” - he glance at Kazuha, that arched an eyebrow in surprise. “I know it’s weird to hear that coming from me. I’m used to dealing with death threats, danger, and treason. But love… this is very different.”
“Thoma is a threat. To your reasoning.”
“What are you trying to say?”
“Exactly what I said.” - Kazuha sighed, leaving Ayato’s side to leave the room. “You can’t treat this situation like your work as the Head Commissioner because this isn’t work, Ayato. Is that simple.”
“It is not. I can’t ask him to renounce, and I can’t ask the Gunnhildr to simply hand him to me, because he is not an object to be handed down.” - Ayato sounded exasperated. Another unusual sight.
“You are right when you say that he won’t simply renounce, there’s too much going between them for that. But if you can’t ask and he can’t just leave, there’s only one other option for you.”
“Which is?”
Kazuha shrugged. “Take him.”
Some time ago, when Kazuha announced that he was leaving Inazuma with a renowned captain and her fleet, Ayato wondered if they would be a good influence for Kazuha that had just undergone a major familiar crisis. When he came back, Ayato thought that maybe he had judged Captain Beidou too quickly based only on tales and gossip. Folk talk is useful from time to time, but too much can turn the most reputable person into a devil in just the blink of an eye. However, he is now certain that the Liyue woman and her crew turned Kazuha into a pirate.
The worst part is that Ayato was starting to like the idea.
A couple more weeks passed and the summit came to an end.
That thought only made Thoma’s stomach churn in anxiety.
Noelle, Barbara, even Jean, and other members of staff have noticed his fidgety, nervous ways recently. In the beginning, they attributed it to the extra work the summit implies, and a more than probable lack of sleep. But those who know him better also know that there’s something else lying underneath.
“Thoma” - Thoma instantly jumped, like a rabbit, when he heard Noelle’s voice at the other side of his bedroom door. Luckily it was closed. “Master Jean and Master Barbara sent me to remind you of the hour. Is everything alright? It’s unusual of you to not be ready on time.”
“I’m fine, I’m fine.” - Thoma replied, trying to steady his voice as much as possible. “Not in my most dexterous day with the tie, but I’ll be down in five. Thanks, Noelle.”
As soon as he heard a soft agreement hum and Noelle’s footsteps going downstairs, Thoma let out a single sigh. Long and exhausted, exactly how his nerves felt. He sat down on his bed, tying his tie without difficulty. He had lied to a valued colleague and that made him feel even more awful. If only he was just as brave as he likes to picture himself. Another layer of dissatisfaction sat upon the rest, a pile of discomfort.
During the last days of the summit, he encountered Ayato many times. At the gardens, they shared a couple of long, passionate kisses that still make him blush to the tip of his ears, and they even held hands back into the Gunnhildr manor. The giddiness he felt when Ayato offered to skip a meeting or two just to see each other could not be mistaken as anything else but love. Of course, Thoma refused, yet the offer was more than enough to feel the warm fondness spreading inside his chest. Glances and conversations between meetings and meals, some strolls under the moon’s silver gaze… but not even once Thoma dared to ask the very question that has been poisoning his mind.
What happens next?
All of the attendants are meant to leave between tomorrow and the day before that. So, what happens next? Will he receive a letter or two from Ayato once he gets back to Inazuma and that’s it? Would it be appropriate for him to answer? Will he ever fulfill his promise? Will they ever see each other again?
The question always leaves behind a long trail of unanswered inquiries. Yet, Thoma’s biggest issue isn’t the questions, is the fact that he doesn’t feel like he has the right to ask them away.
The sooner I realize this was just a one-time thing, the better. He sighs, defeated. What were you thinking, Thoma? A Lord? From Inazuma? A groan escapes his lips just as quickly as his last will to attend the ball. But work is work, he has his suit on and he can already hear the rumble and mumble coming from the lower floors in the manor. Parties about to begin resemble water about to boil; bubbles always find the surface as much as guests find their way to the dance hall.
Thoma glances at his reflection one last time wondering if the defeat inside his system would be tangible from the outside. With an exhalation, he leaves for the ballroom where he might see his inazuman lord one more time.
The first ball they attended at Gunnhildr manor had been luxurious and welcoming, but there was another word that would fit better for the last one: extravagant.
The Gunnhildr manor opened its doors to more humble personalities of Mondstadt, in an attempt to strengthen their community and relationships with other countries and markets. Printers, sellers, jewelers, and dressmakers as well as every other kind of artist and artisan with a name in Mondstatd attended the last ball of the summit, crowding the ballroom and the manor’s gardens. Beverages and food came from the kitchens like an endless river of silver trays and delicate glasses. The music invited everyone to dance if they dared, or if they fancied someone enough to ask the pertinent question.
It didn’t matter, liyuean, inazuman, or mondstadtian, the three nations danced together in a blur of ornate dresses and bright-colored suits under the glass chandeliers.
Ayato, wearing his most formal attire, awaited. He had already been asked twice or thrice to dance, and while Kazuha and other members of the committee accepted their own requests without objections, he had other goals in mind. His ribbons, medals, and blue shirt all complimented his fairness, and the white suit elongated, even more, his lean legs. Many have inquired – not to him, but to his retainers – about marriage possibilities, his future, and how much of a heartbreaker he is back at Inazuma. Every single person that dared to ask such frivolities wore a shocked expression when they heard the truth; Kamisato Ayato is single, and as far as they could tell he had no lovers or such. Ayato had to laugh.
But little did they know, Kamisato Ayato had a plan tonight. One already in motion.
Across the crowded room, his lavender eyes landed on a certain blond head. Politely dismissing himself from his current conversation, Ayato crossed the room without hesitation dodging conversations and acquaintances as amiably as he could. He noticed Thoma’s sudden change of demeanor when his green eyes reached Ayato, making Ayato’s heart drop.
“A busy night?” - Ayato greeted Thoma, hoping to see that sweet smile of his.
“You can’t imagine, my Lord” - Thoma huffed. “There’s so much to supervise and take care of that I might forget to breathe any second.”
“I hope you don’t” - Ayato agreed. Approaching Thoma’s ear, he whispered. “But if you feel like you ran out of air I know a place with plenty of it.”
Thoma blushed heavily. “M-My Lord?”
Ayato winked playfully, his feet already in motion towards a balcony that both of them knew very well. Thoma followed, feeling in his feet and throat the heaviness of his heartbeat. Outside, the air was crisp enough to consider their outside meeting a bad idea, but Ayato under the argent lights, a sheer display of undisturbed beauty and grace was enough to make Thoma forget about the cold. Even so, the thought that this might be their last time together clutched Thoma’s heart within its somber hands.
“Does this balcony bring any memories?” - Ayato asked, a playful smile shining on his face.
Thoma nodded, fond. “Do they count as memories if they are recent?”
“They count if they are dear.” - Ayato replied, sure. “And you are very dear to me, Thoma.”
“Stop.”
The sudden request, alongside Thoma’s unusually firm tone, halted Ayato. Like the lightning that precedes a summer storm. “I can’t take it.” - Thoma let out biting his lower lip. “I can’t take it anymore.”
Ayato approached, concerned. His pale hand reached Thoma’s warm cheek with affection, but it only find hurt in return. “What’s wrong, Thoma?”
“I-I…” - Thoma exhaled. “I mean no disrespect, my Lord. But I fail to see where this is taking any of us. “ - His voice sounded more like a whisper now, strangled and doubtful. “I fail to understand how my Lord is going to fulfill his promise of taking me to Inazuma.” At least, if he breaks my heart now, I’ll know that I did everything in my hand. I did my best.
Ayato’s hand kept caressing Thoma’s cheeks, and with small pressure on his jaw, he lifted Thoma’s face to force those vibrant green eyes to look at him. “You have such little faith in me, huh?”
“That’s not…” - Thoma’s eyes traveled from the lavender of Ayato’s eyes to his mouth. Oh, how much he wished to simply shut up and kiss him. “I didn’t mean it like that.”
Ayato left a soft peck on Thoma’s cheek, where his fingers had been. Much to Thoma’s surprise, Ayato didn’t look offended or concerned. He wore his usual smirk always complimented by the mole under his lip. “Luckily for you, I always have a plan.” Even though I should credit Kazuha for this one.
Inside Thoma’s eyes shone hope, wonder, and emotion. He wanted to know but Ayato was two steps ahead. If he were to spill to Thoma his plan right now he would refute it, complain, and talk endlessly about pride, duty, honor… Ayato has heard about those concepts enough to entertain an argument about them at this very moment. “Thoma.” - Ayato grabbed both his hands. “I need to show you something. Could you put your tonight duties aside for me just a moment?” Thoma nodded, not entirely sure yet trusting Ayato. The Kamisato heir enjoyed that feeling a lot. “Follow me.”
The sight in front of him wasn’t what Thoma was expecting. To be fair not even Thoma knew what was he expecting.
“My Lord” - Thoma spoke. “What are we doing here?”
“At the Gunnhildr docks?” - Ayato smirked. “Well, I wanted to show you this vessel.” Ayato offered his hand to Thoma from the wooden gangway. The inazuman ship displayed dragon and thunder motives all over its hull in crimsons and purples. The craftsmanship was outstanding even for a small vessel. After a second or two of idleness, Thoma took Ayato’s hand, stepping into the deck right before the blue-haired lord.
“It’s a beautiful ship” - Thoma admitted. “But this is not the ship your party arrived to Mondstadt.”
“Indeed.” - Ayato nodded. “But it is the ship I’m using to leave.”
Only then, Thoma noticed the slow and subtle movement of the ship. The first waves made it wobble yet his feet didn’t waver. “My Lord?” Thoma ran to the side, his eyes staring right into the dark waters below as if they were to provide any explanation. They were leaving the shore, and Thoma’s heart was just one beat away from leaving his ribcage through his mouth. “My Lord I can’t leave like this. I can’t leave Master Jean or Master Barbara. I gave my word, my duties…I…” - Thoma kept gaping like a fish on the surface water, yet no more words came out.
Ayato placed a hand on Thoma’s back. “Calm down.” - he laughed. “Do you believe me as insensitive as to kidnap you from your home and your honor?” - he sighed. “I see I have a lot of work to change your perception of me.”
“My Lord, that’s not what I mean… I’m, well, I’m shocked!”
Ayato laughed heartily, he didn’t want to laugh at Thoma’s despair, but his reaction was so endearing that he couldn’t help it. “Your Masters are informed of my plan. Both of them. Master Barbara cried, but she assured me that they were happy tears.”
“Master Barbara cried?” - Thoma’s question was full of guilt. “I feel awful.”
“Don’t be.” - Ayato placed his hand over Thoma’s, still grabbing the banister. “I am a man of my word, honor and duty have the same weight in my vocabulary as they do for you. After all, my entire life and education had those two concepts at their core. But I’m also a strategist.” - Thoma glanced at him, eager to know more. Or, perhaps eager to find a reason to not jump into the sea while he can. “The night I promised you that I’ll take you to Inazuma I saw in your eyes that you wanted more. More than your duty and honor, more than your current life. But I also saw the weight and the doubts. I knew that If I went ahead and asked you to leave with me you would say no out of commodity. And I can’t blame you, the first step is always the hardest. At the same time, I cannot cause a diplomatic war and kidnap you.”
“So you asked Master Jean about this”
Ayato nodded, content. “She agreed that you would never admit your true desires and that there would be no argument strong enough to convince you. Apparently, they all held you in great esteem as much as they fear your stubbornness.”
Thoma huffed, slightly offended. “I’m not that stubborn.”
They chuckled. Thoma was visibly more relaxed. “I must admit that Kazuha is the real architect of this whole procedure, but the refining is entirely mine. After talking with Master Jean we agreed to give you the push you needed to make a decision.” - Ayato paused, his stance more rigid. “Now, I shall ask you something, and I expect your absolute honesty. Do you want to come to Inazuma with me, Thoma? If you do not say it now, the ship can turn back.”
Thoma’s soul effectively left his body that instant. Master Jean and Ayato schemed all of this so he could fulfill a childish dream of his. He felt all of the years of hard work, all of the days and nights at the manor, and wondered if he had really paid his debt off. If Master Jean and Barbara would see him as he saw them, part of his family. This wasn’t about duty or honor anymore, it was about family. Glancing at Ayato he wondered if there would be a new family awaiting him at Inazuma.
“I wish I could’ve said goodbye.” - many memories crossed Thoma’s mind. Master Barbara’s recitals, Master Jean’s prizes at swordsmanship tournaments, their achievements and failures, their late-night conversations, every trip to the beach on hot summers and to Dragonspine in winter, their laughter, their warmth…his entire life flashing before his eyes as the manor hid amongst rolling hills caressed by the wind. “But I need to see what’s on the other side of the sea. I want to witness with my own eyes the beaches and purple-roofed castles you’ve been talking about. I want to see a true Inazuma storm, I want to learn about my father’s land. I want to live it.” - Thoma moved his hand to grab Ayato’s. “And I want to do it with you if you’ll have me, my Lord.”
Ayato’s smile reached his eyes. The utter delight and peace he felt inside his ribcage could be a poem in itself. “Of course. I don’t want anyone else.”
Thoma leaned in, gifting Ayato their first kiss outside of Mondstadt. It tasted like adventures and expectations. Like lightning and wind. It tasted like a promising future.