Chapter Text
“My mother…?” Hyunjin whispered out, his brows furrowing in scepticism. The action seemed to go rather unnoticed by the majority, the only exception being a certain short fellow however as the group’s attention was pulled away from the male by a loud whistle. Their eyes instantly gravitated towards the source of the sound - Chan. His eyes were wide open in partial disbelief and surprise, “No way? The Hwang ? Hyunjin’s mom? Man, talk about a small world.”
“Who is that? Why is it that surprising? Is she that amazing?” Felix questioned the older, voicing out the question that the majority of them had. Chan began to gush, “Who is she? Only one of the most legendary Special Class investigators that ever climbed the ranks.”
“She’s known to have a near 100% success rate with ghoul raids and she’s even more well known for her iconic ruby-like axe and her ability to handle large groups of ghouls simultaneously. Not to mention she married the equally reputable Mr. Hwang. Really cool if you think of them as your seniors. But as a ghoul? She’s practically a menace.” The half-ghoul explained.
Minho nodded along to this, providing further affirmation to Chan’s words. His eyes showed an appreciating glint as he continued on to add to the older’s comments, “Yeah, she was truly a kind and inspiring person. Actually, she was a big part of the reason I worked so hard to become a CCG officer - my role model in a sense.”
“Enough about her from me and Chan though. Why don’t we hear about her from Hyunjin? Considering he lives with the woman, he definitely knows more about her than we ever could. Hyunjin’s lucky to have her.” Minho remarked.
The group’s attention shifted back to the youngest Investigator and were confused upon seeing the male’s rather pale and distraught face. He seemed to be caught in some kind of trance until someone had let out a small cough, trying to grab his attention. It seemed to work as Hyunjin slightly flinched before mumbling incoherently - a great feat considering the room was filled with people who have enhanced hearing.
Jisung was the first to speak up, “What was that, Hyunjin?”
The older male seemed very hesitant, constantly fidgeting and playing with his hands. His mouth started opening and closing multiple times as if he wanted to say something before taking a deep breath. When he finally did however, he was only able to utter a small whisper, “I uh… I-It’s nothing. It’s not anything important anyway.”
“Hey, you know you can talk to us right?” Felix asked, worried upon seeing the male’s hesitance. It was unusual for Hyunjin, who is normally so boisterous and outspoken to be so reserved, which did nothing but only made the blonde and the other inhabitants of the room to worry more. Hyunjin weakly shook his head, “No, really it’s nothing to worry about.”
“I beg to differ. You’re fidgeting and playing with your hands; A clear sign of nervousness. Not to mention how you’ve been leaning against the couch and your eyes have been out of focus ever since the topic got brought up.” Changbin bluntly cut in from where he sat the furthest from the others.
Awkward silence soon engulfed the room for quite some time before the shortest ghoul became quite overwhelmed with all the eyes being directed at him as he shifted in his seat. “Uh, was that a bit too direct? Sorry, I read something about it online once and it- well I thought- you know what I’ll just- yea.”
The tall male let out a hollow chuckle and shook his head, “No, you don’t need to apologise.”
Taking a deep breath he continued, his face contorting in pain as he pushed on, “You’re right. About all of it. About me. But like I said it’s not really anything important. ”
Everyone seeing the ghoul’s plight stayed silent, shocked to see that the normally slightly cocky and easy going male looked so dishevelled. Changbin seemed hesitant for a moment but finally, he steeled himself, pulling the younger male into his arms, “We both know that isn’t true. You’ve been acting like this ever since we started the topic. Also, even if you don’t think it’s important, we might. So just take a deep breath and talk to us, okay?”
Chan quickly followed along putting in some comments of his own“Yeah, hyunjin-ah it matters to us. You matter to us. If something bothers you this much, we should talk about it. What better time than now?”
Afterwards, the others rushed forth to put out their opinions on the matter as well. Overwhelmed by their supportiveness he couldn't help but have tears build up in his eyes. Closing his eyes in order to clear the growing tears, he tightened his hold on his shoulder and took a deep, shaky breath as he tried to muster up the courage to finally speak up, “She- they… aren’t exactly the best.”
“Who?” Felix asked, knowing that the male would probably clarify even without the question being asked, he hoped that it would help the older feel less alone.
“Them. My mother and father.” Hyunjin said, his eyes losing their light, his complexion akin to that of a corpse.
“Well..,”Minho began. He had remained silent until now, feeling rather guilty for starting all of this but he couldn’t deny that he was also glad that he did since it was unlikely that the male would have opened up about it otherwise. Scratching the back of his head, he tried his best to ease the tension that he had accidentally created, “that’s rather…”
Hyunjin raised his eyebrows, chuckling lifelessly, “Unexpected? Heh, yeah it is, isn't it?”
With a small sigh, he looked all of them in the eye one by one as he said, “Well I guess it’s my turn then.”
~*~*~*~*~
A young boy was sitting in what appeared to be a large rather open room, a seemingly endless amount of well-made toys surrounding him in a wide circle. The only other person in the room was a middle aged woman, happily accompanying him as he played.
As the light coming through the window gradually faded, so did the light in the boy’s eyes. Eventually, he started to show disinterest towards the toys, knocking down the block tower he had spent hours meticulously building. What was the point if the people he wanted to show it to weren’t coming?
He also began to fidget, playing with his fingers as he seemed hesitant to voice out his thoughts. Seeing this, the woman gave him a small smile and began to coax him, “Hyunjin-ah, what did I tell you to do when you have something bothering you?”
He continued to play with his fingers as he silently stared at the now night sky through the window, and the woman began to think that she had failed to placate the child. But just as she was about to continue to cajole him, he spoke up, turning his head towards the woman, “You told me to tell you.” The woman nodded softly, clapping before proceeding to hug him, patting his head as she complimented him, “That’s right. My Hyunjin-ah is so smart isn’t he?”
The actions evidently calmed the child down. Deciding that it would now be okay for her to press a bit more, she let go of her hold on him. She held onto his shoulders as she urged him to speak up once more, “Now, come on. Tell me what’s going on in that tiny head of yours.”
The boy giggled at the comment, but soon quieted himself down as he looked to the side. “When is mommy and daddy coming back? Are they not coming home again? I… I miss them.” He said, voice soft, barely above a whisper. His caretaker’s face morphed seemingly pained as she gave him a sad smile, “I’m sorry, Hyunjin-ah. I also don't know.”
Hearing this, the boy pouted, his eyes watering. She immediately consoled him, “Oh love, don’t cry… I don’t know when they’ll come back but I’m sure that as long as you just keep staying with me, the next thing you know, they'll be back before you know it.”
Just then, the sound of a clock rang throughout the house and the woman immediately clapped her hands together as she gave him a smile, “Well, well. You know what that means, right?” She then brought him into her arms and tickled him whilst he gave out a few giggles at the sensation.
“Mhm! It’s time for dinner! Oh, oh! And bed after!” he exclaimed happily, jumping up and down. She smiled seeing his eager response and with equally as much enthusiasm, she cheered him on, “That’s right! Now help me clean up these toys, and then we can head to the kitchen.”
It only took them a short amount of time to put the toys back in their respective boxes despite their quantity, but eventually they were done. Dusting off her uniform as she stood up, the woman then headed towards the kitchen, with the tiny Hyunjin following right behind her, skipping as he went.
When they reached the kitchen, the woman turned around and looked at the boy who was still following closely behind her. He was now standing right next to her, holding tightly onto her hand. “Now then, I need to make some rice, alright? Why don’t you be a dear and help me get some of the things from the refrigerator?”
The room was filled with laughter and smiles as the two - mostly the nanny - worked on dinner. As the woman cut up the vegetables, she began to hum under her breath. Immediately recognising the song, Hyunjin began to vocally sing the lyrics. Smiling at the boy, the woman’s voice became louder and the two began to sing together.
It was undoubtedly unusual for a child of high status such as him to be helping out around the kitchen or tidying his toys. And the woman initially tried to convince him to let her do all the work she was paid to do. But Hyunjin had always been adamant on doing everything he could, whether it was with his nanny or during the rare occasions when his parents were home. He did it as if he wanted to prove something to them - or to himself.
The nanny eventually understood this and simply started accepting his help - even encouraging it at times.
When the meal was finally finished, the two went to the dining room with the many plates and bowls being brought on a food trolley. The woman began to set up the food on the table as Hyunjin on the closest chair. Soon after, they began to eat - Hyunjin always insisted on eating with the woman every time.
After all the plates were empty of food and dishes, the woman went back to the kitchen to clean up, leaving Hyunjin alone in the room. Putting the last of the dirty dishes away, she came back to the dining room and lifted him up from where he had sat, carrying him out into the hallway and into his room. She placed him down on the carpeted floor and told him to play on his own for a bit while she prepared his bath.
He obediently sat in the tub as she rubbed shampoo into his hair, careful to not let any of it enter his eyes. The comforting feeling of having his hair played with lulled him into a sleepy state to which his caretaker could only watch and chuckle softly. Speeding up her work, she quickly applied soap and rinsed him clean.
She then lifted him out of the bath and wrapped him in a big fluffy towel, patting him dry. Carrying him in her arms as she walked towards the centre of the room, “Come on, Hyunjin-ah, It’s time for bed Hyunjin-ah.”
“Okay…” He said, pouting, seemingly upset that he couldn’t stay up longer to play despite being tired. Seeing his downturned lips, she smiled and reminded him that their day wasn’t over just yet, “Aren’t you forgetting something?”
His face seemed to be riddled with question marks and he pointed at himself, as though asking to make sure that he was the one who forgot something. She nodded and smiled while watching as he tried to figure out what she was talking about. Suddenly, he let out a small gasp, his eyes lighting up as he squealed, “Bedtime story!”
She laughed, “That’s right.”
He began to squirm, unable to contain his excitement, ”What story are you going to tell me today?” She tilted her head to the side, pretending to think for a moment before clapping her hands, “I know! How does ‘TheLittle Prince’ sound?”
“Yeah! I like it! That’s my favourite!”
With that, she began to read the book to him, trying her best to give him the most vivid and beautiful images she could. Slightly over halfway through the book Hyunjin began to yawn, clearly feeling drowsy. She rubbed the top of his head and closed the book, “Well I think that’s enough for today.”
She got up to place the book back to the bookshelf and came back, tucking him into his bed, “Good night.” She then made her way to the door, pausing slightly as she heard sounds of the bed sheets rustling from behind her. Not thinking much of it, she continued to open the door but stopped upon the child’s beckoning, “Ms. Choi.”
She turned around as she responded,“Yes?”
“You forgot Jiniret.” He said his lips jutted out in a sad pout, his arms tucked into his sides, almost as though he was about to throw a tantrum. She couldn’t help but let out a giggle at his cuteness before consoling him, “Oh! That’s my bad. I’ll get him right now.”
She looked around the room and took the plush from where it lay on the carpet. Rubbing her fingers on the soft material, she smiled in reminiscence of how happy Hyunjin was on the day she gave him the doll. Not wanting to miss any opportunity to tease the cute toddler, she immediately questioned him, wiggling her eyebrows as she did so, “You really like him, huh?”
“Of course I will like him! You gave him to me!” He exc;aimed, playing with his fingers as his cheeks began to turn a faint red. She gushed at him, cupping his slightly chubby cheeks in her hands, “Heh, well isn’t my little Hyunjin-ah just such a cutie?”
After a few minutes of even more affectionate hugging and gushing, she proceeded to turn off the bedside lamp to let him sleep. Suddenly, with one hand still wrapped around the soft plush, he reached his other hand, holding onto hers once again not letting her leave as he drowsily asked, “Does mommy and daddy not like me?”
She tightened her hand around his, her eyes softening at the question. She knelt at the side of his bed, caressing the side of his face as she consoled him, “Of course they do.” Even in his drowsy state he seemed to be sceptical of her words, slightly tearing up “Then why do they never spend time with me?”
“That’s because they’re out working for your sake. To give you food to eat, a bed to sleep on.”
She said, reassuring him. It seems that her words had placated the young child as he finally let go of her hand. Walking towards the door, she turned off the lights, smiling as she bid him goodnight.
~*~*~*~*~
“Get away from me!”
The young Hyunjin was startled awake by the sudden scream. Looking around frantically he started panicking when he realised that the room was dark and devoid of any life. Suddenly he heard a series of loud clanging and shouts, followed by hurried footsteps.
Terrified, he softly calls out, “M-ms. Choi?”
The lack of response scared him even more as the sounds continued to get closer and closer to where he was. Not quite knowing what else to do, he ran to hide in the closet, covering his ears, silently crying, his body shaking.
Then he heard the muffled sound of his door locking, he wondered who it was but was too scared to open the doors and look. Footsteps paced around the room as though frantically looking for something. It was then that the person spoke, “Hyunjin-ah where are you?!”
Instant relief rushed over him and he opened the closer door slightly, calling out to his nanny, “Over here!” She whipped around, and ran over to him opening the door, checking to see if he had been hurt in any way. Upon making sure he was fine, Ms. Choi breathed a sigh of relief, “Oh thank god.”
She reached into the closet to grab him when the door knob was turned. When the door failed to be opened, the person on the other side began to frantically try opening it.
“Ms. Choi, who is that?” Hyunjin asked in a whisper, his voice trembling.
She paused for a second, thinking. Immediately after, her gaze turned heavy as she looked at the young child. She took him into her arms and hushed him, “No one. I need you to listen to me, Hyunjin. Don’t come out of there until I come to get you okay?”
Suddenly, the door knob stopped turning and loud laughter resounded through the house. Then, a shrill voice roared out from the other side of the door, “Hey, lady! I know you’re in there! Not quite smart to lock yourself in, you know!”
This scared the young boy even more, his breath hitching, as he whined “I’m scared.”
“Don’t cry, okay? Be strong Hyunjin-ah.” She said, her grip on his body getting tighter. Letting go of her hug she continued, “Don’t worry, honey. Everything’s going to be okay.”
“You remember what I said? Stay here, okay?”
He was confused but nodded nonetheless, “Okay…”
“Now, close your eyes for me and try not to make a sound.”
He nodded and closed his eyes, he felt her leave a kiss on the top of his head, “I love you, Hyunjin-ah.” With that, she shut the closet door. He remembered what she had told him to do and obediently covered his ears waiting for her to return.
He had heard a lot of things that night. Although he would never be too sure of what exactly had happened since they were muffled by his shaking hands. He barely even noticed as his breathing became irregular, silent sobs racking through his little figure.
It felt like he had been stuck in that closet for an eternity. All he had known was that his caretaker had told him to stay put and the next thing he knew someone, who appears to be a police officer, found him.
“I found him!” The man shouted before forcefully removing him from the closet as he struggled to get the man to let go of him. Realising his efforts were futile, he couldn’t help but cry, “Let go! Ms told me to stay until she gets me!”
He was then brought to the medical team. However, he didn’t understand that the people were trying to help him and fought back, his only thoughts being his nanny’s last words. Eventually they had to restrain him to the bed. But even that didn't seem to be enough.
It was a wonder how he could muster up that much energy in his small body. Perhaps the anger, confusion and frustration he was feeling fueled him? In any case, it seemed the medics weren’t in the mood to play around as they sedated him.
“Ms.Choi, help me…”
~*~*~*~*~
When he woke up, he was greeted by a white ceiling. Confused, he sat up and rubbed his eyes, yawning and calling out, “Ms. Choi?”
Silence.
It was then he opened his eyes fully, realising he wasn’t at home. He looked around and finally noticed a figure that seemed awfully familiar, through the partial glass door, standing outside the room. She seemed to be talking to a couple of people.
“Ms. Choi? ”
~*~*~*~*~
The next few days passed by like a blur. He was lonely, Ms.Choi hadn’t come to see him at all since that day. He had been moved to a nearby hotel the day he woke up. The entire time he was there, the only people he met were the hotel staff who delivered him meals.
Not too long after, he was brought back to his house. As soon as the car pulled to a stop, he rushed into the house, “Ms. Choi?”
He ran around trying to look for her but couldn’t find her anywhere. Returning back to the front door where he had started his search, he felt extremely upset. ‘Was I naughty? Why doesn’t Ms.Choi want to come and see me?’ he thought, tears welling in his eyes.
He sat on the ground and sobbed, not understanding anything that’s been going on.
At that moment the door behind him creaked open and he immediately stopped, rubbing his eyes, “Ms.Choi? You came ba-”
“Mommy?!” He exclaimed, surprised. “Mommy, you’re back!”
The woman was dressed neatly, her silk black hair put up in a neat low bun. She glanced at his figure and almost immediately broke out into a frown, scolding him harshly “What are you doing?! Get up, it’s dirty.”
“Oh! Okay, mommy! Sorry…” He said, picking himself up from the floor, his head bowed in shame for having made his mother mad. She watched quietly, her gaze sharp like blades. She scoffed and turned around to leave.
“Wait!”
She stopped in her tracks.
“Mommy, do you know where Ms.Choi is? She’s been gone for a while now…” Hyujin asked, playing with the ends of his clothes, once again upset once he recalled the reason behind his tears.
Not even bothering to turn around, she responded without hesitation , “She’s dead.”
“Dead? What does ‘dead’ mean?” He asked.
“It means she left and she’s never coming back.”
~*~*~*~*~
“I wanted to believe Ms.Choi when she said they care for me. But the reality is that they don’t. They never did and perhaps never will. At least my mother showed up that one day. I didn't even catch a glimpse of my father until the next year. Even then, it was through a screen.” He chuckled weakly. Hyunjin looked down into his open palms blankly, continuing,“You know, I didn't even find out until middle school what it means for someone to be dead. ”
“For years, I hated the woman who saved my life because I had thought that she had chosen to abandon me.” He said, clenching his hands, his eyes closing as he tried to get rid of the images of his numerous fits of rage and his heart that used to burn with betrayal. Letting out a shaky breath, he looked up into Minho’s eyes, “You said she was there to save you right?”
“Honestly speaking, yes I’m happy she was able to save lives. Happy that she could be the saviour that people needed.” He said, running his hand through his long locks of black hair.
Gripping onto the ends of his hair, he choked out, “But where was she? No, where were they when I needed them?”
“After she left, a new nanny came in to replace her.”
~*~*~*~*~
“Hello, Hyunjin-ah. My name is Ms.Kim. I’m your new nanny from now on.” she said, smiling sweetly at him.
~*~*~*~*~
“She was really nice at first. I liked her quite a bit. She reminded me of Ms.Choi. But then she betrayed me too.” He flinched a bit as he recalled what she had done, his clear skin suddenly looking extremely displeasing to his own eyes.
~*~*~*~*~
“Hyunjin-ah, you have such a pretty face…” She said caressing his face. As he let out a shaky breath, tears in the corner of his eyes. Closing his eyes, accepting the fact that he couldn’t escape.
~*~*~*~*~
He couldn’t look any of them in the eyes, ashamed of himself. Hyunjin rubbed harshly on his skin until it turned a bright red, trying to get rid of the revolting layer that seemed to envelope his body, “When my mother found out all she did was fire her and throw me at a psychiatrist. She didn’t even bother hiring another nanny afterwards. She scolded me and said that it was too much of a hassle since all I was going to do was cause one issue after the next.”
Felix held onto his hand, stopping Hyunjin’s incessant rubbing, clenching it as he comforted him, “It’s okay…”
After taking a quick look at the rest who silently supported him with they’re understanding gaze,, he let out a small appreciative smile and continued, “I learnt a lot from that psychiatrist. Although evidently, it’s more hiding than anything else. I felt insecure, worthless even. And so I trained. I worked hard to become the perfect son. But even then they continued to neglect me. They never expected anything from me anyway.”
The blonde looked at him with a sad look, pausing before nudging his shoulder, smiling a bit at his new thought, “Well, in any case. You have us now. Most of us have never really had a family. So now we can make one of our own.”
“I like the sound of that.” Chan said, a huge grin plastered onto his face, “All of you are practically like my children anyway.”
“As if. I’d never call you my father.” Seungmin snarked, causing the rest of them to look up at him and pause. A couple of them burst out into laughter, the rest letting out small chuckles. They then made more jokes, “Yeah who would ever want to call him their dad.”
“Hey!” Chan exclaimed, being the only one who was slightly offended by the joke.
“What is it that hard to believe? Do you have some kind of a daddy kink or what?” Minho remarked, snickering. Once again, the room became filled with laughter. Chan, seeing this, sighed and shook his head, a small smile forming, thinking to himself, ‘Well, so long as they’re happy.’
After the laughter died down and they calmed themselves down, Jisung asked, “Right, who's next then? Or did everyone have a go?”
“No, no. Changbin still has to go.” Felix said.
Changbin was surprised and took a moment to think. His eyes turned darker, his voice turning serious, “So, when I was a kid, my older sister ate my pet goldfish, Dark.”