Chapter Text
Glee Group Chat
Tina: i am proud to finally do something that i’ve been waiting to do for over a year
Santana: quitting glee club???? about damn time
Artie: :( don’t like that joke
[Tina added Mike to the group chat]
Artie: YOOOOOOOO
Mike: Guess who no longer has a flip phone???
Quinn: FINALLY
Mercedes: Mike Chang!!!!
Rachel: This is amazing news.
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Michael Chang @mikechang98
Finally on Twitter :) don’t tell my mom
Sebastian Smythe @sebastard.official
@mikechang98 Do what people on Twitter do. Drop your most controversial takes…
Michael Chang @mikechang98
@sebastard.official Hmm… I need to think about it. I’ll post soon with my hottest take.
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Kurt and Sebastian’s Private Text Messages
Sebastian: Why is Mike taking so long
Kurt: Babe the man has had a smart phone for two hours you can’t just expect him to drop seriously controversial shit online… he’s probably still setting up all his accounts
Sebastian: Babe I come from a wealthy family I’ve never had to wait for anything ever
Kurt: Still undecided if I like or dislike how wealthy you are
Sebastian: It’s honestly a net zero, as far as boyfriend skills go
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Michael Chang @mikechang98
I don’t like wearing pants >:)
Michael Chang @mikechang98
I think that next week at Regionals the Warblers are going to do Sunday in New York, Danke Schoen, Beyond the Sea, and then Fly Me To The Moon :)
Michael Chang @mikechang98
I HATE brussel sprouts >:(
Michael Chang @mikechang98
Are these takes hot enough for you?
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Warblers Group Chat
Thad: Who the fuck is Mike Chang and why is everyone talking about him
Kurt: He’s from the New Directions
Wes: He’s not related to Tina, right?
Kurt: Nope, they’re exes
Wes: It’s really adventurous to date someone you share a last name with
Sebastian: He’s pretty cool
Sebastian: Chill guy, really good dancer
Thad: Well, he’s a chill guy who I’ve received eight separate text messages about his Twitter account
Thad: Someone’s saying I should report him to the Show Choir Board??
Kurt: What??
Thad: He has leaked 3/4ths of our set list
Sebastian: I think he’s just really good at predicting that sort of thing
Wes: We can’t just let someone leak our set list
Sebastian: I’m kinda too busy being impressed by how spot on he is
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Glee Group Chat
Rachel: Mike, if you keep up this social media rampage, you will get us booted from Regionals.
Mercedes: How did you guess it??
Mike: >:)
Santana: this man loves his emoticons
Mike: I just like that I don’t have to say anything online to get my point across, I just type in random punctuation and people get it
Artie: don’t dog on the man for using tone indicators
Tina: i’m enjoying the rampage.
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Mike’s Instagram
7:34
[image description: bathroom mirror picture of Mike]
[image description: nondescript selfie]
[image description: selfie with silly sunglasses]
[image description: screencap of a professional portrait of Mike]
COMMENTS:
Nickyhateschexmix: Oh show choir sage please tell us what Vocal Adrenaline will be performing
Dj.artie: [fire emoji] [fire emoji] [fire emoji]
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National Show Choir Board’s Facebook
Update: In today’s edition of announcements we never thought we’d have to make: Even if it was done via psychic ability, leaking another group’s setlist on social media can lead to disqualification.
COMMENTS:
Jesse St. James: National Show Choir Board punishing excellence once again
Artie Abrams: JUSTICE FOR MIKE
Wes Huang: Not sure how I feel about this.
Mercedes Jones: JUSTICE FOR MIKE
Tina Cohen-Chang: JUSTICE FOR MIKE
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Michael Chang @mikechang98
Stand up against injustice!
Thad Westerson III @thadrights
@mikechang98 how did you even know our setlist??
Michael Chang @mikechang98
@thadrights I just have a sense for that kind of thing
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National Show Choir Board’s Facebook
Update: After the uproarious response to a surprisingly unpopular ruling on psychic setlist predictions, we will be reviewing our policies.
COMMENTS:
Sebastian Smythe: JUSTICE FOR MIKE
Kurt Hummel: JUSTICE FOR MIKE
Thad Westerson III: What the heck???
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Glee Group Chat
Mercedes: Okay, I’ve been thinking about it, and this is the part I just can’t wrap my head around
Mercedes: One is a lucky guess, two is informed, but how did you know 3 of the songs???
Tina: maybe we’ve been so busy wondering if we could get Mike on social media that we never stopped to ask if we should
Finn: I’m pro-Mike on this one
Finn: They’re just trying to take down the talent
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Kurt and Sebastian’s Private Text Messages
Sebastian: What are the chances that Mike actually cheated instead of just being lucky with his guesses
Kurt: Super low
Kurt: I think he’s just psychic and nobody gave him the chance before
Kurt: He used to predict storms like a week in advance, but I just thought he was checking the weather
Sebastian: No Way
Sebastian: You’re fucking with me, right???
Kurt: Kinda wish I was
Kurt: But no, I’m dead serious
Sebastian: So you’re telling me that New Directions has singers, dancers, AND a psychic? We’re screwed
Kurt: We have singers and dancers in the Warblers
Sebastian: The psychic part really puts them over the top though
Kurt: I’m sorry that my old glee club is gonna kick our asses [crying emoji]
Sebastian: Don’t apologize, just wallow with me
Kurt: Okay, I’ll wallow
Kurt: Wallowwallowwallow
Sebastian: Wallow is such a funny word
Kurt: Right????
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National Show Choir Board’s Facebook
Update: In today’s second edition of announcements we never thought we’d have to make: If you can prove that the setlist leak was the source of psychic ability, no disqualifications will occur
COMMENTS:
Michael Chang: Hello NSCB! I will be emailing you proof that I had no prior knowledge.
Jesse St. James: This is what justice looks like
Brittany S. Pierce: I think that Vocal Adrenaline’s setlist will be centered around “The Continental” from the movie “The Gay Divorcee”
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Vocal Adrenaline Group Chat
Giselle Thomas: No.
Giselle Thomas: Fucking.
Giselle Thomas: Way.