Chapter Text
Reo has been cooped up in the shower for ages, and Seishiro is certain he’s majorly fucked up.
Seishiro didn’t use to dwell on people’s opinions of him before meeting the Mikage heir. Before bumping into Reo, Seishiro couldn’t picture a future for himself, much less conceive the concept of caring about a person outside of his family, but as he got to learn more and more about his partner, things that hadn’t been common for Seishiro began occurring regularly, yet unexpectedly.
Seishiro’s transition from a wandering ghost to a protagonist had been confusing, yet thrilling; complicated, yet intoxicating. His colorless world gradually expanded in ways he could have never imagined. His heart had been empty before, but yearning burned in it like a bonfire when he was with Reo. It was comfortable. It was fun. It still is, of course, but the striker has undeniably changed since those days.
It took him a while, but somewhere down the road Seishiro realized that he fell for the first friend he ever made. And how could he not? Reo is so, so kind. Reo is smart and funny. Reo always sees the best in Seishiro’s lazy ass. Reo treasures and believes in Seishiro. Reo is unwavering, loyal and willing to match Seishiro’s pace. Reo aspires to achieve his dream with his own strength instead of capitalizing on his family’s influence. Reo works extremely hard, despite being naturally brilliant at whatever he busies himself with.
Reo’s amethyst eyes light up when he’s enjoying himself. Reo’s expression when he comes up with a cunning scheme borders on naughty, but it simultaneously accentuates his boyish innocence. There’s also Reo’s genuine smile...Seishiro hasn’t witnessed a more beautiful sight in his nineteen-year-old existence.
Seishiro is powerless against all of what Reo is. Reo is Seishiro’s sun. So why is it that Seishiro keeps succumbing to mistakes when Reo is involved? Why does he keep upsetting Reo without intending to? Why did he conjure that stupid kissing farce? Why couldn’t he be satisfied with staying by Reo’s side as he’s done until now?
Seishiro slumps weakly into the leather couch, his blank gaze trained on the ceiling. “We’d regret if we continued?” He quizzically mutters to himself. Reo is probably correct, but that specific detail alone doesn’t alleviate the damage inflicted on Seishiro.
Ah…He nearly forgot. He was instructed to handle lunch. Perhaps, a delicious meal will boost Reo’s mood…
Just as the striker grabs his cell-phone from the living room table and is about to unlock it, it ignites with a new Line notification.
Chigirin: Spill it. What’s up with you and Reo?
Vaguely annoyed, Seishiro contemplates not answering. Why does he have to be reminded of his blunders over and over again? Seishiro’s reluctance aside though, the princess has been a great friend to both him and Reo since the Blue Lock project. The three of them have been through a lot of ups and downs together. Therefore, Seishiro knows that Chigiri isn’t meddling simply out of curiosity.
Begrudgingly, Seishiro submits his order and then pulls up the chat to reply.
Nagi: Why are you texting me and not Reo?
Chigirin: You’re the one I can’t figure out.
What’s that supposed to mean? Seishiro ponders darkly. He grits his teeth as he types his next message.
Nagi: What are you implying? I filled you in an hour ago, didn’t I?
Chigirin: Did you properly tell Reo that you love him?
Well, maybe not verbally, but…
Nagi: Not exactly. I was rejected before I could.
Chigirin: Are you an idiot? How can you be sure it’s not mutual if you haven’t confessed?
Chewing on his bottom lip, Seishiro considers Chigiri’s query for a few beats. He, too, had unconsciously arrived at the conclusion that Reo was in love with him once. Regardless of his own wariness about the essence of their connection, Seishiro could see that Reo treated him as someone special. Thus, he had naively presumed that Reo’s lack of reaction to his advances betrayed shyness. Looking back, he had been incredibly arrogant. Reo hadn’t been bashful; he had been detached.
Nagi: I’ve been showing it with my actions since forever ago. I kissed him. Multiple times! Reo’s either dangerously dense or pretending he doesn’t understand to spare my dignity.
Ugh…Seishiro can’t decide which alternative is worse even as he writes them down.
Chigirin: Why would Reo let you kiss him if he didn’t reciprocate?
Nagi: He thinks he’s helping me practice kissing…
Seishiro cringes internally at the conversation between him and his teammate. This entire affair is so dumb; it oddly resembles the plot of a cheesy romantic comedy. In Seishiro’s case, however, there might not be a happy ending.
Chigirin: Jesus. You’re a couple of pathetic losers.
Nagi: Don’t call Reo a pathetic loser.
Chigirin: Hey, genius. Are you raising the white flag? Where’s your usual assertiveness?
Nagi: Reo is out of my league…It’s a miracle he’s been tolerating a random, boring guy since high school. Plus, I’d rather not risk him avoiding me.
Or hating me. Seishiro mulls over elaborating on his irrational fears, but ultimately chooses not to. Reo wouldn’t hate him for such a reason. In truth, Seishiro knows Reo wouldn’t be cruel to him no matter what.
Chigirin: Isn’t Reo worth the risk? If you’re trying to be nice to him, your methods suck. For your information, when you put yourself down, you put Reo down along with you. I don’t appreciate you dissing my buddies.
Thumbs hovering over his phone, Seishiro stares at the device’s screen with wide, astonished eyes. Bearing his soul to Reo is definitely easier in theory, but something about Chigiri’s pep talk resonates firmly in Seishiro’s anxiety-consumed chest, driving away the shadows gathered there.
Nagi: You’re very persuasive. Thanks, missy.
Chigirin: Damn straight, be grateful! You owe me for this.
Nagi: Yep. If Reo agrees to marry me, you’ll find out before anybody else. Except for Choki.
Chigirin: Start with the dating stage of a relationship. I’m begging you.
His lips curling into a subtle smirk, Seishiro sets his phone aside and rises to his feet. He scampers towards the washroom Reo is occupying, his strides long and determined. He ought to strike while the iron’s hot.
“Reo, are you gonna wrap it up soon?” Seishiro questions softly as he knocks on the door separating him from the love of his life.
After a tense stretch of silence, Reo hesitantly pipes up. “Is the food here? The money for it is on the counter.”
Oh. Seishiro is being shunned. He wishes he hadn’t predicted this. “This isn’t about the food. Reo, please…”
Reo doesn’t immediately relent, and Seishiro grows increasingly concerned as the seconds tick by. He puffs out his cheeks with a heavy breath in a superficial attempt to maintain his composure.
“Fine,” Reo eventually murmurs before emerging from the bathroom. He’s sad because of you, Seishiro’s agitated mind weeps upon taking Reo in. Reo’s eyes are hollow and sunken, the skin around them raw. His nose is red and running; his brows are furrowed, knitting in the middle. Had Reo…Had Reo been crying?
Not bothering to examine the situation more thoroughly, Seishiro leaps towards the heir like a speeding bullet. He throws his arms around Reo, his hold as gentle as it is desperate. He leaves a lingering kiss on the crown of Reo’s head.
A wail erupts from Reo’s throat at that moment, trembling and conflicted and fragile. It’s enough to render Seishiro speechless. “Nagi, you can’t do this to me,” Reo sobs violently as he squirms in Seishiro’s embrace. “I’ll get the wrong idea!”
“Reo, listen to me,” Seishiro supplicates, forcing his partner to look directly at him. He cradles Reo’s tear-streaked face in his palms, clueless as to how to proceed. What should he do for Reo to stop crying? What should he do for Reo to smile? Is honesty really the right route? Would honesty bring Reo closer or freak him out further? What if Reo is suffering because of the earlier incident and a profession of love delivers the finishing blow?
Seishiro prays he’ll magically develop the necessary skills to articulate his point without wounding Reo more than he already has. “Listen to me...” He echoes gruffly instead, trailing off. So much for prayers. God is dead.
Reo brushes his slender fingers over Seishiro’s mouth, resting them there. It’s as if he’s apprehensive of whatever his treasure might be prepared to say. The solace of his touch contrasts painfully with the feeling that he’s tearing himself away from Seishiro. “It’s okay, Nagi. I’m listening.”
A giant chasm opens in Seishiro’s gut at the encouragement; it provides him with boundless bravery. What did he ever do to deserve Reo?
“I want Reo to share his worries with me. It’s okay if you can’t be calm. We’ll sort it out somehow. I’m not that dependable, but I’ll pay attention to every last word. So don’t go crying somewhere I can’t see you!”
There’s a brief pause, followed by another smothered sob as Reo’s arms fall limply to his sides. Lifting them to feebly push against Seishiro, Reo implicitly seeks space. Seishiro is convinced a stab through his abdomen would hurt less. “I can’t, Nagi. It’s not that I don’t trust you, but I–I’m terrified. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologize,” Seishiro coos, his own eyes stinging. Releasing a shaky sigh, he steels himself to be bold, consequences be damned. Floundering has only exacerbated the issue so far. “How about I do the talking? That was the original plan, anyway.”
“…Be my guest.”
Seishiro balls his hands into fists, a dull ache alerting him to the fact that he’s squeezing them a tad too tight. “Reo greeting me when I wake up each morning is all I need to go on living,” he unabashedly declares, overflowing with passion. Seishiro is confident he could sit there, rambling for eternity; he’s confident he could offer Reo his heart on a silver platter, and even that wouldn’t fully encompass the depth of his adoration. “Our kiss on the pitch…and every kiss after that…They weren’t a whim for me. I selfishly went along with the kissing practice bit, cause…because I’m in love with you, Reo.”
Frankly, Seishiro had envisioned a more romantic confession; one where he’s collected, one where Reo isn’t crying and, especially, one where they’re not both standing inches away from their toilet. Be that as it may, Seishiro is currently bursting with relief and a sense of serenity. Tucked away in a corner of their apartment, together in this ridiculous mess, it’s almost like the domestic atmosphere belongs solely to them.
Reo remains unresponsive for a while, his features contorting with a mix of many different emotions, some of which Seishiro doesn’t dare decipher. “Since when?” Reo finally asks, his tone inscrutable.
“Huh?”
“Since when have you been in love with me?”
Seishiro sneaks fleeting glances at the floor, suddenly deeming it more interesting than any game he’s ever played. “I can’t pin down when it started.”
Reo nods in acknowledgement. “Then, when did it click for you?”
“When we split up in Blue Lock.”
“We didn’t split up,” Reo jibes, glaring daggers at Seishiro. “You joined someone else’s group.”
Seishiro wilts. Was their fight still a sore spot? Had his explanations not been adequate for Reo? He hates to admit it, but this discussion is riding on his ability to appear reliable, a quality he’s unfortunately lacking in. “Reo…”
“Don’t sweat it,” Reo adds casually, perking up a little. “That was scummy of me. Revenge for you calling me a pain.”
You reap what you sow, that evil voice inside the prodigy jeers, mocking his resolve. Reo hasn’t uttered a single word about how he feels towards Seishiro, which is…not a good sign, but at least he hasn’t kicked Seishiro out of their house.
“Um, I love Reo,” Seishiro repeats lamely. “But I’m content with being your best friend. I’ll respect your–”
Reo scoffs wryly at that. “Ha? You can’t be serious.”
Seishiro startles, his brain short-circuiting. Is Reo angry? Is he abandoning Seishiro, after all? No, no, no. Seishiro won’t survive that degree of loneliness. He needs Reo. “Reo…You promised to stay.”
“Nagi?” Reo cuts in, evidently puzzled. “You’ve lost me.”
“Reo, you promised,” Seishiro presses on, unperturbed. He traps Reo between him and the nearby wall, keenly aware that he sounds like a broken record. “You promised me.”
“Seishiro!” Reo shouts, and the earth screeches to a halt on its axis. Did Reo just…? “You know I’ll stay with you. You know I love you, don’t you?”
“No…Reo didn’t say anything…” Seishiro whines miserably, fresh tears trickling down his face as one jolt after another surge through his body. He’s crushingly defeated and tremendously embarrassed to boot. He hasn’t cried this hard since he was a toddler.
Reo panics, his hands flailing before fastening around Seishiro. “Shh, it’s alright,” he soothes as if consoling a distressed child, hugging Seishiro close. “My bad. I thought I was being obvious. I didn’t realize...It’s my bad, so please don’t cry. I love you, Seishiro…”
Seishiro nuzzles Reo’s collar bone, his pent up frustration faintly subsiding. He hugs his partner back, reveling in the absolute verity that Reo is his home.
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“Man, I’m exhausted!” Reo exclaims from his position on Seishiro’s lap. The heir climbed onto Seishiro after the pair was done demolishing their lunch and he hadn’t moved since. Not that Seishiro is complaining; if Reo requested they literally meld together, the genius would have no objections.
“Saaaame,” Seishiro deliberately draws out the syllables as Reo attacks the former’s face with a barrage of doting pecks. Although Reo’s lips refuse to grace the place Seishiro wants them to land on the most, his kisses still put a soaring heat in Seishiro’s core.
Eyes shining with exhilaration, Seishiro tilts his head slightly to grant Reo better access to his neck. Reo gets the memo relatively quickly and begins marking down the length of Seishiro’s pulse, teeth nipping with tantalizing sweetness. In the aftermath of the gratifying tingles blooms a volley of hickeys.
As if to confirm that the love they had pledged to one another wasn’t a fragment of his imagination, Reo traces his fingertips around the shape of the brand new bruises. “I was afraid I was suffocating you with my affection,” he whispers hoarsely, clinging to Seishiro for dear life. “Are you sure I’m not too much for you?”
Seishiro pouts at the revelation and reaches for Reo in tandem. He loops one hand around his partner’s waist, caressing Reo’s cheek with the other. “I’d actually prefer it if Reo spoiled me more.”
Bouncing in his seat (a.k.a. Seishiro’s lap), Reo shoots the striker a radiant grin, his eyes sparkling with an electric spirit that illuminates the room, a vibrant reflection of his glee. “It’ll cost you,” he cackles mischievously. “I don’t roam around donating my devotion willy-nilly.”
“Eh? Isn’t receiving Reo’s coddling for free my privilege as your boyfriend?”
Seishiro isn’t joking, but Reo has the audacity to laugh at his perfectly valid argument. “I have a business to manage,” the midfielder boasts giddily. “Best I can do is give you a discount.”
Seishiro smiles indulgently at his and Reo’s banter, infected by his lover’s contagious energy. Winning against Reo might be an unfeasible feat for him. “Name your price, boss.”
“Infinite kisses!” Reo clarifies smugly in between giggles.
“Seems pretty cheap to me,” Seishiro reckons before leaning in to carry out his end of the bargain. Temporarily locked in their small haven as their limbs entangle on the sofa, the two athletes alternate between languid and hurried kisses.
Wow…so this is what kissing Reo without pretense is like, Seishiro marvels as his other half’s bangs dust his lashes. “Reo, I’m curious about something,” he pants against Reo’s mouth after a particularly intense kiss. The contact of their lips may have broken, but the warmth of Reo’s body throbbing above Seishiro’s doesn’t recede.
“What is it?” Reo probes with a huff, clearly not amused by Seishiro discontinuing their activities.
“You mentioned you were terrified. What did you mean?”
“I’m amazed you retained that, but it’s not important.”
“Reo has a habit of deflecting…”
At Seishiro’s observation, lines of resignation etch themselves in Reo’s gorgeous features. He heaves a sigh in surrender. “It scares me sometimes…the possibility of you secretly despising my dragging you around. Or of you…linking up with someone who excites you more than I do.”
“That would never happen,” Seishiro instantly rebukes, horrified by the prospect, but before he lays down his logic, he’s hit with flashbacks of himself being haunted by similar scenarios of Reo leaving him. It’d be hypocritical of him to dismiss Reo’s insecurities without hearing his partner out.
“It happened in Blue Lock,” Reo challenges, and Seishiro debates bawling again. If only he had communicated his resolution to Reo before walking away…If only he had controlled his temper…
“Reo, that’s not true.”
“Don’t make such a face,” Reo implores, his shoulders drooping dejectedly. “That’s me being paranoid.”
Reo has every right to be ‘paranoid’, Seishiro muses. If he were in Reo’s shoes, he’d be incapable of functioning as a human without constant reassurance. Seishiro crumbles under the mere hypothetical of Reo forsaking him. “It’s troublesome that I couldn’t cheer you up after we reunited.”
“Don’t blame yourself,” Reo pleads as he anxiously fiddles with Seishiro’s sleeve. “I noticed your efforts to erase my doubts, but I couldn’t bring myself to hope. That’s on me.”
“Nuh-uh, it’s not Reo’s fault. I’m the one who screwed up.” Seishiro had indeed been under the impression that nothing he did in favor of improving was wrong per se, but atoning for accidentally hurting Reo in the process is his responsibility.
“Haha, what are we even doing? Enough of that gloom and doom!” Reo states with an air of finality, swinging his arms. “Let’s focus on the here and now!”
Seishiro purses his lips. That’d be ideal, but something is still bugging him. He needs to know... “Did Reo cry during the second selection?”
“W-what? C’mon, who cares?” Reo squeaks, sheepishly averting his eyes. “That’s ancient history.”
So Reo did cry back then, too. Seishiro finds the notion to be sickening. “It’s a bummer I can’t punch my past self.”
“Quit overreacting!”
Poking Reo’s chin, Seishiro urges his boyfriend to meet his gaze. When Reo complies, Seishiro rests his temple against the heir’s. “When we were apart, I couldn't stop thinking about Reo,” he confides, no longer nervous about showing his cards. “I kept talking to you in my mind, that's how much I was missing you.”
Reo clamps a hand over his mouth, muffling an involuntary gasp. “Are you for real?”
“Yes. I'm sorry I’m late in expressing myself. How can I make it up to you, Reo?”
“Celebrate my birthday with me.”
That’s it? “I was already planning on doing that,” Seishiro protests, exasperation settling in and substituting the fading shock. “Reo should follow my example and be greedier.”
“Hmm, in that case...I demand flowers for my present,” Reo practically sings, failing to sound intimidating. “I can’t picture you holding a bouquet.”
“Anything for you, sir.”
“You should also write me a letter and go on an official date with me.”
“Mhm, whatever Reo wants,” Seishiro hums happily before diving in to lap up Reo’s jaw. A sense of purpose compels him to lavish Reo with slow, fervent kisses.
“And...Your actions have been speaking volumes, but...you should periodically spell it out for me...that you...love me. Or would that be a hassle?”
Reo’s voice quivers as he drops one hell of a bombshell, and it’s downright sinful how oblivious he is to Seishiro’s inner turmoil. All that patience has been in vain. “Marry me, Reo.”
“Pardon?”
“Let's buy the rings tomorrow.”
“Wait!” A disoriented yelp escapes Reo, but even that is music to Seishiro’s ears. “Are you seriously asking me to marry you? It’s been approximately forty-five minutes since we confessed!”
“What's the problem? Our promise has always been about being together forever.”
“Not fair,” Reo groans, and Seishiro basks in the fondness he discerns in the jab. “You're not being fair, Sei.”
Seishiro’s heart thunders against his rib cage before packing its bags and flying off to the heavens; what’s not fair is Reo addressing him by his first name or any diminutive of it. “I wanna take Reo to bed...” Seishiro mumbles under his breath, his words wistful in his bliss.
“Huh? I didn't catch that.”
“I said that Reo is cute.”
“…You're the cute one, dummy.”
(Despite prior advice from Chigiri, Seishiro had proposed to Reo six times by the next day’s dawn.)