Chapter Text
Olivia never forgot her partner’s kindness when Serena died. They never talked about it afterwards, but it left its mark on her and their partnership.
Throughout the years - even when they found themselves on shaky ground - if one of them was in need of support, the other always showed up. That’s why Olivia finds herself outside a Queens dive bar at 2 a.m. on a Tuesday in May. It’s been a week since she’s seen him, and he’s refusing to take her calls or respond to her messages.
She had been shocked when she received a phone call from his wife earlier this evening. “He’s not okay, Olivia. He won’t talk.”
“He’s not answering my calls, Kathy. I’ve tried. I don’t know what else I can do.”
“He’s at Last Call in Kew Gardens. He’s spent more time there than at home this week.” Olivia hears the annoyance in Kathy’s voice, and she gets it - but she also knows Kathy has no idea what Elliot is going through. Not really. She wouldn’t understand even if he had been talking to her.
“I’ll see what I can do, Kathy, but I don’t know that it will do any good.”
“Thanks, Olivia. Eli and I will be at my mothers, but please let me know how it goes.”
After hanging up the phone, Olivia shut her computer down for the evening and grabbed her keys. She made the drive to Queens not knowing what she would find. She had a guess, but she wouldn’t believe it until she got there and saw him for herself.
Opening the door and taking a step inside, Olivia immediately spots him at the far end of the bar, elbows propped on the edge with his head resting in his hands. She watches him for a few moments before approaching him.
“El?”
He lifts his head and looks at her with red-rimmed eyes. “Liv? What are you doing here?” His words slur together slightly, but not overly so. He may have been here all day, but he’s not been drinking the whole time. Not heavily anyway. That’s a pleasant surprise.
“Kathy called me. She’s…concerned, El. She says you’ve not been talking to her either.” He scoffs and looks away.
“What does she expect me to say? ‘Hey, honey. Killed a kid at work today. How was your day?’”
She places her hand on his shoulder and gives it a light squeeze. “It was a good shoot, El. I mean, it was awful - it was - but you didn’t have another choice.” She pauses, and he doesn’t say anything. Doesn’t look at her. “ Why don’t you let me take you home?”
He just looks at her and shakes his head. “I can’t. She’ll try to make me talk about it, but I can’t.”
“She’s not there.” His face somehow falls even further, but she keeps going. He needs to know. “She took Eli and went to her mother’s place.” She sees a tear fall.
“Fine. Let’s go.” He pulls out his wallet and throws a few bills down, striding past her with surprising steadiness.
She catches up with him at the door and directs him to her car. The first few minutes of the drive are silent. Then, he mumbles, “She say when she’ll be back?”
“No, El, she didn’t.” She glances over quickly before returning her eyes to the road in front of her. “She didn’t say it was for good, though.”
“Whatever.”
As Olivia pulls up in front of his house and he reaches for the door handle, she places her hand on his shoulder again briefly. “Elliot, listen to me.” He slowly turns his body in her direction. “I’m worried, too. I think you need to talk to someone.”
“I’m not talking to a shrink.”
She raises her hands in semi-surrender. “That’s fine. It doesn’t have to be a shrink. Maybe your priest? Or -” She waits until he looks at her, fighting back the tears welling in her eyes. It only takes a second. “Me?”
He shrugs a shoulder in response. “You - you want to come in? The hell am I talking about? You should get home. It’s late, and-”
She places a hand on his forearm. “If you want to talk and want me here, then I’m where I need to be.”