Chapter Text
And there I was, laying like a fool in my bed. I only had the strength to put on a pair of pajama pants and a white tank top. I felt exhausted before my shower, but now, it was like my whole body was ready to pass through another day. My eyes were open wide, staring at the ceiling as I held his mask. Ghost's mask.
I didn't know why I couldn't sleep. Maybe it was the fact that I kept playing our interaction in my head, or maybe I just questioned why he left his mask on that bench. I gripped the mask in my hand before turning in my bed. "... should I return it ? What if he's waiting for me ?" I told myself as I sat in my bed. I almost felt happy before telling myself, "... No, it's too late. He's probably sleeping."
I sighed loudly and layed down again, turning and turning around. "Why am I so obsessed with that stupid mask ? Why is he so obsessed with that thing ?... it's not that cool anyway..." I thought as I closed my eyes tight, trying to sleep.
"... Okay, it is fucking cool. But now I just need to sleep." I thought as I turned. I faced my door and looked at it, like at any moment Ghost himself would appear to take back the mask. I sighed once again before sitting up in my bed.
-... Fuck it.
I said as I got up. I groaned loudly, was I really going to go to Ghost's room in the middle of the night just to hand him back his stupid mask ?
A few minutes later, I was standing in front of Ghost's room.
... To answer my previous question, yes, yes I did.
I prepared my fist to knock at the door but froze. "Should I really do it ?" I sighed before wincing my face, trying to bring up the courage I needed. Why am I so obsessed about handing him his mask ? I could leave it at his door, or-
Before I knew it, the door opened. I stood, completely frozen in front of Ghost. He was wearing some black pants and a black shirt with a V-neck. He crossed his arms on his chest as he looked at me with his green eyes. He looked... more... how to say... soft ?
-... You're loud, even when you don't speak.
His low voice startled me. It wasn't like always, not as cautious, not as quick like it usually was. It was more low, even sounding…calm ?
He moved to the side, was he inviting me in ? "Fuck this, this night couldn't get weirder... right ?" I thought as I entered his room. I raised an eyebrow when I saw how empty it was. Just a bed, an open closet with uniforms and gear and a desk. No photos, no posters on the wall, the only noticeable thing was all the paper scattered on his desk.
He closed the door and sat in the chair at his desk. I looked at him before looking for somewhere to sit. I decided to go sit on the corner of his bed.
It was incredibly awkward, just me, sitting on Ghost's bed while he looked at me from the chair. I completely forgot that I was holding his mask in my hand, and that it was why I was here in the first place.
-... Can I tell you something Johnny ?
I got startled by his voice, and his sudden question surprised me even more. Usually he would just say what he has to say, what is he up to ?
-... Yea... Go for it.
I said, not really sure of what to expect from him. Even though he may appear like his usual cold and composed self, he seemed to be... nervous ?
He took a deep sigh before looking at me, did he not know how to express what he wanted ?
-... I'm gonna say this for the sake of the missions. This is not a... weird stupid... book thing. This is real life.
He said as he almost seemed angry by himself and his thoughts.
-... Unh-hu.
I said, actually just wanting to scream "GET TO THE POINT."
-... Just-...
He looked at me before taking a deep breath. He closed his eyes slowly before reopening them again.
-... Sleep next to me.
He asked.
"... What ? Why ? Who ? What the fuck ? Ghost ? Me ? Ya bloody muppet, yer playing a trick on me. Really ? I mean... What is happening ? We could cuddle. Why me ? Unh !? Bloody Ghost asking me that ?" Was all the thoughts I had at the same time. But-
-... Yea. Sure.
Was my response. He looked at me like I was crazy, like he thought I would refuse. Maybe he was even startled by the fact that I didn't even ask questions. Me. The one always talking and asking.
But deep down I knew that if he asked me such a thing, it was probably for a good reason.
We looked into each other's eyes for a few minutes, just sitting awkwardly there, when suddenly, he got up. His hands on his knees, he pushed himself up while making a small groan. He looked at me before saying.
-... It's late. We need sleep.
I just nodded at him, not really sure if I was dreaming (maybe it was even a nightmare) or if it was really happening. I looked at him walk and set the light down before turning to face me. We stared at each other before I slowly got under the covers of the bed, laying on my side, keeping my eyes on him. His bed was small, how are we even gonna fit ? Well, this question probably didn't matter for Ghost since he walked toward the bed before laying down beside me. I looked into his eyes as he frowned his eyebrows.
-... Are you gonna stare at me all night ?
He asked.
-... What ? Ya want me to be the little spoon ?
I returned on a teasing and playful tone. He rolled his eyes before turning in the bed, making it creak and move. The bed was so small that my body was pressed against his. My torso on his back, my nose almost touching the back of his head... Fuck. What are we even doing ?
-... Ghost... Yer mask smells bad, when's the last time ya washed it ?
-... Is it a trick to make me take it off ?
- Maybe.
-...
I heard him ruffle around before slowly taking off his mask. I stared at the back of his head, his hair still damp tickling my nose. I smiled before moving lower, I moved until my nose was almost touching the back of his neck. I then moved my hands, it couldn't be weirder than that, so I might as well enjoy it.
-... Soap.
- Ghost.
-... Why are you hugging me ?
- I'm not hugging ya, the bed's too small. I'm scared of falling.
-...
-... Do you hate it ?
-... Just-... Don't hold me like that.
I felt a bit awkward as I took my hands from him. I only realized how stiff he was when he slowly started to relax. I saw his shoulder slowly lower and his breath steady. I thought I had completely ruined the moment since he didn't say anything for a while, that was until he moved a bit. He pressed the back of his body closer to mine before letting out a small groan. Was he pouting that I had defeated the big bad Ghost ? Or maybe happy that I saw behind his mask. In any case, he didn't speak again.
Unconsciously, I held his mask in my hand for the whole night, keeping it close to my chest, stopping me from hugging or at least touching Ghost. Why was he so bothered by my hands while he was so close to me ? And I know, I just know how touch starved this man must be, so why ? Should we... talk about it ?... Maybe tomorrow. I knew he wasn't sleeping, but he didn't speak again. I fell asleep a couple of minutes after it, too tired to do anything else.