Chapter Text
Sunwoo watches Haknyeon tightly shut his eyes as he holds onto his shoulder and turns pink. He resists the urge to smile, afraid that doing so would ruin the moment.
Cute.
To be honest, Sunwoo doesn't know exactly how it happened, but he will always remember when he finally realized that he was developing romantic feelings for his fake fiancé.
It happened a little bit over two months ago.
The younger had been swamped with work for almost two weeks, and it was taking a toll on him. He would come home late at night—drained and exhausted. And although it wasn't an obligation of some sort, he still felt guilty each time he texted Haknyeon that he would be coming home late and that he shouldn't wait for him.
It was probably because they were getting closer, that they were bonding more, and that he didn't want the older to lose sleep because of him. Sunwoo didn't want Haknyeon to get sick because of him.
And Haknyeon, being the thoughtful person he is, still ended up cooking dinner enough for the two of them and would leave it out for Sunwoo when he came home from the office.
The older had caught on to Sunwoo's habit of not eating after lunch because he gets so immersed in his work.
It wasn't just the cooked food that would make Sunwoo's mood lighter after a tough day. It was also the small post-it notes covered in poorly drawn animals that came with the food that made Sunwoo grin.
Gradually, Sunwoo realized that he would rush home from the office, sometimes dropping hints that he hadn't eaten much, looking forward to seeing what misshapen animal was the victim of the post-it for the day.
One day, the younger came home past one in the morning.
Sunwoo wanted nothing more than to take a hot shower, wear comfy clothes, and fall asleep on his warm bed, especially after what happened earlier that day.
It was the first time the two had gotten into a disagreement.
Haknyeon had mentioned to his best friend, Kevin, their arrangement. Sunwoo had gotten upset because they agreed not to tell anyone else about their fake relationship. Although Haknyeon kept saying that he trusted his best friend and that he wouldn't tell a single soul, it didn't put Sunwoo's mind at ease.
No matter who it is, there's still a possibility of words being accidentally said.
Harsh words were thrown back and forth, causing Haknyeon to storm out of the house and Sunwoo to bury his nose even more with work.
The younger knew that he wouldn't get any deformed, mysterious animal on a post-it that night.
None to add to his growing collection that was beginning to pile up in the drawer of his bedside table.
-----
Flashback.
Two and a half months ago.
As soon as Sunwoo entered the house, locking the front door, his feet immediately brought him to the kitchen out of habit.
His fingers skimmed along the marbled counter as he sighed.
Sunwoo stared at the food Haknyeon had saved for him, sitting in a glass container on the counter.
Lips dropped into a deeper frown as the lack of tiny orange post-its confirmed that they were still not on good terms based on earlier.
'Well, what do you expect, Sunwoo?' He mumbled to himself.
Not bothering to even heat up the food or sit down, Sunwoo grabbed a spoon and began to devour the home-cooked meal. As he stared at the once-full bowl, he decided to take care of the dirty dishes later—desperately wanting to get out of his dirty clothes.
He trudged straight to the sink and into his bathroom.
The younger took his time, making use of the warm water pelting on his skin to relax and to think about how he was going to apologize or make it up to Haknyeon.
It was during his shower thoughts that Sunwoo realized that he didn't like making the older upset, that he didn't like the sadness in his eyes, that he only wanted to see him smiling, and that he would very much like to do nothing but make him smile.
But of course, this thought doesn't faze or confuse Sunwoo.
He knew he had a soft spot for the older, but it was nothing more than that. He saw him as someone younger than him, which is ironic considering that he's the younger one between them.
Sunwoo knew from the start that there was something that compelled him to want to take care of Haknyeon.
Thus, he brushed a lot of feelings off as that.
After his long shower, he went back to the kitchen and cleaned the dishes. It was only after he dried his hands that Sunwoo heard the soft noise coming from the living room.
The younger slowly walked into the living room. He immediately spotted his (fake) boyfriend curled up in the corner of their couch, wrapped in a bright neon orange blanket that he had gotten for him as a 'welcome to my house' kind of gift.
At first, Sunwoo couldn't help but smile at the older, maybe even chuckle a bit at how adorable he thought he was.
It was short-lived when he realized how late it was.
Sunwoo's smile turned into a definite pout when the thought of Haknyeon waiting for him to come home entered his mind.
Guilt began to sink in further when Sunwoo approached the older and saw his pink, puffy eyelids.
'Was he crying?' Sunwoo whispered to himself. 'Is it because of me?'
Exhausted and ashamed, Sunwoo didn't let himself ponder on those kinds of thoughts even further—knowing that it wouldn't be good for him. Instead, he shifted his thoughts to debating whether or not he would wake up Haknyeon or carry him to his room.
Sunwoo tried to wake Haknyeon up, but the older must have been so tired from work (and from crying) that Sunwoo shook his head and decided to go with the latter option—carry Haknyeon to his bed.
It wasn't a struggle for Sunwoo. In fact, as soon as he picked him up, the older instantly nestled his head into Sunwoo's neck as if out of habit.
Sunwoo took a few steady breaths at a time while he held Haknyeon in his arms—scared that even breathing would wake him up.
While he carefully brought Haknyeon into his room, Sunwoo tried so hard to keep himself together. However, with the older close to his neck and his lips touching his skin, it was inevitable for Sunwoo to end up with rosy-pink cheeks as he set Haknyeon down on the mattress.
Sunwoo didn't think it through.
He only thought of carrying Haknyeon back to his bed, and that was it. He wasn't sure what to do right after.
Should he keep the door closed or slightly ajar? Did Haknyeon sleep with his lamp on? Is he supposed to tuck him in? Is he even allowed to be in Haknyeon's room in the first place despite it being his house?
As he debated with himself, he spotted an orange post-it and a black marker on Haknyeon's bedside table. He slowly picked up the small square, and his lips gradually curled up into a smile.
There, on the post-it, was a badly drawn llama. The only way for Sunwoo to recognize it was a llama because of its long neck and fur.
Sunwoo softly chuckled.
He flipped the post-it and saw a short note for him. It was an 'I'm Sorry' with a small sad face at the end.
And with that, Sunwoo knew exactly what he needed to do to make it up to Haknyeon.
Sunwoo folded the note and put it in his pocket. He turned his attention back to Haknyeon, and pulled the duvet over his body.
As Haknyeon curled up into the pillows, Sunwoo couldn't help but sit on the edge of the bed and move the older's hair away from his face. Doing so compelled him to do another thing he probably shouldn't be doing—Sunwoo leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on Haknyeon's forehead.
Right then and there, everything that Sunwoo thought he had felt completely turned 180°.
Sunwoo's feelings towards Haknyeon had changed—from what was far from being romantic, to brushing off his feelings as friendly, and to finally crossing the border of friendship into something more intimate.
Everything made much more sense to him now.
Why Sunwoo looked forward to coming home after a day in the office. Why he kept Haknyeon's silly drawings in a box in his bedside table. Why he drove two hours to buy the chicken Haknyeon was craving, and when the older asked him why he got it, all Sunwoo could say was 'Just because'. Why he immediately snaps photos of restaurants or dishes and then sends them to Haknyeon. Why Sunwoo has a protective instinct toward the older. Why he wants nothing more than to make Haknyeon smile and goes out of his way to do so, even if it meant losing games on purpose. Why Sunwoo has to resist the urge to buy every damn plushie he sees, all because it reminds him of Haknyeon. Why he never feels like he has to pretend when it came to public displays of affection. Why it feels so natural for Sunwoo to hold Haknyeon's hand or by his waist. And why he felt so guilty and sad seeing Haknyeon's eyes red and puffy.
Surprised and flustered by his own epiphany, he jolted and sat back up with a blush. His movements caused the bed to bounce and the older to shift in his sleep.
Sunwoo hurriedly and quietly left Haknyeon's room and retreated back to his own to bury his face in a pillow.
-----
Ever since then, Sunwoo has been keeping any sort of romantic feelings he has for Haknyeon under wraps.
It was a good thing he knew how to separate his feelings. Well, most of the time.
Sunwoo can't deny how hard it is—sad even—for him to pretend for the sake of avoiding an arranged marriage. Other times, all Sunwoo wants to do is proclaim his sincerity to the older. But, of course, it could potentially ruin the plan and the friendship they had finally established.
He couldn't see his life without Haknyeon anymore. And that is why he'd rather settle for being nothing more than Haknyeon's younger dongsaeng, whom Haknyeon was doing a favor for.
But something about tonight felt different.
Maybe it was because of their fake engagement party, and they had to look "in love" for longer than usual. Maybe it's because Sunwoo didn't have to pretend at all, and it messed with his head. Or maybe, just maybe, it's because Haknyeon possibly feels the same way as him.
It's hard not to think of the possibility that Haknyeon may reciprocate Sunwoo's growing feelings, especially when the older is holding onto him as if he were going to disappear.
With Haknyeon in his arms, their bodies pressed up together, and Haknyeon's flustered reaction, Sunwoo begins to believe in that possibility.
He tucks the older's hair behind his ear and cups his cheek, angling it upward.
Haknyeon kept his eyes squeezed shut, almost too hard, causing Sunwoo to softly chuckle at how cute he was.
Maybe he doesn't have feelings for me now, but it's not impossible.
And with the sliver of hope that Sunwoo clings onto, he throws all of his worries and doubts out the window as he closes in the distance between their faces.
Sunwoo's lips touch Haknyeon's forehead ever so softly. And as he slowly lets go of the older who is beet red at this point, he gives him a gentle smile and runs his thumb across his cheek.
Despite the desperate want and urge to finally kiss Haknyeon on his lips, Sunwoo wanted to let Haknyeon feel his deep love, respect, and sincerity by leaving a kiss on his forehead instead.
"Sleep well, hyung." He bids him good night, increasing the distance between them.
Sunwoo turns his heel and makes his way out of the kitchen. He doesn't take a second look at the older knowing that if he did, he wouldn't be able to stop himself any further.
I'll continue to take care of you while I wait for you.
The younger made his way down the hallway, nearing the stairs up to the bedrooms. Right as he nears the bottom of the stairs, he is suddenly pulled back.
The only thing that Sunwoo was able to see right before everything was Haknyeon, still beet red, pulling him close until their bodies were pressed together once more.
On the tips of his toes, Haknyeon brazenly wraps his arms around Sunwoo's neck and leaps forward to kiss him.
Sunwoo was quick to catch the older in his arms despite losing his balance for a bit, as if his top priority was Haknyeon's safety rather than his own.
As soon as Sunwoo regained his footing, his heart began to beat faster in his chest. Tingles shoot up from his spine to his neck and face, turning just as red as the other.
Is this really happening?
Sunwoo shakes off his worries and succumbs to the moment—into Haknyeon. He lets the older lead the kiss and relishes the feeling of his lips against his.
His hands start to wander along the older's top, finding their way underneath. Doing so causes Haknyeon to softly gasp, allowing Sunwoo to (carefully) back him up against the wall and take charge.
Sunwoo takes the opportunity to slip his tongue into Haknyeon's mouth—deepening the kiss.
The two get lost in each other. They couldn't care less about their teeth clashing from time to time as they kissed. All they knew was that they needed more of each other.
Haknyeon's hands find their way into Sunwoo's hair, gently tugging it and eliciting soft, approving groans from the younger.
Fuck.
Hands from the two grabbed and tugged whatever they could.
When Sunwoo's hand skims against the band of Haknyeon's bottoms, the older instinctively wraps a leg around the younger's waist. He roughly, yet still carefully, pushes the older up against the wall and squeezes his plump butt, making Haknyeon whine under his touch.
From needy, passionate kisses, it soon died down into soft, gentle ones as they caught their breath.
Haknyeon lowers his head, rests his forehead against Sunwoo's, and holds onto his shirt like earlier in the kitchen.
Sunwoo, on the other hand, keeps his hand against the small of Haknyeon's back and looks up at the ceiling while biting his bottom lip to prevent him from breaking out into a smile.
As Sunwoo feels Haknyeon move his head, he immediately meets his gaze with flushed cheeks and swollen lips.
The older plants his hands on Sunwoo's chest and lets out a sigh. He goes up on his toes again and gives the younger a kiss on the cheek before shyly smiling at him.
"Good night, Sunwoo."
With that, Sunwoo allows Haknyeon to retreat back to his room. He couldn't help but break into a goofy smile and a soft chuckle when Haknyeon peered over his shoulder with a mischievous look in his eyes in contrast to his shy smile.
I guess I don't have to wait that long anymore.