Chapter Text
Draco apparated straight into the entry hall at Grimmauld. At least the wards weren’t closed to him yet, he thought with grim satisfaction, even as he plotted murder by dismemberment of the vixen who’d dared to lay his paws on Harry.
If Draco had his doubts about Blaise’s tale, they were dispelled by the shocked and baffled look on Kreacher’s face. There wasn’t much that could get the ancient elf to react, so this was as good as proof that Harry had something to hide. Since Kreacher’s eyes had shifted shadily in the direction of the small dining room that led to the hall with the stairs to Harry’s bedroom, that’s where Draco rushed without waiting for the treacherous elf to make some excuse for his master.
The first thing he saw was the dining table set for two. There was a vase of red roses, candles, plates with a full set of cutlery, and an expensive bottle of wine. Draco looked upon the setting with a bitter feeling. Harry had never set a table for dinner with him. Every time he had eaten at Grimmauld, it had been an incredibly casual event with either Harry and him cooking together and then eating in the kitchen, or consuming muggle takeouts out of plastic containers while sitting on the carpeted floor of the lounge. Not that he didn’t like or even prefer how they did it, but it hurt thinking Harry had put in all this effort for someone else.
The ground floor seemed empty, so he rushed up the staircase to Harry’s bedroom, hoping to catch the wicked couple red handed before the darned elf had a chance to warn them. Draco’s heart beat heavy in his chest and though he was high on adrenaline and teeming with visions of violence, he knew he would be lying to himself, if he pretended that underneath it all didn’t lie a stubborn hope that it was all just a giant misunderstanding.
The door to Harry’s bedroom was open but there was no one inside. The bed was unmade and as Draco came closer he realized with horror that there was a strain of musky smell that wasn’t Harry’s. Before he had a chance to search for foreign hair on Harry’s pillow, he heard a sound from the ensuite. He strode towards it and put his ear against the closed door. Someone was giggling. Harry. Harry was giggling. “Stop,” Draco heard him say. “You’re tickling me. Haha I said stop, you brute.”
Draco felt a lump in his throat, as he realized that all his hopes were destroyed. Harry had betrayed him. And yes, maybe Draco hadn’t been the best boyfriend and as open with his feelings as he should have, but he didn’t deserve this. He wanted to disappear. To get back home and fall into his bed and shut everyone and everything out. But no, he thought as he wiped angry tears from his eyes, he deserved better. He would confront Harry right then and there and maybe let lose a hex or two, to hell with the consequences.
Draco opened the door to the bathroom. He had meant to slam it open, but his hands were shaking and it opened softly. Harry was in the bathtub, his back towards Draco, but there was no one with him. He was taking a bubble bath and the foam was up to his chest. Draco had a sudden unholy thought of Harry’s date doing profane things under the foam. He couldn’t do this. Draco had thought he could confront Harry, but he really couldn’t. Not when his heart was breaking into a million pieces.
He turned to leave, but his sight caught at Harry lifting his arms. He was holding something. Something squiggly and long, it climbed up Harry’s shoulder and Draco realized with a start that it was a ferret. A white ferret. In the bath with Harry. Draco watched speechlessly, as Harry lifted it back into his embrace. “Would you like some more caviar?” Harry asked the ferret who was now comfortably settled in the nook between Harry’s arm and shoulder. He then proceeded to feed the ferret what was supposedly caviar and then scratch it behind its ears, all the while smiling at it like the ferret had hung the moon. For its own part, the ferret looked like the most self-satisfied animal in the world, enjoying a bubble bath and Harry’s warm embrace, gulping down delicacies, while soft music played on the wizarding radio and scented candles lit up every corner of the bathroom.
Objectively, Draco should have found the whole situation ridiculous and funny, and on some intellectual plane he did. At the sight of Harry with this imposter ferret though, his animal instincts came to the fore. Before he knew it, he had transformed and was running to attack the creature who had dared to take Draco’s place.
Harry was enjoying a relaxed morning date with his boyfriend one second, and the very next something small hit his arms with the speed of lightning. He was too taken by surprise to hold onto Draco and cried in alarm as his ferret boyfriend was knocked off his arms and into the water.
In vain, he scrambled for Draco in the foamy water, but his fingers had barely touched a furry back when it was yanked away by something ferocious. He climbed out of the tub and drained the water, aiming his wand at the threat. Draco was yowling, squirming to get away from the grip of….another Draco?? Much to Harry’s bewilderment there were two fully soaked, foam covered white ferrets grappling around at the bottom of the tub.
“Draco?” he called out, looking from one to the other. “Draco?”
Neither of the ferrets paid him any mind, too busy trying to bite each other. Harry’s instinct was to pull them apart, but he immediately thought better of sinking his hands into the mess of wet fur, teeth and claws. Somehow the ferrets managed to clamber out of the tub and after a quick chase disappeared behind a cabinet.
There was the sound of shuffling and a sharp cry before silence reigned again. Harry, who had stood paralyzed for a moment, quietly panicking over the status of his relationship if he failed to recognize the real Draco, got himself to move and peer behind the cabinet.
Two sets of bright little eyes gazed back at him. One ferret lay flat and prostate on the ground and the other was sort of standing on him, biting his neck. The one on the ground locked eyes with Harry and softly but pitifully yowled at him. Harry had flashbacks of all the other situations he had rescued Draco from – Draco looking distressed while the crazy squirrel baby hung to his tail, Draco hiding behind the bins in the back alleys of Diagon while Mr. Mumbles prowled looking for him, Draco chased by rats….but that last one wasn’t really Draco, was he? He groaned internally, as he came to the realization that he had been having a romantic date and cuddling with a random wild animal. It had seemed like Draco at first, on account of being a white furred ferret and present at an expected time and place. But now that the real ferret Draco was in the room, Harry cringed at himself for persisting with the mistaken belief despite not having felt the instant connection that was now palpable.
With a wordless spell, Harry levitated the offending ferret away and out of the bedroom. He carefully cradled the other, examining him for bites. After being satisfied that no physical harm had been done, he put him back into the now empty bathtub. He had half a mind to beg him to change back, telling him he was holding off all further apologies till Draco was human again. But looking at him, a wee soaked, shivering ferret with adorable ears, and the cutest tiny paws, and boopable little snout, Harry was filled with a warm feeling and he found himself content just hanging on to the edge of the bathtub, smiling sappily at the little darling.
There was a flash and his human boyfriend was suddenly back, still wet and shivering, hair sticking out in all directions. “Look,” said Harry, holding up his hands. “Before you get mad-” The rest of his words were swallowed in a kiss as Draco grabbed him by the collar and pulled him into the tub.
“I’ll be your adorable little ferret,” murmured Draco when they finally broke off their kiss. “You can even put a bow on me, or carry me in your pocket. Just promise me you’ll never bring another ferret home again.”
“Never!” exclaimed Harry with a wide sunny grin. “Though in all fairness, I thought that was you.”
“And so, you proceeded to take a bath with it?”
“Well, I wasn’t initially planning to get into the tub with him,” said Harry sheepishly. “I wanted to spoil him…you I mean. I thought you’d maybe like to relax with a bubble bath and I err…lit some candles…some music. I had caviar and champagne as you can see, but obviously you couldn’t drink that while you were a ferret.”
“Obviously,” smirked Draco.
“I, errr, got you some flowers too,” Harry blushed. “Tulips, which you like, but he just chewed on a couple and ignored them after that.”
“And you still couldn’t tell it was a real animal you were dealing with? Because eating flowers is just so me?”
“Well, I thought you were giving me attitude. Not…not that I didn’t deserve it.” Harry took a deep breath. “What with me calling you a rat and all that. I’ve since been corrected. By multiple people. Also, I’m sorry for not believing you about Sir…..ummm Sir Bonbon.”
Draco snorted. “That’s not what you called him last time.”
“Uhhh BubbleBottom? Actually, that makes sense because I was associating him with you.”
Harry yelped when Draco pinched him on the thigh. “It’s Beauberbottern. And you’re forgiven, for the things you just mentioned. Although, I don’t know if I can forgive you for thinking that ferret was me. For an entire day no less. Accio ferret.” The other ferret came flying through the air and into Draco’s arm, who proceeded to examine it from all angles. He exclaimed at something and smacked Harry on the arm. “It’s not even a male ferret you idiot. It’s a female ferret. I can’t believe you thought this female ferret was me!” He smacked Harry again.
“Owww!” cried Harry. “Right. The first thing I should have done upon coming across a ferret that looked like my boyfriend is check its genitalia.”
Draco mock glared at him for a second, before his gaze softened. “Actually, I wanted to apologize to you as well. For mentioning your dad in that stupid argument. Just a few minutes after disapparating yesterday, I came to the realization of how awful I was being, but the day unraveled down in the Ministry and I didn’t get a chance to do anything about it. Sometimes I say mean things, Harry, without even meaning them. It’s a hangup from my awful school days. I’m sorry. Also, you were right. Ferret me does have a tendency to get set upon by other animals.” He laughed with self-depreciation. “I’ve got to work on my animal reflexes. I don’t mind you rescuing me though. My hero.”
Harry wrapped Draco in a tight embrace. “Thank Merlin! I thought I had offended you with all that talk about you getting bullied by other animals, and that you were refusing to turn back because of that. I was so frantic yesterday. Oh! That reminds me, we should send Hermione a gift basket or something. She got attacked by that awful cat because I insisted that she help me get you out of the rat situation. Mr. Mumbles is awful,” he groaned. “I’m also sorry I downplayed how awful he is.”
“The rat situation? Dare I ask?” Draco raised his elegant eyebrow.
“I thought I saw you being chased by rats in Knockturn Alley,” mumbled Harry.
“Harry!” Draco smacked him on the arm yet again. “I know I just said I won’t get offended by all that ferret in need talk, but this is a bit much.”
“I was out of my mind with fear,” groaned Harry, pushing his face into Draco’s chest. “I went running around to all our friends asking for advice. Actually, on that note we should send another gift basket to Blaise. He’s the one who suggested I grovel for calling you a rat.”
Draco pushed Harry away and narrowed his eyes. “Blaise! Oh I’m going to send him a gift basket, alright. A basket containing Mr. Mumbles, hope he scratches his eye out. That fucker told me you were seeing another guy.”
“What!” Harry gasped “I would never. Draco, how could you even think that? I’m crazy about you!”
Draco preened. “Yeah?”
“Hell yeah!” grinned Harry, gathering him close again. “You know I adore you, as a human and a ferret.”
“Well,” mused Draco, “if you want to cuddle me in my ferret form sometimes, I guess I’m not averse to that.”
“I’d love that. Also, can I carry you in my pocket? You said I could.”
Draco did that thing when he gave a long-suffering sigh while simultaneously managing to look extremely pleased. “Yes. I suppose I could endure that" he said, trying not to smile.
"And can I call you Bubble Bottom? Seeing as the name is not taken by any other ferret" Harry added cheekily.
Draco turned around and nipped at his lower lip. "No you may not. Don't be cheeky. Also, don’t you even think about adopting that other ferret now that the two of you have gotten so cozy together. We’ll find her a sanctuary or a loving home. But I’m the only ferret for you.”
Harry grinned into his hair “You’re the only ferret for me. I promise.”