Chapter Text
Sieun’s apartment filled with the smell of lavender as he opened the bathroom door after taking a shower. Suho pretended to remain unaffected, hiding the blush creeping on his cheeks at the sight of his boyfriend with wet hair, droplets running down his neck.
He had seen Sieun in much more scandalous situations, sure, but anything about him was extremely attractive to Suho.
Then, the dreaded words came. “Let’s study.”
Suho sighed. Now that he didn’t have to use the excuse of tutoring to see Sieun, he had lost all interest in his studies again. It felt like torture that Sieun kept insisting on studying together.
Sieun left briefly, coming back with his arms full of books and Suho rushed to take them off of him.
“English books?” Suho asked as he read the titles of some of them. “I don’t have the energy for English today,” he whined. Sieun stared at him with his blank face, a hint of amusement reflecting in his eyes.
“I thought it became your favorite subject,” Sieun replied sarcastically.
“You know why,” Suho smirked. “Maybe we can just do the kissing part today.”
To Suho’s demise, Sieun shook his head. He walked to the table and waited patiently for Suho to join him, which he eventually did. It started innocently, a peck for each good answer. Then, it became more heated, the kisses lasting longer each time until they were fully making out.
Sieun’s lips were an addiction. Soon, Suho’s mouth found its way down his neck, smelling, kissing, and licking him. Sieun kept asking questions between barely repressed moans. Each time Suho would get one wrong, he would pull on his hair, making both of them even more aroused. Maybe he even got some wrong on purpose, just to feel Sieun's fingers on his scalp, lightly pulling his hair.
It was something out of Suho’s dreams. How good Sieun smelled, how he got to taste him. They didn’t do these things often and it made it all the more exciting. Then, right on his collarbone, Suho couldn’t stop himself, kissing hard, sucking, and biting on the skin. Sieun stopped repressing his moans. It was enough for English to be forgotten altogether.
It was hours later and neither of them heard the front door open as they were already fast asleep in Sieun’s bed. It happened more often now, the sleepovers. With Sieun by his side, Suho was sure he wouldn’t be late to class. His grandmother was relieved to know he was sleeping in a real bed instead of the school, even if it wasn’t his own bed.
Sieun’s father ventured into the dark apartment, trying to not make too much noise, expecting his son to already be asleep. Upon turning the light on, he couldn’t help but notice all the books scattered on the kitchen table.
Unusual , he thought, as Sieun always studied in his room, and even if he didn’t, he always cleaned up after himself.
He shrugged, not thinking too much of it, already making his way to the bathroom. There, he noticed something again. Why was there an extra toothbrush on the side of the sink?
Now that he thought about it, he did see another pair of shoes in the entryway. Yet, somehow, he didn’t expect to see another boy sleeping in his son’s bed. Hugging him so tightly that Sieun was barely visible. He closed the door silently, deciding he should sleep too.
Much like every time, Sieun woke up first. He was used to getting up as soon as he opened his eyes, however, when he was with Suho, he would lay in bed just a bit longer. When his boyfriend would ask about it, Sieun pretended that he was holding him too tightly and that it was impossible for him to get up. It was partially true.
Being a school morning, Sieun only got to enjoy Suho’s warmth for five minutes before having to get up.
Suho’s eyes opened as he felt his boyfriend move away from his arms. “Is it time already?” He mumbled. Sieun nodded, already taking out his and Suho’s uniform from his closet. Because yes, not only did he have his own toothbrush, he also had two spare uniforms in Sieun's closet. He did sleep here quite often now after all.
The last thing they expected was to see Sieun’s father sitting at the kitchen table, calmly drinking his coffee. Even after dating for almost six months, Suho had never met him.
Sieun saw him first, freezing in place, soon followed by Suho, carrying his gray hoodie. “Don’t forget your hoodie or you’ll be cold! You know ho-” He cut himself at the sight of the unfamiliar man in the room with them.
“Slept well?” The adult asked, sarcasm evident in his tone.
“Hello, sir! It’s nice to meet you!” Suho bowed to the man respectfully, although he had never felt respect for him. In six months he had been here so little that Suho had never met him. What kind of parent abandoned their child like this? It enraged Suho and he often wondered why Sieun wasn’t as angry as him. How could he be so nonchalant about this? It was heartbreaking.
“I’d say the same but I don’t even know your name.”
“The name’s Suho, sir. Ahn Su-Ho. I’m Sieun’s… friend.”
“Friend, uh? You two seem awfully close for friends,” he mocked, his eyes darting to Sieun's neck.
Suho noticed how Sieun had started scratching his hand; something he often did when he was anxious.
“Father,” he finally spoke with barely contained anger. “I didn’t know we were close enough to tease each other this way.”
An awkward silence filled the room. Sieun resorted to pinching the red skin but Suho took his hand that automatically wrapped around his finger. He seemed to calm down a bit.
“What did you say?” The adult finally spoke. He had perfectly heard, that much was obvious. He was giving Sieun a second chance.
“Nothing. Welcome home,” Sieun bowed politely before dragging Suho to the bathroom, still holding onto his finger tightly.
Sieun’s face rarely betrayed his emotions, although he started opening up to Suho, but his body language never lied. His eyes too. Suho could spend an eternity just drowning in those pretty eyes of his, analyzing the slightest variation depending on what he was feeling.
They brushed their teeth in silence while Suho observed his boyfriend’s reflection in the mirror. Blank face, teary eyes, trembling hands. He was destabilized and anxious. Suho knew he wouldn’t be getting his usual breakfast this morning but decided it was better to not say anything. He didn’t mind not eating if it could avoid any discomfort to his Sieun.
His . Because now it was official. Everyone must know too. Sieun was his. His, his, his. And no one should dare mess with them.
They left the apartment as quickly as possible.
The school day was as usual. Suho was lucky enough to be sitting a few seats diagonally behind Sieun again this year. Every minute he didn’t spend sleeping (dreaming about Sieun), he would spend it watching his lover from afar.
How could I ever dislike him? Suho often wondered. How could I say that he was rude when he’s the most gentle, warm-hearted person I know? It haunted him sometimes. Sieun had a crush on him at the time and he had acted like a prick. He had always been mesmerized by Sieun and yet he had taken out his fatigue and anger on him.
How unfair.
It was lunchtime when Suho felt the familiar pokes on his cheek. He pretended to still be asleep for good measure, wanting to see how long Sieun would insist. He didn’t expect the finger to be replaced by lips. It was just a peck on his cheek, but Suho was burning.
“Finally, you’re awake,” Sieun sighed. If Suho didn’t know him enough, he’d think Sieun was annoyed, but the amusement in his voice seemed impossible to miss now. “Let’s go eat.”
Sieun wasn’t one for public affection, yet he still held Suho’s finger all the time. It seemed to be a habit now, something he couldn’t help doing. Suho loved it. He would be lying if he said he didn’t like the attention it gave them as well. Proud, yes, he felt proud whenever people would see them together.
Yes, that pretty boy is mine. Look at how he’s holding me, he loves me. He’s mine.
Suho was persuaded that anyone would be jealous of him for dating Sieun. It’s almost as if his past of being bullied and being an outcast never happened because, to Suho, Sieun was someone who deserved all the love. How could anyone look at him for more than a second and not fall?
Anyone would fall for those eyes.
“I don’t know if you can sleep over tonight,” Sieun sighed, taking Suho out of his thoughts. “My father will be here and it’ll be awkward.”
“It’s okay, I’ll sleep at school.” Suho took a huge portion of rice under Sieun’s amazed eyes. “I just have to tell grandm…” Suho stopped himself, as an idea (wonderful, amazing, if you asked him) popped up in his head. Sieun tilted his head, confused at the sudden silence. “Wait. What if you sleep at my place instead?”
“Uh? I only met your grandma twice, I don’t want to impose.”
“I’ll call her after we’re done eating to confirm. Would that make it okay for you?”
Sieun seemed to hesitate a little before eventually nodding. Now Suho couldn’t wait for the day to end. He couldn’t wait to go home.
This obviously made the day pass much, much slower. Even with all the sleeping or observing Sieun in the world. It was still too slow. It was only when he truly fell asleep that the day ended.
The familiar pokes are easily replaced by affection today. Suho feels his lover’s fingers in his hair, caressing it gently. He hums, awake but not wanting him to stop.
“Let’s go,” Sieun then whispered in his ear. Suho jumped from his seat, his ears red and burning.
It was no time before they were home. Grandma engulfed them both in a tight hug, even though she had only met Sieun twice, she was still kind and accepting of him. Suho felt the warmth of Sieun's embrace as they both hugged Grandma. He felt a sense of contentment and peace he had not felt in a long time.
They didn’t have much time before Suho had to go to his part-time job. Sieun insisted on coming too, saying he would keep him company while he did his deliveries. Suho refused, although he knew it was a lost cause. His boyfriend was the most stubborn person he knew.
To say that Suho wasn’t going crazy with how Sieun held onto him while they were on his bike would be a lie. He felt his hands around his waist at first, then they would slowly move under his jacket and Suho could feel their warmth through his t-shirt.
He almost did another lap around his client’s neighborhood so he wouldn’t lose Sieun’s warmth against him. It wasn’t reasonable though, and Suho parked in front of a house, leaving Sieun to wait for him while he did his delivery.
And Sieun whined. Suho was sure of it. He pretended not to hear it though as he walked away. Oh, the things I want to do to you Yeon Sieun.
It was already late when they finally reached home again. Grandma had left them food on the table, which they ate with fervor (Suho especially). She left a note, saying she was out for bingo night with her friends. Being often alone, she had started going to all sorts of clubs, trying to occupy herself, busying her mind so she wouldn’t keep worrying so much about her grandson.
Sieun was the prettiest person Suho had ever seen. His flushed cheeks and glossy eyes filled with tears as he begged under him was a sight Suho wished he could engrave in his mind. He took his time to admire the beauty that was his boyfriend, taking immense pleasure in hearing his whines.
“Suho, please.” Sieun’s voice was hoarse and low. It was already driving him insane. “Hyung,” he pleaded. And that was it. Suho couldn’t restrain himself anymore.
Sieun looked vulnerable and exposed under Suho, his eyes heavy-lidded with desire and his skin flushed with arousal. His lips were slightly parted as he breathed heavily, and his body trembled with each thrust. Suho could feel the heat radiating from Sieun's body, and it only made him want to go harder and faster.
In the end, it all began because Sieun was irresistible. He had borrowed Suho's clothes, drowning in them, his shorts barely peeking out from under the oversized t-shirt. How was Suho supposed to resist him?
It hadn’t been long before the clothes were removed.
Suho felt like he was in a dream, the world around him completely forgotten. He could only focus on Sieun's body and the pleasure that he felt.
They were very grateful that Grandma only came home hours later, well after they had taken a shower and slipped under the covers of Suho’s bed. All traces of what they had been doing only remaining in their memory.
Morning came too fast for Suho’s taste. Still, he got to wake up with Sieun in his arms and that in itself was enough.
The day had started so well. Suho had woken up to Sieun holding his finger, they had eaten a big breakfast that Grandma had cooked for them, the menu for today’s lunch was one of his favourite’s… It was all without counting on Beomseok, who was now in the same class as them, trying to talk to Sieun again.
Suho had noticed his miserable attempts for a while, but now he was approaching Sieun whenever he was sleeping or not by his side. He only knew because the boy was always around Sieun whenever he woke up or walked back into the classroom.
Suho was annoyed.
“Why are you sulking? He just asked if we could eat lunch together,” Sieun asked.
No, Suho was fuming. “Because you accepted.”
“I don’t think he still has feelings for me now, it’s been months.”
“If you didn’t love me back I think I’d still have a crush on you for years to come. You’re not easily forgettable, Sieun!”
Sieun chuckled, not taking him seriously. Suho didn’t want to seem like he wanted to keep Sieun all to himself to the point where he couldn’t make other friends though, so he let the subject drop.
It felt like last year when Suho would just glare at Beomseok the whole time while he and Sieun were eating peacefully. It felt like it because it was happening again. At least this time Sieun is his .
Beomseok seemed like a really reserved person, yet when he was around Sieun, he became very talkative.
“Here, you should eat more,” Beomseok said as he put some of his side dishes to Sieun’s plate. Almost instinctively, Suho put his hand on his boyfriend’s thigh under the table.
“Ah, thank you.”
Throughout the meal, Sieun didn’t touch the extra side dishes, putting them on Suho’s plate instead. Beomseok watched his food go to someone else and Suho wondered if he regretted not eating it.
The school day was finally over and Suho couldn’t wait for the moment he’d get to sleep. Unfortunately, he had a shift at the restaurant before that. Sieun woke him with a kiss on the cheek this time again, leaving Suho feeling more awake than ever.
“After your shift, we’ll study.”
“No, I’m tired,” Suho whined. “Another day?”
Sieun shook his head. They both turned around upon hearing a chair creaking against the floor. They thought everyone had left already, but they realized they were wrong as they saw Beomseok, standing there.
“Let’s go,” Suho sighed. Sieun grabbed his finger, like he always did, and they started walking away. Beomseok watched them, a sad expression on his face. As they reached the door, Suho turned around.
“Aren’t you coming?”
Sieun’s head snapped at him and Suho gave him a supporting smile. After all, maybe Beomseok could become a good friend. He was probably overthinking all of this because of their past.
Still, Suho couldn’t help but stare at them while they were studying on a table in the corner and he was stuck working. He didn’t realize how Sieun looked at him whenever a particular table, full of very flirty girls, talked to him. They kept calling Suho over and Sieun thought he would have to tell them off himself.
As soon as Suho had a break, he ran over to their table, sitting by Sieun, as close as possible. Sieun stared at the table of girls, two of whom were looking in their direction, and he grabbed Suho’s hand, putting it on his thigh. Suho, fully unaware of his boyfriend’s thoughts, squeezed his thigh gently, a fond smile growing on his face.
“I really don’t understand English,” Beomseok said, breaking the silence. Sieun started blushing furiously, against his will, at the mention of the subject. Suho smiled proudly.
“I think it’s my favorite subject,” he replied, winking at his boyfriend.
“Let’s just study math instead,” Sieun cleared his throat.
Soon, Suho got back to work. To Sieun’s relief, the group of girls left not long after as well. After his shift ended, they all ate together. Suho refused to study and for once Sieun did not insist.
When they arrived at Sieun’s apartment a few hours later, they were pleased to see that his father was either gone or already asleep.
Sieun was wearing blue and pink striped socks. Suho smiled to himself at the sight before getting ready to bed along with his boyfriend.
The days that followed were only made different by Beomseok’s presence by their side. He was nicer than Suho had first thought, but he tended to be very touchy with Sieun, which displeased him a lot. Still, he didn’t say anything, he didn’t think it was his place to get mad at someone for lightly touching his boyfriend.
Well, until Sieun spoke up one day.
They were studying again, at Sieun’s place this time. His father had left again earlier that day. Suho observed them as he played video games on his phone from the other side of the table.
Beomseok was sitting so close to Sieun that they were touching, he turned his head at the same time he would, sometimes patting his head. Suho’s anger was palpable, even though he didn’t utter a word.
“Listen, Beomseok,” Sieun began speaking after his friend brushed his hand against his. “I’m not very comfortable with you touching me. Sorry for not telling you earlier but I really dislike it.”
“You let Suho touch you all the time,” Beomseok said instead of apologizing. Suho sighed, annoyed, ready to say something.
“He’s my boyfriend. Of course, I let him touch me,” Sieun spoke first.
“You let him touch you, uh? Even before you two were together you were awfully touchy, to be honest, I couldn’t guess you wouldn’t like it.”
“Watch your tone,” Suho warned.
“I know you couldn’t guess, that’s why I’m telling you to stop now.”
Suho would be lying if he didn’t say that Sieun’s cold, monotonous voice didn’t turn him on. He caught himself, embarrassed, and quickly looked away. He took a deep breath, trying to think of something to say.
“Look, Beomseok, he’s not asking you to explain yourself. It’s easy to apologize and never do it again.”
Beomseok laughed . It set something very unpleasant in Suho, something ugly that was better contained.
“We’re not talking to you, Suho. You’re always on the side when we’re together, maybe know your place, no?” Beomseok smirked. How ugly.
“Don’t talk to him like that. I really wanted to be your friend because you kept trying to be close to me, but this is getting out of hand,” Sieun sighed almost regretfully. “I didn’t want to think about it but… Do you still have feelings for me?”
“Isn’t it obvious? I thought you wanted to spend time with me because you were bored of your boyfriend.”
An awkward silence filled the room. Beomseok was no longer laughing. The tension was palpable as Sieun stood up. His eyes, cold, angry, didn’t leave Beomseok. He didn’t need to be told to leave, doing it on his own volition.
Beomseok slammed the door behind him and Sieun was left standing alone in the room. He slowly picked up his things, feeling a heavy sense of regret and disappointment. He realized he had made a mistake, and that people would always have an ulterior motive to approach him.
Suho watched as his boyfriend closed the books, bringing them back to his room. He picked up the last few notebooks that were left on the table before joining him in his room. Sieun was sitting on his bed, looking in the distance. Suho kneeled in front of him, taking his hands in his. Sieun snapped back to reality, staring into Suho’s eyes.
“You were right all along,” Sieun said, his voice soft again.
“He just isn’t a good person. It’s not your fault, Sieun. You’re always so kind, I understand your disappointment.”
Suho looked down, not bearing the softness of Sieun’s gaze any longer. Fluffy socks, white and pink with a strawberry on the ankle. So damn cute. Against his will, Suho smiled, his hand reaching to feel the softness of the fabric. Sieun’s almost kicked him, startled by the sudden touch.
“What are you doing?”
“You’re always wearing such cute socks, Sieun-ah. It’s so endearing,” Suho smiled with stars in his eyes, finally lifting his head again.
“Oh.”
“You’re blushing. Cute.”
“I’m not blushing.”
“You are!” Suho’s hands positioned themselves on his boyfriend’s warm cheeks, proving a point.
“It’s just that my mom would buy me this kind of socks when she still loved me,” Sieun began, his voice lower, softer, as he remembered his childhood.
When she still loved me. The bitter words lingered in Suho’s mind, aching in his heart.
“She did?” He encouraged, wanting to know more.
“Yes. I grew to like it so I keep buying them every time I see a cute pair. I think I like cute things in general.”
He confessed the same way you’d confess a crime. It was cute. Suho was definitely going to buy him lots of cute trinkets and socks from now on.
They went on to take a shower together. Under the warm water, Suho and Sieun embraced each other, their hands intertwined, and the water washing away the fatigue and anxiety of their day.
They laughed and talked, Suho's head resting on Sieun's shoulder and Sieun's arms around his neck. In that moment, they felt safe, content, and secure in each other's embrace.
After a long and relaxing shower, they got out and dried off. Suho made sure to dry Sieun’s back and his hair carefully, not wanting him to catch a cold. After such a moment, they left the bathroom smelling like lavender, feeling refreshed and ready to tackle the world together.
A week passed, calmly, as they settled back into their usual routine. Sieun was staring at the night sky as he left the academy. Suho watched him from his motorcycle, love seeping from his eyes.
When he looked away, just for a second, he noticed him. Beomseok was also watching from a distance, slowly walking to Sieun.
Suho pushed himself up, running towards his boyfriend and grabbing his hand lovingly. Sieun turned his head, startled, only to see the subject of all his adoration. He allowed himself to smile gently.
Suho thought life wasn’t all so bad. Not if he had Sieun by his side. He leaned in and kissed Sieun on the cheek, his heart swelling with happiness. Sieun's face lit up, and he let out a small giggle. Suho felt himself fall into the moment, content.
It was all too precious to see how much Sieun let his mask drop around him now. Not just at home too, he would smile and laugh in public, like this. It was still rare, but Suho appreciated it so much he felt like his heart was going to burst out of his chest with adoration sometimes.
Beomseok didn’t bother them in the end but Suho knew he needed to have a serious conversation with him.
It happened no later than the next day, at school. Sieun was busy revising for a test during the break and Suho took that opportunity to drag Beomseok outside. People swarmed around them like bugs. Those still inside rushed against windows. They made it out to be something much bigger than it was. They screamed at Suho to punch him, to fight. He even heard some say Beomseok stood no chance against him in a fight.
It was all true, he didn’t. Suho had no plan on using violence though, unless it was his last resort. Suho hadn’t uttered a word yet but the attention, the cruel words against him, made Beomseok red in the face with embarrassment or anger, he wasn’t sure.
“I saw you yesterday,” Suho began in a calm voice, as if he was just talking to his friend.”Were you going to talk to Sieun?”
Beomseok nodded, shyly. There was no point in lying now.
“I wasn’t going to do anything bad. Just to ask if we could still be friends.”
“Well, you can’t,” Suho’s tone was firm now. “He already gave you a second chance, you fucked it up.” Everyone was now silent, listening to their conversation. Suho sighed. “Look, I understand that you have feelings for Sieun. How could you not, honestly? But you didn’t have to be an asshole about it.”
“I just wonder sometimes how much you must’ve begged him to date you. I wonder if it could’ve been me.”
Suho’s rage was palpable. He walked closer to Beomseok, wrapping his arm around his shoulder. “You never learn your lesson, uh? I swear I’m gonna-”
“He never begged since I liked him first,” a voice interrupted them. Everyone turned around to look at Sieun, who was standing there, watching the scene unfolding before him. “Let’s go,” he said as soon as he reached Suho, grabbing his finger and walking away with him. Beomseok was left there, humiliated as a big part of the school stared at him.
“How embarrassing,” Sieun said after a few minutes of walking in silence.
“Who? Me?” Suho asked sadly.
“No. Everyone else. Beomseok. The others for watching. It feels stupid.”
“It does,” Suho nodded, relieved that he hadn’t embarrassed his boyfriend.
And soon, everything came back to normal. It felt like a blessing that Beomseok had finally stopped bothering them.
“Let’s study,” Sieun suggested once again, after a long day.
No, not suggested. It was never a question with him. Suho had no choice but to comply. He hoped it would be English at least.
BONUS:
Christmas was just around the corner, the weather was cold and it started snowing lightly. Suho and Sieun decided to spend the day at the Christmas fair, exploring the bustling stalls and enjoying the festive atmosphere. Sieun was cutely wrapped up in layers of clothes, making him irresistible to Suho’s eyes. He was wearing the pink scarf Suho had bought him. His blank face and cold attitude were a contrast with how cute he looked.
Sieun’s shiny eyes didn’t escape Suho’s attention, though, as they visited the food stalls, trying out the different holiday treats. All so delicious (and expensive).
They visited the game booths as well, competing against each other to win prizes. They even took a ride on the Ferris wheel, taking in the beautiful view of the city illuminated by Christmas lights.
At the end of the evening, Sieun went home with his arms full of plushies and other random prizes Suho had won for him. Well, some had been won by Sieun after Suho failed countless times, but to preserve his pride they pretended Suho won everything himself.
Now, Sieun even adorned a cute keychain on his backpack at school.