Chapter Text
They hadn't spoken a word before they reached the linden tree - the place where it all began a year ago. Henry remembered how desperate he had felt when he had left the tent. He had been better for a moment when Alex had come after him - something Henry had not expected. Then things had got worse. He had kissed Alex with all the desire that had been pent-up inside him for years and it had been the happiest moment of his entire life. Then he had realised what he had done. He didn't remember much of the rest of the night, only that he had been so miserable. After that, he had suffered for weeks, even considering skipping the Prime Minister's dinner he had been invited to. But he'd known the Crown wouldn't allow it, and he'd also known he couldn't avoid Alex forever. He remembered how nervous he had been when Amy had asked him to come to the Red Room. He had expected an angry Alex, a disgusted Alex, a confused Alex - but certainly not an Alex who would kiss him like a starving man.
"Henry." Alex' voice brought Henry back from his trip down memory lane.
"Yes, my love?"
Alex seemed a little nervous, but he was smiling, so Henry knew nothing bad was going to happen.
Alex took both of his hands.
"This is where it all started," he said.
"All the good stuff anyway," Henry grinned. "I was quite surprised when you told Zahra that we had been together since New Year's. At the time I had no idea you felt that way."
"Henry, I was yours from the moment your lips touched mine for the first time. Probably even before that, but it was only when you kissed me that I allowed myself to feel it. And that's why I wanted to come here with you, a year later. Because here, in the place where our first kiss happened, I wanted to thank you. I wanted to thank you for giving me the most important kiss of my life. I wanted to thank you for loving me even then, and I wish I had realised it sooner. I wanted to thank you for deciding to give us a chance and the opportunity to tell the world how we feel about each other. Remember when I said in my speech that you made my life immeasurably better? You continue to do that, and you make me happier than I ever thought I could be," Alex confessed.
Henry had to swallow the lump that was forming in his throat.
"When I kissed you here a year ago, I never thought this would happen, us, together, in a loving, committed relationship. I just thought I had destroyed our blossoming friendship. I thought I would be lonelier than before. And then came the Prime Minister's dinner, and this time you kissed me. I was afraid I was going to burst that night. I'm so glad you allowed yourself to discover your feelings for me. It doesn't matter when it happened, what matters is that it happened. You needed time to come to terms with your sexuality and your feelings," he replied.
They both smiled at each other.
"My only regret is that I wasn't honest with you about my feelings from the start," Henry admitted. "That I told you we had to keep it casual and that I could only belong to someone temporarily when I was already yours, heart, mind, body and soul."
"Hey, I understand that. You were just protecting your heart. You didn't know what to expect from me, if this was just an experiment for me or something more serious. I even understand why you left me in Texas! And I wanted to apologise for being so self-centred when I tried to tell you that I loved you. But I had only realised the night before, when we went out for karaoke and tequila shots, that you were in my heart, and had been for a long time. Just a few days before, my mom had asked me if I felt forever about you, and I didn't know what to say. That night everything became crystal clear to me and I knew the answer could only be 'yes'. I wanted to tell you as soon as possible, but I just got carried away. I had these fantasies about us being together for the long haul and letting the world know. And I thought that was what you wanted too. I didn't realise then why you didn't allow yourself to even think about it. I guess I only understood when we had to face your grandfather and your brother and I saw with my own eyes the pressure they put on you. Hell, your grandfather even made me shut up! And you had suffered from this for years, taking it in silence. You had told me, but it seems I had to see it with my own eyes. I'm sorry for being so blind, sweetheart."
"Don't be," Henry answered. "I must admit I was a little angry with you for not paying attention to my needs when I left Texas. But it didn't last long. I missed you too much. If you hadn't come to Kensington, I'm afraid I would have thrown myself at your feet at the next official function we both attended, begging you to take me back. You made me realise that I didn't have to take the shit they threw at me, that I had a right to feel what I feel and who I feel it for. So I have to thank you too. Thank you for giving me the courage to fight and a reason to fight. Who would have thought that an American rebel would be the one to help me stand up for myself. I don't know who would be more shocked - your forefathers or mine.”
They laughed at the last statement and then kissed again. Both were relieved to have gotten some important truths off their chests on such an important night.
"Let's go inside," Alex suggested as he felt Henry shiver slightly in his arms. "You may be blue-blooded, but that doesn't mean your lips have to match the colour."
Henry agreed.
Ignoring the tent, they went straight back to Alex's room where he drew them a hot bath to warm them both up. When they were in the bath, with a few candles lit in the room and a last glass of champagne, they could still hear the music from outside. Alex had to smile a little when he remembered that he had not left the last New Year's parties before sunrise the next day. But he didn't miss it. It was much better this way: enjoying the hot water and the equally hot man in his arms. He wouldn't have traded it for anything.
Henry's thoughts seemed to wander in another direction, for he suddenly asked: "Do you ever miss it?"
Alex was taken completely by surprise. "Miss what?"
Henry sighed. "Being with a girl. You know, touching boobs instead of a man's chest and ... all that."
Alex understood where this was coming from and became angry with Rita again. Instead of answering right away, he took his time, stroking Henry's chest and planting a few kisses on Henry's ear, neck and jaw.
"The answer is no," he finally said. "Yes, I know I like to flirt and I'm grateful that you accept that part of me. But it will never go beyond flirting. Of course I register whether a person is attractive or not, and I may even admire them for it. But it doesn't go deeper than that. For example: I might see a girl with pretty lips and automatically think, 'Yes, nice lips'. But at the same time, another part of my brain says, 'Yes, but they won't taste like Henry's lips. Or there is a guy with great legs and all I can think is: His legs may be amazing, but they will never feel like Henry's when they are wrapped around my hips.’ You're beautiful, my darling, but it's not just skin deep for me. I would never risk what we have for some meaningless fling or meaningless sex with another person. I'm with you and I don't want to be with anyone else. I know there are people out there who say that people aren't made to be monogamous. I don't agree. I love you and that makes me want only you. Your wonderful body as much as your beautiful brain, your loving and caring personality and all that makes you you. I would miss that more than anything else.”
Henry turned to face Alex. There were a few tears in his eyes as he replied: "That makes me a very lucky man."
"Very." Alex agreed with a grin. "Who would have thought all those years ago at the Climate Conference in Melbourne?"
"I certainly wouldn't have." Henry admitted. "I saw you and I was lost. Hello Alex, goodbye heart. But I was also convinced that I was helplessly in love with a straight man."
"I feel a bit insulted that you only wanted me for my looks," Alex pouted.
"No, they were just part of the package," Henry assured him. "I was attracted to your ability to light up a room just by walking into it. You exuded so much confidence, charm and charisma and had everyone wrapped around your finger in no time. If I hadn't told Shaan to get me out of there, I probably would have done something very, very stupid. It was never just about your looks, Alex. And I'm very glad that I've gotten to know you better since 'cakegate' through our messages, emails and meetings. I have had the opportunity to get to know Alex Claremont-Diaz in a way that very few people have. Remember Thanksgiving when you called me about the turkey in your room? During that conversation you asked me if you had surprised me in any way, and I replied that you were as ghastly as I had imagined. But that wasn't the truth. I never found you ghastly and I never hated you, as you suspected the first night we were together. Quite the opposite. I love you and you still surprise me every day. But that makes me love you even more.”
Alex didn't immediately answer with words. Instead he took Henry in his arms and gave him a long hug, followed by a sweet and tender kiss.
"For the record, I never hated you. It was only with time that I discovered why I so desperately wanted your attention and for you to respond to me like a normal human being. I guess I was already attracted to you. I just didn't know it. If only I had realised..."
"No darling," Henry strokes Alex's cheek. "I told you in the garden that it wasn't our time yet. You had to accept that you weren't as straight as you thought you were, and I had to put my grief behind me. Let's just be grateful that we've both finally come to terms with our feelings for each other."
"Oh, I am very grateful. How about we get out of the bath and I show you how grateful I am when we make love," Alex suggested.
Henry grinned and Alex sighed. "Yes, I know, I laughed about it in Paris. But it was only out of nervousness! But you were right back then, it was really making love. And it has been ever since. At least for me."
"For me too. And there's nothing I'd like to do more right now."
"All right, come on, bed is calling." Alex started to get out of the tub, but Henry stopped him.
"One more thing."
"Yes, darling?" Alex looked at Henry questioningly.
"Happy New Year, Alex. I hope there are many more to come."
"Happy New Year, Henry. There will be many more, I'm sure. And happy anniversary, by the way. Also with many more to come.”
“Happy anniversary, love.”
They kissed and then climbed out of the tub in order to celebrate the new year and the next year of their relationship in their own special way.