Chapter Text
“All rise! The royal, regal, and handsome King and Queen Of Hearts, rulers of all Wonderland, and kind, benevolent leaders, now will begin the court of review!”
There was a grand trumpeting and Ujiko quickly scampered off his podium with a bow as the royal couple walked past him to their thrones.
The royal court all cheered for the king and queen as they took their places at the head of the court. Their thrones were bathed with the gold and red light cast from the stained glass of the castle. The queen hummed happily and smoothed out the wrinkles of her skirt while her husband began the session. The crowd went silent as he barked at his guards.
“Bring in my advisor! I shall review her for her poor work and decide if she can keep her head or not!” The order was followed by the banging of the kings scepter against the floor
The royal guards quickly obeyed their king and saluted to him. Two cards quickly scurried out to grab the girl.
Hisashi sighed and sank into his throne, already tired of this. He looked at his wife as she reached over to take his hand. “Darling, why can I not just take her head?” He whined, pouting like a child. “You know how happy it makes me.”
Inko sighed at her husband and pet his hand gently to comfort him. “I know, darling.” She soothed. “However, we can’t keep replacing our court members. We shall hear the advisor out. Izuku has only been here for a month. Then we can decide to sentence her. Alright?”
Hisashi groaned and rolled his eyes as his wife reprimanded him. He was king! He should be able to whatever he wanted!
They had found Izuku in the forest during their picnic. She wandered up to them and wouldn’t leave them alone. Hisashi asked her if she wanted a position as royal advisor -he had just executed his last one- and Izuku agreed to the position.
The role of advisor is very serious! So far Izuku had done nothing but fail at her job! The advice she gave the king made absolutely no sense! When Hisashi was walking through the halls he expected her to make due pace and keep up, but he always had to go back and wait for her to keep up. She cried all through the night. She took a nap in the middle of his speech!! It wasn’t just unprofessional! It was insulting! He has had people beheaded for less!
The Queen didn’t help either, much to his distain. Inko believed little Izuku had potential to advise the king and continued to praise her even when she did a terrible job! She comforted the girl when she cried about dropping the scrolls and helped her read the court documents. Izuku was coddled by the queen! There was no improvement in her performance!
Because of this, the King Of Hearts had been in a bad mood lately. The people of the castle grew nervous around him when they took notice. The only thing that ever fixed the kings mood was seeing heads roll.
The doors opened once again and the card soldiers marched in. They held the little advisor between them and carried her up to the stand wordlessly. Thankfully, the advisor did not fight. Izuku was placed down on the wooden platform. She didn’t look afraid despite being called before the mad king who would decide her fate.
All For One cleared his throat and selected a long scroll from the basket beside him. He opened it and allowed it to unfurl, the long page falling from his lap and rolling down the stairs. Izuku peered over the edge of the platform when it stopped just before her. It was mostly blank, save for the few lines the king had written at the top. The king cleared his throat as he held up the scroll. The room was quiet as he began to read the child’s crimes.
“Advisor Izuku! I have allowed you into my palace with the expectation that you would aid me in my rule. You are my advisor! Your job is to advise me on things I need to be advised on! I should not have to advise you on what you need to advise me on because you are my advisor and should already know what needs to be advised! Instead of acting as my advisor and advising me: I’ve had to advise you! What do you have to say for yourself?”
Izuku did not respond. She just stared up at the king before smiling and waving at him. The queen giggled gave a tiny wave back. The king scoffed and rolled his eyes at her. “Yes. Hello. You are on trial!” He barked suddenly. “This is not a smiling matter!” The king's face turned red with rage as he looked down at the little traitor.
The king instantly calmed down when he heard his wife beside him hum. The king groaned at her reminder to calm himself. They had been trying to be more calm and thoughtful rulers. The new clarity allowed him to think
“Perhaps my cabinet has not trained you well enough!” All For One snapped, the thought suddenly popping into his mind. The royal cabinet all jumped in fear when they were suddenly looped into the conversation. The king snapped towards them and pointed his scepter at them.
“What is your explanation as to why she is so awful at her job? I pay her! Yet she does nothing but sit there and babble on and on about nonsensical things!”
For a moment there was silence. The cabinet members all glanced at each other, but none stepped forward to answer their king. This only proved to anger him further. He did not at all like being ignored! Not in his very own court!
All For One huffed angrily and barked at them. “Well?! What is it!? One of you! Speak!” The court jumped when he banged his fist against the arm of his throne. The sound rang through the courtroom and many flinched.
The cabinet quickly shoved one of their members forward to answer to the king. A tall frog wearing a purple suit. He stood in the middle of the court and turned a deathly pale when he saw the king looking right at him. A nervous croak left him. The frog quickly straightened and cleared his throat. He reached up to tug at his collar, trying to hide the nervous sweat he had as he began “W- well, your majesty-“ The words died in his throat, unable to think of a single word to say
He looked back at his fellow court members in a panic, begging for any one of them to help him. The others shook their heads and urged him forward. They weren’t going to speak up against the king.
The frog ran his hands together nervously as he looked up at his king. The amphibian glanced at the executioner in the corner and gulped. His stammering made the King’s eyes narrow harshly. “W-w- well, your majesty, the court has re-re- reviewed your advisor. Perhaps the reason why she is unable to perform her royal duties is because she’s- well- a baby.”
He stepped back and gestured to the royal advisor, who had given up on standing and plopped herself down on the carpeted podium.
The baby looked around at the crowd around her before focusing on the carpet and started picking at the pretty stitching. Izuku wore a little dress of red and black silk and tool. There were pawns sewn into her skirt and hearts on the sleeves of the black material. The queen insisted her husband's advisor be well dressed for her position.
All For One narrowed his eyes. “Yes? And your point is?”
He watched the frog shift uncomfortably, unsure of how to respond and explain to the king how having a baby as royal advisor was a bad idea
Of course the king was aware that his advisor was a baby! But that was no excuse! She could walk and have some semblance of a conversation! Of course, no one could understand the majority of what was said, but Hisashi took her words to heart! He raised taxes because she said he should! Being a baby was no excuse for slacking on the job!
All For One tilted his head skeptically at the frog. It was obvious by his expression that he doubted this reasoning. He turned back to his advisor and called out to her. “Advisor! What do you have to say about this accusation?! Does being a baby inhibit your abilities to perform correctly in the position I have granted you?”
The advisor looked up at her king with wide eyes when she was called upon. Her hands stopped plucking at the stitching in the carpet. The court waited with bated breath for the response. It would decide between life and death for the advisor
Izuku was very unprofessional, and perhaps dreadfully unaware of her audience, when she blew a raspberry at her king in response. “Pfftt!” The gesture was followed by giggling as the baby saw the looks of horror on the faces of all the court members.
A collective gasp of of horror went through the audience at the display. A woman clutched her pearls and fainted into the arms of an unprepared card, who folded in half under her. Shouts of anger rose up around them. No one would ever dare say such a thing to the king! It was outrageous! Treasonous!!
All eyes turned to the king to see his reaction and braced for him to explode at the advisor. Poor little Izuku. She didn't understand the severity of what she had just done. It was sure to seal her fate.
The king’s red eyes were dark with rage as he huffed and turned his nose up at the child in disbelief. “Is that what you have to say for yourself? Perhaps death isn't even enough! Keep your head! Guards! I want her taken to the dungeons!”
The card guards quickly marched up to the stand to collect the advisor, spooking her.
Izuku saw the guards walking towards her and let out a small cry. She quickly stood and attempted to evade her capture and imprisonment, toddling away from the stand and making her way up the stairs to the thrones. The whole room broke out in gasps and cries when the child ran up to the queen and grabbed her leg.
Izuku whined and hugged the queen's leg tightly. All For One laughed at her pitiful attempt to beg for sympathy. He stood and peered down at the child with a proud smile. “It is too late! We can not be swayed on our decision! There is no point in begging your queen for forgiveness when she-“
His words faltered when he saw Inko reach down to pick up the baby girl. The queen smiled sweetly as she brought the child into her lap. Izuku looked up at her with a trembling lip and bubbling eyes. Inko cooed and wiped away her tears with a gentle hand. “Awe. Did that scare you, little one?”
Hisashi recognized that fond smile on his wife’s face and stepped back in horror. He pointed a finger at her and used his best ‘giving orders’ voice. “Inko, no. She is a prisoner! A traitor! Hand her to the guards!”
Inko looked back at her husband and held the baby closer to her chest. Izuku seemed content to snuggle into the queen's embrace. Hisashi could have sworn she gave him a gloating smile!
“If she’s a horrible advisor, perhaps she'll make a better princess.” Inko held the baby up to get a good look at her. “Besides, it can barely walk. She'll be no good for labor. Nor will the jabberwocky like to eat her! She’s tiny!” The baby squealed when her cheeks were squished by the observant queen. “And far too chubby. It’s like giving him all the fatty cuts.”
All For One wanted to argue with his wife, after all she was humiliating him in front of the court and allowing a hardened criminal to evade capture simply because she had a cute face. However, he knew Inko was the one person he couldn’t replace. So, he let out an heavy sigh and reluctantly sat down with a huff.
“Fine. I pardon the baby!” He declared halfheartedly, making the court sigh in relief.
The king sprang back up in his throne to point at the audience. His face was once again red with breathless rage as he shouted at them. “But no one told me it was bad to have a baby as my advisor! Whoever is responsible will be punished! Off with their head! Whoever they are!”
The frog courtier hung his head in misery as the card guards marched up to him.
All For One let out a happy sigh and leaned back in his throne, proud of how he handled that. Ah. It did feel good to say that.
The king and queen were then surprised when they heard their new daughter babbling. “Off wip the ed!” Izuku cried adorably, waving around a little arm to mimic her king. She smiled proudly at the man and Hisashi felt his heart melt instantly and he let out a noise of excitement. Oh! Oh she was absolutely perfect!
“Yes! Yes! Off with their head! What a wonderful little girl you are!” He cheered, reaching over to grab the baby from her mother. He set Izuku in his lap and beamed down at her. Now that he was looking, she looked very much like his darling Inko. Yes! Yes this was perfect!
Izuku, the new Princess Of Hearts.