Chapter Text
“Hello? Anyone home?”
A familiar green Fudgehog cautiously walked around the outskirts of Piñata Central. His head glanced back and forth, scanning the area from his nightmares. It was rather baren for a Tuesday, which was strange considering the fact that the capitol is always teeming with piñatas.
“Oh, Fergs…” He told himself as he stepped closer to the Candiosity Checker. “What are you getting yourself into?”
He sighed and looked around, getting closer and closer to the platform. His confetti was quaking as the machine, even deactivated, gave him the chills. He stopped and just stared at the checker.
The Fudgehog inhaled sharply and turned around, “Nope! Not doing this! This is a dumb idea anyway! I- AHHHHHH!!”
He jumped and flinched at the sight of the piñata in front of him. There stood a Lickatoad with his iconic Piñata Wrangler hat. He had a look of unamusement on his face as he witnessed the piñata cower in fear.
The Lickatoad rolled his eyes, “Why are you here, Fergy? Come to gloat?” He hopped over to the control panel and scanned his card.
Fergy eased up, “Not exactly… I’m here to ask you a few questions. It’s about Paulie.”
He stopped what he was doing and stared at the piñata, “Paulie?” He paused and frowned, “Don’t tell me it’s about those rumors.”
“It’s about those rumors.”
“Of course it is…” He mumbled under his breath. He let out an audible groan and sideyed Fergy, “They’re all made up. So, stop asking and go be nosy somewhere else.”
“Langston, I know they’re not made up. I know everything!” He took a step closer to the Lickatoad.
“Fergy, I am very busy at the moment. Go ask your boyfriend about them.” He mumbled under his breath.
“You don’t look very busy.” He glanced at Piñata Central. Parts were moving but it was abnormally quiet. He looked back at the Lickatoad.
Langston sighed, “Fine. Maybe it is a slow day. But I wouldn’t want to spend it talking to you.” He shot a glare at the Fudgehog.
“Hey! I would rather spend my Tuesday anywhere but here! So we’re stuck in the same boat.” He glared back at him.
“Then leave!” He pointed to the horizon for emphasis.
“No! I want to know if Paulie was telling the truth! I want to know if you two really dated!”
The Lickatoad froze, “Wait… Paulie told you?”
“Yes! He told me everything!”
The Piñata Wrangler paused. He then scowled at Fergy, “Then why are you here? Paulie told you all you needed to know.” He turned around to continue working.
“Because I want your side, Langston.” Fergy replied, stepping closer.
He stopped what he was doing and turned back to the Fudgehog, “You want… my side?” He asked, inching closer, “You? Want my opinion?” He held in a chuckle.
Fergy rolled his eyes, “Haha. Very funny. Come on, Langston, I’m being serious! I waited a whole week for this!” He huffed and tried to be as genuine as possible. “Even though I trust Paulie way more than you; I still want to hear your story.”
Langston crossed his arm and raised an eyebrow, “Okay, what did you do to Fergy?”
“Take this seriously, Langston!” His genuineness was getting shattered by Langston’s remarks. “Paulie told me that you and he dated and were Piñata Wranglers together! Also, that you two broke up because of me.” He took one more step closer, now at the base of the control panel.
The Lickatoad’s eyes widened. He hesitated and looked away. He then turned back to the piñata in front of him. “He told you everything, huh?”
“That’s what I’ve been saying!” Fergy took a deep breath, “I need to know if he was telling the truth… or lying to me to get me off his back.”
“He’s telling the truth alright.” Langston nodded, “Maybe a little biased knowing him, but the truth.”
“Biased? What do you mean biased?” He walked a bit forward. He was now on top of the ramp, but not exactly on the platform.
“He probably twisted something in his favor.” The frog shrugged. “Probably made me the bad guy.” He said under his breath, but Fergy caught on.
“Of course he made you the bad guy. You’re always the bad guy!” Fergy shot a glare.
Langston rolled his eyes, “Maybe to you, but not to the Big Boss. Or any of the other piñata for that matter. Face it, Fudgehog, you’re in the minority.”
“Maybe I am, but the minority is right… sometimes.”
“Oh, please. If you were right, you and your boyfriend wouldn’t be the only partyless piñatas. Well, at least you would be” Langston turned away, smirking to himself.
“What? What do you mean ‘at least me’?” The Fudgehog carefully stepped on the platform, attempting to get closer to his enemy.
“Let me guess, he didn’t tell you.” He responded, not looking up from his panel.
“Tell me what? For Piñotaur’s sake, Langston, just tell me straight!”
Langston pressed a button and turned directly to Fergy. “Well, Fergy, I wouldn’t call the Pretztail… ‘Party-free’ like yourself.” His smirk turned devious as he leaned forward.
“Party-free? Ugh! Stop being vague. What did he not tell me?” Fergy was getting peeved at Langston now. He managed to get on the control panel, right in the Lickatoad’s face.
“How dense are you? I’m saying Paulie’s been to a party!” Langston flailed his arms at him.
The Fudgehog scoffed, “Oh, please. I know that. I went with him. And besides, that party was a phony anyway–”
“Not the fake party. A real party. With real kids, real cake, and real bashing.”
Fergy’s heart stopped as he moved back. It felt like his whole world view shattered. He admired Paulie for his quick-thinking, wit, and his ability to escape the grasp of Langston. Somepiñata who swore never to have experienced a party. He even told Fergy himself.
Langton noticed his reaction and groaned. He once again turned away to continue his job. Fergy stood there like a Doenut in the headlights before shaking his head.
“You’re… you’re lying.” Is all he could say. “Paulie would never lie to me.”
The Lickatoad let out an audible groan. “I knew it. I knew you wouldn’t actually come here to hear my side.”
Fergy shut his eyes and raised his hands. “Oh, no no no, Langston, this isn’t your side because you’re blatantly lying! I told you that you’re always the villain, you–”
The wrangler cut him off, “Shut up for once in your life? Geez, how does Paulie put up with you?”
“How did he put up with you?” Fergy retorted, eyeing the Lickatoad up and down. “You’re the one who said he wasn’t doing anything as a wrangler.”
Langston held back a laugh. “He said that too? Wow. How gullible are you really?”
“Paulie told me that he’s never been to a party, he was a wrangler with you, he dated you, and that you two broke up because of me.” Fergy counted on his fingers.
He paused and slightly tilted his head. “Okay, three of those are true,”
“Was it the dating one? Please tell me he was just joking.” Fergy pleaded, hoping that he was still Paulie’s first boyfriend.
“No, you dumpsterbrain, it’s the party one!” Langston pressed a button and one of the Piñata Central hands smacked Fergy, causing him to scream. “Does anything I say to you stick?” He scoffed and folded his arms.
Fergy growled and rubbed the part where he was hit. “Ow! What was that for?” Langston responded with an eyebrow raise. The Fudgehog crossed his arms back and lifted his chin up. “But I can’t say it does. You have a very annoying voice.”
“Please. I wouldn’t want to hear your voice for even 11 minutes straight.” He rolled his eyes.
Fergy gasped, “What? I have a very lovely voice, thank you.”
“Do you want to hear my side or not?” Langston had work today, and he couldn’t let Fergy take up all of it with his dumb questions.
Fergy poked his chest, scowling. “I would if you weren’t a big, fat liar! You… you liartoad!” He stuttered an insult.
“Hah! I’m the liar? You can stand there and claim that while Paulie outright lied to your face?” He shoved the paw out, scowling back.
“He would never! Paulie is always truthful with me–” Fergy defended before being stopped by a monotone response.
“What about the time he claimed he was a Squazzil?” Langston’s brows furrowed as he gazed back at the control panel.
Fergy could sort of agree on that statement. “Okay, I guess, but that was the Piñata Central Computer’s fault. And maybe Ella’s, but mostly the computer.”
“So, you know how vulnerable the computer is?” Langston’s gaze briefly turned to the Cannoñata, and back to Fergs.
“It is?” He seemed genuinely confused.
“Of course it is! How do you think he erased his party records? How do you think he even knows where they are located and what to do?” Langston snapped, hopping slightly.
Fergy paused, trying to defend his boyfriend. “But… how do you know that?”
“Security cameras are a wonder.” He replied nonchalantly.
“But what about Big Boss? Huh? He told me himself that Paulie went to no parties–”
“Because he erased his files! Like, the second he got back he erased it. Big Boss was reading his modern files.” He felt like he was talking to a wall. How much will Fergy risk to defend his partner?
“Oh, yeah? Well… uh… I…” He tapped his foot and averted the frog’s gaze.
Langston shook his head and proceeded to do his job. Since there were no piñata’s to scan, or at least no piñatas he could scan without breaking the rules, he was put on maintenance duty. Fergy kept stumbling on his words, looking for a comeback.
The wrangler was getting sick of his constant attempts and turned to him. “Fergy, listen, if you have nothing important to say, you can just leave. The longer you stay, the urge to send you to a party gets stronger.” Langston let out a small chuckle and turned away.
This caught Fergy off guard. “Hey! You can’t do that! Big Boss’ orders, remember?”
“Yes, you don’t have to tell me twice.” He mumbled under his breath without turning back.
“And I do have something important to say. Let’s say, hypothetically, Paulie did… go… to a party.” Fergy spat out, the words leaving a nasty taste on his tongue.
The Fudgehog’s statement got a side-eye from the Lickatoad. He was listening.
Fergy took a deep breath, “Why would he… erase himself from the system? Was the party that bad or…” He fiddled with his paws, his eyes aiming at the ground. “I assume you dated– er– knew him when it happened… right?”
“Are you still in denial that he and I kissed?”
“That’s besides the point!” Fergy snapped back. He sighed. “Look, Langston, please. I want to know, okay?”
Langston exhaled and readjusted his hat. “Fine. Are you really that desperate?”
He nodded in response. “Very.”
“Okay, then.” He took one last glance around the Candiosity Checker. The only piñatas around were him and Fergy. There were no excuses now. “From what I’ve gathered, Paulie seemed to leave out why he became a wrangler, correct?”
Fergy shook his head. “No. He said it was the same as me and you. To avoid parties.”
Langston let out a small huff. “Oh, I guess he told you that too.”
“Don’t think too much about it. I hate to figure out what exactly we have in common.” Fergy waved it off. “Right now, it’s about Paulie and his alleged partying.”
“It’s not ‘alleged’! It’s true! Real! I was the one who sent him there–” The Lickatoad immediately covered his mouth.
Fergy stopped. “What? What do you mean…” The cogs in his mind were turning as his shocked face quickly turned upset. “Oh… oh…” His words quickly turned sour. “You… you forcefully sent Paulie to a party after you broke up with him, didn’t you? You couldn’t handle it and you sent him away. That’s why he erased it! Because it was unfair!”
“That doesn’t even make sense! Especially considering what you know.” The Fudgehog’s scowl didn’t disappear, however. “If you’re trying to knock down my walls just to shove words in my mouth, then I’m not telling you anything else. Not again.” He turned away. He glanced at the hands again, he thought about using them to get Fergy out of here.
“Okay, wait! Maybe… I was too quick to make assumptions. I promise I’ll be quiet.” He pretended to zip his lips.
Langston wasn’t buying it. “I don’t believe you. Now scurry off, you jobless maniac.” He mumbled the insult but made it still audible.
“No, Langston, please! I’m sorry. It’s just…” He trailed off, trying to find his words. He wasn’t really going to open up to Langston of all piñatas. Would he?
“It’s just what? Jelly that I beat you to him?” He crossed his arms.
“Yes! I mean, no. Ugh. Maybe.” Fergy let out a small groan and paced in a circle. “Paulie… he means a lot to me… maybe to you too.” He took a seat and sighed. “It’s just, well, it doesn’t sit right with me that he would keep this secret. Like, I tell him everything! Well, when he’s about to find out.” He whispered the last part.
Fergy’s words resonated with the Lickatoad. His eyes softened as he tapped the control panel, recounting his times when he and Paulie were on good terms. The Fudgehog continued, snapping him out of his thoughts.
“I just, I want to know what he hides from me. You understand, right?” Fergy couldn’t believe that those three words just left his mouth. Him? Resonating with Langston?
Despite his thoughts, Langston nodded in response. “Yeah. I understand.” He hopped down from the panel to face Fergy. Fergy looked up and gave him a small smile, Langston returned the favor and looked around. “Okay, I don’t know how long I can take a break. It may be quiet, but you never know when rush hour happens. I’ll make this brief, got it?”
Fergy nodded as he awaited the frog’s words.
Langston paused, trying to recall his time with Paulie. “Gosh, how long has it been?” He muttered under his breath. “Well, going off on all you’ve admitted, Paulie’s story mostly checks out.”
“Okay, but where does it not? I can’t believe I’m saying this but tell me about the… party.” He shuddered and looked at him.
“Paulie wasn’t always a Piñata Wrangler; you know this. Since he wasn't a wrangler, he had to go to a party.” He recalled his talk with Paulie. How he attempted to convince him. “Paulie was… well, let's say he was more willing to go. He wasn’t as reluctant, or terrified as you were.”
“Hey! Parties are horrifying. It’s not my fault I care about my well being when it's getting bashed and eaten.” Fergy defended, placing his hands on his hips.
“Fergy, it is your fault.” Langston replied. “Piñatas don’t even feel pain after they’re shot.”
The Fudgehog tilted his head. “They don’t?” Langston shook his own.
“That’s besides the point. Paulie wasn’t exactly eager, but he wasn’t dreading it either. It was his first party, and this was before he found out he could run away from his duties and bribe my boss to give him a break.” He shot another side-eye at Fergy, who smiled awkwardly in response.
Fergy paused, attempting to piece together the story as he talked. “You said that you were the one who sent him. Were you a wrangler at the time?” Fergy hoped his assumption was wrong. That meant Paulie lied to him again.
Langston shrugged, “Honorary. I was an intern for the old wrangler. I think his name was Willy.”
“Willy? Was he like a Whirlm?” Fergy questioned. He attempted to imagine a Whirlm out to get him.
A sigh escaped the Lickatoad’s lips. “All I’m saying is that he needed help. A lot.”
Fergy continued his thoughts of a Whirlm in Langston’s place before he went on with his story, snapping Fergy out of his own thoughts.
“Anyway, Paulie said he’ll go, but after some convincing. After giving him good reviews from other party goers, I loaded him into the Cannoñata and sent him off.” Langston involuntarily moved his hand in mimicry of the blast.
The Fudgehog shuddered as Langston described the blast. His Piñatapartyphobia had not calmed in his time at the Candiosity Checker. When he shook off some thoughts, he turned to the Lickatoad. He still wasn’t fully getting the answer he wanted. “Okay, you sent him to his doom– I mean, off. But why did he erase it?”
“According to Paulie, the party was ‘soooo boring’ that he never wanted to do it again.” He shrugged and looked around again to make sure he had time.
Fergy blinked. “What? That’s it? He thought it was boring so he just, erased it from the system?” He thought that it was a petty reason.
“Don’t run to conclusions just yet, Fudgehog.” Langston scolded. “There’s probably more to the story.” He tapped a hand on his chin.
“What do you mean? Do you not know it?” Fergy couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “Don’t tell me I’ll have to come back next week.”
“What? No. I don’t do that. It’s just…” He hopped back and forth for a second. “That’s what Paulie told me, or at least, that’s all I could remember.”
Fergy groaned. He folded his arms and pouted. “Great. I finally got the courage to approach you, and you have nothing.”
“Hey!” Langston defended. “Paulie kept his secrets from me as well. That’s just how piñatas work, Fergy!”
“He probably lied to both me and you. Why do I even try anymore.” The Fudgehog buried his paws in his face.
“I wouldn’t say that. I understand his reasoning, but I just have a feeling there’s a secret reason to it.” He glanced around. In the distance he saw a couple of piñatas walking up the hill.
“Don’t bother, Langston. Paulie is a mystery and the more I pry, the more confused I get.” The Fudgehog let out a sigh. “Watch, the next thing I find out is that he’s actually working for Pester.”
Langston sighed. “You shouldn’t give him a hard time. You have your own fair share of secrets, right?”
Fergy hesitated, “Well, yes. Of course I do.”
“So, why does he need to tell you yours? It’s not really affecting your relationship if I’m correct.” Langston tilted his head. He didn’t know why or how he was comforting Fergy, but he let it happen.
Fergy’s eyes softened as he looked down. “I… I hate to say it, but you’re probably right.”
The wrangler nodded and gently placed his hand on his arm. “All I’m saying is, don’t let his past affect you two. I may hate you, but Paulie deserves to be happy.”
Fergy rolled his eyes, a small smile playing on his lips. “Wow. thanks. I really appreciate it.”
“I mean it. But, sometimes you’re pretty okay, you know, when you’re not making my job harder.” Langston turned back to the approaching piñatas.
Fergy raised an eyebrow, “But that’s like, almost every day.”
“Exactly. You’re pretty okay sometimes.” This comment made the Fudgehog gently punch Langston. The two shared a laugh. Fergy now noticed the crowd of other piñatas. “Well, you should probably run off now.” Langston started. “Unless you want to go to a party, of course.”
Fergy immediately shook his head and hopped off the platform. “No, thanks! I would like to live another day.” He started to scurry off before stopping and turning his head. “Oh, and Langston? Thanks. For this I mean.” He smiled at him before continuing his way.
Langston watched the Fudgehog run off and sigh contently with himself. “You're welcome.” He said under his breath. Surprisingly, Fergy was starting to grow on him. He turned back to the piñatas and quickly hopped over to the panel, ready to continue his work.