Chapter Text
Over the next few months, Laufey has consumed every waking moment he has.
It started with a small purchase: a singular T-shirt from her 'Everything I Know About Love' album. He would wear it in the privacy of his own bedroom, away from prying eyes and the unnecessary questions directed at his new article of clothing.
Now, Katsuki normally has a good balance of spending things that are deemed necessary. Such as his own school supplies, hygienic necessities, his skin products, and even leftover allowance to spend when he goes out with the moron squad. However, when it came to the artist, that idea was blown out of the water and thoroughly ignored.
One shirt became two. Then two became three. And then three became the whole entirety of her merch line.
To say that Katsuki may be running out of space in not just his bedroom, but also his savings taking a toll is an understatement.
While hiding most of his things in his closet wasn't an issue, it began to overfill. Many who entered his room for the past month, had questioned as to why his closet ‘is about to give birth to triplets’.
He just sucker punches them in the balls and claims them to have shit eyesight.
Works every time.
(Most have learnt from their mistakes and now wear a crotch plate when entering the beast's den.)
When his closet could take no more, he began hiding things under his bed. But after that became too cramped, he moved to his own drawers and even to a few of his pillow cases. Even through all his efforts of trying to contain the Laufey Tsunami™, mountains upon mountains of merch always unleashed all throughout his bedroom into a splattered mess.
Desperate, he did the unthinkable and murdered Deku’s Silver Age All Might Plush.
Okay, well, he conducted surgery, unstuffed the plush, and traded it for his dozens of Laufey branded socks and underwear. Such drastic measures of unauthorized medical procedures towards the unwilling plush made Katsuki realize he may have a slight problem.
But he doesn’t care, anything for the Icelandic/Chinese singer.
Following those lines, Katsuki made the pleasant discovery of Laufey being half Chinese. Which makes her part Asian.
Katsuki did a little jig after learning that information.
Of course she's one of us, no brain dead westerner *cough* *cough* Taylor Swift *cough* *cough*, could make such badass music.
(Later on, he did find out she grew up partially in the States and as a raging Swiftie, but he lets it slide because she is still a badass.)
Investigating a little more about her life, he saw that she was crazy smart. Being awarded the 'Presidential Scholar' scholarship to attend 'Berklee’s College of Music' after graduating from her home in Reykjavik, Iceland, Laufey began her journey by releasing ‘Street by Street’, seeing it slowly climb to the top charts in her homeland. From that point on, Laufey has released two full studio albums and various singles under the genre of Jazz. She recently also won a Grammy under the category of ‘Traditional Pop Vocal Album’ for her ‘Bewitched’ studio album. Thus, becoming one of the most influential artists of this generation.
Katsuki feels so fucking proud of her, and being one of her fans, he will support her til’ his fucking grave.
He has taken it upon himself to follow her socials to keep up with the artist, and is always pleasantly surprised by the welcome shenanigans she posts on her stories. Most of them feature her twin sister, Junia, (which double fucking cool) going to book cafes and touring all around the world. Even if Katsuki doesn’t want to admit it out loud, he's grown fond of the artist because of the way she presents herself. It may seem creepy to other people with the way he keeps track of her activity on social media daily, but his intentions aren't perverted in any way. In fact, the singer is on the same level to how All Might was for him growing up. Instead of the roaring muscles and numerous defeats of villains under her belt, Laufey, through her enchanting and clever melodies, speaks a language only a few are capable of producing and speaking fluently. Similar to All Might, she accomplished her own dreams by hard work and many grueling hours of practice to get to where she is today.
And if that’s not fucking inspiring enough, maybe shoving a cello up one’s ass will garner the appreciation for such exquisite art.
Adding to his respect, he’s seen multiple interviews that display her humble yet relatable personality. The most recent one he remembers is by Naudwuar, and the simple joy he brought to Laufey's features when gifting her various classic Jazz albums, mentioning their significance to the genre. Laufey responded in an enthusiastic manner, and went on to explain the influence each of those artists left for her when creating her own music.
Typical in the Jazz scene, most of the songs relate to problems of love and some of the joys it brings to one’s life. Most if not all of Laufey’s songs follow this pattern of telling a story about her own endeavors in love. Katsuki in general usually doesn’t fuck with love, but the curiosity of falling in love, getting heartbroken, and moving on from that experience has now crossed his mind multiple times when given the opportunity. He won’t deliberately go out and get his heart broken, (he’s heard enough of that trainwreck), but maybe be open to the idea and intricacies that love brings. And not in just a romantic sense, but platonically, which could serve him well once he becomes Pro.
Goddamnit he’s grown fucking soft.
Shitty Hair would have a field day if he’s hearing the shit he’s saying.
Speaking of the people in his life, he can see some of them through Laufey’s songs. Ignoring the love aspect of it all, he can clearly paint a picture in his mind of the feelings Laufey is conveying through his own experiences.
When he heard the first verse of ‘Letter To My 13 Year Old Self’, instantly, the image of Deku appeared in his mind. Throughout the song, various other verses fit well with the nerd, transporting him back to those hot summer days spent in the playground beating up a kid with an unreachable dream.
Growing up, he bullied the nerd relentlessly because of his quirkless status. He ensured Izuku had no friends, whispered insults away from adult eyes, and resorted to petty and unforgiving actions: exploding his notes, dunking his school supplies in toilets for Izuku to retrieve, replacing his indoor shoes with embarrassing ones, hiding his school uniform during gym class, and more. No one stood up for Izuku, either fearful of Katsuki's anger or secretly feeling superior to the victim. With no one to stop him, Katsuki made Deku's life a living nightmare.
And he regrets all of it.
After starting at UA and with Deku's new quirk becoming a focal point in his life, Katsuki began to reflect on his past actions. Initially, he was angry with Deku for keeping his quirk a secret, feeling misled and mocked behind his back. However, as time passed, numerous arguments and fights surfaced, revealing misunderstandings that eventually shaped their current relationship: rivals.
Through this relationship, feelings of guilt and regret began to surface each time he saw the nerd. Sure, he would still be annoyed and occasionally act rudely, but unlike before, there's no malicious intent to crush the hope in those big green eyes—the way he once believed was necessary for his ego. He could vividly see Deku reflected in these lines of the song:
‘Keep on going with your silly dream’
‘Life is prettier than it may seem’
‘One day, you'll be up on stage’
‘Little girls will scream your name’
‘The days of tears and failure fears’
‘And no one cares, will all make sense, cause…’
It felt like a punch to the gut as Katsuki placed himself in Deku’s red shoes, imagining the constant loop of endless teasing, beatings, and neglect of Deku’s peers toward his own aspiring dreams of becoming a hero. Yet, Deku never gave up in response. He never succumbed to the rough treatment everyone believed he deserved. He kept writing in those burnt, stained notebooks, salvaged his supplies, strode into class with those ridiculous shoes, always kept an extra uniform on hand, and continued moving forward, steadfastly pursuing his dreams.
‘You'll grow up’
‘And grow so confident, and’
‘Write your story, fall in love a little too’
‘The things you thought you'd never do’
‘I wish I could go back and give her a squeeze’
‘Myself at 13’
‘And just let her know, know that she's beautiful’
The scrawny, quirkless little kid who once was sprawled out on the ground, looking up towards Katsuki with fear in his eyes, is now a confident, strong Izuku who faces opponents with no hesitation. Inspiring many others throughout his journey on becoming the greatest hero.
And Katsuki is proud of him.
He won’t say it out loud towards Deku, but in the dead of the night where these pestering thoughts come to resurface every once and awhile. Now a common theme after discovering the Jazz singer.
He made a promise to apologize to Deku one day. Until that time comes, he will atone for what he has done and encourage Deku to keep pursuing his dreams—
What he should've done from the start.
Following that note, there’s another song that stood out to him similar to the previous one; ‘Questions for the Universe’.
In this song Laufey questions this unknown deity for various things that stand out to her throughout her life, mainly concerning the topics of love, the cycle of life, and human instinct.
Katsuki has spent a lot of time digesting this song and coming to terms with a few things. But most of his attention is stolen by the current moment of chaoticness.
In true BakuSquad fashion, the group is huddled around Sero’s small low table in the middle of his dorm room. On Katsuki’s left sat Kaminari with over half of the deck in his hands, constantly shaking him, begging him to take some of his cards.
"Bakugou don’t do this man, we can talk about this–like bros!” Anticipating Katsuki’s next move, Kaminari goes into dogeza to plead for his life with tears streaming down his face.
Katsuki takes one look at him.
“Eat shit, Dunce Face,” he taunted, unleashing his deadly move: the Plus 4 card, slamming it onto the pile with a shit-eating grin on his face.
(Many of his classmates can recall the impenetrable wails that drifted through the hallways of the 1-A dorms, shifting the air into one of melancholy and tragedy—a testament to the betrayal between one bro to another.)
After Katsuki K.O.ed Kaminari’s ass, the game proceeded as normal.
A few more rounds later, laughs and taunts were exchanged between the group. Katsuki sat back and took a moment to observe.
Mina and Kaminari were arguing over whether she had sneaked a few of her cards into Kaminari’s never-ending pile. Jirou, seated next to them, occasionally added her own input, seemingly siding more with Mina (even though Katsuki had witnessed Pinky cheat). Meanwhile, Kirishima and Sero appeared lost in their own world, engaged in a heated discussion about how whales give birth. Sero, holding his 'Marine Fish & Sea Creatures' book, pointed fervently to a specific section about whales.
“No dude, they don’t lay eggs–the baby is developed within the mother and is later pushed out through live birth!” Sero exclaims as he looks up to Kirishima’s eyes with a look of disbelief. “Remember they are mammals dude–they literally have baby hair across their body’s. No fish has hair.” As he begins to frantically flip through pages to show the difference between mammals and fish with their distinct features.
Kirishima scratches behind his head in a sheepish manner, sporting a sharp grin on his face. “Haha, my bad bro! I could've sworn my 1st grade teacher, Patterson Sensei, insisted that whales were fish and laid eggs,” he says, placing a finger to his chin in thought. “I mean, she was transferred to Japan from the States for a while... maybe it's just a cultural thing?” He shrugs his shoulders.
Sero looks on incredulously at the statement produced by the Shark boy infront of him.
“What kind of food did your teacher eat before class for her to spout shit like that?!” Tape Face then proceeds to give an extensive analysis to Shitty Hair about the intricacies of whale life concerning their courtship rituals, migration patterns, and diet. Almost a step by step on how to become an actual goddamn whale.
After staring for a minute at everyone, those questions come to pester his mind.
How is the Universe allowing him to sit here and enjoy the company of others when he tormented Deku in the past? Will there be a moment in which it’ll all go away just to get back at him? Will he forever expect the worst?
But he remembered that the answer to those questions were resolved. Namely by a red head who cares too much.
A month ago, he told Kirishima everything he did to Deku.
Throughout the whole conversation, Kirishima held a neutral face and didn’t say a word. Allowing Katsuki to express every individual detail he caused to make Deku’s life hell. Mentioning the brutal comment he made to Deku on that fateful day when he was captured by the Sludge Villain.
“You wanna be a hero so bad?”
“I’ve got a time-saving idea for you.”
“If you think you’ll have a quirk in your next life…”
“…go take a swan dive off the roof!”
After confessing everything, he was well prepared to be shunned away for his past actions. The horrible things he said to Deku were now coming to bite him in the ass.
At first, Kirishima did look disappointed in Katsuki and expressed his troubled emotions through his own story of his experiences throughout middle school. He mentioned dealing with low self-esteem issues due to comparing himself to others, especially with Mina.
“She was able to lead the villain away and save the girls, but what did I do? I just stood there man–At the time, I believed that as a hero, you shouldn’t be afraid. I felt so useless and worthless.” Kirishima looks to the side, “That experience stuck with me and caused me to lose a lot of confidence. It didn't help that a lot of the kids at my school never saw me as more than a coward.” with his arms crossed between his chest, he sported a vulnerable look away from Katsuki.
“But I was once reminded through my idol, Crimson Riot, that even he feels fear through the villains he defeats. He would much rather have fear in the situations he is placed in, then to see the dying look on someone’s face.” Clenching his fists on his sides, he gave Katsuki a determined look.
“What you did in the past was terrible, it could never be taken back.” With these words Katsuki looks down and feels the weight of his actions through those words.
“However–” Katsuki perks up. “You feel the guilt, the regret of what you did that many others don’t consider. It speaks volumes that you are willing to improve your relationship with Midoriya, and–I think that's pretty manly.” Kirishima gave a sheepish grin towards Katsuki.
Katsuki looks down at his right hand. The hand that caused various bruises and injuries towards the greenette throughout their youth.
He then speaks in a low whisper,
“But even if I do improve my relationship with the nerd, I will always carry this regret of hurting him.” Bringing his hand down and clenching his teeth.
Kirishima’s face begins to soften, “While you may think that is right, I doubt that Midoriya would want that for you. From what I’ve seen through your interactions, Midoriya holds no ill intent towards you. Now, I’m not sure if he has forgiven you, but I think learning from that experience and the actions you make as of now, will greatly show that redemption.” Placing a hand on his shoulder, Kirishima gives him a blinding smile.
“Until that time comes, show through your actions that you are sorry.”
That conversation with Kirishima reassured him of his troubles. Instead of always being stuck in the past, he looks forward to the future.
Looking upon the chaotic uno scene, he never wants to take these moments for granted.
As life goes on, many of his questions will be resolved. Even new ones will come to surface given the experiences he is placed in. Especially through such a confusing time of emotions and building his own identity.
However, one thing that Katsuki knows for sure about himself is not giving a fuck. People are going to say shit, but, whatever, yolo, hasta la vista motherfuckers and annoying ass unwanted opinions. Becoming a Pro is prone for backlash for every single move that is made across the chess board. Katsuki knows the full repercussions he is getting into.
But he’s come to learn a few new things through his time here at UA and from listening to Laufey’s music—something he urgently refused to acknowledge back when he was younger: the importance of having people who support one another through their happiest and hardest moments in life. Taking slander from fuckmunches by yourself is much more difficult without an entourage of idiots who will beat the ever-loving shit out of said opposers.
‘Will my worries ever melt away?’
No, Katsuki doesn’t think so. But he knows his friends will accompany him through thick and thin. No matter what the Universe’s plans are for him, he is planning on keeping them for a long time.
So, fuck you Universe. Take this uno reverse card and shove it up your deity ass.
“Uhhhh Bakubro–why are you giving Sero’s ceiling the middle finger?”
“If you don’t shut the fuck up, I will explode your ass.”
“Oooo if you insist~”
“THAT’S FUCKING IT, GET OVER HERE YOU SPARKPLUG–”
(The students of class 1-A had to be evacuated that day due to the explosions Katsuki unleashed against Kaminari’s sorry ass.)