Chapter Text
That same night...
The winery door creaked as it opened.
“People keep telling me to replace these with metallic doors, but these have served my family well for hundreds of years.”
“Mmm…” she nodded. “It wouldn’t be very you…”
“What do you mean?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.
“You’ve always thought you could be adventurous by holding on to what’s familiar…”
He tilted his head, studying her as they stepped into the cool, dimly lit winery, surrounded by rows of oak barrels.
They walked in a bit deeper, neither of them speaking. She closed her eyes for a moment, maybe to distract from the nervousness she felt creeping up on her.
There was a mixed scent of aging wine and oak as the cool air brushed against her skin in a sharp contrast to the warmth of the very French evening outside.
They had shared dinner earlier, all three of them, on the patio. The ease of their interaction had been almost unsettling. Familiarity had seemed to have woven itself into their conversation as if it had always been there. But … Nothing between them had ever been simple, so why now?
Jean-Luc had uncorked fresh bottles of Bordeaux, replacements for the ones Jack had accidentally dropped in his study just days before.
Jack had tried to appreciate the wine but eventually admitted he was more of a whisky kind of guy.
She had bitten back a laugh, watching as Jean-Luc struggled with how to set his face.
When Jack had then even admitted his preference for the cheaper stuff, Jean-Luc had made yet another show of incredulity before retreating to his liquor cabinet.
He had returned with a bottle of hundred-year-old whisky, its label faded with age and prestige. He had then poured the liquid into three crystal glasses and launched into a lecture that was part educational, part theatrical.
Jack had eventually chuckled at his father’s rant about the sullying of palates, symphonies of flavours, time and craftsmanship.
He had finished by saying to Jack, and partially to her that if they’d prefer to spend their evenings with less-than-ideal beverages, he wouldn’t hold it against them.
After two glasses of whisky, Jack had excused himself, and she couldn’t help but wonder if the smirk on his lips was meant for her benefit or if it was just her imagination as he bid them goodnight.
Now, standing alone in the cool, dimly lit winery, she could feel a slight chill seeping through her blouse. She trailed her fingers along the edges of the oak barrels as she moved slowly through the space.
“I can’t believe you left me this place,” she finally broke the silence.
“Oh?” he responded, his expression enigmatic, as if he wanted her to continue.
“No, I mean … you know wine isn’t exactly my forte. And this is your family home. As you said, for hundreds of years.”
“Exactly,” he said softly. “So, who else would I leave it to?”
“Jean-Luc, I left …” she began, her voice sounding almost confrontational, surprising even herself. “We haven’t seen each other for over 20 years, and yet you leave me your family estate. The Picard legacy you always talked about as both heavy and … important.”
He sighed deeply. “Beverly … This place is a part of me, for better or worse, a part of my soul. And the other part has always been with you. There was never any question for me … no matter where you were or why you left. I was never looking for a legacy … only to have mattered somehow.”
“Jean-Luc, you’re already in the history books as one of the most legendary Starfleet captains in the Federation,” she replied, a trace of bitterness in her voice.
He shrugged. “I meant … to have mattered to you.”
“Jean-Luc …” She felt anger rising, and she began pacing. “I begged you not to go, not to leave me on Casperia Prime like you had so many times before. You always chose the smallest of emergencies over us … over me. And now you’re telling me you wanted to matter to me, not to Starfleet? How am I supposed to believe that when your actions always showed me that I was never the priority?”
“I don’t know…” He looked pained. “It’s like I said before about when everything became real. I didn’t understand until it was too late. Truth is, Beverly, I didn’t believe I could actually lose you while I maintained some semblance of a status quo. But I was terrified of what might happen if I changed what we were.”
She sighed, already having partially bought into that explanation the night before, yet still burdened by an all too familiar feeling of hurt and frustration. “It’s just really hard for me to shake the feeling of not being enough.”
“I understand. I am truly sorry, Beverly. Everything I did, whether with you, to you, or without you, was always about how much I loved you. I regret not seeing your perspective until it was far too late.”
“And you see it now?” she asked, her voice barely a whisper.
“I do.”
“Then convince me,” she said, her tone insistent.
He met her gaze with intensity, drawing a few deep breaths before stepping close until their noses almost touched.
“Marry me,” he whispered, then pulled her into a kiss, his hands cradling the back of her head. For a moment, he felt a little crazy, but as she wrapped her legs around him and leaned back against one of the barrels, any uncertainty melted away.
His kiss remained fervent and somewhat desperate, as if he were trying to atone for every moment he feared was unforgivable.
The intensity of his emotions pulsed through his lips, pulling their entire past into that singular, and very charged moment.
She tightened her legs around him, her body against the barrel creating a resonant thud that was clearly heard through the dimly lit winery.
As they pressed together, it wasn't only his lips that were pulsing; both of them were almost desperately trying to reclaim pieces of the time they had spent apart.
Their embrace tightened, and her fingers traced along his neck as she pulled him closer, while his hands ran over her back and hips with a mix of tenderness and nervousness.
The cool, dusty aroma of the wine barrels mingled with their breaths and created an atmosphere that was both intimate and felt a little forbidden.
He noticed her nipples hardening, which he assumed was the chill ,as he fumbled with the buttons of her blouse.
A sudden self-consciousness made her pull back slightly, and he paused, looking into her eyes, also with a hint of insecurity.
She felt both vulnerable and uneasy in that moment, and wondered if he was perhaps starting to notice what time had done to her body.
After a moment's hesitation, he cupped her face, brushing away the tears she hadn’t realized were trickling down her cheeks.
His lips moved to her forehead where they planted a gentle kiss.
“Beverly … I … I don’t know if I can…” he said, his voice filled with doubt.
“I understand,” she replied, pulling slightly away, her own insecurities coming through very strongly.
He saw her turn her gaze downward and her chin quiver slightly, suddenly recognizing her self-consciousness as well. “No, no … I mean … I don’t. I haven’t … I don’t know if you’ll recognize us … like this,” he stuttered, desperate from realizing that he was making her feel uncomfortable.
“Oh …” she managed, her own insecurities now mingling with his. “Jean-Luc, we’re both changed. A lot has happened in the last 20 years.”
“Yes, but … You’re still … all you,” he said softly and ran his fingers gently across her jawline.
“Jean-Luc, you’ve spent the past days convincing both Jack and me that you’re still you … and believe me, you are. That lecture today about palates …” She smiled with a hint of relief on her face.
He smiled shyly. “Yes, but … that’s all in the mind. We were always … As you said last night, physically, we were always … good.”
“Mmm,” she smiled back, finding comfort in the fact that they were both shy. “I suppose there’s only one way to find out if we still are…”
“Yes, but what if you …”
“Stop talking, Jean-Luc,” she invited, leaning back and tightening her legs around him once more. “Everything seems to be working so far,” she smirked, her hand teasingly tracing over his bulge. “Any augmentations I should know about?” she then teased, growing more confident.
“No, I was assured that … ” he began, but she cut him off by muffling his words with a kiss so forceful that it sent him tumbling onto her, both of them rolling down the side of the barrel onto the cold floor. She landed on top of him with a soft laugh escaping her lips.
“Ow, definitely no augmentations…” he chuckled, holding her close. “I’m never getting up from here without your help,” he added as his his hands gently started cupping her breasts before he began to remove her blouse.
His rheumatic fingers worked with a blend of eagerness and reverence as he further undressed her, occasionally sharing breaths and the odd laugh as they rolled chaotically around on the cold floor. As he slipped her blouse fully from her shoulders, her skin, now slightly cooler from the winery's chill, felt even more alive beneath his hands.
He almost broke into a sob at how familiar her body felt. While some of its curves and contours had subtly altered with time, she was still unmistakably herself ... everything he had always loved, even to the point of madness sometimes.
He traced the lines of her collarbone and then over her breasts as her fingers roamed over his chest. She noticed the gray in his fine hairs and a slight softening of his muscles. Yet, the strength and warmth of him were still everything she remembered.
They didn’t say it out loud, but they both felt how they fit together with an ease that brought them both close to tears again. Her body settled against his, and though they were relishing the effort to rediscover each other, the shared rhythm of their bodies had already returned.
As his hands moved down to her hips, he felt the softness and warmth that had always been there. He shifted slightly so their bodies aligned perfectly as she wrapped around him once more.
Their kisses grew slower and more deliberate, and despite thinking they needed to relearn how to dance together after so long, it turned out they truly did not.
Then ... As they lay naked and sweating on the cool floor, three thoughts crossed Jean-Luc's mind: Would this affect the wine? Was there a risk of Jack walking in on them now? And ... had she answered his question??