Chapter Text
The morning came quickly, though it was still rather dark. You were awoken with a couple of shakes, your eyes shooting open as you jolted up. Mirella stood by, still swathed in her nightgown and blankets with an unreadable expression on her face. There was no stone-cold mask of apathy present. It was just raw. Her lips trembled in their pursed position, but they gave nothing else away.
It was early, extremely so. Grogginess filled your limbs with lead and begged you to lie back against the soft mattress. However, the somber look that flashed in her obsidian eyes compelled you to stir.
“My dearest child, I’m afraid you must head back to your chambers now. I’d hate to think of what would happen if your father caught wind of you staying by my side last evening,” She whispered to you.
You merely nodded and quietly slipped out of bed. The ground was chilly against the thin skin of your bare feet, and you shivered at the sensation. The estate was always frigid. How unfortunate that you would only be trading it for an abode of similar coldness. You grabbed your blanket and quickly wrapped it around yourself, offering some protection, before going out of your stepmother’s quarters.
The household was silent, almost eerily so. Perhaps it was because you had never awoken at such a time before. The servants had not begun to carry out their duties yet, save for the occasional sleepy guard. Not even the birds seemed to be up based on the lack of twittering and chirps that usually filled the empty air.
You silently made your way to your room. The dawning light had yet to touch any of your possessions, and you had the passing notion of getting some more rest before Rylan came to fetch you in a few hours. However, you felt restless. You silently cursed yourself when you realized you had left your candle with Mirella, so you couldn’t continue on with your research. You doubted you’d have much time to study whilst you were on the journey.
You grumbled to yourself as you paced around anxiously. There was only a small amount of time left until you had to leave. It was mind-bending. To you. You couldn’t comprehend what was about to happen to you.
You sighed as you looked over to see a semi-full bag of various books and small trinkets which you didn’t wish to part with. A familiar tug of your heartstrings compelled you to tear your gaze from them and towards your bedside drawers. Sam’s Letters.
It would be an idiotic decision to bring them along with you. One could get a hold of them and accuse you of taking a lover, of being unfit to be wed, or a number of things. Of course, these notions of you being an unsuitable woman would certainly work in your favor in another situation, however, this was entirely different. When you would act unruly, it was within the comfort and safety of your childhood home.
From here on out, however, you would have little to no one backing you in a foreign land. It was a terrifying notion indeed. Despite all of that, you don’t think you could bear to go without the one remnant of the time where you were happy. You scrambled to pull out the key to the drawer, unlocked it, and reached into the wooden box, and reached for the bundle of parchment.
You sighed in relief as your fingers grazed the fragile texture, the fading ink calling out to you. It worried you that the letters would be damaged somehow, so you wanted to copy the words down into a journal or some other pieces of paper to preserve them. For now, though, you were content to take them along with you.
You carefully grabbed Sam’s letters and wrapped them within a soft, white cloth. Pleased with the little bundle, you placed them in your bag along with your other possessions. You huffed as you slumped back onto your bed, exhaustion dragging you down into a drowsy trance.
You laid there for a while in that spot, unmoving and still, until the sweet sound of birds chirping their morning greetings reached your ears. Some distant stomping could be heard, and you softly groaned in response.
Your demon-like servant had come to whisk you away to the pits of hell. You barely moved when she slammed open your bedroom door, her face twisted up in a dreadful snarl.
" Get up! We have to prepare you for the trip," she commanded as she stalked over towards you. Rylan grabbed your arm and roughly tugged you into a sitting position, and you hissed at the painful pressure in your limb.
" No need to be so brutish. Besides, don't you need to freshen up yourself," you said snidely while you took in her appearance. You brushed off her hands with ease and stood up.
Despite your words, she had obviously already gotten ready for the journey. She donned a simple maroon dress with short sleeves and a skirt that seemed light and comfortable for prolonged wear. It was nice to see her in something other than her regular outfits that she was required to wear within the estate.
She scoffed at your words, face twitching in annoyance. She wordlessly pulled out the garments that you had set out together for this day. It was in a similar style as Rylan's, however, the quality was visibly higher than the maid's. The fabric was a shade of olive green with gold lace and embroidery, a lovely combination in your opinion.
You huffed slightly as she began to ready you. Hairs were pulled, tugged, and pinned down into position, your figure became swamped in the cloth of your dress and your waist was tightened to an uncomfortable degree. By the time the whole process was over, you were already exhausted.
The blonde began to gather some of your bags up, and she reached for your bag of trinkets before you halted her. “ I shall carry that one by myself, no need for you to trifle yourself with it,” you instructed, noting the way she clenched her jaw.
Honestly, if she wasn’t so awful, you probably would’ve felt bad for her. An aristocratic daughter wrenched from her home and placed under the servitude of a girl born in higher status. Truly dismal circumstances. Too bad that you didn’t particularly care. She picked up the rest of your luggage and walked out of your room.
You remained there for a while, your hands wandering over the painted wallpaper and stone that made up the walls of your refuge. It would hide you away whilst you wept, your tears flooding down in your somber solitude. It felt wrong to leave it all behind.
When you arrived in Reeden, you would have to make an effort to carve out a refuge for yourself. Even if you were to be plopped in a forest of snakes, there will always be a clearing where you could hide away in. That was the only way you’d be able to have an inkling of comfort after all.
The sound of quiet shuffling snared your attention, and you turned to see Roland and Duncan nervously peering at you as they softly switched their balance from toe to toe. It was an odd sight to see them wear any other expression other than a cruel grin. You can’t say it wasn’t pleasant, just foreign.
You motioned for them to come forward and greet you. For the past few weeks, you had been attending breakfast with them in an effort to make up for the lost time. Perhaps if you weren’t slated for an unknown fate, you would’ve been able to do the same today as well.
“ I trust that the two of you slept well,” you said as you ruffled Duncan’s hair with a sad smile. The other twin looked away sharply as if trying to avoid your tired eyes.
“ Indeed, although I can’t say the same for you, dear sister,” Roland answered with a small nod.
You hummed, and your hands came back down to your sides. You laughed a bit,” Can you really dare to blame me? Don’t even lambs tremble before slaughter?” They grimaced. How amusing. The three of you obviously cared for each other, but you still held shards of resentment towards them for abusing their favor to cast you into your own personal hell. You parted your lips to further tease them, but you were cut off.
“ -Until we come of age,” Duncan mumbled. You blinked in slight surprise as he raised his head to meet your gaze.
“ You have to hold out until we come of age. Just eight years, and then we’ll come and save you from that bastard,” he said firmly, and you snorted with a grin. Based on their expressions, they were anything but joking.
Of course, you did doubt them. Reeden was a rather large country, renowned for its brute military force and cutthroat political systems, but you could surely dream. Dream that before you reached your 27th birthday that you’d be whisked back into an idealistic life.
“ Those are some dangerous words. Remember, your words are never truly your own once you cast them out. Everything, even walls, has ears,” You chided softly as the three of you embraced each other once more.
You wished to cling onto their warmth for as long as you possibly could, but if you waited for any longer, then you would surely face your father’s anger. You wished you could spite him one last time before you departed, yet you were certain that it would only make you out to be foolish.
“ Alright, that’s enough. No use mulling over the inevitable. I’d rather leave on a high note than be dragged out kicking and screaming,” you said whilst patting their backs. “ Go on ahead of me.”
Roland turned to protest, his mouth twisting into an angry snarl at your dismissal, but his twin placed a hand on his arm, motioning for him to stop. The brash boy’s demeanor seemed to crumple in acceptance, slowly turning and walking out of your room. You could hear them dragging their feet as they left to go and stand by your father outside.
Once again alone, you sighed and turned to your bag. It’s time. You need to go now. Your own mind urged you to simply get it over with your head held high, but you knew this wasn’t something you could just be done with. Your life was over. You were over, and a pitiful puppet queen would take your place.
You snatched it up carefully and began to stride towards the front of the (L/n) estate. You didn’t doubt that everything was already set for you to ride away into the dense forests you would have to travel within.
Some servants glanced at you curiously as you took each step forward. Some held looks of silent pity while others merely smirked with smug satisfaction. The Illy behaved nuisance of the (L/n) dukedom was finally getting what she deserved. It was like they had all forgotten how kind, how pliant and polite you used to be. How stupid of you. Didn’t you know that you were only to be spun into a cartoonish figure of their whispered tales?
Once you approached the main doors, two butlers quietly nodded and pulled them open to reveal your figure to the small crowd of people awaiting your presence. For this one moment, you were able to stand above and look out at those who you were supposedly closest to. Rylan was standing by two horses, one strong and youthful, the other one sagging with age. They were saddled with the bags the two of you would carry. Mirella and the twins stood there, lifeless statues by your father’s side, all of them refusing to look you in the eyes.
That was fine, you supposed. You had already said your private goodbyes, so there was no need for a stiff fabrication right this moment. Besides, they weren’t actually your family. No, they were simply pieces of a larger identity, the one that made the Duke. A young wife, two healthy boys, a large estate, and servants who respected him; All of this fit into his design. Meticulously woven and crafted to perfection. An unruly daughter did not fall in line with that, however, so she must be cut out to truly achieve the greatness he sought.
His eyes narrowed at you, and his lips grew into a satisfied and cruel smile. You bit back the urge to scowl as you made your way down the stairs of the entryway, pristine stone turning to soft dirt underneath the boots that adorned your feet.
“ Daughter, I assume that you’ve already bid your goodbyes?” He asked, gesturing to the other members of your family.
“Yes, I have indeed,” you replied. Your lack of honorifics must have truly peeved him off since his gaze seemed to become sharper as each second passed. Your hatred for the man started to creep up once more. You briefly wondered if you should push it further in order to patronize and humiliate him to a certain degree, but it probably wouldn’t do anything. Not this late in the game, anyways.
“Very well then, I suppose I should give you my own farewell then,” he continued as he pulled out an envelope and a ring that was being hung from a chain. He motioned for you to come forward, and so you did. He placed the chain around your neck with a sense of purpose flooding through the smallest twitches of his hands. Then, you were handed the letter.
“ These will provide you with the necessary proof that you are indeed a member of the (L/n) family. It is imperative that you do not lose these, otherwise, you will not be recognized for your status,” he instructed. You nodded as a sign that you understood.
You went to move towards your maid and the two horses before he roughly grabbed your arm to pull you close. The twins went to rush towards your aid, but Mirella quickly held them from doing so.
“ Do not disappoint me,” he hissed as you wrenched your limb from his grasp. He turned away, and Duncan and Roland managed to wriggle out of their mother’s hold to embrace you one last time. The shock on your father’s face was delectable, in your opinion, and you bent downwards to wrap your arms around once more.
” Remember, we’ll save you from that bastard, one way or another,” Roland whispered, and a pang of unease shot through you, but you disregarded it as you pulled away.
You placed the letter into your personal bag, the fresh parchment contrasting with the faded paper of Sam’s letters, whilst you fastened it to your steed. Rylan silently helped you mount the beast, and you noticed that her movements seemed more refined in the presence of the rest of your family. She probably didn’t want to risk anything in front of someone so important. That you could easily understand. After all, you would be doing the same thing shortly.
After getting situated, the maid hoisted herself up onto the older horse, and the two of you began to embark. The soft thudding of hooves against earth matched with the loud beating of your heart as you drew further away from the estate and closer towards the edge of the woods. Green lively grass, dense trees, and all sorts of creatures lay waiting for you. For you to journey through them to claim a throne that shouldn’t be yours. For you to claim your fate.
You tried not to look back at your home, the places where you had snuck off to spend time with Sam, or the twins, or your dead mother, or Mirella. The place where you came to be. The only place for you. You almost managed, not turning your head back to look at the grand mansion.
However, before you dipped into the darkness of branches, you couldn’t help but stare, longing for a not-so-distant time. As you ventured further, the building seemed to become smaller, the forest started to dim, and the pit in your stomach grew larger and larger.