Chapter Text
There were already three cars parked when Remus and Sirius arrived at the Lupins house, and two boys who must have been Teddy's age were playing football in the garden. Remus went out first, after he took a deep breath, holding the air in his chest before letting it out slowly, almost like an actor before going on stage.
Sirius smiled encouragingly at him, although he himself was not able to avoid being affected by the tension that spread in the air. Remus seemed to notice it, softening his features to speak to him in a calm voice.
“They're just a little too loud, it's not that bad, I promise.”
They finally got out of the van, with a sleeping Teddy in tow and several bags of food. A middle-aged man with the Lupin’ golden curls framing his face saw them in the distance and quickly approached to help them with the suitcases that had been left behind.
The smell of roasting meat could be felt from the entrance, and Sirius saw the smoke in what appeared to be the backyard, where there were already several people and more children running between their legs, their knees stained with mud as they chased a ball, laughing out loud.
The house wasn’t necessarily spacious, but it was somehow full of people carrying and bringing plates, food, bottles and decorations without once colliding with each other, participating in a perfect choreography. Loud greetings, tight hugs and loud laughters rang out throughout the kitchen and living room, without interrupting the cooking preparation for a moment. Sirius was lost in it, terrified of getting in the way of their synchronicity, and only brought his attention back to the present when Remus nudged him slightly.
“She’s asking for your name.”
“Hmmm?”
There was a short woman at his left, one that Sirius quickly identified as Remus’ mother, the same eyes and hair that Remus and Teddy shared, and which seemed to be a family trademark. He must have been staring at her longer than he thought, because Remus nudged him again, this time a little harder.
“Sirius. I… Mi nombre es Sirius .”
“Esperanza.” The woman hadn’t moved at all and was staring straight into Sirius’ eyes for a long moment. Sirius tried not to squirm, holding her gaze as he remembered the screams she’d let out at his own son. He definitely didn’t expect her to be the type to just keep her opinions to herself.
After what seemed like an eternity, she turned to her son.
“Remus.”
“ Mamá .”
Another long silence.
Shit, how the fuck did this woman manage to generate silence like that in such a noisy room was impressive. Sirius would admire it if he wasn't shitting his pants.
“¿Se va a quedar?”
“Sí mamá”
“Y Tonks no?”
Remus sighed, looking extremely tired before shaking his head and letting out a slightly longer sentence that Sirius couldn't quite understand. He was dying to hug him, to reach out his hand and force his once again tense shoulders down.
But the woman seemed to get his son's message, or at least she didn't feel like arguing, because she just took the tupperware and the bags from both of their hands and turned her back on them again. However, before Sirius could walk out the back door into the yard and finally get some air, he felt someone grab his wrist and turned to see Remus motioning for him to follow in the opposite direction.
They had to walk past several groups of two or three people, where Remus stopped to give a quick hello and Sirius tried not to notice the stares on him. Finally, after climbing a small spiral staircase they reached a completely empty second floor and walked down the hall to the far door, which Remus slowly opened, trying and failing to avoid the whining sound.
However, Teddy didn't move one bit from where he was fast asleep in his father's arms. In fact, Sirius now noticed, the boy hadn't made a single movement since they had entered, not at all disturbed by the screams and people around him. He couldn't help himself and stood next to Remus for a second to see if his chest moved (it did move, thank god, the boy was just immune to noises, apparently ).
It was clear that the place they were entering was Remus’s childhood bedroom. There was a layer of dust over a few places, though nothing worrying, and it definitely didn’t take away from the decor that adorned the walls. The place was papered in drawings, from the usual childish doodles, to drawings of superheroes, to paintings that looked like they were straight out of an art museum. Sirius was particularly lost in one of them. It was a house—this same house they were in, surely— but it was surrounded by all sorts of perfectly drawn fantastical creatures. There was a dragon lounging in the front yard, several goblins climbing the walls, and what looked like a ghost escaping like smoke from the chimney.
Sirius was so caught up in it, in the details of the dragon’s scales and the little lights on the goblins’ hats, that he only noticed Remus calling him when he pushed him a little.
“Yeah?... I’m sorry I was…”
“It’s okay, I just need a little help here” Remus nodded towards Teddy, who now looked like jelly dripping from his arms. “I’ve got one of his sheets in my suitcase, I don’t want to lay him down in the dust, do you think you could?...”
“Sure! Yeah, of course, I didn’t notice-” Sirius bent down to rummage through a suitcase, immediately surprised by the state he found it in. “How the hell did you manage to pack a suitcase so well?”
“Practice?” Remus shrugged, at least as much as he could while still holding Teddy, and waited until Sirius had hooked the elastics of the sheet (which was, of course, riddled with tiny ninja turtles) to lay the sleeping boy on top.
“He’ll probably wake up in an hour,but a nap is going to be good for him.” Remus whispered as they tiptoed out of the room. “If you want, you can rest a little too. Even I get tired of the shouting, and I grew up with it”.
“I’m fine, don’t worry” Sirius paused for a moment, imagining the appearance he surely had after the trip “But… I think I could use a bath.”
The bath had definitely lasted longer than strictly necessary. After an hour and a quarter, Sirius had exhausted all possible excuses to bring forward the inevitable. He had spent a long time choosing the perfect playlist, he had carefully checked the temperature of the water and waited longer than necessary for the hair products to work.
After going through the bathroom drawer (the best indicator of the type of person you are dealing with, no doubt) and finding nothing but extra rolls of toilet paper, deodorant, a rose perfume in a bright bubblegum pink bottle and cotton swabs, he had to resign himself to the fact that there was nothing else he could do, and he finished fixing his hair to leave the bathroom, already dressed and ready to face the chaos again.
He had opted for black shorts with some chains hooked into the buckles and a short-sleeved shirt with red embroidered details. Picking out clothes had taken a while too, but no one outside looked too formal (quite the opposite, actually, most of them were dressed in football shirts) so it shouldn't matter too much. That thought was quickly dismissed when he walked down the stairs to find Remus in a shirt with three buttons open, with dress pants that were tight in all the right places. Yes, Sirius had definitely done well to overthink his outfit.
Remus hadn't seen him yet, deep in conversation with a girl who must have been his own age, in a black dress and with dyed green hair shaved halfway off her head, probably a cousin. Remus was laughing and throwing his head back, clutching his chest dramatically as he tried to catch his breath, his entire being lit up in a golden fire, partly from the evening light streaming in through the windows, but mostly just him.
He looked so relaxed, and Sirius was suddenly very aware of the youth in him. Maybe it was early fatherhood, or whatever Remus had been through in his life, but before that moment there was an underlying worry in everything he did. But there was no trace of worry right now. There was not a crease between his brows, no tension in his jaw or shoulders, and the only wrinkle on his face was those wonderful dimples that somehow seemed to double when he laughed so deeply.
Days later, as the plane took off and Sirius watched Latin America disappear through his window, he would remember this moment as a golden light of hope that made the wait worth it, a reminder that it was all worth it if he could see him laugh again.
He was planning how to make an attractive entrance, perhaps approach him slowly and ask him what was so funny with that expression that always made Remus blush, perhaps even lean on his shoulder in surprise, when a meteorite struck his legs, forcing him to stagger and reach out to grab the first thing within reach to keep himself upright. That had been a terrible idea, a terrible working of his primal instincts, because a second later Sirius was lying on the floor covered in food and splashed with various drinks in half-filled glasses that had flown after he had grabbed for dear life onto a white woven tablecloth that was now stained wine red as part of the crime scene.
The silence stunned his ears. The entire room had disappeared and the only sound was the "no, there's no fucking way you just did that" screaming in his head. It could have been minutes or seconds (although Sirius bet it had been hours) until another sound appeared accompanying his thoughts, a single loud shrill laugh, accompanied by clapping of small hands. Just like that, Sirius turned his head to find the meteor that had knocked him down laughing so hard he seemed to choke, his entire face painted in a deep red from lack of air and clapping with his entire body as if he had just seen the best episode of the Ninja Turtles.
And he really couldn't help it. Because he should be angry, because this was the best shirt he owned and now it was stained with wine and food, because he was making a considerably bad first impression on Remus' family, and because this was nothing like the big-time entrance he was planning. But none of that was crossing his mind. Because right now, as the rest of the room began to giggle and a few people outside came over to see what the fuss was about, all Sirius could think about was that that laugh was the same one he'd seen Remus let out moments before. And how much he never wanted to let them go so he could hear that laughter for the rest of his life. As Remus approached them with a terrified expression, dodging pieces of meat and puddles of soda, Sirius could only think about how much he loved that laugh, almost as much as he loved them. And holy crap, wasn't that a terrifying thought? And wasn't it the most honest and beautiful thought he had ever had in his life?
“Moony, please, it’s okay, you can leave it, I don’t mind.”
Remus clicked his tongue and pushed Sirius’ hand away again, completely focused on his task.
“I’m telling you, this gets all the stains out, if you leave it on it will be permanent and this is a good shirt Sirius, they don’t make fabric like this anymore.”
“God, you're so stubborn” Sirius laughed and Remus didn’t flinch at all, rubbing Sirius’ embroidered shirt against a washbasin in the yard. He had been like this for at least half an hour, during which time Sirius changed his clothes again, definitely giving up on the idea of looking put together, he would take the accident as a sign from the universe. Besides, at the end of it all he had managed to get Remus to pity him enough to give him one of his t-shirts with the shoulders cut off. It was black with the letters PR in red and a crown over it. Sirius had no idea what it was, probably a local artist, but it was big and comfortable and Remus’ face changed when he saw him come out with his clothes on, so it had definitely been a success.
Sirius’s shirt was now covered in a strange mix of products. It definitely smelled of vinegar, there was quite a bit of soap suds and he could see half a dried lemon lying on the floor. Realizing it was impossible to get the man out of his head when he set his mind to something, he decided it would be better to ignore it and get him talking about something else.
“So Moony, what’s next in a traditional Argentinian Christmas?”
“Well,” he smiled as he rinsed the shirt for the tenth time, “the first part of the ritual is now complete.”
“And that is…?”
“Embarrassing the guest, of course.”
“Beautiful, you must love that I’m here then.” Sirius laughed.
“Yes.”
Remus hadn’t lifted his head, he was still scrubbing a particular stain that could have been wine or meat, completely immune to the blow to the chest Sirius had received at what that could have meant.
“Well…” Sirius’ throat was dry and he had to swallow before speaking to hide the effect that statement had had on him. “And what is the second step?”
“Well, I think they’re going to start putting together the snacks soon… chips and stuff.” Remus rinsed the shirt, his firm hands pressing against the fabric, every tendon in his arm dedicated to the task. “We can sit apart if you want, but I can introduce you to my cousins, if you want, most of them are quite nice and I assume most of them speak a minimum of English.. just if you feel like it, don’t worry about it, if they’re too loud I understand, I don’t want you to feel pressured just because-”
“God” Sirius couldn’t hide his laughter “don’t worry, Moony, I’d love to meet them. I saw you talking to someone before I fell, it was one of your cousins right?”
“Yeah” Remus smiled warmly as he rinsed his shirt with water for the last time and headed towards the clothesline that ran across the yard, Sirius hot on his heels. “Her name is Lucia, we don’t see each other very often, but whenever we do it’s a pleasure. In fact, you two would get along very well. I can feel it.”
After placing two toothpicks in the ends of Sirius’ shirt, perfectly spread out on the clothesline, Remus turned towards the house, gesturing for him to follow. They both grabbed a white plastic chair and continued out to the back yard, where they found that they had spread out three long tables overflowing with food and drink, with only a few empty chairs scattered around them, as everyone had opted to move groups of chairs around the patio chatting amongst themselves, only occasionally turning around to grab something from the table.
The group that Remus and Sirius joined was definitely the most eclectic and cool of them all, Sirius was sure of that. Lucia, the green-haired girl was there, she and a shorter girl who later introduced herself as Malena, her partner, made room for them to sit, and Sirius ended up sitting next to Remus and Malena, who thankfully spoke fluent English. In fact, communication wasn't a problem at all. Conversation developed easily between the group. Those who didn’t speak English asked others to help translate what they were saying, and interrupted each other to give context to the stories, making Sirius feel included like few times in his life.
It must have been 8pm when plates of roasted meat and vegetables began to circulate and somehow Sirius ended up with a glass of some dark drink in his hand. He was pretty sure it was Remus who had left it there, an identical drink in his left hand as his right one fell on Sirius’ thigh. Yes. He could definitely use a drink, whatever this was.
The drink, which Sirius later learned was called Fernet , had just the right amount of bitterness between the sweetness of Coca-cola , perhaps he would have even liked a little more bitterness in the drink. After that, his glass continued to fill up like magic as the night made its way through anecdotes and laughter. Remus' hand never moved from where it was and at some point between the third and fourth drink, Sirius ended up putting his feet up on the seat and resting all his weight on Remus' shoulder.
Remus didn't flinch, he simply rested his own head on Sirius's, shifting his hand to wrap it around his waist, keeping him in that position. If he didn't have alcohol in his blood Sirius would probably have died right then, imploding from feeling the wonder of Remus' touch on him so naturally.
Perhaps they received a few curious glances from the rest of the group, and perhaps Sirius noticed Lucia winking at him in approval, a mischievous smile on her face. Sirius simply snuggled up a little closer, using the cool breeze that was filling the hot courtyard as an excuse.
The conversation continued and a few lights were turned on as night fell. At some point Lucia forced him and Remus to drink a whole bottle of water each, which definitely helped to sober up a bit and remind Sirius that, after all, he was at a Christmas dinner with people he didn't know, and that maybe being drunk wasn't the best first impression after the mess he had made earlier.
Chairs began to move closer to the long tables, which were pushed together to make one and a herd of golden curlers began to sit around, with conversations beginning to mix between the different groups with varying degrees of drunkenness. The boys had also returned from their games, and Teddy was wide awake chasing another boy his age, both of them laughing out loud, totally sweaty and with dirt on their knees. Probably affected by exhaustion, the race ended quickly when the other boy tripped over a root of the tree in the garden and took exactly three seconds to let out the loudest howl Sirius had ever heard in his life.
He was about to jump at him (because yes, apparently protective instincts were acting strangely these days) when one of Remus' cousins shot up like lightning and took off towards the source of the sound. To say it was surprising would be an understatement, as the man hadn't made a single comment in the entire conversation and Sirius would bet everything he had that he was absolutely high. But he was clearly experienced in the matter if he could move that quickly, having him scoop the boy into his arms and return to the table after lovingly ruffling Teddy’s hair when the latter came over to apologize, hands wringing in nervousness.
“Peter, dejame”
“Pff… pero si no pasó nada!” The man waved a hand at Remus as he sat back down in his chair, the boy sitting on his lap, still pouting “es un solo un raspón, verdad?”
Sirius didn’t understand what he was saying, but he had begun to lightly tickle the boy, who was slowly giggling, visibly calmer.
The one who was clearly not so calm was Teddy, who was still rubbing his hands together and rocking from foot to foot while nervously biting his lip and staring wide-eyed at the other boy. Remus had noticed it too, and quickly stood up to approach the boy when Peter raised his hand again, stopping him and looking at Teddy with a kind smile, extending his hand for him to come closer.
It wasn't long until both children were laughing again, eating happily and with their faces and clothes all stained (seriously, how the hell do children manage to get stained with anything, Sirius felt sorry for the Lily and James of the future in advance).
Remus had whispered a simple "Thank you" to his cousin, who had returned to his calm demeanor. If he hadn't seen the previous interaction Sirius would have said that he was totally absent and abstracted from reality.
Dinner was pretty quiet, everyone was drunk enough to not be affected by the presence of someone new at the table, and the few times someone made a comment that Sirius couldn't understand, but whose look of disgust told him everything he needed to know, Lucia would turn to the other person with a venomous smile on her face and respond with a comment that had to be the perfect mix between passive-aggressive and absolutely hilarious, judging by the giggles Remus was letting out next to her and the fact that none of the people dared to look in her direction again. Remus had been right, Sirius loved her.
Meat poured out of the fire and smoke filled everything while Sirius took advantage of having Remus around to enjoy one of the best honeys in the universe: gossip from people you don't know.
“But Aunt Marta can’t stand Laura, because she’s still mad that she took over Grandma’s land when she died. When, according to Marta, she was the one who was by her side when she got sick. But in reality the only one who was there was her ex-husband, and he wasn’t there much either, he would stop by when he got off work to make an appearance so Marta could do what she ended up doing.”
Sirius chewed on a piece of meat and leaned his ear close to Remus, looking back and forth across the table between the two characters from his new favorite gossip show.
“Moony, does Aunt Marta dress like Cruella de Vil or am I being prejudiced?”
“Right?! I promise we’ve talked about this for so long, and the comments she makes could definitely come out of a witch’s mouth… Am I being sexist?” Remus turned to him with a genuinely concerned look, but something about the speech the woman was spouting behind them must have made him angry, because he quickly turned his back even further to Sirius. “No. She definitely sucks.”
“Tell me more gossip, Moony.” Sirius leaned over him, already too full from the bits of meat and fries that had been circulating all afternoon.
“Well,” Remus’ hand began to wander up his arm, barely touching it and making goosebumps rise where it touched. “Did I tell you about what Raúl said about his brother?”
Ten o’clock gave way to eleven, and soon the occasional sounds of fireworks began to become more frequent. “The anxious ones,” Lucia commented when she saw Sirius startle for the fourth time in five minutes when the sound of shots became too loud.
Fireworks . They were passing out tubs of ice cream and various desserts when Sirius was overcome by a huge sense of deja vu, and he turned his head to find a completely tense Remus beside him, jaw clenched and brow furrowed, left hand gripping the fork tightly. Even the hand that had been gently running over Sirius’ skin was now still and tense against his shoulder.
“Moony?” Sirius whispered, bringing his hand to his waist to get his attention. His mistake was clear when Remus seemed to jump out of his skin at the contact and Sirius immediately removed his hand, his gaze fixed on Remus’s, who didn’t seem to be there at all. His eyes were watery and absent, his tanned skin pale as paper. “Hey, Moony?... Remus?... Can you hear me, sweetheart?”
His gaze was unfocused and Sirius could feel his breathing starting to become labored. Memories of a half-forgotten conversation from the night before began to form in his head.
“We had gone for a walk around the block with my cousins and some friends, we weren’t even that far from my house.” Remus’ hands were shaking and Sirius held them tightly, forcing him to stand up. “That giant tree was the best place to watch the fireworks, we went there every year and competed to see who could climb the highest. ” Peter had seen the situation and was now distracting the kids while Lucia approached Sirius to help him, and forced Remus to walk towards the house. “I was going to win that year, I was sure of it, I had practiced all year to be the one who climbed the highest, and I had grown a lot over the year, so I used my skinny arms to grab onto the highest branches I could, until I couldn’t see anyone else.” Another shot and a horrifying scream came out from Remus’ guts, his eyes closed and a death grip on both of Sirius’ hands. “I’m sure they were drunk. It was Christmas after all, I can’t blame them.” Sirius tried to talk to him, to communicate with him somehow, but Remus just grabbed him desperately and occasionally squealed like a wounded animal. “I remember thinking the lights looked unusually close, and in my foolishness I imagined I was so high I could reach the sky.” One. Two. Three steps. A stumble. The grip on Sirius’s hands tightens even more. “They were poor quality, and it was quite windy that day, so it didn’t take long until the base collapsed and the thing started shooting out in every direction.” The house is dark, except for the light in the kitchen. Sirius thinks Lucia is there, but he can’t tell. All he cares about is the man clinging to him like a lifeline. Like a child. Like a branch on a collapsing tree. “Only two of them are burns, it’s really not that bad, the rest are scrapes from the tree. The doctors said that if I hadn’t tried to grab the branches, the scars on my arms wouldn’t be as bad, but that I probably broke my hip or worse. That I was lucky that thing only had ten shots.” Lucia was forcing one of Remus’ hands off Sirius and the man screamed in despair as he was forced to hold an ice bucket, while the woman walked around the room closing the windows and managing to lower the sound significantly. “You were lucky. That’s what the doctors said, can you believe it, Padfoot?”. The ice seemed to work, and Remus’ eyes opened for the first time in what seemed like hours, staring into Sirius’s like a maniac. Sirius wrapped his hand around the one holding the ice, his other hand still held by Remus, making circles with his fingers that hopefully managed to convey reassurance.
“You’re with me Moony. You’re safe, I promise.” Remus didn’t respond, just blinked a few times and Sirius could see he was trying to regulate his breathing.
“That’s it honey, you’re doing so well. Keep breathing for me, will you?” Sirius brought the hand with the melted ice to his own chest, exaggerating his breathing as much as he could.
Remus was good at taking cues, apparently, because it didn’t take long until his breathing evened out with Sirius’s, and his whole posture relaxed a little.
“Padfoot?”
“Yes Moony?”
“I need to sit down.” His legs shook with the remnants of panic as Sirius guided them both to the couch in the living room.
Sirius continued to guide his breathing for a few minutes, suddenly unsure of how to proceed. Remus hadn’t said anything else and was wiping away his occasional tears with brusque gestures. He wanted to hug him, but the image of the man jumping out of his skin when he touched him remained in his head, so he just stood there, waiting for Remus to tell him what he needed.
They spent a while like that until a green head walked through the door. Sirius hadn’t noticed her gone. There was a plate in her hand as she walked towards them, putting the plate directly in Remus’s face, who reacted for the first time in minutes.
Sirius had to hold back his laugh as the smell of chocolate reached him. Sure, of course the answer was chocolate. Idiot of him. There wasn’t much light, but the plate seemed to contain a huge mass of chocolate filled with chocolate and dipped in chocolate. Absolutely perfect, and Remus devoured it in seconds, scraping the spoon over the plate to catch the last traces and sighing once he was done with it all.
“I'll make more for you later.” Remus looked at him very seriously as he put the plate down in his hand.
“Esperanza froze an entire cake for you to take home, and she won’t let anyone touch it Rem, don’t worry” Lucia laughed, looking at him straight in the eye. “Are you feeling better now?”
“Yes Lu” Remus sighed. “Thank you so much, and l-”
“Shht! Apologies are not accepted.
“But-”
“No”
“It’s just-”
“I’ll steal your chocolate cake if you don’t stop.” Lucia held up a stern finger, finally cutting off Remus’ speech, who was staring at her with betrayal in his eyes.
“You’re evil.”
“I love you too Rem.” Lucia started to leave the room, turning at the door to quickly face Sirius. “Don’t let him apologize, the idiot will go into a spiral of self-loathing and we don’t have that much chocolate.”
“Noted.” Sirius laughed, watching her disappear through the door.
“Hey, I’m really…”
“Moony please don’t start, she’ll get mad at me and she’s the scariest person I’ve ever met.”
Remus snorted. “Lucía? Are you scared of Lu?”
“Terrified. Petrified. Shitting my pants at her presence. If you apologize I’m going to have to face her. You wouldn’t do that to me, would you, Moony?”
“You’re the most ridiculous man in the world.” Remus laughed “how can I stand you?”.
“That’s because you're in love with me.”
Shit. Shit shit shit. Fuck. Bloody alcohol. That definitely was meant to stay in his head. Sirius had relaxed too much. He had let himself be carried away by the warmth and... And he had managed to make Remus laugh again, and the wrinkles of anguish had disappeared to make way for those divine dimples. And Sirius was a weak, drunk man. A combination that wasn’t helping him at all. And Remus hadn’t said anything. Shit . Why hadn’t he said anything? He hadn’t even laughed. Fuck. He had really screwed up this time. He had known this man for less than 48 hours and he had already managed to screw up.
Well. It would be a funny story at some point. Tragedy eventually turns into comedy, right? Sirius’ grandchildren would laugh in the future. Grandchildren without golden curls and dimples. Stupid grandchildren who would only know one language and would never make that wonderful sound when they laughed. And-
“I think I am.”
Sirius snapped his head up so fast it must have caused some injury. Because Moony had spoken, and Sirius should have been used to the man’s ease in stupefying him with his carefree confessions and compliments, but this was different. It felt different, and Sirius didn’t think it was the alcohol. Remus had sounded so calm, so honest, like he’d taken the time to think about it and had had a revelation in the moment.
His face still had a few trails of tears and his eyes were red, his hair was a mess from running his hands through it too many times and his cheeks were flushed from crying. And he was devastatingly beautiful.
And there was really no choice, was there? Because how could Sirius do anything else when Remus was looking at him like that, with honest, raw eyes, absolutely transparent. And how could Sirius look at his mouth, parted in surprise at his own discovery, and not capture it with his own?
It would be a crime, he decided, and Sirius would not waste years in prison when he could spend them with Remus instead. And so he did. Nothing else mattered. Neither distance nor families nor language were barriers as Sirius cupped Remus's cheek with his hand and wiped away the sticky trail of tears until golden eyes closed and Sirius leaned in to taste the sigh that escaped Remus's lips at the contact.
They didn't go out into the yard again that day. When the fireworks started to go off louder, and midnight approached, Sirius and Remus released for the first time the knot of limbs they had created on the couch they had been on for the last hour, and went up to Remus's old room between huge smiles and stolen kisses.
From there they watched the fireworks and wished each other a merry Christmas between kisses, both happy with the gift the universe had given them. Sirius thought that, without the noise, the lights in the sky were quite pretty when they were reflected for a moment in Remus's eyes, or maybe it was just him.
At some point, the amazed cries of the children from the courtyard caught their attention, and they both leaned over to see them crowded around Peter, who had crouched down to their height and was pointing towards the sky in fascination.
“Looks like Santa stopped by,” Remus smiled fondly and placed one last kiss on Sirius’ mouth before taking his hand and urging him down the stairs to the living room. The children came running in like bullets and were paralyzed for a moment when they saw the presents under the tree. Their jaws literally dropped in the most genuine gesture of surprise and innocence, while their eyes lit up even brighter than the lights that still illuminated the sky. Sirius couldn’t remember having witnessed so much joy in such a small space.
Papers flew through the air and the kids squealed with joy, showing off their new toys to each other and immediately starting a game that led them to run all over the living room, almost causing some of the uncles to end up on the floor.
Slowly, everyone said their goodbyes, while a couple went back to sit on the patio, and Sirius and Remus sat back down on the chairs, letting the night pass. Families with children left fairly quickly as well, when the excitement over the presents had died down and they had fallen asleep on various surfaces around the house; Sirius had been surprised by one boy in particular, who had fallen asleep lying on two chairs with his head half an inch from the music player that someone had turned up loud enough. When he mentioned it to Remus, he said that Latin children had different ears than the rest of the world. Sirius had his doubts.
It must have been two in the morning when everyone finally left and only a few uncles who had fallen asleep in the yard remained (Remus said it was fine, and Sirius had no intention of arguing).
Remus's mother had appeared in her nightgown to wish them goodnight, her face significantly more relaxed, although Sirius still had his reservations. She had hugged Teddy and Remus tightly, chatting a bit and making them both laugh. When she turned to Sirius, she had given him a small, but not forced, smile, and Sirius had reciprocated, doing his best attempt to pronounce a “feliz navidad” that made the woman snort a little before repeating the two words and leaving them alone on the couch.
Night turned into morning at the Lupins’ house, and Sirius woke up knowing the wonder of having one of them snoring on his neck and hugging him from behind, and by the gods he wouldn’t be the one to break the spell.
From his angle he could see the window that looked out onto the yard. The drunk uncles seemed to have left, and there was a blanket on the grass that Esperanza and Teddy were slumped face down on. Teddy had some toy that Sirius couldn’t see well (though honestly, it was probably one of the ninja turtles figures he’d received the night before) and was moving his mouth in what must have been a great monologue that Esperanza listened to intently with a wide smile on her face.
Behind him, the snores cut off and were replaced by a low moan, and a clenching of his stomach that made the body behind him press even harder into his back. Sirius had no complaints, and simply let the time pass as he bent himself over and hugged the hand that tightened around his waist.
“Good morning,” Remus’s voice sounded rougher than usual and Sirius felt a tingle all over his body as he turned around to face the most beautiful mess of tangled curls and sniffles that ever existed. An angel who looked up at him with a sleepy smile and slightly swollen eyes, still half closed.
“ Buen día Moony ,” Sirius leaned forward and let his lips get lost in the wonder of being allowed to kiss Remus Lupin.
And, to be honest, he already suspected it, but perhaps it was the ordinariness and calm of the moment that led him to the most important conclusion he had ever had in his life. Sirius Black loved Remus Lupin. Padfoot loved Moony. It was a universal truth that there was no point in denying. He would have to live with it. He would have to dedicate the rest of his life to finding ways to break the distance, to shrink the continents and modify the structure of the earth. All the effort would be worth it just to have the fortune of waking up next to Remus for the rest of his life.