Chapter Text
Over the course of the next week or so, Wednesday barely slept and didn’t speak to anyone, not even Enid or Thing. She retreated almost completely into herself and hid whenever she could, all while the same horrible mix of pain, anger, fear, and jealousy continued to haunt every wretched moment of her miserable existence.
She didn’t play the cello again after that first night, and couldn’t bring herself to write either. Even her school work suffered under her affliction. All she could do was sit in whatever hole she had crawled into, hate Ajax, long for Enid, and hate herself for everything she was feeling. She didn’t even manage to drag herself to the cafeteria for meals anymore, and wouldn’t have been able to choke down any food past the giant lump in her throat even if that hadn’t been the case.
Enid was working restlessly, trying to figure out what was going on with her best friend, driven by worry even more than curiosity, but it was nearly impossible to get any information, especially because Wednesday kept disappearing and Thing refused to talk. Still, after several days of thorough investigating and snooping, she was starting to build a theory that sounded completely outlandish at first but actually made a lot of sense once she really considered all of the evidence she had managed to gather.
But the only way to find out if she was right – and she really hoped she was – was to ask Wednesday, who was hiding again. Enid had already checked all of the more obvious spots and even recruited Eugene to help her search, but she still had no idea where Wednesday could possibly be.
It wasn’t until several hours later that she finally found her, sitting under a tree somewhere deep in the forest that surrounded Nevermore. She had somehow gotten even paler over the last week, except for the nearly black circles around her sunken-in eyes, and Enid was pretty sure that she had also lost more weight than could possibly be healthy in such a short time because she looked almost skeletal at this point.
She looked utterly exhausted and Enid had to forcefully fight back the urge to pull her into her arms and never let her go again. Every atom in her body screamed to go to the girl she loved, but Wednesday was jumpy, and scaring her off even more was the last thing Enid wanted. So she restrained herself, only sitting down next to Wednesday without actually touching her, no matter how much her skin crawled with the need to do exactly that.
They sat in silence for a while, even though Enid was nearly shaking with the urge to speak, to share all of her findings and the way she felt about them. But she wanted to give Wednesday the chance to say what she was thinking first. She waited at least a full minute before she got tired of waiting, already having come to the conclusion that Wednesday was going to stay silent if she wasn’t prompted into talking directly.
“Wednesday, you’re the most important person in my life. You know that, right?”
It wasn’t what she had not only planned out in her head earlier but even written down on a piece of scrap paper so she wouldn’t forget it, but Wednesday looked like she was about to break down completely, so Enid thought it would probably be better to start with some gentle reassurance rather than overwhelming her with an all-out confrontation and love confession.
She had hoped that that would at least get some sort of reaction out of Wednesday, but of course that didn’t happen. She remained completely motionless, staring at some point in the distance and not giving any indication that she had even noticed Enid at all, aside from blinking twice when she started talking to her. Most people would have missed it, but Enid paid attention to all of Wednesday’s micro-expressions.
Still, Enid decided to give her yet more time to gather herself and maybe react in some way, until it became obvious that she wasn’t ready for a conversation yet. Enid could have just let her wait a while longer, but she’d been building up the nerve to have this conversation all week, and now she simply didn’t have enough patience to wait any longer. But even with all of that anxiety and impatience, she still understood that Wednesday needed kindness and understanding right now, and that she had to think through her words before she said them.
“I’m not going to go away just because you’re ignoring me. I’m not giving up on you that easily. You don’t have to talk to me if you don’t want to, but please at least listen. Can you do that for me?”
Wednesday still wouldn’t speak, but at least she nodded in Enid’s general direction, letting her head drop forward once before lifting it up again and turning it to the side until she was almost facing her, though her eyes were still stuck to some point behind her. That was fine, though, Enid knew that direct eye contact was hard for Wednesday sometimes, so she knew that she was listening regardless, maybe even more than if she forced herself to look directly at her.
So now Enid knew for sure that Wednesday was listening to her, that she was probably waiting just as anxiously, but suddenly she couldn’t form any coherent words herself. She knew what she wanted to say, and how to say it, but it was terrifying to lay her heart bare like this. She had to take several steadying breaths before she could bring herself to actually speak again.
“Okay, this is way harder than I thought it would be, but here goes nothing, I guess: I really like you, and have for a while now. As more than a friend, I mean. I was just too scared that you wouldn’t feel the same about me to say anything…”
She trailed off there because Wednesday hadn’t moved even slightly since she started talking, hadn’t even so much as blinked, and it almost looked like she wasn’t even breathing. Enid considered poking her, just to make sure she hadn’t turned into a statue or anything like that, but then Wednesday blinked again, strangely slowly, and turned her head further towards Enid.
Her eyes were wide as saucers and there was the slightest hint of colour dusted across her normally grey-white cheeks, making her look as beautiful as she did haunted, and Enid could do nothing but stare back, probably looking much the same. It was as if time had just stopped around them, keeping them suspended in a perpetual state of anticipation that was already driving Enid to insanity.
An animal walked past nearby, stepping on a branch, the crack when it snapped echoing loudly through the silence hanging heavily between both girls. Neither of them turned to look at it, instead continuing to look directly into each other’s eyes without so much as blinking. It was a really strange experience, and Enid had absolutely no idea how to deal with it, though her biggest issue was that she still couldn’t fully figure out what Wednesday was thinking.
At this point, Enid was pretty sure that she was hyperventilating, and possibly about to pas out from all of that strange tension between them. She was usually pretty good at reading Wednesday’s expressions – better than anyone else at Nevermore, at least – but right now all of her skills failed her and she had no idea if she was about to hear the best or the worst possible news of her life.
There were tears gathering in her eyes again as her mind raced to bring up every possible reason it could think of why Wednesday might not have reacted to her confession with anything other than a stare that was heavy with some meaning she couldn’t decipher. She couldn’t stand it any longer, and couldn’t stay quiet when all she wanted – all she needed – was to have an actual conversation with Wednesday.
“Now you can say something…Please?”
Enid could tell that she sounded painfully desperate, literally begging Wednesday for any reaction just so she could finally have some clarity, even if that meant having her heart broken beyond repair. She wasn’t even looking at Wednesday anymore at this point, far too terrified that she might see rejection in her eyes while hoping for a quick response all at the same time.
If she had been looking, she would have seen Wednesday’s eyes go even wider, and her blush deepening, and she also wouldn’t have been nearly as surprised as she was when Wednesday was suddenly much closer to her. Their faces were barely an inch apart and they were breathing the same air, and Enid once again felt like she was about to pass out from just how overwhelming the entire situation was.
And then they were kissing, and all of Enid’s racing thoughts came to an abrupt stop while her senses went haywire. For a moment, she was too stunned to move, but she caught herself before Wednesday could get the wrong message, and kissed back with everything she had. It was messy and honestly kind of clumsy, and Enid had never been happier.
Sure, Wednesday might not have given her a verbal answer, or responded with her own confession, but Enid didn’t need anything like that, the kiss said everything she needed to hear and more. Not that she was actively thinking that, or much of anything, because her entire mind had been taken over by the dizzying sensation of Wednesday’s lips on her own.
Neither of them really knew what they were doing, but they figured it out quickly, much faster than Enid would have expected if she had ever let herself hope for something like this. It was impossible for her to tell how much time passed, but that also didn’t really matter. The only thing she cared about in that moment was that their kisses kept growing more heated and intense.
Wednesday had somehow ended up sitting on Enid’s lap and was now holding onto her, both arms wound around her neck while one hand kept her head steady and the other played with her hair. Her fingers were surprisingly warm against Enid’s scalp and she just couldn’t get enough of how amazing they felt, even leaning into them as far as she could without breaking the kiss.
Meanwhile, both of Enid’s arms were wound tightly around Wednesday’s waist, holding her close enough that their bodies were pressed against each other, which just served to short-circuit Enid’s mind all over again. It was absolutely perfect, and she never wanted anything else ever again. If it had been up to her, they would have stayed right there forever, just kissing each other until the end of time.
They both knew that they would have to stop eventually, and that there was still a lot they needed to talk about, but that could all wait until they got at least some of the kissing out of their systems. Though neither of them had been willing to address it until right then, the tension between them had been building pretty much ever since they met so there was still a lot of energy pulling them together, refusing to let them part for longer than a few short moments whenever one of them ran out of air.
They would have still kept going this way for hours, just kissing and holding each other close, though Enid distantly thought that she wouldn’t mind going further than that. But she didn’t want to push Wednesday or make her uncomfortable in any way, so she resisted and kept things relatively tame instead, which was still an incredibly intense experience regardless.
The only reason they eventually slowed down was because Enid could tell that Wednesday was exhausted. She was willing to ignore it, at least until Wednesday yawned directly into her half-open mouth. Enid stopped what she was doing instantly, freezing up first out of surprise and then so she wouldn’t laugh directly into her girlfriend’s – were they girlfriends now? She certainly hoped so – face.
It always surprised her how adorable Wednesday could be when she let go of her murderous façade for a while, but she was smart enough not to point that out right now. She’d probably tease her about it some other time, but right now the mood wasn’t right for it. So she just slowly pulled away, grinning when Wednesday’s lips chased her own.
“We should probably go back to our room, I can tell you’re about to fall asleep.”
Wednesday tried to ignore her and go back to kissing, but Enid turned her head to the side to stop her. It took all of her willpower not to give in, especially when Wednesday let out a small noise that almost sounded like a whimper, but she had to stay strong if she wanted either of them to make it back to their room before the sun came up again. She wouldn’t mind getting stuck out in the woods all that much, but it was pretty hard to sleep outside with not even a blanket, and Wednesday really needed to get some rest.
Enid looked at her as sternly as she could, which apparently was not at all, and Wednesday even went so far as to roll her eyes, as if Enid had just said something completely ridiculous. It would have probably been more effective if she hadn’t very obviously been stifling another yawn while she did it. Still, Enid was seriously tempted to give in, an urge she had to fight back for both of their sakes.
But she persisted, no matter how hard it was, and even turned her head away further, though she still held Wednesday close against her own body, far too comfortable to let go, at least for as long as the other girl would let her. Wednesday was just as happy to stay there, even if she seemed a bit upset that they had stopped kissing and was clearly just saying whatever she thought would get Enid to kiss her again the fastest.
“Don’t be ridiculous, I’m fine.”
Her voice was a bit rough because she hadn’t actually said anything all week, but that somehow just made her sound even more attractive, in an almost sickly sort of way. Unfortunately for Wednesday, it had the exact opposite effect from what she had clearly intended because now all Enid wanted to do was take care of her.
She couldn’t say that, though, because Wednesday would never have agreed to go back inside for her own sake, not when she was clearly happy and comfortable right where she was, sitting on Enid’s laps with all of her limbs wound around her like a koala. It really was adorable, and Enid was tempted to let her stay there for a little while longer, and not just because she really liked hugging Wednesday and had longed to do so ever since their first – and last – embrace after they had defeated Crackstone nearly a year ago.
Giving in wasn’t really an option, though. Wednesday needed to rest, and Enid was getting kind of tired as well, which shouldn’t have surprised her as much as it did, but it was pretty hard to think straight with the most amazing and beautiful girl in the entire world sitting on her lap. That was probably why there was a not-quite awkward pause before she finally came up with something to say that might just convince Wednesday.
“Well I’m cold, so I want to go back inside. We can keep kissing there, okay?”
She was lying, of course, there was no way she could feel even remotely chilly while Wednesday was draped across her the way she was, but a little white lie was definitely justified because it was the only way she could think of to get Wednesday inside and they both needed to get some sleep. So Enid only felt a little bit bad about it.
Wednesday considered this for what felt like a really long time, and Enid could practically see her mind racing behind her sunken-in eyes. She was beautiful when she thought, and Enid couldn’t stop staring at her, trying to take in and memorize every detail of her slightly gaunt-looking face. The temptation to kiss her again grew stronger with each passing moment, but Enid resisted, content to just watch as Wednesday’s mind fought itself.
There was clearly some sort of conflict going on in her head, and Enid didn’t need to be a genius to know that it was because she didn’t know if she wanted to give in to make Enid happy, or if they should just start making out again. Then, just as she finally made up her mind, another yawn interrupted her, this one even bigger than the last. Afterwards, she blinked twice very slowly before she finally answered.
“Fine. But I’m going to hold you to that.”
Enid smiled at her, wide enough that her sharp teeth were fully exposed to Wednesday, who not only stared at them but also blushed at the sight. It was impossible for Enid not to kiss her again right then and there, but she made sure to keep it short, barely more than a peck, and pulled away again before Wednesday could react. Then she smiled even more at the adorable whine that earned her.
They took their time getting up after that, but eventually they were both standing, still extremely close to each other with one of Enid’s arms slung around Wednesday’s shoulders and both of Wednesday’s wound tightly around Enid’s waist, holding on as if her life depended on it. It was a bit impractical to walk this way but they eventually made it back to the school regardless.
The doors were all locked but Wednesday managed to get them open in a few seconds without ever letting go of Enid, who enjoyed watching her casually break into their school way more than she probably should have. Now it was her turn to blush, and Wednesday’s to smirk in response, and it was only through an incredible feat of self-restraint from both of them that they actually made it inside.
The stairs leading up to their room proved to be a much bigger obstacle than the locked doors had been, mostly because they quickly realised that they couldn’t walk up them in their current position. There was some hesitation, but eventually they silently agreed that linking their arms would have to be enough contact, at least until they made it to their room.
Enid was honestly a bit surprised at how clingy Wednesday was, and she caught herself hoping that it wasn’t just the sleep depravation making her act this way. She had always made sure to respect Wednesday’s boundaries and her apparent dislike of physical contact but it was hard when most of the time, all Enid wanted to do was hold her close and never let go again. And now it looked like maybe Wednesday secretly longed for the exact same thing.
By the time they finally made it to their room, Enid was completely lost in thought and Wednesday looked like she was already halfway asleep on her feet. She wasn’t entirely sure how they made it inside but then they were both lying in Wednesday’s bed, her heavy black blanket draped over them.
Wednesday was half curled into Enid’s side and half lying on top of her, and her breathing was almost unnaturally even. It would have worried Enid if she hadn’t already been used to most Addams quirks at this point, but it was still strange enough that she stayed awake a little while longer just to watch Wednesday’s relaxed face and listen to her faint heartbeat.
She wasn’t entirely sure what she had expected while they were making their way back to their room – maybe more kisses or at the very least one of those strange late-night conversations Wednesday seemed to love – but it definitely hadn’t been this. They had been sharing a room for over a year at this point and Enid had never witnessed Wednesday fall asleep nearly this quickly, no matter how long she had been awake before. The thought that maybe that was because she had never held Wednesday when they went to bed until now made her feel strangely warm and she had to squeeze her eyes shut to calm down again.
For some reason, that was what finally got her to decide that she should probably get some sleep herself. She turned her head closer to Wednesday’s to gently brush her lips against her cheek one more time and smiled when Wednesday let out a happy sigh in response, then she closed her eyes and relaxed further into Wednesday’s surprisingly soft pillow. Less than a minute later, she was asleep as well.