Chapter Text
“What do you think about this shirt, Pakkun?”
I peeked one eye open to examine Boss’s shirt. It was gray with darker gray stripes, so pretty boring in my opinion, but I supposed he looked fine. I huffed a response, closing my eye to continue my nap. I heard him chuckle, his large palm roughly rubbing my head. I lifted a lip to emit a soft growl; he knew I didn’t like to be bothered if I’m trying to sleep.
Tonight, Boss had another ‘date’ with Steak Lady; something he called a ‘sleepover,’ which means she’ll be spending the night here if I understood him correctly. He had seen her quite a bit over the last few months, and she had even come over to our house a couple of times to meet the rest of The Pack. She seemed overwhelmed at first (who wouldn’t with seven excited dogs rushing you?), but she visibly relaxed when I trotted up to her. Swooping me up, she cooed a greeting, scratching behind my ear. The others were clamoring, jealous and upset at the preferential treatment, but I cut them a look to make them stop.
Boss may be the human member of this pack, but we all know who the alpha is.
I’d been invited to a lot of their outings together, apparently at Steak Lady’s request and to Boss’s chagrin. He’d pout and complain about having to bring me along, but Steak Lady would just laugh at him and hold me in her lap. While I hadn’t been treated to a steak since that first night, she’d bring treats and demand we go get Pup Cups, so I wasn’t complaining.
Boss hadn’t brought any of the females he saw around us before, so I could tell Steak Lady was special. He’d been fretting all day, cleaning and tidying up for her visit, and now he was worrying about his clothes. His scarf was around his neck, as it typically was when he was with The Pack, but I wasn’t sure if he would wear it around Steak Lady.
My crotch was abruptly itchy, so I maneuvered myself to lick at it.
I heard a tongue click. “Really, Pakkun?” Boss deadpanned, gesturing vaguely toward me. “On the couch?”
I looked up at him. Like you don’t scratch yours on here, my face grumbled, snorting as I went back to licking. I heard Boss sigh, some of the others panting in snickers. Why he was so uptight tonight was anyone’s guess.
He flitted around the house some more, doing something in the kitchen but forbade any of us from investigating, and it wasn’t long before the doorbell rang. The rest of The Pack sprang up, barking as they darted for the door. I could see everything from my vantage point, so I stayed put. Boss made his way there, having pulled the scarf up, shushing everyone and ordering them to back up. The door opened to reveal Steak Lady. She smiled at him, adjusting the bag strap on her shoulder. Boss stepped to the side to welcome her in, the pack rushing her as soon as she crossed the threshold.
“Hi, boys!” she called, giggling as she patted each furry head. Guruko and Shiba almost knocked her over, but Boss was there to keep her steady. “It’s good to see you all, too.” She rubbed under chins and behind heads. Suddenly, she surveyed the room. “Where’s Pakkun?”
Always with Pakkun! Uhei howled.
He’s not that special, Steak Lady! An annoyed yip from Akino.
Does that mean she doesn’t like the rest of us? Buru yowled pathetically.
No, that’s not what it means, I sighed, leaping off the couch and padding to the commotion at the door. She just spends the most time with me. When Boss moves her in, she’ll like everyone equally. Steak Lady bent down to pet me, squishing my face between her palms. I snorted a noise of protest.
Urushi barked a laugh. You think Boss is really gonna do that? He’s too chicken! Look at the way he hesitates around her!
Eight pairs of dark eyes scanned our human’s form, reading his nonverbal cues. Yeah, not confident at all! Bisuke huffed, poking Boss’s legs. She’d never pick such a weak option.
Maybe we should help him, Buru yawned, plopping down at Steak Lady’s feet. I like Steak Lady. I don’t want her to leave.
I hummed. I, too, did not want to lose Steak Lady. Besides her obvious advantage to us, I had never seen Boss so happy with another human, besides the few friends we met over the years.
I shivered a bit at the reminder of the loud one that wore gray all the time. Why were humans so obsessed with gray anyway?
Steak Lady had released me and wandered into the living room now, setting her bag on the arm of the couch. Boss seized it, saying something about it ‘being in the wrong spot’ before strolling away to his bedroom.
My head tilted. Was she going to be ‘sleeping over’ in his bed? I hope he warned her that she'd have to claim her space between the eight of ours.
She watched him disappear into the room, her face a shade darker and her eyes trained on Boss's butt. It wasn't anything special as far as The Pack was concerned, but I guess Steak Lady found it appealing.
Humans were so odd.
When Boss got back, he suggested the two of them watch a movie on the couch. Agreeing, they situated themselves on the seat, the rest of The Pack filing in around them on the floor. Just as I was about to vault up and into my place, Boss scooted into it, sidling up to Steak Lady. Realizing this was a perfect opportunity to demonstrate how to impress her, I reared up on my hindlegs, slapping both paws onto Boss's knee. Frowning up at him, I huffed. That's my spot.
There you go, Pakkun! Akino cheered silently, tail wagging. Show Boss how to stake your claim!
Boss met my even stare with one of his own. “You can give it up for a couple of hours,” he argued, bouncing his knee to dislodge me.
I held firm, snorting aggressively, lips curling. That's. My. Spot.
Oooooh, Boss is in trouble now, Urushi sang, snapping his mouth open and shut in quick succession.
Our showdown was ended by Steak Lady picking me up and shifting to the side to place me between her and Boss. “Don't make him give up his spot, Kakashi,” she chastised, stroking my head. “You know dogs are creatures of habit.”
Buru hummed deeply. Steak Lady is more dominant than Boss is.
That's embarrassing. Shiba whined, shaking his head.
We quieted down as Boss picked some show about doctors that Steak Lady mentioned she enjoyed. Getting comfortable between the humans, I propped my head on my paws. Glancing down, I saw Steak Lady's foot running up and down Boss's lower leg. The movement was slow, almost hypnotic, but Boss didn't seem to mind it too much. Lifting my head, I peered up at her, noting Boss's fingers playing with the strands of her hair. She grinned, hand sliding along my back now, eyes focused on the screen as she commented here and there on what was going on. Boss would say something back or make noises of acknowledgement, but I noticed that his gaze remained on her most of the time.
When the show ended, the humans ventured to the kitchen to begin preparing dinner. Steak Lady commenced her assigned task of chopping vegetables while Boss prepared and served our dinner.
“Alright, boys, listen up,” he started, standing with his hands atop his hips. We all sat in proper ‘leave it’ stances, waiting for his command. “You guys finish eating and then stay in the living room, okay? I don't need any interference tonight.” He eyed us carefully. “Understood?” We yipped and barked in almost-unison, more concerned with getting to eat than Boss's orders. He gave the signal for us to go ahead, and we all dove into our bowls. He padded away, back to the kitchen, immediately teasing Steak Lady about her vegetables.
Bowls empty and bellies full, we gathered around to study the humans.
Maybe Steak Lady just doesn’t realize Boss is interested? Bisuke sighed, head tilting. He’s not exactly showing her…
Urushi yipped excitedly. I have an idea! Why don’t we show him how?
Akino leapt up, tail swishing back and forth swiftly. Yeah! he agreed, bouncing in place. Let’s go!
I huffed, brow furrowed. Boss said to stay in the living room.
Too little, too late; the two had dashed off. He’ll thank us later! Urishi called.
Darting up to the humans, the canines began whirling around them, rubbing their furry bodies along their legs and sniffing loud and overtly. They prodded and nudged with their snouts, blowing snot onto their clothes with heavy snorts. Then, to top it off, they stuck their noses into Boss and Steak Lady's private areas.
Steak Lady squealed as she laughed. “What are you guys doing?” she cried, gently swatting Akino away from her butt.
Boss didn't seem to find the fiasco as funny as his counterpart. “Urushi; Akino,” his voice was deep and authoritative. "Knock it off!”
When the pair didn't heed his command, he seized their scruffs, dragging them back into the living room with the rest of The Pack. He shot them warning glares, muttering as he stalked back to the counter. “I'm so sorry,” I heard him say. “I don't know what got into them.”
I snorted. I warned you to stay out here.
Urushi whined in annoyance, pacing parallel to the doorway. Boss is so ungrateful! he complained with a bark. We're just trying to help!
Shiba yowled. If he's trying to mate with her, he's going about it all wrong!
I didn't disagree.
By this point, Boss and Steak Lady were standing very close together at the counter, his front tightly pressed to her back, his mouth near her ear and his hands roaming over her body. Her hand had stilled in the cutting, the knife dangling loosely in her fingers. The smell in the air shifted, some quiet noise escaping Steak Lady's open mouth. One moment Boss had reached up to pull his scarf down, exposing the lower half of his face, and the next he had Steak Lady spun around and trapped between him and the counter, mouths connected. She didn't seem to mind, that noise from earlier louder this time, her arms winding around his neck. Boss slid a knee between her legs.
Is this normal for humans? I wondered out loud, glancing at The Pack.
Maybe? Uhei peered at the couple. Should we check on them?
Pakkun, you go! Guruko huffed. He might need a lookout!
The others yipped and hummed in agreement, so I ambled into the kitchen to get a better look.
Steak Lady moaned, writhing against the leg between hers, head falling back and eyes closing. Boss used the opportunity to put his face to her neck, doing something that she obviously enjoyed if her mewling was any indication. Her eyes popped open, and she looked out into the kitchen, catching my stare as I observed them. “Oh!” she gasped, training wide, gray eyes on me. “Pakkun!” Her face grew darker, and she began pushing against Boss’s chest. “Quit it, Kakashi; Pakkun’s right there!”
Boss groaned, annoyed. “He’s fine, Sakura.”
She pulled a face, shoving him more forcefully away from her. “I am not going to make out with you in front of your dog,” she protested, throwing her hands up. “That’s fucking weird!”
He huffed, rolling his eyes. “Okay, okay.” He parted from her, stomping toward me. He lifted me up, walking to the couch to deposit me atop it. I grunted, scrambling to get my footing back.
Boss's eyes were narrowed in a glare. “Stop blocking me, you little asshole!” he hissed quietly, casting a sidelong glance at Steak Lady, leaning on one of the kitchen counters.
I shook my head, one ear flopping into my face. Human mating rituals were so strange; when dogs wanted to mate, a female would present herself, and that would be that. Steak Lady showed clear interest in the Boss (why else would her smell change when she was near him?), and yet he had to go through some weird, back-and-forth behaviors with her before they could get to the act.
This was why humans could never be the alphas of a pack; they were so backwards.
“Stay,” Boss commanded, pointedly meeting the eye of every canine in the room, marching back into the kitchen. Whatever momentum he built with her was apparently halted, for they went back to simply chatting as they made dinner together. He didn't pull his scarf back up, and I saw Steak Lady sneaking peeks at him from her peripheral.
Now what? Uhei whined, flopping onto his side dramatically. There's no way Boss can convince Steak Lady to mate with him without our help!
Bisuke yipped softly. I don't know…He seems like he's doing okay? He tossed his nose in the humans’ direction. Steak Lady makes a lot of weird noises when he ruts on her.
Is that really what human mating looks like? Akino huffed, buying his face into the floor, throwing his paws over his face. Gross. Why can't he just mount her and get it over with?
I sighed, snorting. Humans have different rules, I guess.
Maybe human females like weak options? Buru suggested with a grunt, using his massive back paw to scratch behind his ear.
Shiba twirled in place, tail wagging rapidly. You mean they prefer submissive males? Maybe Boss does have a chance after all!
Guruko huffed a light bark. Steak Lady needs better standards.
Urishi lowered down, growling under his breath in warning, teeth bared in a snarl. We're benefitting from her low standards, so stuff it!
What did you say?! Guruko rankled, teeth on full display, growls echoing throughout the living room. The two dogs rotated around one another, preparing to fight.
My own bark was booming, disrupting their deadlock, followed by a menacing growl of my own. Knock it off!
(“Um, should you be stopping that?”
“Nah; Pakkun’s got it handled.”)
Urushi and Guruko grumbled, but complied. We need to be working together, not fighting. I shook out my body, fixing them both with a look.
Yeah, yeah, Urushi groused, lying down. Guruko sat, tossing his head, but said nothing. A silent submission.
Unsure of our next course of action, we elected to bide our time and think. Despite our best efforts, Boss was insistent he didn't want our help with wooing Steak Lady.
They finished the food and ate at the island, working together to clean everything up. Steak Lady excused herself to the bathroom, and she smiled at us as she traipsed to the hall. Boss exited the kitchen, plonking onto the living room floor. He whistled, calling us to him. We crowded around, me settling in his lap. He patted my head with one hand, using the free one to tend to the other dogs. “Why are you guys being so obnoxious, huh?” he posed, shaking his head. “What's your deal?”
I huffed, throwing my nose in the direction of the hallway, to Steak Lady.
Boss followed my direction, brow furrowed until it shot up in understanding. “Sakura?” he verified, to which I nodded. He clicked his tongue, lips tilting in an apologetic look. “I'm sorry, boys; I haven't been paying much attention to you, huh?” The Pack yipped and whined, bumping into him with cold, wet noses. “You know you eight are very important to me, but Sakura is very important to me, too.” He paused, then sighed. “I want her to be a member of our pack, and I hope you all do as well.”
Uhei groaned. That's what we've been trying to do!
Man, Boss really is clueless, huh? Buru grunted, ramming Boss's shoulder with his massive head.
Since Boss lacked the sensitive hearing we had, he didn't notice Steak Lady's return. I turned my head to look at her, noting the pleased curl of her lips. “Oh?” she intoned, stepping more fully into the room. “I get to be a part of the pack, hmm?”
Boss jolted, eyes flying to meet hers. He stammered a bit. “W-well…” He chuckled nervously, scratching behind his head. “If you want to, of course…”
She pushed her way through the sea of fur, holding her hand out to Boss. He set me on the ground, encasing her hand in his before rising to his feet. Still smiling, she snaked her arms around his waist, rising to her tiptoes to press her lips against his cheek, then chin, then the tip of his nose. She glanced around the floor. “I'm sorry boys,” she announced. “I'm going to need to borrow your dad for just a bit.” Her voice dropped to a whisper, eyes narrowed meaningfully. “Maybe it's time for the ‘sleeping’ part of our sleepover…What do you think, Kakashi?”
Boss's face broke out in a huge grin. “As my lady wishes,” he replied, bending down to place an arm beneath her legs and sweeping her off her feet. She squealed, giggling as she held onto him. “Goodnight, boys!” Boss called from Steak Lady's neck, her laugh echoing down the hall before the bedroom door slammed shut behind them.
Clearly dismissed for the evening, and exiled from the bed, The Pack settled in our respective spots around the living room on the various beds and mats Boss placed for us. I hopped up onto the couch, circling the middle cushion before lying down.
Is Boss really going to be okay in there with Steak Lady, Pakkun? Bisuke whined from the floor, laying his head sadly on his folded paws, ever the worrier.
Yeah, I huffed, flinching a bit as a particularly sharp, high-pitched cry pierced my hearing. I think he’ll be just fine.