Chapter Text
Seeing his family sort of broke Tommy. As soon as Niki guided him backstage, he ran. He ran past the bathrooms, past the dressing rooms. He went out the back door, as fast as he could. He ran for a long time. Tommy found himself in an unfamiliar field, when he finally slowed down to catch his breath. He was still in his concert black. His shoes weren’t made for running. They were broken now, and they had cost him a decent amount of money. His money. Seeing his socks through his shoes broke down the wall Tommy had built in his mind, a fragile thing supposed to protect him from his own feelings. He was crying over his shoes, but he wasn’t really. He couldn’t stop thinking about his brothers. They had invaded his one place he could be himself. They made it foreign and unnatural. His father had seen him. Tommy thought he had put it all behind him, that he was ready to move on from all this resentment. But it was still in his body, a tight ball of emotion that stuck in his gut.
Tommy bent over and threw up. He moved away from it, the smell already infiltrating his nose. He let out a sort of broken sob, and laid on the ground. He didn’t know how long he was there for. He didn’t think he cared too much. Nothing he had was his anymore. What was the point in caring about anything? The one thing he loved about his life had been ruined. It was taken, just like everything else, by his brothers.
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Niki lost her grip on Tommy as soon as they were backstage. He started running, faster than she had ever seen him. She called after him, but he either didn’t hear her, or didn’t bother looking back. After her next blink, he was out the back door. Niki did the only thing she could think of.
“Ranboo! Tubbo! We have a problem,” she yelled, running into the boys dressing room without a second thought. “It’s- his- they’re here- his da- brothers- Tommy,” She was out of breath, and the boys had trouble understanding her.
“Niki, slow down. What’s this about Tommy now? I know he can get insecure after his performances, but tonight went really well I thought?” Ranboo asked. He was looking at Niki with concern.
Niki took a deep breath, then explained what happened. As she did so, more of their friends started to tune in. Many of them knew that Tommy had trouble at home, to an extent, some more than others. Some of their faces fell, but Dream’s grew steely.
“We have to find him. Knowing him, he’s not going to come back on his own,” Dream said, his eyebrows knitting together in worry. “I think only some of us should go. Just the ones he’s closest to. It’ll be hard enough for us to convince us to come back, let alone someone he doesn’t trust as much. Just Tubbo, Ranboo, Niki, Karl, and me.” The members not mentioned looked like they might argue, but one look from Schlatt quieted them. “Get changed, and split up. Text if you find him.” He pulled Niki aside, and whispered something in her ear that the others couldn’t hear. “If it comes down to it, call Technoblade, or even Wilbur. Do not call his father.” She nodded in understanding. Wilbur was blowing up her phone, sending text after text, asking questions about Tommy. Niki didn’t understand what he could’ve done to encite such a reaction just from his presence, but she trusted Tommy. He had his reasons not to trust Wil, even if Niki loved him.
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Tommy hadn’t moved in a while. He couldn’t tell how much time had passed, but he saw the sky go from blue to black. He liked looking at the stars, but they were covered now. He was pretty sure it had started raining at some point, but he couldn’t really tell. He didn’t mind, he liked the rain. He thought he heard somebody calling his name, but it sounded far away. It was probably his imagination, because who would come looking for him in the middle of the night like this? He wanted to believe his friends would, but he hoped they weren’t. Not because he didn’t want to be found. That’s definitely not the reason. He just didn’t want to inconvenience them. Yeah. He knew he should get out of the rain at some point, but he couldn’t will his body to move. So he just stared up at the sky, wishing the clouds would move out of the way so he could see the stars.
He heard voices again. Closer this time, and more of them. They sounded like, his brothers? Why were they out here? They were getting louder. Yep, definitely Technoblade and Wilbur. He almost wanted to call them their nicknames, from when he was small. Tommy didn't know why he had the urge all of a sudden.
“Holy shit, I found him.” That voice sounded like Techno. But, strangely, he sounded hoarse, and quiet. Quiet was not unusual for him, but this time it seemed small. He heard footsteps, and a gasp from who he could only assume was his other brother. Wil. He used to love Wilbur.
“Tommy,” Wilbur exhaled. It sounded like he was crying. Weird. Tommy tried to sit up, tried to say something, but nothing was coming out. He could barely keep his eyes open. “Techno, what’s wrong with him? Why isn’t he moving?” Wilbur looked panicked, floundering about Tommy, trying to get him to sit up.
“I- I don’t know Wil, I really don’t. Let's just try to get him warm.” Techno’s eyes shone with fear, something Tommy hadn’t seen in a long time. He felt himself get picked up, but that’s all he could fee before his vision went black.
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It was a couple hours after the show had ended. Technoblade was sitting on the couch, with a cup of tea, eyeing the door. The whole house had tension filling it, waiting for one sharp word to break it. That’s when Wilbur walked into the room, holding his phone in one hand, worry and fear plastered across his features.
“We have to go, right now.” Wilbur’s voice cracked, something that happened very rarely. Techno jumped up, grabbing his keys and putting on his boots without asking questions. Once they were in the car, Wilbur started explaining. “Niki hasn’t seen Tommy since the show ended.”
“But that was hours ago!” Techno’s eyes widened, an emotion filtering through them he hadn’t shown in a long time.
“Exactly.” A grim look passed over Wilbur’s face, making him appear older than he was. “Apparently Tommy ran out of the theatre after we left, and he hasn’t reached out to anybody since. We have to find him, Tech.”
“We will.”
They searched for a long time, through various buildings and parks. They yelled for Tommy, and both brothers had red-rimmed eyes by the time they approached the field. “He wouldn’t be in this field you don’t think, right Techno?” Wilbur looked afraid of the possibility.
“The best we can do is look. I don’t know where he is.” Techno and Wilbur split up the field, walking over every inch of it. “Holy shit, I found him!” Techno yelled, and Wilbur came running over.
“Oh my god,” Wilbur whispered, too scared to vocalize anything louder. “Tommy,” he exhaled, while examining his younger brother. He looked sick, his eyes were half-open and glazed over, like he wasn’t really there. His clothes were soaked through, and his shoes were wearing down. He looked cold, but he wasn’t shivering. His lips were tinged, as well as his fingertips. He was barely breathing. Wilbur tried to get him to sit up, but he wouldn’t do it. Wil picked Tommy up, and felt the boy go slack in his arms. When he looked, Tommy’s eyes were rolled back into his head.