Chapter Text
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19:07, Library
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⋆✩⋆} “Uh… Why- Why wouldn't I be…?” He fidgeted with his sweater sleeves, standing up to leave. “And- And I have to… go fill out… some paperwork…?” Shelly grabbed his hand, then immediately went red and let go.
⋆✩⋆} Shelly stepped back and rubbed her forearm. “I'm- I'm sorry, that wasn't my place, but we really need to talk.” Astro's face grew hot at the thought of her, the sheer thought of her hand touching his. He stumbled back a tiny bit.
⋆✩⋆} “About… what…?” He said timidly, prepared to lie his way out. Shelly fidgeted with her hands and chuckled nervously. She stayed silent, trying to figure out how to word this.
⋆✩⋆} She whispered “I… I know what you’ve been doing. I went to check up on you, so I- I went to your room and… and I saw the blood.” Her eyes drifted down to his wrist. Both of them, she didnt know which one he had cut. “I know how to bandage cuts well… would you like me to help you…?” Astro didn't know what to do, he was panicking. She knew. She really knew. Play it cool, Astro.
⋆✩⋆} “Why- that's uh- there's a logical reason for that, its-” He blinds her temporarily with stardust (yellow dissolving glitter) and runs away. God, how will he be able to show his face now? He’ll be the most hated toon, right after Shrimpo. God… He ran to his room, locking the door. Shelly must be furious at him. He just blew her off like that. Who wouldn’t? If somebody almost found out their biggest secret, they’d want to run too… He’s just digging himself into a hole. He looked at his bandages, seeing them come unraveled. Oh, he should've taken Shelly’s offer. He didn't know how to tie his own bandages. And it’d help him not get infected… He’ll do it later. He felt guilty about pushing Shelly away, she was just trying to help… he should go apologize. Later, it would be awkward to apologize now. He sat at his table and grabbed a coloring book. When was the last time he relaxed? He grabbed some crayons and started coloring. It was messy, like a five year old drew it, but Astro found it endearing. The others would probably find it odd, an adult coloring with crayons. He sighed and tried to push the thoughts away. He couldn’t relapse again. That would be horrid. He hated feeling like that, but in the moment he felt free. He went back to coloring and put on some music with the music box Boxten gave him for his birthday.
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20:07, Cafeteria.
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⋆✩⋆} Astro went to the cafeteria for a late dinner. He didn't often feel hungry, usually if he ate he felt nauseous. But the hunger pains were growing on him, so he supposed he had to eat something. He grabbed a bowl of oatmeal, like he had for breakfast that morning. It tastes horrible, like always. He sees nobody around, giving him a sense of security. He eats his oatmeal calmly, and when he's done he puts his dishes in the communal sink. He turns around and sees Shelly, walking to grab something she had left behind. A little glitter was in her brown hair, left over from Astro's feeble attempt to get away from her questioning. He was frozen. He prayed to Mother Nature that she wouldn't notice him. He turned around and washed his dishes quietly, but despite his prayers Shelly had noticed him.
⋆✩⋆} “Astro! Hey…” A twinge of pity was found in her voice, making Astro feel even worse. He turned around and waved shyly. Please just have her go away… “I… uhm, is it a good time to talk…? I'm really worried, and I don't want you to feel this way… Please talk to me…?” Shelly's pleading made Astro worry about her, too. Her sincereness made him wonder if she had gone through the same thing as he… He sighed and nodded.
⋆✩⋆ }“Yeah… yeah, I'll… I'll talk.” He whispered, wiping his mouth on reflex. “I- I'm sorry about the glitter…” He fidgeted with his starred sweater, shuffling his feet against the paneled floor. The cafeteria seemed almost eerily dark, the trees whistling outside and the drapes staying still. He felt unsafe. Vulnerable. He walked away, looking at Shelly for her to join him. She smiles softly and joins him, walking to a secluded office that used to be Arthurs’ when he was their manager. Astro signs and sits in a beanbag chair, scratching his jeans. “Uhm… what… what did you want to talk about…?” Shelly shuffled on her feet, nervous.
⋆✩⋆} She picked up a stuffed animal and sat on the other beanbag, looking around. Astro noticed old details in Arthurs’ office, such as posters of old episodes his fellow actors were in, pictures Astro and his friends made for Arthur, pictures of him and Delilah from the 1980’s, overall his childhood smashed into batter and baked into a cake. The walls were bright yellow, and the beanbags being red and blue, matching the primary color theme. He felt oddly at home here, used to being here. He remembers a time when he could just sit down and tell Arthur his problems. He missed Arthur. After Delilah took over the business, he started to feel as if his fellow actors were not the priority anymore, like she didn't care about their safety. Or their health. Or anything, for that matter. The only thing Delilah cared about was money. And now, since their only legal guardians were missing, they were under house arrest. For reasons he couldn't understand, but the legal system didn’t trust a bunch of teenagers. Shelly brought him back to reality, playing with his hair. Something she used to do for him when he was panicking as a kid. “Hey… come on, whats wrong…?”
⋆✩⋆} Astro fidgeted with his sweater sleeves again, then sighed. “I… well, I don't really know where to start, uh…” Shelly smiled softly, and side-hugged him. Astro's heart was beating irregularly, his palms were getting sweaty, and he was getting awfully nervous. Shelly was so pretty…
⋆✩⋆} “Hey, it's okay! You don't have to say anything right now, just… think.” She let go of him and hugged a plushie of her cartoon self. He grabbed one of his own cartoon plushies based on him and hugged it as well. He smiled at Shelly and began to think. “Whatever you think, just… say aloud. It helps. Trust me, I'm here for you.” She smiled a smile that made Astro's heart flutter, as he sank into the beanbag.
⋆✩⋆} “Uh… I don't like the way I look, I… I self-harm, I relapsed the other night, actually, and uh, everybody leaves me out, I think I’m fat… uh… people think I'm still on Dandy’s side even though we broke up when it happened… ah, uhm… I think that's it?” Astro fiddled with his jeans, flipping the pocket flaps up and down. He chuckled nervously and looked at Shelly. She had never known this, so it was natural for her to be a bit stunned. They have been friends since they came here as kids. She held his hand, making him smile. “I… uh, thank you for… for offering to help me. It really makes me feel… appreciated.” He leaned his head on her shoulder.
⋆✩⋆} Shelly smiled and leaned her head on his. “I'm happy. I hope you can rely on people more, ya know? It… it pains me to see you feeling this way.” Her face flushed a tiny bit, making Astro wonder why. “I- I mean it would suck to have anybody feel this way, and- and I- ugh…” She covered her face with her free forearm. Astro giggled and squeezed her hand. He liked teasing her usually, but this felt different… he couldn't place why though.
⋆✩⋆} “Hey, it’s okay! you don't have to be embarrassed. I’m confused on why you are, but you're just trying to help. Thank you.” He smiled, glad she was here with him. She sighed and stayed quiet, like Astro did. The silence wasn't awkward, not at all. It was comfortable. He closed his eyes, and hummed a melody both of them knew by heart. Shelly started humming along when she could identify what song it was. He looked up at her. She was so beautiful, majestic even. How did he deserve such a great friend…? He didn't. “I don't deserve you-” he whispered, hoping she didn't hear him. It just came out. Usually he was great at hiding what he thought. Maybe something made him feel… safer, with Shelly. He smiled at the thought. Shelly didn't seem to hear it, but she did squeeze his hand a bit. He giggled. Why was he so giddy all of a sudden? It was just Shelly. He knew why. But he didn't want to agree with them. Shelly couldn't possibly think of Astro as anything but friends. But a boy could dream, right? They sat in comfortable silence, Shelly sometimes rubbing Astro’s knuckles. He wished this could stay forever.
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13:23, Floor 8
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⋆✩⋆} Confusingly, nobody had died yet. Or rather, had to go back up to the lobby. Since Delilah left after the gas leak, his friends decided to go explore on their own. He just tagged along, making sure people were energized. He had a lot, and by a lot it was a lot of Pop from Poppy when she didn’t go on runs, and when she did he was morale support, getting people hyped up. Everybody thought he was a joke, but he did know how to avoid the gas better than anybody. Despite being the ‘leader’ during runs (he wore glow-in-the-dark starred shirts for blackouts), nobody talked to him. Besides Vee, Shelly, Dazzle, or Boxten. But other than that, nobody. They were all scared that he would run back to Delilah’s favourite, Dandy. He hated him. But the day came when he had to talk to Dandy. He was also good at getting deals for the rest of the crew. When his shop popped up (god knows what's in his storage area…), Astro jumped in surprise. He sighed and turned around, hoping not to speak to Dandy today. But alas, Dandy always needed to get his way.
⋆✩⋆} “Heyyy, pretty boy. Anything you’d like to buy?” Dandy said in that horrible flirty tone. Astro shuddered and shook his head. Dandy huffed. “Well, I’m not letting your crew of… three-” He laughed for a minute before continuing. “three… whoo! That's… wow. Well, until you buy something I'm not letting you guys descend.” He winked and giggled. Astro rolled his eyes and turned around, looking at Dandy’s supply.
⋆✩⋆} “seriously, three stopwatches…? at least i’ll know what time it is…” He thought and spent eighteen tapes on one. “thanks…” Astro muttered out, walking away. He was so annoyed with Dandy. Or angry. Dandy caused this whole mess, and he expected to just be… forgiven for it…?! He was the one exploring the lowest floor, He’s the boy who caused the gas leak, and he didn't… even care! Astro clenched his fist, waiting for the door to open. Why wasn't it opening??
⋆✩⋆} Dandy cleared his throat. “Hey… what's up with you and Shelly?”