Chapter Text
Jackie follows Shauna up to the attic. She sits down on Shauna’s makeshift bed. She couldn’t help but feel easily pursued by Shauna. The walls Jackie surrounds herself with always come crumbling down for Shauna. Despite all she had done, all Jackie wanted was for Shauna to comfort her, was that normal?
“I’m sorry Jackie- I really should have gone outside and got you. I didn’t even realize it started to snow. I don’t know what I would’ve done out here if you di-“ Shauna begins to tear up. “You’re my best friend Jackie-“ Shauna tries to add before Jackie cuts her off. “Why Shauna?” Jackie says. “I can’t seem to understand why you did it” she adds desperately as she looks down fumbling with her hands.
Shauna avoids Jackie’s gaze.
“I don’t…know why” she responds. Jackie rolls her eyes, she feels her body heat up. She’s angry that Shauna can’t form a proper response. Why can’t she? You don’t understand why you slept with your best friend's boyfriend? Jackie couldn’t comprehend it. It's not that she was upset that it was Jeff, she’s upset that Shauna was able to do that to her. Of course she wanted Jeff all to herself- no it wasn’t even that. It was Shauna. She wanted Shauna all to herself, and for Shauna to give her virginity away so easily to Jackie’s boyfriend- who she hadn’t even lost her v-card to. It was a messed up situation. Jackie knew it and so did Shauna. Both of them stood in silence. The cold cabin air brushes against the back of Jackie’s neck. She couldn’t help but shiver.
“You don’t know why you slept with MY boyfriend?” Jackie presses the girl. She turns her head so she’s facing Shauna now, her eyes filled with anger and betrayal. “Why couldn’t you just find your own boyfriend? Why Shauna?” Jackie adds. “Who started it anyway” she asks Shauna who has avoided Jackie’s gaze the entire time. Shauna glanced at Jackie then back down at her feet. “Wow…it was you. You started it” Jackie says, her eyes filling with tears. “I can’t believe you Shauna, after all we went through-“ Jackie starts before Shauna cuts her off. “Really Jackie? What have you been through, huh? I’d love to know what has gone wrong in your picture perfect life. You get everything you want, you always have. Everything just falls into place so easily for you.” Shauna spits out, rage fueling her words.
“And how would you know Shauna? You never ask me how I am, or what’s going on in my head. Last time I checked you were too busy screwing my boyfriend then writing in your fucking journal about it!” Jackie yells back at Shauna. “The lack of communication is the issue Shauna and honestly I can’t believe last night you would’ve rather let me freeze to death, than to ever come and bring me back inside.” She adds. Shauna chuckles. “You’re one to talk about communicating Jackie. You won’t even fuck your own boyfriend because you’re too scared. Or the countless times he would be rubbing your lip instead of actually making you cum-“ Shauna is cut off by Jackie yelling before she can continue. “Why does it always go back to Jeff!!! If you wanted him that bad why didn’t you tell me from the beginning? Freshman year when you helped me get with him Shauna!” She says helplessly, throwing her arms up in defeat. Shauna’s mind races back to all the times Jackie would ask her to “practice kissing” for Jeff- even after the two had been dating for well over a year. All the hickies, the kissing, the touching. It was all too much yet not nearly enough for Shauna.
She took a step closer to Jackie. “I never wanted your fucking boyfriend Jackie” she says coldly as she shoulder checks her and walks back down the ladder. Jackie feels alone once again. Similar to how she felt when she was outside the cabin that night. Alone. Cold. Scared.
Jackie couldn’t comprehend why Shauna did this. She loved Shauna so much, with her entire being. Loving Shauna came so easily for Jackie, but why was it so hard for Shauna? She hated Jackie but Jackie couldn’t quite put her finger on why. Why would Shauna do all of this, just for her to not even want Jeff in the first place? Jackie’s mind raced with thoughts after thoughts of Shauna and Jeff. How it felt, did he make her cum? Did she like it? She wanted to know everything yet nothing at the same time. She wanted to know if kissing Jeff and being touched by him was the same as being touched by Jackie.
Once shauna walked downstairs, Nat watched her walk out the cabin door headed towards the meat shed. Shauna would go there to calm her anger or escape from this fucked up reality. Natalie followed her, slowly creeping into the meat shed.
“Hey..” she says, Shauna looks up, her brows furrowed in anger.
“What do you want Natalie?” she says with venom in her voice.
“Woah, I was on my way out so I figured I’d check on you. I heard you and Jackie arguing.” She says before swinging the heavy gun back over her shoulder. Shauna stays quiet, looking at Natalie then back down.
“Did you….did you fuck Jeff to be closer to Jackie?” Natalie finally says after biting her tongue. Shauna’s face heats up, she feels a mixture of emotions. Embarrassment, anger, guilt, horny?
“What the fuck Natalie? Why would you even think that?” Shauna says angrily, her fists clenched and she stands to get closer to Natalie.
“Calm down Shauna, I’ve been there. That’s why I thought but sorry I didn’t realize you actually wanted him.” Natalie says, raising her hands up before turning around to walk away.
“Nat- sorry. I didn’t actually want Jeff, I just…I don’t know. I felt like it wasn’t fair” Shauna starts to say before going quiet. She looks down at the ground before back up at nat.
“What wasn’t fair Shauna?” Natalie asks, raising an eyebrow.
“That he got to have her like that…wrapped around his finger. She was openly you know…with him.” Shauna says. She immediately regrets saying anything knowing she should’ve just stayed quiet.
“Oh…I see” Natalie says before walking over to Shauna and sitting down next to her. “Why don’t you just explain that to Jackie?” She adds before Shauna cuts her off. “I can’t- I don’t even know what’s going on in my own head. How would I explain this? ‘Hey Jackie sorry for fucking your boyfriend. I just really wanted to be the one who you looked at in that way, so I felt like fucking him would still give me that small, vulnerable piece of you that I’ve craved since you already gave me some crumbs over the course of our friendship-‘ I can’t. She wouldn’t understand.” Shauna says before pressing her lips in a thin line and turning to face Natalie.
Natalie takes in the moment. Shauna was never one to talk about her feelings. Let alone something with Jackie fucking Taylor involved. “Okay but you do realize you have feelings for her, right?” Natalie says.
Shauna feels sick, to actually admit she wants to touch her beautiful, innocent, sweetheart best friend in a way that would have her shaking. Shauna is too messed up for Jackie. Sure there are some things about Jackie that Shauna can’t help but feel extremely irritated with. But she knows she should have communicated these feelings instead of letting them build up. Maybe she should’ve but that isn’t who Shauna is. She keeps things built up inside until she explodes. She’s hateful, angry, jealous and insecure. But she could change that if she just tried.
“Yeah. I know, but she hates me now and there isn’t anything I can do about that. Plus why would she want me when I’m carrying her boyfriend's baby?” Shauna says, chuckling before looking down at her growing stomach.
Natalie says quiet just staying in Shauna’s presence. Normally she’d pull out a joint but due to the insane circumstances, sobriety was the best option.
“Maybe you can talk to her eventually? Give her space but still do small things to let her know you’re here for when she’s ready.” Natalie suggests. Shauna turns her attention to the blonde. “Woww look at that, Natalie giving me girl advice” she chuckles, nat punches her playfully. “Shut up loser, I had to tuck away my pride for Lottie and here I am. Now we’re in some sort of relationship? I think? But the wilderness has been her main focus lately.” Natalie says before looking down. The two sat in silence before eventually Nat went to hunt, and Shauna carved some meat up to bring inside.
————
Shauna was left to think about her feelings for Jackie. When did they start? She tried to look back at their friendship, all the memories, sleepovers, parties, fights, kissing, touching, everything was all too much. She felt overwhelmed yet it wasn’t nearly enough to satisfy her or this deep desire for her best friend.
November 13th 1966,
I’ve been trying to look back at my friendship with Jackie and figure out when I may have first liked her. I think it was when we were going into 7th grade.
She asked me if I wanted to go for a walk, it was one of our normal sleepovers. We were making bracelets on Jackie’s floor. Both silent but enjoying the company of one another. That is until Jackie looks outside. It was 8:35pm on an August night. It was warm and the sun had just set. Jackie lives not too far from a lake we’d always go to swim in. “Let’s go for a walk,” Jackie suggests. I agree of course, she takes my head and we head outside. Sneaking down the stairs so her parents wouldn’t hear us, of course. Once outside she held my hand all the way there. We’d chuckle and make jokes along the way. Holding each other close. I felt tingly inside, like my stomach was burning but a good burn. She brought us to the lake. “Do you want to swim?” She asks, a big smile spreads across her face. Jackie loved doing spontaneous things, which is something I’ve always adored about her, yet hated. “I didn’t bring a bathing suit” I’d say, itching my arm awkwardly, then looking around. “Neither did I silly, just take off your clothes” she suggests as she starts taking off her own tank top. She slips out of her shorts leaving her in a light blue, matching set. I don’t have much of a choice so I slip out of my clothing, leaving me in my black bra and dark green panties.
“Cmon shipman!” She says grabbing my hand and running towards the water with me. We squeal as the lukewarm water hits our warm skin. We swam for hours just joking and talking. I watched the way her nipples got hard through the material of her bra. I licked my lips
But always looked away before I was caught staring. At least I hoped I was.
From that point on I knew Jackie meant so much more than a friend to me. She was my everything. And once Jeff came along I knew he was going to take those vulnerable parts of Jackie away from me. Soon our special moments became his and hers. It made my stomach churn.
“Shauna dinner!” Someone shouted as she climbed down the ladder. It was getting hard to do so since her belly was growing. Food was becoming more sparse and the tension in the air was thick. The girls ate in silence; near the end of dinner Shauna walked up to Lottie. “I’m coming to sleep back down here. It’s hard for me to walk up and down the stairs” Shauna says shamefully before Lottie places her hands on Shauna’s stomach. “Anything for o- the child” Lottie says, correcting herself quickly before smiling and walking away. Although uneasy, Tai helped Shauna bring her belongings downstairs. She held them as she looked around for an empty space to sleep. She spots the empty space next to Jackie- where Shauna had once slept. Jackie looks away, Shauna remembers what Natalie said. ‘Give her space but do small things to let her know when she’s ready, you’re here’ Shauna continued to glance around the cabin living room.
A spot next to a blonde girl with blue eyes didn’t seem too bad. It was Melissa, she had just moved up from JV. Shauna walked over to the girl. “Is this spot taken?” She asks. Melissa shakes her head moving her stuff to the side, so Shauna could have the other half of the blanket Melissa slept on. Shauna studying her slightly as she placed her pillow and blankets down.
Melissa was cute. Her blonde hair was bright, and her eyes a deep blue. She was more muscular than Jackie, masculine presenting. She always had a pink or white hat on her head. Shauna found it appealing. She figured she might as well explore her options while she’s out here, especially with the new realization that she doesn’t just like guys.
Melissa pov
Melissa had always stared a little too hard at Shauna- during games, after practice, in the locker room, in the hallway. Pretty much whenever Melissa saw Shauna, she couldn’t take her eyes off her. She studied the girl. Shauna was so intriguing, the way she’d put on a small smile to please her best friend but when not in Jackie’s field of vision- she was miserable.
Since the crash, she was a lot closer to Shauna than she had ever been. I mean of course in soccer they got close but not this close. They were basically all living together, a bunch of teenage girls. With that being said, eventually fights broke out. Small ones then the big one; Jackie and Shauna.
“Shauna was fucking Jeff the whole time. That’s who’s really responsible for her ‘bundle of joy’” Jackie says scoffing before looking to see everyone’s reaction. Nobody really moved or said much, even as the two continued to argue.
“I can’t even look at you right now,” Jackie says disgustedly before crossing her arms.
“Well that sounds like your problem, so maybe you should leave.” Shauna says in response. Jackie feels betrayed. Melissa watches the entire thing unfold. Her body language, the way Jackie’s eyes are wide- wider than usual per say. Melissa glances over at Shauna, who stood her ground. Her arms stay by her sides, fists clenched. She finally stood up for herself- of course she wasn’t exactly in the right and Melissa knew that, anyone with EYES would see that. But truly she found it so attractive. Melissa couldn’t deny the wetness between her thighs when Shauna got closer to Jackie telling her she was ‘insecure.’ Melissa wanted to moan out.
And that was mainly when Melissa knew she had to shoot her shot with Shauna at some point out here. No other than after this argument, the two girls were no longer speaking and with Shauna’s pregnancy progressing, she’d need somewhere to sleep downstairs. And of course Melissa just so happened to have an extra space right beside her. Shauna agreed which resulted in her studying Melissa for at least 10 minutes before laying down beside the blonde. As the two laid beside each other; Jackie laid nearby watching, never moving her eyes from the two. Every twitch in their sleep, every sound, any touching Jackie would’ve seen.
30 minutes go by, it starts to get colder. Melissa can feel the hair on her arms sticking up. The mediocre comforter was just not doing it. Obviously it was for Shauna either because she started to back up closer towards Melissa.Her ass starts to press against the girl's lower stomach. Melissa feels heat all throughout her. Burning in her stomach, her head and between her thighs. Her head felt fuzzy, as Shauna moved, settling into a comfortable position. She laid with her ass against Melissa’s groin. Melissa could feel Jackie’s glares from across the room.
Melissa didn’t even know if Shauna was gay- she assumed only because of how weirdly close she and Jackie were. But maybe that’s just an assumption. But the way she was grinding her ass against Melissa was crazy. Not like she would do anything- Shauna is pregnant and all. But as soon as the pregnancy is over? Hell yeah.
——
Eventually the food was running really, really low. To the point where the girls started hallucinating.
“they’re all dead!!!” Mari shouted pointed at the walls, blood dripping down them. A few girls grab Mari attempting to console her, meanwhile Van stares at the wall before saying grimly, “It’s just the hunger Mari.”
They knew they were out of options, the wilderness had chosen other things before, could it not choose who could…save them?
Lottie had an idea, she knew she had to act fast in order to save the baby. A hunt was going to happen. “Whoever draws the Queen” Lottie explained the rules- the other girls nod agreeing. Of course this was necessary, if not how would the baby survive? Shauna was exempt, obviously, but everyone else was to participate. That is when Natalie draws the card. Lottie’s stomach sinks, she feels sick but knows this is what the wilderness must want? No. This can’t be. As the hunt begins, Shauna walks up to her, placing Jackie’s necklace around her neck before pressing the knife to her throat. Natalie trembling under Shauna cold fingers. She tries to pull down her hat over her eyes but Nat stops her.
Through sobs she choke outs “If you’re going to kill me you have to look at me” Shauna tearfully keeps the hat up. Pressing the knife to Natalie’s throat. For the first time, Lottie flinches. Only feeling helpless to the girl she loves about to die and become their dinner. That is until Travis pushes Shauna.
“Natalie run!!!” He yells as the girls tackle him and grab Shauna from the ground. Jackie is the one who checks on Shauna immediately, unable to help herself.
Meanwhile Natalie sprints out of the cabin. Javi follows close behind her after Travis gestured for him to. He follows close behind her until he finally gets her alone. She hears the girls howling in the distance. Her throat is dry and javi stands in front of her.
“Natalie! You can trust me, just come with me” Nat has to quickly decide. She decides to trust him since her brother had just basically sacrificed himself for her by pushing a pregnant girl. Javis leads her to the lake.
“It’s just across the lake,” he says, quickly sprinting. Natalie follows close by as the girls find the two and are chasing after them over the ice. Javi soon steps on a weak patch of ice and falls through.
“JAVI!!!” Natalie screams and runs towards him.
“Spread out!!” The hunters say as they spread out to avoid cracking more ice. “Natalie!! Natalie stop it” Misty says running towards Natalie pulling her away from the drowning boy.
“…n..natabliie” Javi tries to say as he drowns. All the girls stand around the boy watching him- watching their hunger disappear.
“If you save him, it’s you” Misty says, Natalie slumps down in Misty’s arms sobbing as the boy finally takes his last breath.
“Grab him” someone says as Misty and a few other girls run over to pull the boy out of the water.
They all walk back to the cabin where Travis stands waiting for Natalie.
“Natalie” he says tearfully, trying to touch her face before she cries and walks away from his grasp. Behind her are the girls holding javis who is tied to a branch they’re carrying. “It all happened so fast. The wilderness chose.” Natalie says to Travis as he sits outside with the boy's body. After time Shauna is to carve him up. Travis eats his hearts and the rest of the girls eat bits and pieces.
————
As weeks went on Shauna’s due date was coming closer and closer, the girls didn’t have an exact prediction but Lottie had assumed it was within the next 3-6 weeks. Shauna continued to sleep next to Melissa, who she grinded her ass against every night. She assumed Melissa just thought she was asleep but she was most definitely not. She just needed that closeness, and Melissa allowed it. Jackie and Shauna hadn’t really spoken much. Just the occasional ‘catching one another staring then neither of us look away for a good 10 minutes before one of us gives a small smile and looks down’ yet we refuse to talk?
Shauna believed it was Jackie’s way of saying ‘we’re civil but I’m not ready to forgive or talk to you yet’ which Shauna found easy to respect considering she was never the type to give in first- or easily. But the staring and small smile was enough to satisfy Shauna, for now. Except, her due date coming up was fucking terrifying. All she wanted was for Jackie to be by her side. But she knew she might have to just have Tai and Nat. Which she was okay with but definitely not what she wanted. What she wants is Jackie, and it’ll always be Jackie.
December 13th 1966,
Shauna walked back in from the meat shed, carving whatever she was able to from javis mostly skeleton now. She walks inside revealing tai sitting down with Lottie and her weird fucking cult shit. Shauna was fuming. She had been really short tempered recently- more so than usual. The past couple weeks Shauna and Tai had gotten closer, obviously since the plane crash they had bonded.
Tai realizes Shauna is back and watches her scoff and roll her eyes.
She stands up headed towards the girl, before she places the barley scraps down and going back outside. She slams the door before tai follows her out. “Shauna what the fuck?” She says following her into the woods, shuffling her feet through the snow. “Tai, you're supposed to be MY friend. But now you’re with Lottie supporting her. She’s obsessed with my baby tai!” Shauna says desperately. “Well we’re all excited for the baby Shauna-“ tai tries to say before Shauna cuts her off. “If anything I should be excited to be having my baby! But I’m not, I’m completely fucking freaking out because I’m having a baby in the middle of the forest and the obgyn on call is Misty fucking quigley” Shauna says tearfully. “Okay well for the first time I’m not scared to fall asleep Shauna!” Tai says before Shauna screams out in pain grabbing her stomach. “ahhh fuck!!” She groans out, the wind swirls around them. The snow falling harder and the wind hitting their face. The two head back towards the cabin- or at least the way tai thinks is the cabin.
“Ahhhh tai” Shauna says, the snow hitting her face and her contractions now less than five minutes apart. “We hear the wildness and it hears us” Tai whispers as the girls trail through the storm back to Cabin.
Meanwhile back at the cabin, the girl headed outside realizing how bad the storm truly was. Jackie’s heart sank. Even though she was upset at Shauna for grinding up against Melissa for the past couple weeks, she still didn’t want her to die out in a fucking blizzard. She and the other girls, mainly Lottie, began chanting we hear the wilderness and it hears us. All until they were able to hear their friends' voices and make it back- somehow. Lottie’s voodoo shit always worked, Jackie wouldn’t dare to admit it but sometimes she was right.
As Tai and Shauna walked up to them, Shauna was hunched over. She held her stomach as the two walked inside slamming the door behind the two girls.
“Is she…?” Someone asks before Shauna screams out in pain.