Chapter Text
Honesty isn’t always yor strongsuit; I’d assume, but the hope of not interacting with this annoying excuse for a human being is both valid and honest. You rise from his bed, while his questoning gaze lingers on you. Inside your thoughts, lies the wish of Shrek understanding your akward exit to perhaps collect your thoughts after whatever clusterfuck that conversation was.
Every step feels like you’re carrying tons of weight, who thought a small comment on the grammar mistakes and immaturity you have could affect the human being (or alien I don’t know) you are. This experience could absolutely help you learn on improving your relationship with the -oh so majestic Shrek, but dancing around it seems altogether so much easier even if it pains everyone involved. Since you have your phone, maybe explaining why you left to Shrek would amount to some good.
”soz for leavinb ya i nerded to thhonk :((( <3”.
Apologizing is totally gonna take a while for you to wind up to the conclusion, but atleast you have regret. Speaking of regret, maybe analyze your past with Vriska- wiat no… Yes? God, I don’t want to dance around the thoughts, even if they are painful.
hold on is that LORD FARQUAD??!?!?!?
”hi tit i lord farquase” he smirks cufuteluy…….
”oi BACK OFF MY GIRL Mate..!” shrEk growkls deeply…. then he does the mating fuckwhoknows dance protectoong thing do you think i know what ogres do????
”alright since you want an immense rap battle then here is one! !!!”. You stand between them waiting for the battle to commence.
Buh buh buh buh buh buh buh buh intro
”Yo my name is Lord Farquad, I hate ogres, they smell like the bottom of the bathtub after pissing with chokers, I’m not snot” badum break short Llalal
”Shrexy has become too pec-si, I’m gonna pound you like I did with your mother with a sound” You blöusushshshhshshshhshss!!! at hearing Shrek, gog, isn’t he wonderful?
”Anyways im gonna pound with these fists, poor FARTQUARD” then lord farquad passes out i forgot if i spelt his name wrong.
”Tyat was a grahsssve misstake mihsssster Schrek”, says the ominous voice.