Chapter Text
Keith and Shiro set up the plates for breakfast, and the rest of the gang eventually came to eat.
Lance still contributed to the lively conversation, but he was a bit more subdued than usual. Of course, he would get back to hyperactive never-quiet Lance mode soon enough, but the wound was still a little too fresh to get over. The blue paladin legitimately wondered if the healing pods could work on emotions, before shooing the thought away.
Hunk and Pidge were happily chatting away at first glance, but Lance noticed that they were a little too happy. As if it were an exaggerated emotion, trying to cover up for something else—
They feel bad for me. Lance realized. They feel bad because I was practically just rejected by Keith.
He stopped poking at his breakfast potatoes, which looked more like baby food that had been regurgitated periodically, and felt a rock drop in his stomach. Keith never actually verbally rejected him.
Lance had said he was over it, but he lacked something. He wanted closure, he wanted something more than the vague emptiness that he was drowning in at the moment. First, the want started out as a mere itch. It was there, it was annoying, but it was bearable; he could ignore it if he focused on other things hard enough. Like his mushy breakfast. But then the itch grew into a rash, making his stomach curl with dissatisfaction and apprehension.
So, after breakfast, he pulled Keith to the side, grabbing him by the arm almost conspiratorially, and pulled him towards the East Wing.
“What do you want?” Keith asked, on the defensive. Lance didn’t blame him; the last time Lance had pulled Keith aside, he had told Keith that he had a baby galra trapped in his room, and that it was actually really cute and that he needed help secretly raising it. When Keith had walked into Lance’s room, Hunk had sprung up and warbled aggressively, causing Keith to have a heart attack.
Yeah. Well, putting that aside, Keith had no other reason to be so guarded. In fact, it was Lance who was kind of getting self-conscious at this point, but he forced himself to push on.
“I… can we talk?” Lance said all in one long breath, barely managing to make eye contact with the red paladin. Heat rose to his cheeks, and he didn’t know if he could actually make it through this conversation without imploding.
Keith blinked, not expecting an answer so sincere. “Uh, sure. Where?”
“In my room. Or actually,” Lance quickly remediated his response when he saw Keith’s eyes narrow, the other teen obviously thinking of the baby galra incident, “We can do your room.”
“Okay.”
The two walked to Keith’s room in silence, and the blue paladin glanced behind him to see if anyone noticed where the two were going. He caught Shiro’s eyes for a moment, before the older man turned around. Somehow, Lance felt like he was being pitied inadvertently.
When the two got to Keith’s room, Lance closed the door behind them. Keith sat down on the bed and sprawled out comfortably, glancing at Lance, who was still standing rather stiffly.
“What’s up, man?”
Lance opened his mouth, then closed it, not unlike a goldfish. And then he did it again.
Mira, Lance, mira en sus ojos. Look him in the eyes.
The latino teen closed his eyes, and let go of a deep breath. The calming exercise didn’t go unnoticed by Keith, but thankfully, he didn’t comment on it. Lance opened his eyes to look at Keith with a slightly renewed sense of confidence.
“I love you.”
Keith stared at Lance, as if he were the one with the century-old haircut. It was his turn to gape like a goldfish, and Lance almost didn’t want to admit it, but it was cute. Probably cuter than a baby galra.
The black-haired paladin finally found his voice, and said, “Lance, I’m really flattered, but there’s someone el—”
Lance whipped his hand in front of Keith, as if to say stop right there, and blustered almost desperately, “You don’t have to say anything! I mean, that’s not what I came here to say. I didn’t come to confess or anything.” That part just kinda slipped out on its own.
Keith scrutinized Lance, the wary stance back again. The blue paladin could tell that Keith was just itching to say, oh, that’s not it? There’s more? but instead, Keith just said, “What did you come here to say then?”
“I came here to say thank you.”
When Lance was greeted with silence, he frantically tried to explain, “I mean, thanks for like… being there.”
Keith just stared silently at Lance once more. Lance sighed and took a seat next to Keith, turning towards the other teen.
Leg bouncing rapidly as he spoke, Lance explained, “I’ve lived my entire life thinking that I was going to fall in love with a girl, that I’d make some witty joke, she’d laugh, and everything would just be smooth sailing from there. I didn’t expect to meet you and your stupid, adorable mullet.”
Lance blushed just saying it outloud, half-hoping to be sucked up into a black hole in the middle of this God-awful, obnoxiously one-sided conversation. “But I did. You made me laugh when I missed my family, you made me feel special when I felt like a single insignificant star in the galaxy, and most importantly, you made me feel at home when I missed home. You’re… you’re a really great friend, Keith.”
Lance started wringing his hands anxiously, trying to gauge Keith’s reaction as he spoke, but he couldn’t determine anything. So, he did the only thing he could think to do: continue.
“And then, I wanted to be more than friends. I wanted to be the guy who hugged you when you felt down, the guy who made you laugh when you needed it most… I basically just wanted to be the ‘Vol’ to your ‘tron’,” Lance chuckled weakly.
“But it didn’t work out. It’s okay, though, because I know a little bit more about myself now. Who knew I could fall so hard for a guy, anyways, right? Especially a hot-headed jackass like you,” Lance tried at playful jabs, but the crack in his voice probably broke the illusion of camaraderie.
Keith didn’t respond immediately, and Lance almost didn’t expect him to, which is why he was surprised when he felt a hand on his. The blue paladin looked up to Keith, who looked back at him with an equally sensitive, almost pained gaze— not unlike the way he looked at Lance when he got shot by a Galra laser.
Lance never wanted to make Keith look at him that way again.
“Thanks for telling me, Lance. I… I really don’t know how to respond.”
Lance grinned. “You don’t have to respond, dude. I know you have your very own ‘Vol’ to your ‘tron’ these days anyway.”
“How did you… you know what, nevermind. Nothing ever gets past those eyes, huh?” Keith smiled tentatively, trying to break the tense aura that surrounded them at that moment.
Lance snorted and got up off the bed, running a hand through his hair before setting both of them on his hips. He turned around to look down at Keith once more. Keith, with his soft black stupid hair, and his plush pink lips, his arrogant face, and his brave soul. Keith, who belonged to someone else.
Keith, who would never love him the way that Lance did.
And Lance was finally, finally fine with that.
“You helped me discover myself, and for that, I owe you.” Lance held out his hand to Keith, who took it firmly, without hesitation. Lance pulled Keith up to his feet, and planted a hand on Keith’s shoulder.
“To an eternity of adventures with Voltron?” Lance held up his other hand for a fistbump.
Keith grinned back at Lance. “Hell yeah.”
The two left the room to join the rest of the gang, and Lance couldn’t help but sneak another glance at Keith. He smiled.
“I won’t ever forget you, Keith. My first love, huh? Thank you.”