Chapter Text
Caldon awoke with a gasp. He was surrounded by darkness and immediately tried to summon a flame, only to be entirely drenched by a spray of freezing water that smelled and tasted of sea salt. The wooden floor he lay on was rocking and creaking beneath him and he stared towards the raging, angry skies that had rocked his whole world over four years ago.
And there were no skies, only a vast emptiness as he was washed away by a tidal wave and pulled deep down into the ice-cold depths of the ocean by its greedy claw-tipped waves, just as his parents had been.
His father had once been able to lift both Caldon and his Ashlynn upon his strong and broad shoulders at the same time. He bellowed silly songs as they made their way through the city centre of Vallenia. He did so even in public as if he wasn’t one of the highest ranking commanders of their kingdom’s armada. His mother, the most fierce general Vallenia had ever seen, laughed and clapped joyfully when he had learned to control his fire. She had hugged him tightly, calling him her fierce dragon and when the next festival of autumn had arrived, they combined their affinities for fire to manifest a blazing dragon and raised their hands together to streak it across the dark blue skies.
He had expected to have been the one to take over, to lead the armies in their stead once they had retired. And he had wanted it, he had wanted to serve his kingdom so badly at a time that he had even gained the scars to prove it.
But they had departed then into the Everworld far too soon, far too soon for his heart to bear.
His world once full of wonder was replaced by one of self-loathing and fear that all else good would be wrenched from him, both of which hidden beneath a flair for the dramatics and a shallowness that made not even a dent in the sea.
—
Cold… so cold…
Rain splattered uncomfortably against his skin, the soil beneath him beginning to meld into mud and the coldness continued to seep into his flesh.
—
They could have frozen to death, died from exhaustion, or maybe… maybe they drowned under the crushing frigid water after being struck wave after wave after wave after wave…
…Aunt Ariana had nearly drowned him once with her magic but it had only been for a mere thirty seconds before Jaren intervened and saved him. Had his parents suffered like that for longer?
No! He didn’t want to know! He didn't! The sensation had been so awful even though he’d been saved by Jaren and they had both lied to the healer from Silverthorn, telling him that he had fallen into the lake.
Because it hadn't been her fault. Of course it hadn’t. She had just lost her sister. He had lost his parents. She didn’t remember, it was the Angeldust’s fault. She had taken it. She had purposefully taken it. It was the addiction's fault… she had been trying to stop. But had she really been?
Jaren told him that she had been lying about receiving treatment and stopping for years.
Yet it was Aunt Ariana and Uncle Stellan who had held him and Ashlynn close in the depths of their despair. They had treated the both of them as their own children, being as loving and as kind and as patient and…
Uncle Stellan was dead.
His sickness, having been a hungry devourer of his inner flesh and organs.
How much pain had that man hidden from the rest of them? How much of his condition had he shielded the world from? A world that would never even know how much he had suffered. The Everworld was greedy. It snatched away all of this cruel world’s goodness.
—
Cold… so cold…
Thunder rolled. The ground shook. Caldon startled awake for a fraction of a second. He could do nothing but shiver though as he slipped back into his slumber within moments, trapped in his fevered state. Even the forming the thought of seeking shelter was beyond his capacities
Another thunderclap.
—
When would death claim him?
When could he see them again?
He was already numb and dying.
He didn’t want to feel anyways. He just wanted to be. Or maybe he didn’t want to be? He didn’t know…
He was just waiting, wishing, dreaming, and floating between the Earth and the Everworld.
So why was it so hard for death to claim him?
He was already lying in his grave. He could barely feel his own heartbeat. His fire was gone. Tipp was gone. His cousins and aunt and sisters were in more danger than ever before, yet he had no fight left in him. He had failed them. He had lost. The world as he had once loved was destined to be entirely destroyed. Perhaps it already was.
He was as easy a target as death was ever going to get.
“Get on with it.” He whispered, holding out his cupped hands and yielding to the shadows of men and women that circled him as he now found himself kneeling on the rocking ship’s wood in this ethereal abyss of emptiness that was now speckled with distant stars. “This is what you wanted, wasn’t it?”
The shadows paused in their motions and reached towards him and he smiled widely.
Yes!
They were ready for him. They were finally ready for him.
But before he could reach their fingertips with his own hands now outstretched, the memories, all the good and the bad and the worse returned with an intensity tenfold, leaving him shaking and sobbing.
“Please… no more.” He begged for the memories of his life to stop as he stared ahead blindly, “Please! I loved my family… I loved my family so much but you have already taken them from me and now you want to take me away too, so why don’t you?! What are you waiting for? Why won’t you?”
“Because you are my brave and fierce dragon, Caldon.” A long lost voice finally chimed in through the silence and Caldon’s eyes welled with tears at its ever so familiar warmth which radiated so much love as Aisling Vallentis stepped into view, red gold gaze beaming with joy. The soft orange glow she cast as her golden hair swayed, expelling the shadows and ceasing the boat’s rocking at once with her steadfast presence.
“Mama!” He cried and she immediately knelt down in front of him and engulfed him in a hug that set his world right again. There was no more coldness or numbness. There was light and love again. He could move and feel. He could hug her back. He could cry into her shoulder and cry he did.
“Because you have a strong heart, my precious boy.” She continued as he sobbed in her arms, no more weightlessness or heaviness in his heart, everything was exactly as it should have been. “Because you choose kindness and forgiveness over anger and vengeance over and over. Because you give love without conditions.”
He pulled away, only after an eternity, and made an effort to look at her, despite his vision being blurred by his own glowing orange tears. She cupped his face in her hands.
“Because you’ve made me and Papa so proud.” She said, red gold eyes glistening.
“But I failed to protect Tipp and the others, we’ve been betrayed and I didn’t see it coming. I should have seen it coming.” He whispered in disdain. “What if we have already lost it all?”
“And what if we haven’t?” She smiled as she pushed a strand away from his face and the stars grew a little brighter around them, even as he shook his head.
“When I lost you and Papa, I lost Ashlynn for four years because I was weak and I pushed her away. What if I hurt someone again?”
“What if you won’t hurt someone again? You’ve come so far, Caldon. You’ve grown so much. Trust in yourself, my child.”
He smiled at her sadly, “But I’m dying, Mama.”
“And what if you’re not?
He laughed wholeheartedly when he recognized the glint of mischief in her eyes now, her words having been playful as she fought his doubts for him. She was as she had always been.
“There is no cure for Necros Adder venom. Don’t tell me that there is.”
“Isn’t there?” She laughed anyway and he looked at her wonderingly, feeling his mind grow stronger as the stars which had grown brighter and brighter began to spin around them.
“How is this possible?” He asked, wide eyed. “How am I speaking with you, Mama?”
Her silhouette began to shine an even brighter golden red, the same as her eyes. She stood up and raised him, taking his hands in hers and then he began to glow as well. His fire was back, he could feel it buzzing in his skin and he felt even warmer.
“Memories hold magic, memories fuel magic. Don’t you remember, my fierce dragon? Your cousin Jaren knows this well.”
“I remember.” He realized and he envisioned their dragon streaking the sky all those years ago, the flames in his hands glowing brighter.
“And those memories breathe life to our magic, they keep the powers of Sarana Vallentis alive. They keep us alive.” She placed a kiss on his forehead and whispered, “I am with you always, Caldon. Even if you cannot perceive it.”
“You’re not taking me with you.” He understood when he felt her hands leave his, but he didn’t feel any disappointment, just simple acceptance. She gave him a nod as her light became like a reflection in water, rippling away. “Reignite your blaze and do not let it die out, Caldon. And tell my Ashlynn that she need not fear finding love and being revered from an unexpected place, as long as it is whole, firm, and true.”
“I will.” He promised. “I love you, Mama.” Caldon said softly even though only the faintest outline of her silhouette remained. “Could… could you tell Papa that I love him too?”
“I will.” She promised and with that, she faded back into the Everworld whose stars now blazed so brightly that they blinded Caldon entirely with their undying light and he was forced to close his eyes.
“I love you, son.”
—
His fire had reignited and the coldness that had been sinking its fangs into his bones disappeared as his magic burned through him.
—
When his eyes had opened and his vision slowly began to readjust, he saw his mother’s face tearfully looking down at him once more with a trembling smile and for a moment he feared that she had changed her mind, that she had taken him back with her just when he had finally realized that he still had so much more left to do. So much more left to love and protect. He couldn’t leave just yet. He couldn't just leave them!
“ No… ” He choked out in disdain as the traces of the pain from before began to flare up in every inch of his burning body once more. “ Nonono! I can’t be dead after all that! That’s not allowed, mother!”
“Of course, you can’t be dead Cal! You just can’t!” She shrilly half cried and half laughed, causing him to realize that he was being held in her arms as she began to rattle him. “Cause you’re my stupid, pathetic, and idiotic baby brother who blew the one job he had and I just hate you so bloody damn much right now!” A kiss was pressed to his forehead as he was pulled into what felt like a hug.
“Ashy…?” His mind finally processed that her eyes were earth-leaf green and then he burst into a hysterical fit of laughter alongside his still sobbing older sister, not even knowing why he was laughing when every part of him felt set on fire. “Ashy! You’re-”
The words were knocked out by his own scream of pain when a blurry red spindly thing struck him as fast as lightning, wrapping itself around him so tightly, Caldon could have sworn that one of his ribs might have cracked.
“Caldon!” It shrieked and despite his mind being extremely muddled with confusion and nonsensical thoughts, he realized that it was not an it. He was a Tipp.
Tipp!
“You’re not d-dead!” Tipp shouted so loudly that Caldon’s ears began to ring and he slumped against his sister, relieved tears filling his eyes when his vision stopped spinning for one single moment. “Neither are you kiddo… nei ther are y- ”
“Caldon?! Oh no… he’s unconscious again!”
“H- he’s feverish… very feverish!”
“We’ve got to get him to Silverthorn. Help us get him into the carriage."
“General, what about the hearse?”
“DOES IT LOOK LIKE WE NEED A DAMN HEARSE RIGHT NOW?!”
“Sorry, general.”
Ugh, why was it so uncomfortably warm now?
“A- Ashy?” Caldon croaked, remembering that he had to tell her something but frowning when realized he was no longer outside and appeared to be lying down in a moving carriage. How odd, all he had done was blink and now someone was combing through his hair in a soothing, motherly fashion but he knew that it wasn’t his mother for a voice was softly singing. It was Aunt Ariana’s old lullaby for Oriel. “Ashlynn, dearest. I think he’s waking again.” He heard her say in a hushed tone.
“Hey, Cal.” She said from somewhere he couldn't see, sounding weary. “You doing a bit better, now? We’re nearly at Silverthorn.”
“Who are you yelling at?” He asked, not able to make much sense of what she had just said.
“Nobody?” She sounded confused.
“I heard you… ” He replied accusatively but this time he felt his words slurring and so before he lost consciousness once more, he quickly blurted out what their mother wanted him to tell her. “Mama wants you to tell Torrel you love him!”
He heard her gasp and Tipp laugh, even as he felt the pull of sleep begin to drag him down once more.
“What the hell, Caldon?!”