Chapter Text
dazai spends the next few hours looking at chuuya, idle and mindless. sometimes, he does reply, shortly, never letting himself steal too much time. he hasn't moved since he arrived, and the tide has risen a little. he's sitting at the bottom of the sea, theoretically. if he weren't so focused on something else, that thought would make him smile.
“when do you have to go?”
words quietly asked by chuuya finally snap him out of his daze. “i don't know,” he confesses. “my train is at seven, i think. doesn't matter if i miss it, though.” chuuya nods, unaware that it would matter so, so much if dazai did miss the train. he'd miss his flight, and he'd miss going back to work. oh, how terrible.
still, chuuya's question made him curious. he flicked his phone out of the pocket of his trousers, marvels at the fact it still works despite having been half-soaked for the past gods-know-how-long, and then checks the hour. six hours and twenty-six minutes in the morning, with the moon sinking into the horizon far beyond. dazai stifles a curse.
“everything okay?” chuuya asks, gently, almost stupidly. dazai looks like he could cry at any given moment. so, he just sighs, heavily, and shakes his head. “i'm supposed to leave soon,” he whispers, the sound of the waves almost drowning his voice. keyword here is “supposed”.
chuuya looks down, a light, wistful smile on his face. “tonight felt shorter than the others.” he's much quieter than usual saying this, as if it were a shame. dazai thinks the same, but doesn't say a thing of it. he just looks on, wishing he could make chuuya look up again. make his smile a real one again. he doesn't know how he could.
“at least, the moon was pretty,” he merely whispers. the moon was close to being fully set, with only a thin, silver curve visible above the sea.
“yeah, guess it was.”
something in dazai wanted to apologise, to say, “actually, i don't need to leave”, and just stay by the beach for all the time he had.
“i'm sorry, i…”
no other word leaves dazai's mouth. he's sorry, that's all there is to know. “i think… i should go.” pack the few of stuff he's got, walk back to the train station, and maybe never come back again.
at first, a mere “oh” escapes chuuya. “talk to me often, okay? every day.” it sounds like asking, it feels like begging.
“every day,” dazai replies, with a little smile. he gets up, and dusts away the bits of wet sand that cling to him. the sea doesn't want to let go, for once.
chuuya swims away a little, just a meter or two away, just enough so that dazai feels like he could reach him. he doesn't attempt. it's just enough so that hears him wish,
“good luck on your suicide, you idiot.”
he says it, laughing, and soon that is replaced by a splash, and then, utter silence. chuuya plunged back in. dazai looks at the sky, his smile fading, and he finds himself thinking that the clouds are going to be beautiful today.