Chapter Text
Linda had laughed when he’d told her. Until she realised he wasn’t joking, and that really was his plan.
“Really?”
“Certainly.” He had nodded.
“So you’re inviting me to dinner?”
“I am.”
“But why?”
“Because you’re an important part of my life, and that is what I’m choosing to make this Christmas about.”
“Are you sure, Lucifer?”
“Most definitely, Doctor.”
“So, to clarify, you’re asking me, a Jewish Hollywood psychiatrist to come to Christmas lunch, celebrating your half-brother’s birthday – who you happen to have a huge issue with, naturally – with your girlfriend, her child, her ex-husband, her mom, a demon and an angel who are having intense relationship issues, and a forensic cop?”
“Yes..” Lucifer took a sip of water from his glass.
“I wouldn’t miss that for the world. In fact, I hope it would be the way to go, should the apocalypse happen to hit because of that insane situation alone.”
“I don’t think Father dearest will purge the earth due to my gathering, but he’s done more for less.”
After Lucifer left, Linda sat there for a minute thinking about the situation. And then she laughed until she cried, because she had all of the material for a perfect page-turner of a psych paper, but she could never get it published for fear that they would commit her.
--
Chloe was partially surprised when she stumbled downstairs at ten in the morning to find her Christmas tree swimming in a sea of presents, and Maze groaning about not being able to eat anything while Lucifer worked in the kitchen.
“Patience, Mazikeen.”
“Patience is for people who aren’t bold enough to take what they want.”
“Patience is something you will find, or I will sit you next to Detective Douche.”
“Fine.” Maze growled.
“Good morning. Why are you in my kitchen, cooking?” Chloe asked, and Lucifer smiled.
“Good morning! I’m bringing the party to you.”
“Dan is going to be here in four hours.”
“I have it covered!” Lucifer grinned, cutting up potatoes.
Chloe shrugged and flopped down onto the couch, Trixie bouncing in a minute later.
“Santa bought me a new bear!” she squealed, and Chloe looked at Lucifer as she wrapped Trixie up in a hug.
“Did he now?” Chloe asked.
“Did you open my present?” Maze called.
“You got me a present?” Trixie gasped, and Maze nodded.
“Of course.”
“Can we open presents now, mommy?” Trixie stared up at her with wide eyes, and Chloe nodded.
“We can, monkey.”
“Yay!” Trixie wriggled out of Chloe’s lap and ran over to the tree, hovering.
“Mine is the black wrapping.” Maze told her, delighted as Trixie grabbed it. She tore into it, wrapping paper going everywhere and then holding it up in silence.
“You got me ninja swords?” Trixie asked quietly, and Chloe almost fell off the couch.
“What?!”
“They’re plastic, relax.” Maze said as Trixie took them out of the packaging.
“They’re awesome!!!”
“Open the pink one, Beatrice.” Lucifer called, watching as she took it from under the tree.
“It’s heavy.” Was all Trixie said before she tore into it, a delighted squeal bursting from her mouth as she reached the box.
“Roller skates!”
“Who’s it from, honey?” Chloe asked, shooting a surprised look at Lucifer.
“I believe the tag says ‘From Satan’.” Lucifer called, and Trixie laughed.
“I knew it! Lucifer you’re the best!”
“You need not inform me of what I already know.” He patted her head as she hugged his knees, and Maze scooped her up.
“Can you teach me how to be a ninja, Maze?”
“I sure can.”
“Open my presents now.” Chloe called, watching as Trixie came running back. She tore through the wrapping paper in seconds, her face lighting up as she pulled a new doll out.
“Mommy! She even comes with a mini chocolate cake!”
“I know, isn’t it great?” Chloe asked trying not to laugh as Lucifer coughed loudly from the kitchen.
Trixie tore her way through the rest of her presents, until there were only gifts for Lucifer, Maze and Chloe sitting under the tree.
“Maze.” Chloe handed the box to the demon, smiling as Maze opened it and pulled out the necklace.
“This is pretty good. Thanks.” She toyed with the blade, a smile spreading across her face as she touched the tip with her finger and it bit at her skin.
“Here’s mine.” Maze picked up a small box and handed it to Chloe, who stared down at it in surprise.
“You didn’t have to get me anything.”
“Well if you don’t want it..” Maze shrugged, reaching for it but Chloe moved it away.
“Nope. It’s mine now.” She carefully unwrapped it, entirely unsurprised when she found a bottle of cinnamon whiskey.
“It’s nice. You can have it with lemonade or something if you don’t want it straight.” Maze told her, and Chloe smiled.
“Thank you, Maze.”
“Mine next!” Trixie held up a box, and Chloe grinned as she opened it to find a bottle of her favourite perfume.
“Monkey, it’s great.” She scooped up Trixie, looking pointedly at Lucifer as he shrugged, pretending to look innocent.
“Sap.” Maze snorted.
The last present left under the tree was for Chloe, from Lucifer and she couldn’t help but gasp as she opened it to find her favourite pair of shoes, completely fixed.
“How?!”
“I have exceptional clothing and footwear manufacturing connections.” He smiled as she peeled back the paper underneath to find another pair of brand new shoes that were exactly the same, but like her original pair had been the day she’d found them in the store.
“You’re kidding.”
“Like I said, connections.” Lucifer tapped his nose, smiling as Chloe came into the kitchen and kissed him on the cheek.
“Thank you so much, Lucifer. It’s perfect.”
“My pleasure.”
“I got something for you.”
“Really, Detective?” he asked as she reached under the tree for the present, taking it over to him.
“It’s not you.” He said when she placed the box on the counter, and she laughed.
“It’s not, but you should open it.” She pushed it towards him, watching as he carefully removed the paper.
“A knife set, how lovely. Hold on, what is that on the handle?! I definitely do not look like that!!” Lucifer huffed, and Maze burst into laughter as she pulled the box of knives over to examine the branding.
A cartoon Devil was etched into every knife, next to the words ‘Kitchen Devil’, and Lucifer glared.
“Surely these don’t remind you of me.”
“No, but the minute I saw them I knew I had to get them.”
“I think the likeness is very close.” Maze chuckled, ignoring Lucifer’s death glare.
--
Mama Decker arrived at two, carrying a massive bag full of presents.
“Lucifer!” she opened her arms, kissing him on the cheek as he hugged her.
“Mama Decker, good to see you on good terms this time.”
“I can’t miss Christmas, especially with my two girls!” she wrapped Trixie and Chloe in a hug, handing their presents to them. Dan arrived shortly afterwards with more presents, looking exceptionally awkward as he set eyes on all of the guests so far. And then Linda, Ella and Amenadiel arrived all together, the house soon full of chatter and laughter as Maze started serving drinks – eggnog, mocktails, spirits and wine.
“Happy Christmas!” Ella hugged everyone, Chloe and Amenadiel laughing out loud as Maze froze and looked horrified. She passed around her gifts – small boxes of chocolate – to everyone.
Linda settled on the couch next to Chloe, who had already poured some of her Fireball into a glass with egg nog and was sipping it slowly.
“Hell of a party.” She laughed, and Chloe nodded.
“It sure is. Typical Lucifer.” She smiled, the two of them watching as he chatted to Ella while he cooked.
Small food was brought by Mama Decker, and she arranged bowls of dip, corn chips and cheese as people settled on stools and in couches. Trixie sat on Penelope’s knee while they chattered away, and Ella got into a deep discussion with Amenadiel while Maze used her teeth to open herself another beer, plonking down next to Linda on the couch.
“I never thought this day could be good for anything but getting drunk and having sex.”
“Are you reconsidering that?” Chloe asked, and Maze nodded.
“I am.”
“That’s excellent, Maze.” Linda clinked glasses with her, and Chloe excused herself as she wound through everyone to stand next to Lucifer in the kitchen.
“I can’t believe you organised all of this, and are doing all of the cooking.”
“Well, you already had something organised with Dan, Mama Decker and Trixie. I just took the leisure of expanding the party a little.” He smiled, and Chloe laughed.
“It’s perfect.”
--
Finally, at six, Lucifer called them around the table and they all took their seats, their eyes widening at the amount of food.
There was fish, pies, roast vegetables, a chicken, several salads, two different types of potatoes, and even a soup.
“Lucifer, your cooking skills are off the charts!” Ella gave him thumbs up, and he smirked.
“Thank you. And thank you all for coming to celebrate being together, and having a good time.”
“Agreed. Cheers!” Maze raised her glass, and everyone clinked glasses – even Trixie with her sparkling apple juice.
Chloe slid her hand under the table to grasp Lucifer’s, holding it as she looked at him.
“Thank you so much. For everything.”
“You’re welcome. And thank you too, Detective. Without you, this Christmas would have been rather lonely.”
“I can’t imagine anything better than this.” Chloe squeezed his hand, matching his smile.
“Well, if you’re up for it tonight I can show you how I can make it better.” He winked, laughing as she rolled her eyes and let go of his hand, patting his knee.
“You already got your gift.”
“No chance of a second one? It’s a dual gift, and I can give you more than one.” Lucifer smirked.
“Maybe next Christmas.” She winked.
“Next Christmas? That’s a whole year of waiting!”
“Patience.” Chloe mocked in a similar tone to his from this morning as he glared, digging into the food.