Chapter Text
Alex stood in the room with Bogo, Denzelle having been sent to do paperwork. The chief had deemed her presence in the bullpen unnecessary, as she had done nothing wrong. Alex was there to serve as a calmer voice between Bogo and Hoggbottom, who were absolutely livid at the damage that Judy and Nick had wreaked on the city during their pursuit of Snootley. “Bunny! Orange dog! In here NOW!” Bogo screamed at the fox and rabbit.
The other duos of officers stood behind Nick and Judy as they stood in front of Bogo’s desk. Bloats and Higgins looked rather upset as several porcupine quills were still sticking out of their bodies. “Sir, today may not have been ideal but the anteater was captured…” Judy started to say.
“BY THE ZEBROS!” Bogo snapped.
“ZEBROS!” Zebrowski and Zebraxton cheered together.
“SHUT IT!” Alex and Bogo roared in unison at the equines.
“Zebros.” The zebra and horse painted up like a zebra whispered in unison.
“It was us, but more importantly, I believe we may have made a significant discovery: the stolen van contained a smuggled crate from overseas, pamphlets for the Zootenial and some type of reptile skin, I’ve already sent samples for testing and…” Judy tried to continue, not noticing Alex crossing his arms in an ‘X’ and shaking his head at her slowly.
“What needs testing is you! You two tore up half the city! Because of you we had to call in the Jumbo Unit to remove a Dik Dik from a tuba!” Bogo pointed out, incensed by Judy’s ignorance.
Nick smirked as he reached into his pocket. “Sorry, could you show me that clip again? I wasn't wearing my glasses.” Nick chuckled as he pulled out fake sunglasses and put them on.
“Wilde and Hopps. Did you or did you not disobey a direct order to stand down?” Bogo growled.
“Sir, we were in pursuit and article six, paragraph B states if the lead officers…” Judy began a counter argument.
Alex furiously started making the chopping head off motion and shaking his head, desperately trying to convey that she needed to stop talking and shut up, but Judy continued to go on. “You are not lead officers! Excluding the Night Howler bust that Miss Bunny did with Officer Alex, you two are one-hit-wonders who should go back to meter-maiding and slinging pawpsicles!” Hoggbottom scolded.
It was at this point that Nick decided to cut in with his traditional Wilde style humor and wit. “If I may, I think someone’s just jealous that we got to drive the squeal mobile. Or maybe you thought it was your mama?” Nick teased the Razorback captain.
Hoggbottom let out an infuriated squeal and was about to break those toy sunglasses when Bogo and Alex stepped in. “ENOUGH OF THIS!” Alex howled, and the room fell silent.
“Everyone except Hopps, Wilde, and Moon! GET OUT.” Bogo demanded, and the other animals in the room scurried.
When the last creature was gone, Bogo sighed and his mask of anger faded away to reveal a tired old officer. The Cape buffalo turned to Judy and looked at her with understanding, his tone of voice softening. “Officer Hopps, despite my best efforts to avoid it, I like you. But this need to over-do it made both of you a headline today. And it reflects badly on me, on the department, and frankly, on any bunny hoping to follow in your footsteps. Not every case is going to save the world.” Bogo told Judy.
“Knock knock? Hi, you know, this sounds a lot like a “just-you guys” conversation, so what I’m going to do, is I’m gonna go ahead…” Nick quickly said as he tried to make a run for it.
Alex quickly stepped in front of the door, glaring down at the fox. “Is there a reason that you don’t take anything seriously?” Bogo asked Nick.
“Jokes are a classic defense mechanism for someone with a traumatic childhood.” Nick replied.
“Would you like a traumatic adulthood?” Bogo threatened.
Nick smiled and was about to make a comment, then reconsidered, and put his sunglasses away. “I would not.” Nick admitted.
Alex looked over to the newspaper clippings hung on Bogo’s wall, one of which was Judy and Nick’s arrest of Bellwether. “I didn’t fight your decision to change from me as your partner to Nick because you two solved the missing mammals case and the Night Howler conspiracy. I figured that you would do a better job with the animal that helped you accomplish those things.” Alex admitted.
“My thought process was very similar. I allowed you to work together because you did this city a great service… but today you messed it all up. And now some are questioning whether you should’ve been partners in the first place.” Bogo revealed.
Judy’s face quickly became alarmed and upset. “Sir…!” Judy protested.
“Instead of chasing down reptiles which may or may not be relevant to the safety of the city, Chief Bogo has decided to pull the two of you from field duty for the next few days.” Alex announced.
“And I am giving you a new assignment reserved for “special teams” like yourselves. Fail at this and I will have no choice but to split you up. There will be no more Hopps and Wilde. But... if you are as good as you think you are... this is your moment to shine.” Bogo finished.
Judy immediately saluted. “Yes sir!” The bunny doe exclaimed.
“Turn over to me a copy of all of this case information regarding what you found that pertains to the potential reptile. Out of all the members of the Zootopia Police Department, I’m the police officer with the most experience dealing with cold blooded animals.” Alex added.
“Will do, Officer Wolfbutt.” Nick chuckled as he and Judy exited the room.
Several hours later, Alex sat at Clawhauser’s front desk when he heard jeering and mock clapping. Lifting his head up from the case file and shedded reptilian skin samples that Judy had provided him, Alex saw several officers laughing at the fox and rabbit duo. “Roll out the red carpet, here’s the supercops!” One of the officers taunted as Judy and Nick passed by.
“What does the fox say? YOU SUCK!” Another one teased.
Alex wanted so desperately to put them in their place, but he knew that if anyone should, it should be Judy and Nick. To his surprise, Nick stopped her from giving them a piece of her mind...
Then when he saw Bloats and Higgins with *tattoos* of Nick and Judy's crudely drawn heads crying, something inside him snapped.
“Higgins, Bloats, show me those stomachs.” Alex called out. The two idiots turned to Alex, goofy grins on their faces as he then took a picture of their exposed stomachs. “Have fun with parking duty for the next year assholes.” Alex suddenly snarled.
The grins on the muzzles of the hippos faded. "Uh, what?" Bloats asked.
“And sent.” Alex smirked as he pressed a button on his phone.
Higgins looked panicked for a moment. “What did you just do?” The hippopotamus asked.
“I sent you purposefully showing your bare stomach to Animalian Resources, with tattoos of our star duo on your stomach and making fun of their screw up today. The only screw ups I see around here though right now are YOU. Because they are not going to allow any animal who acts like this near ANY important case.” Alex growled.
“Wilde makes jokes all the time!! You're seriously harping on us for some belly paint!?” Higgins protested.
Alex spied a porcupine quill still sticking out of Higgins's back. Immediately, he ran behind him and jammed the quill deeper into his fur causing the aquatic mammal to squeal in agony like a pig giving birth. “What I see is a *bully* who’s seizing the opportunity to make fun of an officer smaller than him. Wilde may be a smartass with his jokes but he knows when to stop and what lines to not cross. You, though? Nothing’s sacred to you.” Alex spat. Higgins whimpered as he could feel blood start to trickle down the back of his shirt. “And if you were in proper shape, you wouldn’t have been quilled. Now get out of my sight.” The wolf hissed.
The hippos sprinted away in terror as Denzelle watched from the upper balcony, sneering at the animals below for their behavior towards the duo. “Ugh. One botched operation and they’re treating those two like they’re the worst cops in the city, when really, those gamberros are. Well, except Alex. He’s earned my respect.” Denzelle grinned to herself while watching and listening to Alex berate the pair of hippos, sipping on her tea before turning and heading to her locker, not realizing that Alex wasn't yet finished.
The wolf whirled around to the equine partners. “This isn’t your college fraternity where you get to do whatever you want!” Alex shouted to the rest of them.
Zebrowski and Zebraxton started to slowly inch away. “Zebros out.” They whispered.
Alex whirled to face the two of them. “AND YOU! ZEBRAXTON AND ZEBROWSKI! I don’t know what the hell the two of you are thinking but you and I both know you barely did anything to help out with the arrest of the anteater! Hoggbottom did the work of apprehending Snootley, you’re lucky she didn’t care about the credit this time! You cannot and will not take credit for the work of older officers!” Alex scolded.
The two turned to him and saluted. “YES SIR!” Zebraxton and Zebrowski yelled.
“Zebrowski! If you don’t wash that ridiculous fur paint off of you then you’re either going to get high off of the paint fumes, poisoning from the raw amount of paint you’re applying to your skin, or you’re going to go blind when you accidentally paint your eyes and the chemicals permanently screw up your vision! SURELY there are more productive ways to allocate the time you have in a day than to spend at least an hour reapplying that gunk!” Alex argued.
“…No promises.” Zebrowski muttered to himself.
Alex sighed before storming off and taking a seat next to Denzelle. “I swear. Some of these officers need a serious psych evaluation.” Alex groaned.
“Estupidez y locura. A dangerous combination.” Denzelle chuckled.