Chapter Text
All of the words Mike wanted to say were clogged in his throat. It's like he physically couldn't push them out, no matter how hard he tried. It had always been that way. Or, perhaps it had only gotten worse with time. When they were younger, Mike would confide in the party. But as time went on, he felt himself close off in a way he couldn't prevent. He didn't know how to. So, he stopped talking about himself. At least, the things that mattered. Instead, he learned to deflect and defend. Then there was Will, who somehow broke down all the horrible, aching walls around Mike’s heart. And the funny part was that Will didn't have to try. It just happened.
That changed when Mike changed. He knew Will wanted to hang on to the last shreds of their childhood. He knew Will wanted things to stay the same. And he knew he was being a dick to Will. But things spiraled. And then Will was no longer an exception in the rule. He was no longer the outlier. He was just like everyone else.
And Mike had no one.
But that wasn't Will’s fault. It wasn't anyone's fault but Mike’s own. That being said, Mike never got over the feeling of being isolated in such a vulnerable way.
And now, he was worried he'd mess up again, after he had finally let Will—and began to let everyone else—back in.
“Mike,” Will whispered.
They still had their movie nights every Friday, even after the messy reveal that Mike had feelings—he loved Will.
Mike hadn't been able to tell his ex-girlfriends he loved them, but had immediately confessed to it the moment Will looked into his eyes. He was hopeless.
“Mike.”
It's been two weeks. And everything had gone back to somewhat normal. Besides the fact that Mike refused to initiate contact with Will now, and sometimes couldn't look him in the eye for too long. But, besides that, everything was wonderful.
“Will,” Mike began, daring to take a glance at Will, who looked concerned. It melted the chunk of ice that was Mike’s heart. “Sorry, just, uh, I was wanting to talk to you about something.”
The movie went on without either of them. They had already watched this one five times. They owned it. So, truly, it didn't matter, but Mike still felt bad.
“What's up?” Will asked, angling his body towards Mike.
Swallowing thickly, Mike wrung his hands together. “Uh, well, I was just wondering, if, uh, if I've bothered you any lately. Or—well, no…”
Will waited patiently, his head tilted to the side in the most adorable and sweet way. His eyes caught the light just right and Mike felt his mouth go dry.
“I know I can be very physically affectionate sometimes. I have a horrible sense of personal space. And I'm rather awful at hiding how much I—” he sighed. “I just don't want to make you uncomfortable.”
“Oh! No, no, Mike, you haven't.” Will laughed a bit, looking away with a small frown. “I mean, sure, I was surprised when you opened up to me again, which involved the kind of clinginess you used to have when we were kids, but I wasn't unhappy about it. I did wonder recently if it was because of…well. You know. You didn't kinda stop getting close after our talk…”
“Wait! I didn't—that was because I didn't want to step over any boundaries I, like, didn't know were there. You know?” He smiled awkwardly in an attempt to ease the tension. It didn't work. “You know?”
“Oh, okay. That makes sense. Thank you, Mike.”
Will looked at him then. Mike struggled to focus again. But he managed to get his train of thought back on those damn tracks. “Uh, so, what's off limits?”
“Hm?”
“Like, is there anything you aren't comfortable with that I need to know?”
“Oh.”
After years of friendship, Mike knew Will enough to understand most of the lines he shouldn't cross. But things had changed. They had changed.
“Well, I'm really comfortable with anything. I trust you, Mike.”
Mike's heart thunked against his sternum, speeding up. God, Will would be the death of him. With those long lashes and that pretty mouth. And—do not look at his mouth, Mike.
Slowly, Will frowned. Mike tracked the motion before snapping his gaze back, catching the wide-eyed look on Will’s face as he realized.
“Sorry! Uh—I—!” Mike stood abruptly, shaking out his long limbs. “Sorry!”
Before he could even take a step, Will had his hand around his wrist. “Let's finish the movie, okay? Plus, I'd like to know any boundaries you have that I should know about.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah, oh.” Will giggled.
Mike groaned, flopping back on the couch. “Please! Have mercy!”
“Hmmm, I don't know. You're kinda cute when you're flustered.”
Will looked just as surprised as Mike did. “That's the opposite of mercy!”
It took all of two seconds before Will burst out laughing, his head tipped back. Mike couldn't be mad at Will when he looked like that. He was practically glowing. Even if he was making fun of Mike, who curled his knees against his chest.
“Mean Byers. Mean!” Mike poked his side, hissing.
“Hey!” Will only laughed harder, tears gathering in the corners of his eyes. “No fair, you know I'm ticklish.”
“Oh, I do.” Mike grinned, shifted so he could reach out with his other arm.
And he tickled Will, who squirmed, kicking out lightly. His laughter echoed off the walls and filled Mike’s heart with so much love he felt like he might explode.
“Okay! Okay! I give up! I'm sorry!”
Mike pulled back, his teeth barred in what he would consider an ugly smile, but he barely registered it. He was so, so happy.
As Will caught his breath, Mike untangled himself. His feet rested flat on the floor now, his hands in his lap.
“Okay, okay. Serious talk.”
“Serious, yes.”
Will waited now, a sparkle on his eyes that was hard to ignore.
“I don't really have anything I am uncomfortable with. You don't make me uncomfortable. You're my best friend. And I enjoy being around you. And, like, I've always enjoyed any type of…affection or appreciation you show me. So, I guess I trust you, too.”
“Okay…” Will was still smiling.
“Okay.”
.
Each day, Alyssa would apologize to Mike before he even had a chance to sit down for class. And each day he told her it was fine. Of course, she was up to date on the situation, but that didn't mean she was any less worried.
But everything had been perfect. Mike and Wil had two loaded but meaningful conversations. And they still had their weekly gossip session. They still sat together for dinner when they could. They still spent more time around one another than alone. Nothing had changed, really. But sometimes, sometimes Mike couldn't look at Will for too long without getting incredibly flustered. Will never pointed it out, but Mike knew he was aware. Will notice everything. Especially when Mike would slip up and his eyes would drift somewhere they weren't supposed to.
But that didn't mean anything had changed.
And if Will leaned a little further away on the couch or avoided eye contact during the quiet hours of the night, it didn't mean anything.
And it definitely didn't mean anything when Mike nearly fell asleep listening to his voice one night. Nor did it mean anything when Will brushed the curls off of Mike's face as they sat together, their knees together and eyes locked.
And no, Mike wasn't going insane.
“Sure you aren't,” Alyssa sighed. “Listen, I think he—”
“Don't.” Mike's voice quivered but he held steady as she glared. “Don't even. It isn't like that.”
They were sitting together in a small cafe just off campus. They both had just had their last class of the day and were getting ready to go home when Mike blurted out that they needed to talk. And talk he did.
His phone rang.
“Sorry, let me just step outside,” Mike whispered. She nodded, and he headed out the door and around the corner.
There wasn't anyone around.
“Hey,” he answered. He already knew who it was.
“I thought you were going to come home?”
Oh, god, Mike could hear the pout in Will’s voice. It tugged at his heart. “Oh, uh, sorry, did my text not go through?” He had messaged Will to say he'd be gone for a bit.
“Yeah, it did, but it's been three hours.”
The sun was setting and the air was growing colder by the minute.
“I lost track of time, sorry.”
Alyssa stepped out, grinning. “Is that Will?” She was holding their drinks.
“Did you pay?” Mike asked, tilting the phone away from his ear a bit. “You didn't have to do that.”
“Oh, you're with Alyssa?”
“Let me say hi!”
Mike huffed. “She wants to talk to you, Will.”
“Okay…”
Mike handed off the phone, then crossed his arms over his chest as Alyssa immediately began to ramble. He took his coffee from her. It had gone cold, but he wasn't about to waste her money.
“Oh, and, I was trying to convince Mike to let me dress him up again! I mean, he looked so pretty in my under—”
“Alyssa!” Mike shrieked, grabbing his phone back. “Ignore her! God, please ignore her!”
“You tried on her underwear?” Will asked. His voice was muffled like he was trying not to laugh.
“Ignore her!” Mike shouted again.
A few people walking by gave them dirty looks, but Mike was too embarrassed to care much about that. Because Will was laughing now, really laughing, and his voice sounded like heaven.
“You're so in love with him,” Alyssa mouthed.
He was, wasn't he?
He was hopeless.