Chapter Text
Amnesia, Sasaki Shumei had amnesia from hitting his head. The doctor explained that due to the lack of physical harm to his head this was most likely temporary amnesia, but to please take measures as if it could be permanent just in case of, as these issues are quite unpredictable, and most likely is not the same as definitely.
Since there’s no medication for amnesia and he seemed to have no other issues, he was discharged quite quickly with a prescription for headaches and something for the muscular pain from the fall but asked to come back twice a week for psychotherapy.
He hadn’t seen that Miyano guy since his first day at the hospital, it had been a week, thankfully he left shortly after the kissing incident, at first he wondered what would possess this guy to just randomly kiss a stranger, and another guy at that, but then Satoko explained to him that apparently they were dating, and both of their families knew of this.
One thing was for sure, his mind was a mess.
It’s not that I think two guys dating each other is a bad thing, but, me? Attracted to a guy? Although to be fair, I’ve never really been all that attracted to anyone before so I can’t say I’m straight either, and I did sort of find him cute when I saw him? But then that kiss, that was the most uncomfortable thing I’ve ever experienced in my life, is it because I don’t remember him? Or is it because I don’t actually like him? Sometimes this whole thing feels like a prank played on me, but Satoko would never do that.
His thoughts were suddenly interrupted by a text from Hirano:
“You better be there today. I rescheduled something important to help you with your idiot brain”
Man that guy is angry, but Ogasawara said we got even closer during our second year in High School so he can help me fill in some blanks here and there.
“Maybe if I smack him again he’ll get his memories back.” Said Hirano with an angry tone in his voice.
Hanzawa started chuckling at this but covered his mouth to try to contain himself.
Worried that Hirano might actually try to hurt him, Sasaki asked “Does any of your solutions don’t include violence?”
“You hurt Miyano! You deserve to be smacked!” replied the angry blonde.
With a scared voice Sasaki retorted in a loud voice “I don’t even know WHO Miyano is! Help me out here Ogasawara.”
Ogasawara who kept looking at Sasaki as if he grew another head snapped out of it to answer calmly “Honestly, I still find it weird, a Sasaki who’s not obsessed with his fudanshi lover.”
You could see the gears turning in Sasaki’s head “What’s a fudanshi?”
This time Hanzawa couldn’t contain his laughter.
Ogasawara nonchalantly said “Yup, his mind’s really gone alright.”
Changing the topic Sasaki asked “Assuming you’re talking about that Miyano guy, when you say obsessed…” he trailed off.
Ogasawara then answered “Head over heels, crazy personality change, lived and breathed for him, you even went to school on days you didn’t have to just to be with him.” He was starting to get agitated with the memories.
Sasaki simply said “Yeah, I’m having a hard time believing that.”
Irritated at the two Hirano interrupted them to say “You two are missing the point here, Miyano is not the only thing this idiot doesn’t remember, he also thought he was still in high school, and in first year too, so first things first, Sasaki, what’s the last thing you remember?”
“Mmh” he started to think about it.
What was the last thing I remember again?
“Well” he started to explain “it seems things related to school like the math, the English, the accounting classes from college even, I remember most of it as knowledge that just belongs to me, the college even did a test of their own to assess if I could continue to attend classes or not, and for the meantime I’ll be able to but I have to take it easy.” He paused to think a little more “but things like, memories of me studying all that, or going to school, hanging out with you guys, that is gone, in my mind it’s like we’re still in our first year of high school”
Hanzawa spoke up “Uh, I’ve read about this, it’s about the theory of different intelligences, when you get amnesia, your brain can select to keep some information and erase another, or you can forget all of it.” He said with some amusement in his voice.
“I’m surprised this guy even has intelligence” Hirano muttered under his breath.
“Hey! I heard that!” said Sasaki with indignation.
“Good, cause I can repeat it louder” answered Hirano with some defiance in his voice.
Tired of his friend’s antics Sasaki replied “Seriously, what is your deal today? If you didn’t want to help you can leave.”
At that Hanzawa chuckled again and said to Hirano, “this certainly has nothing to do with Kagiura’s upset face from earlier today, does it?”
With a death glare Hirano just replied, “Shut up Hanzawa.”
Hirano remembered his fight with his boyfriend when he had to cancel their date to help Sasaki out of all people with this memory issue. As upset as Kagiura was to not be able to see his boyfriend, when he explained about how Sasaki had a partner he didn’t remember, his romantic side made him much more understanding of the situation. However, what made them fight was the conversation they had right after this.
“This is so heartbreaking” said a sad Kagiura “I don’t know what I’d do if I couldn’t remember you Hirano-san, my life would suck so much.”
Hirano chuckled and answered “if you couldn’t remember me your life would just go on, that’s part of not remembering, you know? It wouldn’t hurt because you wouldn’t know me.”
Hirano then noticed his puppy-like boyfriend’s hurt face and realized he’d messed up.
“So, what you’re telling me is” He answered in a low sad voice “if you forgot me, you wouldn’t care?”
“I… I” Hirano stuttered “I mean… I would just… I mean, it’s not fair, I don’t know what I would do, besides this is absurd! None of us will lose their memories.”
This did nothing to make Kagiura feel better “Yeah, because I bet Sasaki-san was planning on losing his memories and breaking his partner’s heart that day.”
“Of course not but, eugh!” said a very frustrated Hirano.
“And at least he’s trying to remember” continued Kagiura “I mean isn’t that why he asked you all to meet?”
“Yes!” answered the blonde seeing a chance “and if I were to get amnesia too, they would definitely help me remember you, because they’d know the me with memories would care.”
“Then” answered a more enthusiastic Kagiura “you need to make sure he remembers Taiga! So that he will also help you if you forget me.”
Hirano wasn’t sure what he got himself into, all he knew was, he’d have no peace with his boyfriend unless Sasaki was able to remember Miyano, but also, he had absolutely no idea how to make an amnesiac remember anything, so he figured he’d try to walk step by step with him until they reached the Miyano memories.
Back to the present with his friends questioning looks he calmed himself down to get into real helping mode, he knew getting frustrated with Sasaki was gonna get them nowhere, and his boyfriend’s (and his) sanity seemed to depend on this.
Taking a deep breath Hirano continued with a more calm tone “Ok, so you remember cognitive knowledge, that’s good, it means you can continue studying, the issue seems to be your episodic memory.”
“The what knowledge? and my what memory?” said a very confused Sasaki.
Before Hirano could get heated again Hanzawa explained “Your study knowledge and your things that happened to you memory” he paused a moment to think “I wonder if it’s good as you say Hirano, I mean, if he was missing his cognitive memory he would only have to study, but what do you to remember events that already happened and can’t precisely repeat themselves?”
“Can’t we simply recreate some of his most important memories?” answered Ogasawara trying to help.
With his hand on his mouth as if in deep-thought Hanzawa answered “Well, there’s no much telling of what those important memories would be, I mean, besides his relationship with Miyano and graduation I don’t know many big events pertaining Sasaki’s personal life.”
“Well” said a hopeful Ogasawara “we could start by recreating Sasaki meeting Miyano.”
“That won’t do” answered Hirano in a firm voice.
Ogasawara tried to convince him “This is not a memory only Sasaki has, the fudanshi must remember too how they met.”
The fudanshi? Pondered a very confused Sasaki.
Breathing a sigh Hirano answered “No, I know how they met, and as much as I want Sasaki to remember Miyano” And God do I want him to remember he thought to himself, he then continued “we’re not getting someone beat up just to make it happen.”
“How the hell did I meet this guy?” asked a gradually more confused Sasaki.
“Well according to the report of the incident at the Disciplinary Committee” answered a very amused Hanzawa “you were his knight in shining armor.” He said emphasizing those last words.
Sasaki felt a combination of flustered and confused “Yeah, maybe I could try remembering graduation instead, I mean it’s not like I want to remember dating a guy.”
Hirano’s chest tightened ah, he thought this was what went through Kagi’s mind, this ugly feeling.
“Sasaki” said Hirano with a very softened tone, and slightly nostalgic face “I know it’s not fair to try to force you to remember Miyano.”
Sasaki lowered his face and mumbled “It’s not that I don’t want to, it’s just I don’t see why I should.”
Hirano continued “Because you two weren’t just boyfriends, in fact, it took over a year for you two to start dating.” With Kagiura in mind he said “Before that you two were best friends, you were constantly supporting each other, motivating one another, talking each other’s ears off, caring for the other, and honestly...” he paused for a moment.
Sasaki raised his face and starred at Hirano waiting for him to continue.
“Honestly, you don’t need to be Miyano’s boyfriend” He continued “But a friendship that helps you grow the way you two helped each other, I think it’s worth fighting for.”
Hirano knew that if Kagiura were to ever forget about him, losing him as a boyfriend would be heartbreaking, but losing him as his best friend would completely destroy him, so he hoped that this way at least Miyano wouldn’t completely lose Sasaki.
Sasaki sighed and asked again “So, what do you recommend I do?”
“Talk to him” Answered his blonde friend “meet up at a coffee shop or a park, and see how you feel with having him as a friend.”
Sasaki squirmed a bit and answered, “But what if tries to kiss me again?”
At that Hanzawa couldn’t control the burst of laughter and answered, “Who would’ve thought someone would think of our sweet little kouhai as a pervert?”
And irritated Hirano answered, “He won’t, trust me, Miyano is not that kind of person.”
Seeing at how his friends would insist this hard on how he had to try to at least befriend this Miyano guy, and add to that how his family got a little sad when they also learned he didn’t remember him, he decided to text him that night so they could maybe meet the next day since it was the weekend.
After his shower that night Sasaki grabbed his phone ready to ask the guy who had supposedly been his boyfriend to meet.
He remembered when he got his phone back at the hospital, first thing he noticed was that this was a different model than the one he had, more modern, but his password was the same. Then, there was the wallpaper, usually he kept the phone’s generic wallpaper, but this time he had a blue bunny for some reason, he decided to leave as is so that maybe he’d remember something about it, but nothing yet.
When he opened his mail (he went for this instead of Line because the time he opened the chat he immediately felt uncomfortable from all the love messages he didn’t remember sending) he noticed he had a draft that he never sent, of course it was for Miyano, when he read it he felt uncomfortable again, as if he was reading someone else’s private message “After today we’ll be one step closer to finish what we started in your room.” He felt mortified, and his thoughts consumed him again.
What did we start in his room? Does this mean we haven’t done everything? How much HAVE WE done? Thank God I never sent this.
He then sent him the email to meet before he changed his mind.
To: Yoshikazu Miyano
From: Shumei Sasaki
“Hey, sorry for snapping at you at the hospital, I really think we should talk, are you free anytime this weekend?”
Almost as if he’d been waiting for this message the reply less than a minute to get there.
To: Shumei Sasaki
From Yoshikazu Miyano
“Don’t worry about it, it was kind of my fault for doing such a thing to someone in a hospital bed, I promise it won’t happen again. I’m free all weekend, let me know when and where do you want to meet.”
It’s not that Sasaki hadn’t believed Hirano when he said Miyano wouldn’t do that, but he felt some relief after reading him say he wouldn’t, with that settled he gave him the location of a coffee shop and told him to meet the next day.