Chapter Text
It was another day, and this time when he woke up, he felt a lot better than he had recently. Instead of the dread of Sirius ignoring him for yet another day, he couldn’t wait to talk to Pandora again. To discuss about whatever thing that comes to mind, he was the first one up, like always. It made it easier to hide away his plushie back in his trunk before going to the bathroom to take a shower, before Barty or Evan hog it.
His uniform was straightened and perfect and even smelled of cedar, far better than the heavy scent Kreacher uses back home, hmm, maybe he can ask if Kreacher wouldn’t mind switching. At least for his loads, so it won’t affect anyone else.
When he came out, Evan was already waiting, snores still coming from Barty’s bed. “It's free for you.” He left the door open and the lights on as he went to his desk. Evan yawned, giving a quick ‘thanks’ before taking over the bathroom.
His bag was already packed and ready for class, but he also grabbed something new, one of the books he brought with him that wasn’t for school. It was an older book that he read over and over again and could probably recite if asked.
The book was not what one would expect, not some stupid childish kid’s book, but instead about different spells far out of reach that his only months' worth of teachers could do, but maybe one day. He just needs to study hard, learn more, but he is sure Pandora would enjoy the reads at least as long as she didn’t mess with any of his added notes.
He packed away the book and started his way to the Great Hall, being one of the first few, he took his seat, the one he had grown used to, near the end of the table, right at the edge between the Slytherin and Ravenclaw.
Was there a real reason for it? No, mostly just that it was the spot he took his first day here, so where he will stay, it definitely had nothing to do with the fact that he doesn’t want to feel hurt every time he looks up and sees Sirius.
His bag is beside him, and the plates are empty, only going to fill once everyone gets down. And that took a while, Evan came down perfect, taking the seat beside Regulus so he could talk to Pandora when she came down, which wasn’t too much time.
Pandora smiled, taking the seat close enough to them while still being at her housetable, their chatter quiet but excited. Part of him wanted to show her the book he took, but it felt rude to interrupt them, so maybe later.
And when Barty came down, oh boy, he was a mess. Clearly, Evan woke him up after his shower. So that left Barty with still wet hair at the ends of his hair, his shirt rumpled, still trying to button up the top buttons, and a tie thrown around his neck. The look made Regulus want to pull his hair out; this would have had him tossed back into his room if Mother had seen him like this.
“Hey, is food here yet?” Barty asked, taking up the seat in front of Regulus, who was now cursed to see the mess he was.
“Nope,” Evan answered, turning back, “should be soon, you are one of the last few, and time should be soon.”
Barty nodded, finishing up the second-to-last button, but left the top one still open without a care, tying his tie weakly, which made Regulus just want to go around and fix it.
He nearly did before remembering Pandora and Evan weren’t talking anymore, giving him the chance. Regulus reached down for his bag when the food appeared…okay, maybe later it is rude to stop someone mid-meal.
Sitting back up, he looked down at the table, at the unfamiliar or nearly familiar, but it made him feel not right, and then at his own plate. Familiar and acceptable, sure was it the same dish as yesterday over the last week? Maybe, but does it taste delicious every time? Definitely.
Yet as he dug it, Regulus could help but feel a bit of guilt; he knew how much it takes to cook and bake, and when Mother and Sirius had fights, the kitchen was always his favorite place to go ever since he was little. It had a small entrance for Kreacher, which, even now, was easy to crawl into; it was quiet and out of sight, so Mother never went there to avoid the help.
He spent years watching Kreacher cook their meals, he was quite nice though Sirius never gave a care, actually, no one did. So it must take Hogwarts’ house elves a great deal to prepare their normal meals, and on top of them to make a special one just for him.
Regulus was halfway through, ignoring the loud chatter, doing as he does at most dinner parties by having it mostly fade into the background. Until Barty loudly pointed at his plate, “Why does Regulus’s plate look so different than ours?”
A few others raised their heads at his announcement, bringing a new wave of heat down Regulus’s neck. He felt a similar wave when he first started to get his meals. But back then, the ability to eat without having to hide how he wanted to pull out his throat and replace it with another that can actually eat the damn food. Now he doesn’t have that feeling to cover up the guilt, what if they want his meal too, and think he is above them all?
Sure, Blacks are above most, but it still felt wrong for him to do so.
Thankfully, Evan only shrugged, “Why does it matter we all got food?” he pushed the comment aside like it was normal for one person to eat that way, different than the others. Barty looked over at the difference in their meals before going back to his own food.
“Okay,” Barty muttered, brushing a hand through his hair that was now more damp than wet. He still gave a glance at Regulus’s plate that made him want to hide it before finally looking back.
Regulus let out a breath of air, looking back to his plate, wanting to go back to everyone’s voices to be back to a faint hum.
When breakfast was done, and the dishes were empty, people started moving from their tables to classes. Regulus too grabbed his bag as Barty struggled to tie his tie, having to redo it. Taking a moment to glance inside the bag, should he give the book now? Is the book a little too weird to give to Pandora after only one real talk?
The hesitation filled him. Pandora hadn’t left yet. Taking an ink bottle from Evan’s bag, she must have forgotten her own bottle again. He pulled out the book and chose the silent option, which was placing the book next to her bag and heading to his class.
If she wants to read it, she can read it, and if she doesn’t want to, then she can give it back. His name was written in the book, so it wasn’t like it was a stranger’s book.
Classes were a mix of boredom and excitement. History of Magic had half of the class asleep, but Transfiguration was fun, trying to turn a match into a needle, and it was hard; it was their lesson for this week. Some students got bored halfway through and were more waving their wands in a similar design to get class over with.
Others like Regulus were really trying, and it wasn’t easy. He always thought magic would be easy after all, it's everywhere in his life, but no, it was far harder than he assumed. By the end of the class, Regulus managed to get the match to a silvery color and colder, not yet metal, but it was close enough for the day.
When lunch came between classes again, the guilt came; it was the same meal, yet it must have taken extra time to get it done. He wishes he could just make it himself so it won’t be as much of a bother, but then again, Mother would have told him that it is to be expected. Not as she knows, she would more likely lean towards Regulus, just sucking it up and eating the food served.
So he took slower bites, finishing the meal late, but managed to get the last bite in before the food vanished, yet he was the first to grab his things.
The same thing went on repeat after lunch, back to classes, which he was excited for, another one of his favorites, charms. Flitwick talked fast, so it was a bit hard if he got distracted, but over the two months, he grew used to the faster speech. Though it didn’t mean sometimes he wished he could just know everything about charms already.
Some of the inexperienced confuse charms with spells, and it can be seen why; both are where one uses their wand in a certain motion with a certain word, and something will happen. But there is a big difference, charms can be worked on, they can be fit together like pieces of a puzzle until something new is formed.
Their house was filled with such charming work, some great relative who once ran the house long ago. Charms that kept the house in top shape, the portraits keep moving, and even their frames will change. Small but flawless, it used to always interest him in a way, especially the charms that aren’t obvious.
The way dark stains of their large dining table would move, so slowly, but each time you sat down, the design before you was new. Or how the tapestry of our family, each figure that had their face would age with the person.
Maybe he, too, can get to that level.
When classes were finally finished, he followed the rest of the Slytherin first years. Evan’s chatter was blending with Barty’s; whatever yell was coming from the Gryffindor table was muffling.
Gryffindor.
Regulus risked taking a glance back, sitting on the end had its advantages but disadvantages too, like having to crain his neck to try and look over. It was hard having to look past the Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs across the room, but he spotted him.
Sirius, with his big smile, but it didn’t quite feel right, it didn’t feel real, kind of like the smile he does in front of adults. But not quite, it wasn’t forced to hide back anger or boredom but something else. What is that something else?
There was a tap on his shoulder that made him nearly jump, “Regulus?”
He turned his head away from Sirius to his right, only to find Pandora’s blue eyes on him, right, the book she must have found it. Regulus turned, pulling his legs out and around the wooden plank that kept him from turning to face her, “Yes? What is it?”
“I found a book. Did you leave it?”
He nodded, it was quite obvious he did, his name being in it besides who else would? “Yes, I did. Have you started reading it?”
She broke into a smile, but her eyes still felt a bit too bright for him to stay focused on. “Yes, I started reading it during my History of Magic, quite interesting. I loved your notes on the pages on Charm Work. Actually, I wanted to talk to you about it. Can I keep it for a bit? I'm not done with it yet.”
Regulus nodded, “Of course you can, it's why I gave it.”
Pandora’s smile seemed to widen, getting excited, “Okay, thank you, and don’t worry, I will make sure to keep it in good condition.” She grabbed her bag, following after the other Ravenclaws. “Bye, Ev!” she called out to her twin, giving him a quick wave.
Evan watched, waving back at her before glancing over at Regulus, “What did you give her?” he was curious, but knowing his sister, it could be really anything, a shiny rock to a complex, detailed spell that was new that no one their age should understand.
Regulus looked over, “Oh, a book on charms.” Was that alright? Or was he breaking some rule, not knowing how the Rosiers are, their rules or restrictions?
“Charms?” Evan repeated, “Great, she is probably going to ramble my ears off,” but his tone wasn’t angry, but amused, letting out a laugh. “I'm sure she will have fun with it at least now come on, let's get back to our dorm, I got some homework to do.”
“Right,” Regulus nodded, grabbing his bag, turning to Barty, who was already gone, of course. So instead, he hurried after Evan. He can’t wait to actually have someone to talk about since Sirius never found any enjoyment in such books.
They were going out of the Great Hall, but took the opportunity, being behind Evan, to take a look back. He searched through the group going the opposite way, at their red ties and patches, the search took a bit before finding Sirius.
For a second, they made eye contact, Sirius and Regulus.
For a second, hope filled Regulus. Forgetting Narcissa’s advice, he wanted to run over, hoping they could leave the fight behind him.
But that is all it lasted, for a second. Before Sirius turned back and hurried after his little group of friends, friends that Regulus had never truly met properly.
His grip tightened on his book bag before turning away as well and hurried after a white head of hair that was Evan. Maybe he just needs a few more days, yeah, that’s it.
He hopes.