Chapter Text
It took a while for The Gloomy Boy to realize his situation. The school day had already come to an end, and there he was, crumpled up on the edge of his bed recounting all the significantly small occurrences that had happened throughout the day.
It was rare for anyone to spend time with The Gloomy Boy, as he didn't possess the
charismatic persona he had tried so hard to put off. Luckily, he didn’t need to do much more thinking, as his older sister TsuTsu (as he likes to call her), waddled into the room with a mouth full of cotton candy.
“You want some?” She asked.
The Gloomy Boy shook his head and patted the space next to him as a gesture for her to sit down.
“So, you make friends with the new kid?” Ripping off a bigger sized piece of the colored foam, she continued. “I saw you two together. Honestly, it was pretty nice seeing you talk to someone. How’d that go?”
“Well I–”
“Oh, and before you say anything, don’t get all pessimistic, like you always do. Seriously, you’ve gotta try and be a little more content with yourself.” Her hands were started to stick to the candy.
“No, I’m pretty happy with this. I think.”
Suddenly, TsuTsu turned her head over to look at her little brother. A wide smile peeked its way through her mess of cotton candy.
“What?”
No response.
“What dude..? You asked!”
All she did was smile. Well, until she started tackling The Gloomy Boy and kissing his forehead repeatedly.
“Ew! Stop that, you’re so gross!” The Gloomy Boy said through laughter. He was being serious, though.
“Alright, alright!” TsuTsu yielded. “Seriously, though. You think this is it?”
“Yeah, I mean…He seemed like he didn’t mind talking to me. Plus, he’s pretty cool.”
“How’d you hit it off in the first place anyway?”
“Well, you know the really energetic and colorful girl in my class? I call her Smiles.”
Picking up a piece of dropped cotton candy, TsuTsu replies, “Oh that is an adorable name for her. Matches her for real!”
The Gloomy Boy scoffs. “Well yeah, she came up to me and told me that apparently Rune-emi was wond–”
“Rune-emi huh? Already got a nickname for him I see.” TsuTsu giggles throughout her words.
“Alright, dude, stop interrupting me, you asked, so listen.” The Gloomy Boy waits until his older sister definitively nods her head that she won’t interrupt any longer, and he goes on after an exaggerated sigh.
“Anyway, Rune-emi was looking for me, I suppose. I sort-of forgot the reason why, but we didn’t talk at break anyway. I went up to him during class, and he gave me his name but other than that we didn’t talk much,” The Gloomy Boy readjusts his seating on his bed, one leg dangling while the other wrapped in his arm. “We talked in Clothing, though. He needed help with this zipper pouch project we’re working on, and he was seated near me so I took the opportunity.”
“Oh wow,” TsuTsu says sarcastically, “You took the opportunity?”
The Gloomy Boy rolls his eyes.
“It was a nice exchange, I guess. He’s actually pretty good at lining up the fabrics.”
“The one thing you suck at!” She scoffs and flicks at her brothers knee.
“His stitching is… really bad though. Even with the machine.”
“It’s alright, it took me a while to do straight stitches too.” TsuTsu leans back on the bed, hair braided black hair spreading out underneath her. Her shirt lifts up a bit, and she pulls it back down and returns her arm onto her chest.
“I’m really happy for you, YuYu.” YuYu is the nickname The Gloomy Boy’s older sister gave him when they were younger.
“Thank you,” he says through a small smile. “Though, I’m kind of scared, TsuTsu.” The Gloomy Boy falls onto his side, facing his sister.
“Why?” She asks.
“What if it ends up like how it did with…You know.” He buries his face in his arm.
“I get it. But, what happened to him was out of your–all of our–control. Death is something everyone has to face eventually. Just sucks his time had to be sooner rather than later.” TsuTsu reaches out her hand and places it on The Gloomy Boy’s head, scrunching his hair.
“Plus, he wouldn’t want you to be stuck on this for the rest of your life. I don’t know much about that kid, but I can say for sure he wanted the best for you. Just like I do.”
The conversation the siblings are having refer to the passing of a very close friend of The Gloomy Boy’s two years ago. It wrecked him like crazy, mainly because he felt like he could have saved his best friend if he had tried hard enough.
“I just miss Sabito, man.” The Gloomy Boy says.
Tsutsu doesn’t say anything immediate, recognizing the hurt that her little brother must truly feel deep within him. After all, Sabito is the only one The Gloomy Boy has never given a nickname to.
The little brother jumps up from the bed to stretch his legs. He falls back onto the bed on his stomach.
“What about you, TsuTsu?” He asks.
“What do you mean?”
“Is ‘you know who’ being any better of a douchebag to you?”
“Ah, him.” TsutTsu raises her head up and fixes her hair, letting out a long sigh before continuing. Her mood has noticeably dropped.
“I love him, you know. I just–Man. People, right?” She laughs insincerely.
“What’d he do now?” The Gloomy Boy’s disappointment is barely being contained.
“Nothing in particular. Just another day of rats and the rumbles I guess.” She pauses, “I’m considering leaving him, though.”
“Wait, what?!” The Gloomy Boy’s disappointment turns into excitement.
“Oh wow, don’t get too devastated.” She jokes.
“Devastated? Dude–I’ve been begging you to leave him for… years now! He’s no good for you, at all!” The two sit up on their butts in sync.
“It’s just gonna be really, really, really,” her voice drops, “really, really, really, really,” her voice raises back up, “really, really complicated to get him to listen, Let alone tell him. Hope he takes it well enough to leave me in one piece!” Her laughter is once more ingenuine.
“Nah, don’t worry. I’ll beat his ass if he tries anything.” The Gloomy Boy makes a silly fighting face, with his fists playfully punching the air next to his sister’s shoulder.
TsuTsu gets up, and starts to leave. “You’re an ant compared to him, you know.” She reaches for the door handle.
“You know, ants are pretty strong for their size. You don’t know what they’re truly capable of.” The two make faces at each other, and The Gloomy Boy tells TsuTsu to shut the door. She leaves it open just a smudge to annoy him.
The next morning wasn’t as horrible as it had been previously. Though the weight of loss still seeped through the cracks of his heart, The Gloomy Boy managed to look into the mirror for a healthier amount of time. Part of him thought that he would finally be getting better, but the rest of him thought that was rather foolish.
Later in the day, as the bell for lunch rang, he went to his usual spot with his older sister and her friends. It made being alone less…attention-seeking, in a way.
At least, that was the plan. Rune-emi called out for The Gloomy Boy from behind, and caught up to him rather quickly. Rune-emi had an apple and some
pretzels, but that was pretty much it.
He noticed The Gloomy Boy staring at his smaller pick of a meal, so he spoke up. “I gave the rest of my lunch to my younger sister. And my younger brother, and my oth–Yeah you get it.”
All The Gloomy Boy could do was look at Rune-emi, he couldn’t think of another way to continue the conversation. He was also afraid he’d stutter, and ruin everything as usual.
“You want the pretzels?” Rune-emi held his hand with the pretzel bag out.
“No, I’m okay.”
The moment was awkward in of itself, but what made it worse was the standing in the middle of the cafeteria entrance. Kids were pushing and shoving the two out of the way left and right. It was pretty hard to hold a conversation there.
“There’s an empty bench over that side,” Rune-emi points to the further end of the room, “Let’s go sit there, yeah?” He asks.
Without second thought, The Gloomy Boy found himself walking side by side with the other boy. He didn’t quite understand particularly why Rune-emi was preferring to hang out with him over the very clearly desperate popular kids looking for someone new to add to their group. People time and time again have mistaken The Gloomy Boy’s attitudes and avoidance as a superiority complex, and tended to stay away. Rune-emi, however, either didn’t feel that way, or was too humble to be picky.
The boys sat at the bench facing away from the left side of the wall, looking at all the chaos unfold in front of them through loud conversations of gossip.
“No, because–like–why would she even do that?” One girl said.
“Right! She’s such a bitch.” Another dragged out.
A silent agreement was exchanged between the two boys that they wanted nothing to do with the conversation nearby, so they immediately looked for topics to discuss.
“So,” The Gloomy Boy said hesitantly, “you got any siblings?”
“Actually I do. Six. I’m the oldest of them.” Rune-emi rested his elbow on the table, his head, a hand. “What about you?”
“Uh, only TsuTsu–my sister. My older sister that is. She’s seventeen right now.” He scratched his head, looking away as if he couldn’t bring himself to look at the other.
“What’s that like?” Rune-emi, on the other hand, maintained one-sided eye contact.
“What’s what like?”
“Having an older sibling. I’ve always wondered.”
“Oh,” The Gloomy Boy started, “well it’s…something.” He tried to think of something interesting, or at least something funny, to say. “I mean, it’s a pain in the ass a lot of the time. But there’s good moments, you know?” He said.
“Well yeah, I’d figure that. I mean what’s it like having an older sibling.” He put more emphasis on the “older” part this time.
“Oh–Yeah.” This time it was easier to answer. “She’s a very determined person, when she sets her mind to something she just does it. And she always perfects whatever it is she’s doing. She once told me that she doesn’t want to finish anything short from her best. I’m not like that, though.” He sighed. “I guess you probably think I look up to her, being her younger brother and all. But, honestly, she’s kinda just there. You know?”
“What? You don’t have a close relationship with her?” Rune-emi eyebrows furrowed in confusion.
“I mean, we talk. Like, a couple times a week. Actually earlier–like last night or something–She randomly came in my room and we just chatted for a bit.”
Rune-emi looked away for a slight second to open his pretzel bag, and looked right back at the other. “But, would you guys say you trust each other? With secrets, and stuff.”
The Gloomy Boy sat and thought for a second. “Hmm, not really. It’s not like I have deep dark secrets, but I probably wouldn’t tell her. Although, she does know more than I’d like about my personal life.”
“What does that mean?” Rune-emi stacked three pretzel sticks together and bit them all at once.
“It’s not too big of a deal, but I just kinda regret her knowing things about me, yeah? Sometimes when she brings up certain things I wish she’d just, you know, leave me alone. Not bother me about it again. I get pretty depressed when she does.”
While The Gloomy Boy didn’t necessarily think too hard of his words, he hadn’t thought that they would be, in some way, offensive.
“She’s your only sibling.” Rune-emi said rather sternly.
“Well,” The Gloomy Boy stuttered, “I know that–obviously.”
“I know my siblings are on the younger side, so there’s some things I can’t really talk about with them yet, but I do my best to be close to them.” Rune-emi lifted up another pretzel. “You don’t know how long you’ve got with your older sister. Anything could happen. One night you guys could be watching a TV show together, and the next morning she might not wake up.” He was starting to get pretty angered. “Family isn’t something to joke around about, you know.”
The Gloomy Boy felt awful. Obviously he appreciated his sister subconsciously, but he never thought of it like that. It made him wonder why Rune-emi got so worked up over a conversation meant to be small-talk.
“I know.” He said. “You can’t force it, though. Can you?” The Gloomy Boy attempted at a chuckle, but he was way too anxious to succeed.
“She’s your older sister for crying out loud.” There he went with the dramatic emphasis on a singular word. “I bet you she’s doing everything she can to keep you safe.”
“Well I don’t know about ‘keeping me safe.’ We don’t have much to worry about, honestly.” At this point, The Gloomy Boy felt like dozens of knives were at his throat, aiming for the kill.
“Oh,” Rune-emi shut off. “Right.” He dropped his pretzel bag down onto his tray, and cracked his knuckles.
“Is something wrong?” The Gloomy Boy fearfully inquired. “You seem upset.”
“No,” Rune-emi abruptly stated, waving his hand as a send-off, “I’m fine. Let’s switch topics, yeah?” He rested his elbows on the table.
If you were to ask The Gloomy Boy what the two had talked about afterwards, he wouldn’t know how to answer. He felt like he did something, said something, wrong, and he was determined to figure out what. He was not about to lose the first genuine friend he’s made since Sabito.
“Rune-emi,” he asked. The Gloomy Boy internally smiled when he had recognized the nickname.
“Yeah?” Rune-emi answered in a melancholic tone.
“Did I say something to upset you? You seem kind of off. I guess. I don’t know, just a feeling.” Good lord was this guy terrible at confrontation. Like many guys.
“Oh no, you’re fine.”
Confused that the first attempt hadn’t worked, The Gloomy Boy struggled to find other ways to continue.
“You sure?” He pushed.
“Yes, yes. I’m just tired.” Rune-emi looked away.
“Okay, but are you su–”
“Yes dude.” It was clear that there would be no more prying. Well, if you could read even a line of the room.
“I just don’t think you’re acting normal–”
“Oh good lord, okay. I’m just kinda ticked off that you aren’t close with your sister.” He finally admitted.
The Gloomy Boy looked confused, and questioned the reason.
To which Rune-emi replied, “It’s not you specifically. It’s anytime I see anyone not getting along with a family member. Especially one that so obviously cares. I mean, come on,” Rune-emi’s pace in his words quickened, passionately infuriated of such a normalized concept. “I see so many people hate on, pick at, make fun of, and so much more of their younger siblings. Even their older ones. I get jokes, seriously, I make them all the time. But, there’s a line, you know? When you say you ‘regret’ having your older sister know things, I just can’t imagine what she feels about it. What if she was happy she was able to share that part of your life with you? Not even just share,” Rune-emi looked started flailing with his arms, “just simply be able to know something about you.” The Gloomy Boy had quite a hard time trying not to be freak out. It wasn’t often someone would argue with him.
“If you spend your whole time thinking, ‘no, I’ll regret telling her,’ or, ‘she won’t get it anyway,’ then how will you ever build that trust–that necessary trust–that so many lack? A parent is one thing. A sibling. A sister, is another.”
The Gloomy Boy showed his sympathetic face, concerned and yet admiring the nature of the boy right next to him. He would have asked what made him believe the things he said, but even for The Gloomy Boy it was understood that the conversation had to be flipped.
So there they were, two boys spending their lunch together in the further ends of the cafeteria.
One that only had to accept a reaching hand, and another that yearned for the chance.