Chapter Text
Fyodor wakes up to a cool breeze slapping against his face.
"...Nng..." he groans as he rolls over on the bed, before realising he isn't on a bed and is instead on the floor. Well, that explained his back pain.
He sits up, rubbing his back as his eyes struggle to blearily look up at the bed next to him. That Dazai stole the blanket... and kicked him off too!
Fyodor climbs back up onto the bed, trying to peel the blanket off Dazai. The brunette is in a blanket burrito. How did he get himself tangled in the blanket so tightly while asleep!? Dazai is certainly testing his patience, and Fyodor isn't very patient in the morning, much less the break of dawn.
Fyodor is unable to get the blanket free from Dazai's grip. He's drooling in his sleep and looks so peaceful. Fyodor huffs at the sight, before glancing at the window, which was open! It's winter and Dazai still opened the window? Fyodor never dealt with the cold well. He slams the window shut with a bit too much force before snatching the blanket away from Dazai. This action makes him stir, stretching out limbs in a star shape before his eyes flutter open. "Fyo...dor...?"
"You stole the blanket." Fyodor says pointedly. Dazai can't help but notice a small pout on his face and he giggles, before realising he should be angry at how Fyodor woke him up and stole the blanket back. "Gimme back the blanket!" he whines, jolting up and grabbing the hem of it. Fyodor doesn't relent. Dazai's stronger in terms of physical strength, but he's half-asleep right now and Fyodor is much more awake than he is, so it's quite the fair fight.
"You kicked me off the bed, you buffoon!" Fyodor exclaims as they play a game of tug-of-war with the blanket. "And you opened the window too!"
"Um, it was super hot last night!" Dazai retorts, pulling at the blanket with all the force his groggy self could muster at that moment. "Don't blame me, blame yourself! You're always too cold!"
"It's winter, are you kidding?" Fyodor complains back, before Dazai suddenly musters up enough strength to pull the blanket toward himself. Fyodor chokes back a yelp as he ends up on top of Dazai. "...I'm wide awake now all because of you, Osamu."
"It's Dazai-kun for you now!" The brunette pouts. "And I win." He pulls the blanket closer to himself, trying to pull it around his shoulders. Fyodor nips at his ear and presses his lips softly against Dazai's, earning a gasp and making his grasp on the blanket loosen, and Fyodor then grabs the blanket from him with a single clean swipe.
"No fair! You can't do that, that's abusing kisses!" Dazai complains again. He's always whining about one thing or another. Fyodor smirks triumphantly, and all Dazai wants at that moment is to smear that look right off his face.
"I'll go to sleep now, thank you." Fyodor concluded, rolling over with the blanket around him. Dazai lets out an annoyed groan, pulling himself over to the raven. "You're impossible!"
"It's five o'clock, now let me sleep, Dazai-kun." "Isn't it supposed to be Osamu?" "You said otherwise just a few moments ago."
Dazai pouts again at that. "I said that in the heat of the moment... you don't actually have to call me that. Osamu is fine, okay?"
"I know, I'm just teasing, Osamu." "Ugh! Wait—at least share the blanket, you prick!"
— • —
"Fyodor, Fyodor," he hears his name being called over and over again as he comes to, waking up and finding Dazai's face above.
"Yes, dear, what's wrong?" Fyodor mumbles out, about to sit up but Dazai quickly stops him with a firm hand. "No sitting."
"...Oh? Why so?" Fyodor asks, which is followed by a "You're sick, dumb***!"
"Language..." he sighs as he relaxes against Dazai's body. "Oh. Wait. I'm ill?"
"Yep." Dazai confirms, pressing his palm against Fyodor's warm forehead. "You're burning."
"Quite the over-exaggeration there," Fyodor laughs quietly, nuzzling his cheek against Dazai's thigh. "I'll be alright, Osamu—there's no need to worry about me, though I appreciate the concern."
"Don't get all polite with me." Dazai crosses his arms. "You're sick so you're staying home and resting, hear me?"
"...But I have to go out today–" "I don't wanna hear it!"
Fyodor sighs at that. "So you expect me to simply remain in bed and do nothing all day?" "Yes, that's exactly what I'm telling you to do."
"Alright then, dear, if that's what pleases you." he finally surrenders. "Will you feed me, then? I'd rather not face the nightmare of your cooking today."
"Okay, rude," Dazai huffs. "I'll order takeout, 'kay? Now just lie down and do nothing. Actually, maybe cuddle me too." He settles down on the bed next to Fyodor and wraps arms around his cold body. "Woah, you're shivering."
"Am I?" Fyodor's surprised. He didn't notice that. Maybe he really does neglect himself then... "You're not exaggerating it again, are you?"
"You think everything I say is an exaggeration, but what I say really is true, Fyodor." "Right, of course..."
Fyodor lets himself melt into the hug, returning it as he puts his hands on Dazai's waist. "You're warm now."
"Well, that blanket tug-of-war adventure had me sweating! And got you sick, too." Dazai replies, squeezing Fyodor. He squirms before slowly relaxing.
After a few minutes of cosiness, Dazai reluctantly pulls away and stands up. "Where are you going?" Fyodor asks, but he never receives an answer. Dazai comes back after a minute with a bottle of pills. "Medicine time!"
He's too cheerful for what Fyodor's feeling. He dreads medicine. It's too bitter and makes him feel nauseous and weird. "Ugh, no..."
Dazai playfully smacks his shoulder, popping the bottle cap open and pouring out two pills. "C'mon, Fyodor! Don't be such a scaredy-cat, you're supposed to be the great Demon Fyodor, right?"
"Don't wanna..." "Wow, now you're just acting like me."
Dazai thinks for a moment. How can he get this stubborn terrorist to take his medicine? The answer hits him like Truck-kun and he slips one pill into his mouth. Fyodor's confused for a moment before Dazai smashes his lips against his. Fyodor squirms as Dazai bites down on his bottom lip to open his mouth before letting the pill enter Fyodor's, landing on his tongue, before Dazai pulls away. Fyodor is breathless and glares at Dazai before he swallows the pill dry. "What was that for, dear?"
"You didn't wanna take your meds, so I had to make you, simple!" Dazai winks. "Want me to do it for the next one too?" He asks, holding up the second pill. Fyodor groans again and snatches the pill away from him, his ears flushed, before muttering out "I can do it myself, thank you..."
Frankly, Fyodor wants him to kiss him again, but he doesn't want to say it out loud, so he simply reluctantly puts the pill in his mouth as he winces at the bitter taste, swallowing it dry again. Dazai tackles him onto the bed and kisses his cheeks with quick pecks. Fyodor hears himself let out small laughs between kisses. He grabs Dazai's collar to stop him before kissing his forehead. Dazai's cheeks flush and he flops down on top of him which makes Fyodor choke and mumble out something about being sick as Dazai screams into Fyodor's neck with fluster. "Warn me before you pull a stunt like that!!"
When Fyodor calms down, Dazai hasn't. "I'm not sorry, dear." "Rude!"
"...But I love you." Both of them say in unison with different tones and volumes, but at the same time, they both mean the same thing as they lie there huddled together, safe from the howling wind outside.
How disgustingly sweet.