Chapter Text
Izuku is woken up the next day by the rays of sunlight peeking through his blinds. He props himself on his elbows, squinting at the change in brightness when a sharp pain shoots through his head. He clutches at it to stabilize himself, groaning in pain.
Headaches sucked.
Dragging himself out of bed, his muscles stiffen up and he nearly buckles over, saving himself by grabbing onto the headboard before his knees give out. Fuck, running the whole length of Kirishima's house to the bus stop had made his body sore all over. He'd definitely overexerted himself.
He pulled out his phone to check his texts and was bombarded with unread messages sent by Iida and Uraraka, asking where he was and if he was okay. He felt like a complete bum for having not responded to his friends who had clearly been worried about him. He quickly typed out a message apologizing for having not told them, saying he'd felt sick and had thus excused himself early.
He robotically readied himself for class, chugging down a cup of black coffee, no sugar to keep himself going. Izuku hated coffee, he hated black coffee even more, yet forced himself to drink every drop of it in hopes of reducing the throbbing pain in his head that now seemed to be migrating all over. He managed to sit through his 3 lectures for the day through sheer willpower and caffeine, eyes red from how much he'd rubbed them to stay awake. Heading out of class with his hoodie on and zipped, and shoulders slouched in exhaustion, he noticed a crowd gathered at the front of the campus.
Was there an event going on that Izuku wasn't aware of? Or did the entire campus collectively decide to just gather in a throng? Anyways he was too tired to deal with any of this, he just wanted to go back to his dorm and sleep. Just as he was about to turn around and leave, his phone began ringing. Checking the caller ID, he picked up. "Hey Uraraka,"
"Izuku please tell me you've signed up for a club already," she said, skipping the greetings.
"Uh, no I haven't. Why?"
"Izuku.." her voice chimed from the other end of the line, "You'd better sign up right fucking now. It's the last day and if you don't head fast enough, all the seats in your astronomy club are going to get over."
"WHAT?!" Izuku spat out, "'kay I'll head there right now… see you later, bye,"
The call ended and Izuku bolted towards the yard with a sense of urgency, throwing himself into the crowd of people, and heading to the sign up counter. How could he have forgotten to sign up? He banged his head internally, berating himself for his own forgetfulness. He'd been so excited to join the astronomy club and make friends who shared his passion, learn more about space and use the university's sophisticated instruments to do sophisticated space stuff.
Damn him for being late, he prayed there were still seats left.
"Hello…Uh could I get a—" Before Izuku could finish his sentence a paper was thrust into his hands by a woman who immediately turned away to continue doing the same to the other students crowded around the sign up counter.
Alright, he held the pen in hands still trembling from the adrenaline of his run. His vision blurred as the blinding sunlight overheated his body, he could feel his throbbing pulse in his head. Was that normal? Or was he so out of shape that a small run was going to be the cause of his death? Izuku brushed away his discomfort and began quickly filling in his details so he could finally head back to his dorms for a well deserved nap.
Turning in the club application form, he headed back to his dorm, throwing himself onto the bed upon reaching. He buried himself in the soft cotton comforter, body slicked in a layer of sweat that was now drying down into a salty sticky mess. Still, he didn't bother changing out of his clothes, he didn't want to move, more like he couldn't move; it was like his muscles had melted into putty and fused with the fibers of his bedsheet.
He woke up hours later to the sound of his roommate returning from the gym. Rubbing sleep out of his eyes he got out of bed, stretching his sore muscles feeling much better than he did earlier. He opened his phone, squinting at the sudden assault by the bright light. Pulling up his mail inbox he began mindlessly scrolling through his unread mails when his eyes caught onto one titled 'Club confirmation'. He straightened his back, sitting upright and opened it,
Dear Izuku Midoriya,
This email confirms your presence in UA university's American Sign Language (ASL) club. We look forward to your active participation in the club and its activities as a proactive member of society aiding towards making life more inclusive for disabled people. We appreciate your participation.
Regards,
ASL Club President
Andrew White
ASL? The fuck? He signed up for the Astronomy club so why did this mail say ASL? It had to be a mistake. Or perhaps the Astronomy club had run out of seats and so he'd been relegated to the ASL club? No. He was not spending the rest of his semester learning sign language of all things. He quickly drafted and sent an email to the management, asking them to look into the seeming allotment error and turned off his phone.
Tomorrow he'd wake up to a reply stating they were sorry for their mistake and Izuku was supposed to be in the Astronomy club and his seat would be confirmed. He took a deep breath to reassure himself and went on with his day.
To Izuku's disappointment all he got the next day was a solemn reply stating there was no error and he had signed up for the ASL club, adding onto that stating club changes weren't possible after seat confirmation.
Yeah, this had to be a joke.
He scrolled down to find an attached scan of his sign up form and read through it.
Fucking hell.
Izuku zoomed in on the little checkbox next to the ASL option, staring at the tick as if it'd personally offended him. He yanked his hair in frustration as right below the ASL option was, as one could guess, Astronomy.
So basically, Izuku had in his exhaustion mixed up the two and selected ASL instead of Astronomy.
Great.
Now he'd be learning hand signs the entire semester.
Trying his best not to feel too bummed about his predicament, Izuku headed to the ASL club's first meeting. Glancing at the door ahead of him, and then at the phone gripped in his hand, he read the mail again, Room B—1. Izuku walked in, the first thing catching his attention being the scanty amount of people seated in the room. 12 people sat scattered across the 4 corners of the room. Relief washed over him as he recognized a few familiar faces, Kirishima, the redhead from the party, and the girl sitting next to him with bubblegum pink hair, Mina Ashido, he recalled.
Izuku stood at the doorway, hand gripping the strap of his bag as he contemplated sitting next to them. While he didn't want to sit alone in a place so foreign, it felt awkward just walking up and sitting next to people he'd only met once. Maybe they had other friends coming and he'd just end up taking their seat or intruding on them.
Yeah, he was definitely overthinking this. Letting out a soft sigh he took a seat in the far end of the classroom, at the edge of the wall.
Mere moments later, the door to the club room swung open and a man with auburn hair walked in.
"Alrighty! Good morning everyone. I'm Andrew White, your club president and this is Kats—" He said pointing to the empty spot on his right,
"Uh, Hold on…YO, KATSUKI—".
"Yeah I'm here," A voice grumbled out as a man walked in gripping a stack of heavy books which he planted onto the table with a grunt.
Izuku let out a deep sigh taking in, once again, the person in front of him. It was almost as if the universe was dead set on not letting him escape his past, escape Bakugou. He wondered if this was karma for something he'd done in a past life, or maybe he was cursed. Thankfully, the initial shock of seeing the other had worn off, so finally, he was no longer a hyperventilating mess at the sight of blonde hair.
Katsuki Bakugou was in the ASL club.
Well, it did make more sense for him to be here than Izuku, afterall, Bakugou was deaf.
"So this is your vice president, Katsuki Bakugou. Welcome to the ASL club," Andrew pointed towards Bakugou, earning a quick nod of acknowledgement from him.
"I would like to begin this first meeting with a question. How many people here know ASL?" Andrew questioned with an expectant look on his face. To his disappointment, only two hands were raised, Kirishima and another girl.
"Andy, you expect too much. People join this club for 2 reasons," Bakugou looked up from his place where he'd been organizing the books he'd carried in, "either they missed the registration deadline, or they wanted a club without too much work,"
"Hey man, don't leave out the people who joined so that they could focus on the Basketball team instead," Kirishima added, sounding offended at Bakugou's lack of inclusion.
"Oh, well of course. How could I have forgotten?" He replied, rolling his eyes, earning giggles from the pink haired girl sitting next to Kirishima. "Awh, c'mon Mina, don't laugh too hard. You only joined 'cause your boyfriend is here," He teased, rolling the 'r' in 'boyfriend'.
"Guys, stop." Andrew finally spoke up, "That's what the club's for. Don't listen to my partner here, he can be a bit grumpy. I'll help you all on your journey to learn ASL," He chirped out, clapping his hands in excitement as Bakugou worked on opening up a Powerpoint presentation on the board in the middle of the club room.
Izuku awkwardly sat through Andrew's speech knowing whatever Bakugou said was true, at least for him.
The class shuffled through the slides, as everybody in the room began learning new signs that meant different things. They began with letters, moving onto days of the week and some simple colors. Bakugou and Andrew were good teachers, helping others learn and correcting them when needed.
The slide changed and Izuku looked up at the board, focused on recreating the gesture displayed with his own hands. They'd now moved onto basic greetings and phrases, and they were much harder to sign than colors and numbers. "Friend", he signed, touching the tips of his pointer fingers.
"You're doing it wrong," A smooth voice sounded next to his ear, sending a shiver down his spine. A hand grabbed his from behind, and corrected his sign. The opposite tips of his pointer fingers now touched.
Izuku's sensory system was overloading, there was too much happening at the same time. Izuku didn't need to turn around to confirm that the person behind him was Bakugou, he just knew.
Too close. Too much.
Bakugou was saying something, Izuku could tell from the rush of warm air he could feel over the tips of his ears and long, blonde hair caressing his nape. He could hear the faint sound of his voice but it sounded more like white noise. He couldn't discern a single word coming from the other's mouth. Not when he could focus on nothing but the feeling of Bakugou's hand on his own. Not even in his wildest dreams had he imagined that there'd be a day where Bakugou would be so close to him, touching him.
"Midoriya,"
"Midoriya… Are you listening?"
Izuku snapped back, "Uh, yeah, so—"
"Did you hear a word of what I said?"
"...No?"
"God," Bakugou muttered out, rolling his eyes. "Let's go over this again, do it like this…"
He did it right this time.
"Finally…"
Finally? Did Bakugou seriously just say finally? Hey, these signs weren't that easy to learn, the least he could be was considerate towards someone clearly trying their best, Izuku couldn't help the mild annoyance he felt at Bakugou's response.
About an hour later, the meeting ended and before everyone could leave, Andrew clapped his hands together, grabbing everyone's attention and spoke.
"That's it for today's lesson, frankly I wasn't expecting to have this many beginners in our lesson today but it is what it is. Bakugou will be distributing these textbooks to you that you can use to learn more signs."
Bakugou stepped forward, placing one book from the pile in front of each person.
"I'd suggest learning up to page 30 at least, because in the next 3 weeks we'll have our first ever event coming up,"
"We've been invited to host an ASL workshop at the Musutafu Elementary school and will be teaching the 1st and 2nd graders. I know it sounds difficult but learning the basics will suffice for it."
Well, shit. Like it wasn't bad enough that he was struggling with basic signs, but now he'd have to teach them to others? Yeah, he was screwed.
And so Izuku spent the next three weeks learning more signs and phrases, not because he wanted to, but more so because his fear of embarrassing himself in front of everyone far exceeded his annoyance at his lack of skill at ASL. Slowly but steadily, his skills evolved to the point where he could finally hold a basic conversation in ASL. It wasn't easy at all though, learning the signs was only half the equation, the harder part was memorizing them and remembering to add the corresponding facial expressions so his signs matched the way he felt. With every new sign he learnt he felt a growing sympathy and respect for people who used ASL to communicate in their day to day lives.
As the day of the event approached he felt more and more ready to finally display his skills and prove to Bakugou—
Prove to Bakugou? Prove what? No. He didn't need to prove anything to him. Yeah he was doing this because he wanted to prove to himself that he could learn ASL, that he wasn't dumb, stupid, incompetent, useless, deku.
So Izuku worked his ass off, memorizing signs in whatever spare time he found and 3 weeks later, had finally gotten to the point where he could hold a simple conversation in ASL. He was proud of himself, more so for having done it without any assistance.
The day of the event arrived and all went well. They spent an hour teaching elementary schoolers how to sign letters and days of the week in ASL. Well, it was mostly Andrew and Bakugou doing the teaching, while everyone else helped correct the children. After the teaching portion of the workshop was over, they spent the remainder of their time simply playing and chatting with the children.
Izuku found himself having a wonderful time, although he'd initially been nervous for how everything would go with such a rag tag team of volunteers but his worries were for nothing. Aside from Bakugou having scared a few children and calling them brats of course. Andrew and Bakugou had handled everything.
Izuku had just finished playing with some of the children on the swings when he noticed Bakugou kneeled on the playground, talking to a little girl. She couldn't have been older than 6 years old, wearing pigtails and pink glasses. Izuku would've ignored this, everybody was talking and interacting with the children after all but the expression Bakugou wore intrigued him.
Eyes soft with compassion and empathy as he held the girl's little hands in his own, his characteristic scowl nowhere to be seen, replaced by what by Bakugou's standards would be considered a smile. A soft one. Izuku was taken aback. He didn't know Bakugou was capable of such an expression.
Had you told little Izuku that the person in front of him was the same Bakugou who'd made his life a living hell all those years ago he'd have called you a liar. Bakugou never looked at anyone like that, not even Izuku.
Izuku believed for a second that perhaps the person in front of him wasn't Bakugou but was an identical doppelganger. There was a saying that said there exist at least 7 people in the world who look exactly like you, maybe this person was one of them.
But Izuku knew better, he could recognize those eyes that haunted him even in his sleep. All of Bakugou had changed except his eyes, which still held the same hardness, now softened at the edges.
"Mr. Bakugou, are you deaf like me?"
Izuku saw the little girl sign. All those days he'd spent learning ASL had really paid off, he could understand what the girl was saying. He knew it was rude to intrude on their conversation but he was captivated by the interaction.
"Yes, I am," He saw Bakugou sign back.
"I was born like this, what about you?"
"I could hear when I was younger. I lost my hearing in an accident during high school,"
"That must've been so scary for you. I always thought I was strange for being different but now I know there are more people like me. I hope when I grow up I can also be as cool as you!"
"As cool as me? Tch, never." Bakugou dramatically gestured.
"You'll be cooler."
The little girl hugged Bakugou while giggling and Izuku felt a strange warm feeling in his chest, unlike anything he'd ever experienced. Bakugou had changed. Just as he was about to leave he felt an arm on his shoulder.
"Katsuki's pretty awesome, don't you think?" Andrew said, slinging an arm across Izuku's shoulder. Izuku immediately felt a strong urge to shove his arm off and run away, but ignoring it he stayed put.
"Yeah, he is," Seeing this interaction had stirred up another feeling within him, resentment. Deep rooted resentment. Now he knew that Katsuki hadn't treated Izuku like gum under his shoe because he was 'just like that', he was capable of being nice, Izuku had just seen it.
Bakugou hated Izuku.
That was the only plausible explanation for his behavior.
Why? Why did he hate Izuku so much? He wanted to know. Izuku had been nothing but nice to him so what had he done to earn the other's wrath.
"We've only been friends for a few months and yet I can't help but admire his strength." Andrew added on, breaking Izuku out his trance. He'd almost forgotten the other man was still standing right next to him.
"Yeah."
After wrapping up the event, as a reward for their success, the group decided to head out for fried chicken and beer at a Korean restaurant nearby. Everyone was having fun eating and drinking, conversations were flowing smoothly and Izuku too, found himself enjoying the unlikely company of the other members of the ASL club. While he was still upset about not getting a seat in the Astronomy club, he wasn't too bummed about being in the ASL club either, it wasn't too bad.
Izuku laughed along with the group as Kirishima made his 'beer bombs', most of which were drunk by Katsuki. On that note, Izuku had noticed that Bakugou seemed to be drinking tonight. A lot. He'd drunk 5 cans of beer and God knows how many of those beer bombs contained soju. Had it not been for the violent flush now covering his face, Izuku wouldn't have been able to tell Katsuki was drunk.
Izuku decided to head out for a smoke and some air. He lit the cigarette and took in a long, deep drag, smoke filling his lungs. He exhaled letting it out, feeling the calm wash over him. He'd only recently picked up smoking after trying one for fun on his 18th birthday. He didn't smoke often but noticed that it helped him reduce anxiety and calm his nerves.
"Hey Deku, didn't know you smoked."
Izuku's ears perked up at the use of that name
Deku.
It had to be Katsuki. There wasn't a single soul in the world other than him who called Izuku that.
"Well, people change," Izuku said, taking another drag. He didn't really know what he was saying. He just wanted to sound nonchalant and cool. The last thing he needed Bakugou to know was that his heart was beating so loud it felt like it would explode any minute.
"Yeah? Well then you must be pretty happy to see me again,"
Izuku turned around, finally meeting Bakugou's eyes.
"You must be fucking elated to see me all deaf and useless."
"Maybe you think it's karma for the way I treated you," He laughed, but it sounded more like a choke.
What was Bakugou on about? Elated? Karma? There he was once again, drawing up his own conclusions about what Izuku thought without ever talking to him. How dare he say such things when he was the one who'd left without saying goodbye. And for his information, Izuku wasn't glad about Bakugou's loss of hearing because, well why would he be?
"Why would you even think that? What are you even saying?" Izuku replied, tone carrying all the years of anger, hatred, concern and hurt that he'd buried deep within himself for years.
"Stop lying,"
Bakugou stood, fists clenched at his sides, gaze glued onto the ground. "Stop. Lying. You hate me."
"No, I don't?" Izuku was now more confused than anything why he was acting so strange.
"Yes, yes you do and stop fucking denying it it's pissing me off."
And before Izuku could get another word in he stormed off, walking into the restaurant, leaving Izuku behind. Again. Izuku was just about to follow along when Kirishima stepped out from behind the alleyway, a sheepish smile plastered across his face.
"Yeah, so I totally didn't mean to intrude on your uh—convo, if I could call it that."
"Oh God. Did you hear everything?" Izuku felt his cheeks flush in humiliation.
"Kinda.." He admitted. "Hey, Midoriya. You've been friends with Kats since Highschool haven't you?"
"Yeah, I have."
"Well, then you must know how Bakugou lost his hearing, right? Y'know, since y'all went to high school together and stuff,"
No. Izuku did not know how Bakugou lost his hearing. Matter of fact he didn't know anything about the other at all. Still, it felt embarrassing to tell him no for some reason, so instead Izuku chose to stay quiet.
Kirishima broke out laughing as Izuku stood there in silence. He simply stared at the other for the next few minutes as he laughed his heart out at god knows what. Had it been anyone else in Izuku's position they would've immediately thought he was a lunatic. His laughter soon died down and now he looked at Izuku in shock? These past few days had been a barrage of too much confusion and not enough answers. Izuku needed answers right now.
"Damn, you really don't know anything," He muttered out. And once again, before Izuku could question him, he also walked off. People needed to stop walking off before Izuku got answers to his question. ASAP.
He sat through the entire bus ride back to UA, mind clouded with questions and an existential sense that he was missing out on information that was kept out of reach of him and only him. Upon reaching back to his dorms his mother called him and he picked up.
"Hello, Izuku. How's uni treating you?" His mother's sweet voice sounded from the other end of the line.
"Great," He replied feeling much more relaxed upon hearing his mother's voice. Uni was the first time he'd stayed away from his mom for so long, he missed her dearly.
"How was your workshop today? I hope everything went well." On hearing this question Izuku felt a sudden urge to tell his mother everything. Everything that had happened in his life the past few days.
And so he did. He told her everything; about meeting Bakugou again, joining the ASL club and the workshop. He conveniently left out the slightly… raunchy parts, his mother didn't need to know all that.
"Zuku darling......I—I don't know how to tell you this. Please forgive me for not saying earlier I thought you knew. I really did. I didn't bring it up for it'd be a rather uncomfortable topic for us to talk about but I definitely would've had I known you didn't know. I thought Katsuki or Mitsuki would've told you I—"
"Mom. Is everything alright?"
"I— Izuku honey, Katsuki tried c—committing… in high school. He lost his hearing when he jumped out of his window."
Izuku felt the blood from his body drain. Committing. Jumped. Suicide.
What? Why?
"I—I didn't know, mom. H—How do you know this?"
"Mitsuki told me, I held her in my arms as she cried in the ER that night. I even visited Katsuki in the hospital. I asked him if he wanted to see you but he refused. I assumed that he didn't want you to see him in such a state and left it at that."
"I didn't know that Katsuki never told you at all… Izuku? Honey? Say something,"
"Huh? Oh, uh… yeah. It's just… A lot to process."
"Mom, I'll talk to you tomorrow. I—I want to sleep." Izuku said, gripping the phone to his ear so tight his knuckles paled.
"Zuku… I understand. Take care, alright? I love you."
"Love you, too,"
Beep.