Chapter Text
Most would’ve thrown the towel in by now. But as already established, Derek was not like most people. He loved a good puzzle or challenge. Even if that meant figuring out how to house an alien life form in his small studio apartment.
After Derek had woken up after his first sleep, he immediately needed to use the bathroom. He thought he was in the clear until the Mayo had followed him and had tried to slime its way beneath the door, repeating his name over and over.
After that horrifying experience, Derek had to explain the concept of privacy. The Mayo was obviously still confused, clearly not even understanding the concept of a human bathroom. Derek put on a potty training video for toddlers because he had just woken up and was not in the mood to explain that.
That led to the Mayo asking where the waste in their bodies came from, which Derek was easily able to explain the concept of eating. The Mayo proudly spoke of how it eats as well, and then did not elaborate. Derek didn’t mind since he had just woken up, still processing how this all wasn’t a fever dream and how he needed to figure out a way to seal the bottom of the bathroom door from any prying aliens.
So now with an aching back he started to make himself some breakfast to start another round of ‘monitoring the Mayo.’
After finishing making just two simple eggs Derek moved to the living room to sit beside the Mayo on the couch and his food on the coffee table.
“Are you eating, Derek?” The Mayo seemed to now have just as many questions as Derek did all of the time. It had moved on from only using simple phrases to being able to fully ask questions in simple English.
“Yes.” Derek took a bite of his egg without looking away from the Youtube video that the slime had been watching. It was some sort of drawing tutorial.
“I will eat too, then.” The Mayo moved faster than Derek could, morphing into a humanoid form before looking like an exact replica of Derek, just in green jello form. It too moved to take a bite of Derek’s eggs.
Thankfully despite his utter shock, Derek was able to rescue his plate away from the now five-finger grasp of the alien.
“Woah!- Get your own food.” Derek said, now standing up and away from the creature. “Also…stop doing that.” There was a vague hand gesture made towards the Mayo, referring to its current form.
“You don’t like and subscribe? I can eat like you now, Derek.” The Mayo almost sounded a bit hurt. It also looks like the creature had now misinterpreted what ‘like and subscribe’ meant. No doubt due to the amount of times it was repeated in the hours of content the creature had consumed.
“It’s interesting…sure. But I’ll make you some eggs. And look like someone else, not me…it’s creepy.” Derek had whispered that last part, not wanting to offend. Even though the Mayo likely had no idea what the descriptor ‘creepy’ meant yet.
“Someone…else? Not Derek?” The Mayo pondered in silence, moving to rest its mimicked hand on its chin; like how Derek does when he is deep in thought about something too. It was clear that the Mayo was at least very observant, already cloning Derek and repeating his exact same quirks and habits.
It was a little scary to think how easily it had copied Derek completely. Not that he would admit that. Instead he continued the conversation, putting his plate of food back down on the coffee table.
“Yeah. Not like Derek. Look different. I’ll make you food too.”
“Really? Mayo would like and subscribe that, Derek.” The slime wiggled around, still mimicking Derek’s looks. It was a bit creepy to see his own smile from an outsider’s perspective.
“Yes. Now change how you look.” Pushing himself off the couch, Derek went back to the kitchen to make more eggs. He still wasn’t sure exactly what the diet of an extraterrestrial being consisted of.
“Okay, Derek.” The slime responded, its body morphing around to appear like a different human. It still had arms and legs, but for some reason it decided to have a tail as well. On top of that, it gave itself the classic alien antennas and a rounder-looking face. It was now a tad taller and chubbier than Derek’s lanky build; essentially it just looked like a classic human with alien appendages. Of course, all the while being neon green and transparent. Derek was just happy it wasn’t the spitting image of himself anymore. Although it seems the alien neglected to remain in jelly clothes.
Derek wasn’t really sure how he felt about it retaining a humanoid shape but not wearing anything to exactly cover its…just smooth transparent jelly body. A heavy sigh escaped him, debating on giving up an outfit to cover the newly formed humanoid. It's not like it needed clothes to cover anything. Its body was kind of like a doll’s body, no detailed anatomy but it still felt wrong just to see it naked.
He finished making the eggs for the creature, turning away from the stove only to witness it eating the plate he had left on the coffee table. It was quite an odd sight.
The creature had no fork to pick the sunny-side up eggs with, so instead it completely face planted on top of the plate and the surrounding coffee table. Derek watched with fascination as whenever the eggs and the plate entered past what was considered the ‘skin’ level of slime, it all began to dissolve and make its way down to where its ‘stomach’ should be.
Interesting. Derek would need to note this development somewhere. He eternally cursed himself, realizing he should’ve been writing down the strangeness of the organism this entire time. After mentally kicking himself he realized that one of his favorite (and only) plates was actively still dissolving inside the alien life form.
“Hey! I said I would make you a plate.” Derek slightly raised his voice past his usual monotone to express his disappointment in the creature.
“I know. I eat like Derek. See?” The creature seemed to have startled after initially being called out. It then moved off the couch while removing its face from where it was stuck to the coffee table. The sound was wet as the slime separated its face from the wood. It then proudly displayed the dissolving eggs and plate inside, where a normal human stomach would be. The sight itself was both disgusting and intriguing to Derek.
“I can’t do this.” The man ran a hand down his face, as if trying to wipe away the sight he had just witnessed. He scarfed down the eggs he had originally made for the slime creature in disgruntled silence at the kitchen counter. Now knowing it could not be trusted with food around.
It was sort of nice to have an idea as to where the creature was looking now. It had a human adjacent head now. Having a pair of eyes that simply watched Derek eat with a huge, dopey grin. The only gripe he had now was that it seemed the slime always had a staring problem that wasn’t evident until it conformed to look a bit more human.
As soon as Derek finished, he put his plate in the sink and silently went to his room, the Mayo following behind. It was strange how with two legs it now kept up with him very well as opposed to the sludging along it previously did.
“You can’t come into my room. Just wait here.” Derek signaled to the alien to stand in one corner of the small hallway. He was still a bit miffed about losing a plate to the slime’s dissolving digestive track, if you could even call it that.
“Okay, Derek.” The smile on the Mayo’s face never left. It seemed to be content just being acknowledged by the other.
“Also, you don’t need to say my name after every sentence.” It was getting a bit repetitive to Derek, also it allowed him to note that perhaps he should’ve taught the slime one of the four other languages he knows first. His mom would be furious to know Derek didn’t immediately introduce his ‘guest’ to his mother tongue of German.
“Okay, D-Dude.” The Mayo had corrected itself in the middle of repeating Derek’s name, instead opting to use a phrase it had heard frequently from various YouTubers. The creature assumed that was the correct usage of the word since Derek didn’t further comment on it; disappearing into his room.
Derek was currently doing his best to find an outfit he wouldn’t miss wearing, because there was no way in hell he’d wear these clothes again after some unknown life form had. He finally decided on a worn graphic robotics t-shirt and a pair of grey shorts that had been stubbornly stained with oil and tea from his days in the workshop. It would do after all, his only goal was just to cover the alien to make himself feel a bit more comfortable.
After Derek emerged from his room with the clothes he decided to graciously lend, he found the Mayo with one of the hallway table’s succulents in his mouth.
“Mayo! I told you to stay there!” It almost felt like Derek was calling out to a pet he did not have.
“I did! I am eating.” The alien said casually, tearing off one last leaf from the succulent before placing it back under its grow lamp.
“Okay- You know what.” Derek moved to shut his bedroom door behind him all the way to make sure the alien would not find its way inside.
“Put your arms up like this.” Derek held both of his hands straight up in the air, the Mayo mimicked with curiosity and a head tilt.
Derek moved swiftly, getting up on his tippy toes to fit the oversized shirt onto the creature, who wiggled a bit in the struggle but ultimately submitted to having the garment forced upon their body.
Then Derek was at an impasse. He realized he had forgotten to account for the extra tail appendage the creature had chosen to maintain.
He debated several options before just deciding to turn back into his room to cut a hole in the back of the oil-stained shorts. It’s not like he was going to be wearing these again anyway.
“One more second. This time I’m serious. Don’t move.” Derek gave the creature a tiny glare to try to establish his seriousness. He didn’t want the alien to eat the rest of the only plants he had managed to keep alive in his apartment.
“Okay, dude.” The alien continued to grin blissfully unaware of any transgression it did. It had no idea it was impolite to eat another’s house plants, assuming it was alright to eat whenever, much like Derek had.
With haste, Derek moved to find his pair of scissors and cut a rough circle in the back of the old shorts that would allow for a tail to at least poke through. Within seconds, he was back out of his room. He was thankful to find that in his short absence, the creature had actually not moved an inch this time and was not eating another plant.
“Okay. Keep holding still while I help you put these on.” Derek held out the shorts, with another curious head tilt, the Mayo just allowed for the clothes to be put on.
It was awkward to say the least. But honestly, that wasn’t Derek's biggest concern at the moment. He was more focused on how cool to the touch the slime’s ‘skin’ was. He was nervous to touch the creature anyway, sort of worried that if his own skin lingered too long, it would get absorbed and dissolved as well.
However, after a bit of struggle, the Mayo was now fully clothed. It made Derek feel a lot better about housing the intergalactic being, now seeing it in familiar clothing.
“Okay. C’mon. Let’s go keep watching stuff.” Derek stretched as he stalked down the hallway, the slime right behind him.
Mayo chose to sit where it had been stationary over the last couple of hours, in the same spot on the couch. It was instantly enthralled by the videos on the TV once again. Meanwhile, Derek had grabbed a small notebook and sat in the armchair. He started writing things down about the creature he had discovered.
First of all, it was obviously not from anywhere on Earth. It had somehow transported or teleported itself into Derek’s apartment after a flash of green light. Definitely something he would have to question the being on whenever it got better at English.
Secondly, it was capable of speech and mimicking other organisms both visually and sound-wise. The extent to which it was able to study and replicate behaviors was still an unknown, which was probably the most terrifying part about the Mayo. Other than that, it was very docile and pretty much harmless, or so it seemed. It clearly didn’t have the intent to harm or take over the world at the current moment, which was something to be grateful for. Although Derek had no idea what the goals or purpose of rudely intruding on his living space were. Again, another question for when the creature had the means to answer it clearly.
Third, it was like most organisms, and it needed food. Or at least needed substance to absorb into itself and dissolve for energy. At least that’s what Derek assumed was happening when it attempted to ‘eat’ as humans do. It seems to have a preference for vegetation for its diet.
After scribbling down all the known information he had on the creature, he rested his head against the notebook. All he could wonder about now was what exactly had he just gotten himself into?