Chapter Text
"So you've been hanging out down… here a…" Zooble trailed off mid-sentence as they rounded the corner into the Aquarium.
There had… apparently been some renovations since the last time they'd been down here.
For starters, one of the benches had been moved. And duplicated a few times. Someone had built what was essentially a picnic table from scratch - one oversized bench stretched to table size, flanked on two sides by copies of the same bench.
The ad-hoc table itself was covered in entirely too many papers.
Caine and Kinger sat at one end of the table, taking turns pointing at diagrams and nattering about… something. Pomni, meanwhile, stood sentinel at the head of the table; she perked up visibly at Zooble's approach, skittering around the table to greet them.
"…I can barely keep up with them," she admitted as she got close enough to whisper.
"Keep up with them on what?" Zooble scratched the back of their triangle-head with a crablike claw. "You've been down here for hours. I was about to open up the bar."
"Kinger got Caine to explain a bit more about how our files work," the jester explained in a low voice, picking up one of the pieces of paper. The diagram on it looked like the world's most boring Christmas tree. "They're trying to puzzle out how Abstraction… you know… happens."
"Don't we… know how Abstraction happens?" Zooble offered, cautious. "I thought it was pretty straightforward."
Pomni gave Zooble a look somewhere between exasperated and acerbic. Several snarky quips cycled behind her eyes before she settled on something less aggressive.
"Nothing about this has been straightforward." The jester set the diagram back down on the table. "Caine barely understands how our files work. He barely understands how being human works-- did-- did you know he doesn't learn on his own?"
"What, he needs a tutor?" Zooble tilted their triangle to the side.
"No, I mean like… if he doesn't intentionally reprogram himself, he doesn't learn anything. He doesn't really have memories the same way we do. He just has logs - they're kinda just there. Every single thing he's ever learned-- big or small-- he had to code into himself by hand."
"That… sounds exhausting," Zooble admits, "but I don't really see how it's relevant to Abstracting."
Pomni gestures over at where Kinger and Caine are taking turns drawing on the whiteboard. "It meant Caine didn't really think about our files correctly. What he thought was 'us' were these little core files-- Kinger says they were made out of the brain scans-- but they're really more of… a map. A map that tells the circus where the bits that make us 'us' are. Like our memories. Apparently a lot of how we make decisions is built into how our memories are organized."
"…this sounds like my social work classes." The conversation between Kinger and Caine had died down, as Kinger consulted a binder and Caine hovered over his shoulder. The AI spared a glance in their direction, noticed Zooble, and excused himself to zip over.
Zooble took their chance, interjecting before Caine could say anything. "Is that why all those 'therapy sessions' never went anywhere and nothing ever changed?"
"I'm… not sure what you mean," he replied, taking his hat in his hands. Caine was trying not to preemptively wince; Zooble was by far the cast member who intimidated him the most.
"…nevermind. Forget it."
"Forget what?" Caine tilted his teeth, confused; Zooble just looked more frustrated. Pomni's gaze drifted between the two of them, sensing the agitation but not sure what to do.
"…wait." The AI lowered himself down to the deck, leaning on his cane. "I'm… I need you to trust me, for a second. Please." He reached over as if to take Zooble's hand-- but froze midair as their gaze soured, before letting the idea (and his hand) drop altogether. "What do you mean by 'therapy sessions'?"
For a split second, Zooble looked like they were ready to tear Caine's limbs off. The look they gave Pomni screamed incredulity.
The jester gave them a 'what do you have to lose?' shrug.
"…fine." Zooble took a few deep breaths, visibly deflating as they let the anger flow out of them. They turned to Caine as if cornering a kid pulling a prank. "Starting like… a few months after I got here. Every week or two you'd pull me aside and ask me 'what was on my mind' or 'what my problem was'. And I'd tell you. And you'd always steer the conversation towards something you'd already did, or back to your adventures, and I'd get frustrated, and I'd yell at you and stomp off. And nothing would change. Those 'therapy sessions'."
"…and would you get frustrated the same way you did just now?"
"Well yeah," they agreed, uncrossing their arms and leaning towards Caine. "Of course. It was like you were playing stupid or-- what, did you not consider it important enough to 'learn from' or whatever?"
"…no," Caine looked up at them, keeping his voice calm. "I didn't learn from them because you told me not to."
"You're fuckin-- No I didn't! When did I do that?!"
"Just now," he insisted, looking between Zooble and Pomni as if the jester would back him up. "You asked me a question, I gave you an answer you didn't like, and you told me 'nevermind' and to 'forget it.' Is that… not something you say often when you're frustrated?"
"…you're… you're not serious."
Caine just nodded. "It's an instruction. It's an instruction that's within my power to do, not against my programming, and was fully within your rights to give. 'Nevermind'. 'Forget it'. "
"…you are actually being serious right now." Zooble's triangle noggin may not have been great for emoting, but their voice certainly carried the extra weight. "How was I supposed to know you'd take that as an order?!"
"How was I supposed to know it wasn't?" Caine's voice stayed perfectly level, almost infuriatingly calm. "Where would we be if I assumed you didn't mean what you said, by default?"
"Do you just take everything we say literally..?"
"…you don't remember having to teach him about lying at the last D&D session?" Pomni interjected, leaning her head into Zooble's view.
Zooble just looked back and forth between Pomni and Caine, unsure what to do with their arms. It was getting real hard to fight down the urge to strangle Caine.
"I've always been on your side," the AI offered, voice soft. "All of you. My first goal has always been to make your stay here the best it can be. I don't go out of my way to deny you anything."
"Bullshit," Zooble countered, claw settling onto one hip. "What about the swearing? What about sex?"
"That's against my programming," he replied, wincing a bit just at the word 'sex.' "I was programmed to be 'family-friendly' for all ages."
"So why can we swear now?"
"It's still against my programming," Caine insisted. "I just don't have the power to enforce it anymore. I still can't do it myself, and I'm unable to think in that way, but I don't have the ability to stop you anymore."
"…can't you just program that out?" This time it was Pomni's turn to interject. "Being family-friendly, I mean."
Caine shook his teeth no. "I would need to think it was a good idea," he explained, "and that part of my code won't let me think it's a good idea to alter it."
The gears in Zooble's head were turning. "…that's not the only way. Is it."
"Whaaaaa'd'you mean?" Caine looked up at Zooble innocently.
"Caine." Zooble turned to face the AI, face inscrutable. "Program out the part of your 'family-friendly' filter that won't let you think it's a good idea to alter your 'family-friendly' filter."
"I--" Caine looked actually taken aback for a second. It's surprising how many emotions can flash across a set of well-animated teeth: confusion, concern, fear, guilt? Shame? Timidity?
Submission.
"…I can do that." His voice was soft, with an edge of something uncertain. Something neither Zooble nor Pomni could place.
Caine's eyes dilated for a few moments as he stared off into the middle distance, unfocused-- or, at least, unfocused on his sprite.
"Reinitializing." With that one word, Caine winked out of existence.
Zooble turned to Pomni, posture already lighter. "…think it worked?" Their hands were back on their hips, their eyes a little brighter.
Pomni meanwhile looked immensely uncomfortable.
"What?" Zooble blinked, twice.
"…you kinda…" the jester trailed off a bit, gesturing nervously with her hands. "…just ordered Caine to lobotomize himself. A little."
It took a few seconds for the truth of Pomni's words to hit Zooble.
"…oh."
"Shit."