Chapter Text
Stupid, stupid, STUPID! What were you thinking with that? I’m ruining my reputation one cut to the wrist at a time! Cut to the wrist? Did I actually just make a self-harm joke? That’s so insensitive! What is wrong with me? I don’t even have the justification to make that kinda joke! I don’t do it, so I can’t act like I do. There’s no way scratching counts…right? Surely not. I think a teen once told me it only counts if blood is drawn. And I don’t bleed. Never have. That means I’m clean. But the pencils…do they count? Or what about the scissors? They aren’t sharp by any means. Am I actually…
He cut himself off before finishing his thought, refusing to go any further within that rabbit hole. He pulled out a pen and started doodling on his arms. You’d expect it to be something small, like a planet. But no. Astro’s mind is a twisted little maze, leading his heart further and further from the light. His first drawing was that of a noose. Not in the usual hateful way, but in a more…self-hatred kind of way. His next drawing was a pill. He added a small cigarette next to it. Wisps of smoke swirled upwards. He moved on to his ankle. An eye. Then more. And more. Soon enough, he had a ring of eyes circling his ankle. He pulled his other leg up and drew a knife covered in blood.
Astro reached for an empty piece of paper on his nightstand, scribbling down a short message.
——————
Astro stepped out of his room, willing to apologize to Sprout. He quietly walked over to the kitchen, avoiding the gazes of any toons in the hallways. He stared at Cosmo and Sprout in the kitchen, laughing about some stupid inside joke.
“Absolutely not! What makes you think I’d ever try that?”
“I don’t know, Cosmo! You just seem like the kinda guy who’d…What are you doing here?” Sprout asked, hands on his hips.
“I’m just here to apologize.”
“Cosmo, handle the oven. Are you sure that’s what you want? You don’t wanna push my help away again?”
“Why would I possibly want that?”
“‘Cause you’ve certainly done this before. I wouldn’t be surprised if you’re just trying to use my kindness against me.”
“Why would that ever even be my intention!?”
“Hey, you can never trust anybody too much. I bet you’d know that better than anybody.”
“Who do you think you are!? Saying shit like that to my face? No wonder you hang out with Cosmo all the time! You can’t have a decent conversation with anybody else!”
Shit. Did I go too far?
“Oh yeah? Well at least my friend is real and not some lying, hypocritical cunt.”
Astro’s back hit the wall.
“Wha…What did you just- huh..?”
“...I said what I said. Maybe you deserve that after shit-talking my best friend.”
Astro balled up his fists. “Fuck this. I’m going back to my room. Find me if you need me.” He stormed off without another word.
“...You should probably fix that, Sprout.”
——————
Sprout knocked on the door. “Astro?” He asked, his arms crossed.
No response.
“I swear to god if you’re sleeping…”
Still nothing. He punched the door, trying to wake Astro up. Nothing. Now he was starting to get worried. The door had cracked open, a small stream of soft yellow light pouring into the cold, dark room.
Astro was laying on his side, his back to the doorway. He didn’t move.
“Uh- Astro? You…awake?” Sprout asked, confusion starting to seep into his voice. Astro nodded his head slightly. “Great. Can you look at me..?” Sprout asked, taking a step forward. Nothing. Sprout sat down on the edge of Astro’s bed, sinking into the soft mattress. “...Look. You can’t go dissing Cosmo like that. I really need him in my life. He makes me complete. Literally.”
Astro only bundled up tighter.
“…But, I do understand why you’d say that. I did cross a line too. I’m just here to say sorry.” Oh god. Sprout thought. Is he okay?
Astro’s body started to tremble. Sprout leaned over to put a hand on his shoulder, any for Astro to spring up and wrap his arms around Sprout. Heavy yet quiet sobs shook Astro’s body. He only gripped tighter. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry! I’ll never do that again! Please forgive me! I promise I’ll do anything!” Astro cried, his arms tightening around Sprout. “Alright, alright!” Sprout exclaimed, giggling. “I forgive you.”
“You do?”
“Of course. That’s what friends are for, right?”