Chapter Text
Sept.14, 1986
School has been alright, for me atleast. Jane is still having problems and Angela just won't quit. I hate that I'm too scared to speak up about it. I don't wanna be zombie boy again but I don't want Jane to go through this like I did. It hurts even more to watch them when I was the target. I feel like I've been to angry lately, well I don't think it shows. Nobody really notices anything anymore. But that's fine I'm happy they're finding a good change in Lenora. I just can't move on no matter how hard I try, it's frustrating just not knowing how to cope with anything when I don't know what's wrong with me. Maybe I'm just bummed cause I haven't gotten a letter back from Mike yet. It's totally unfair for me to upset though. Maybe he just hasn't got to it yet or it's still sending? I know neither of those are right, Jane gets one every week and it's been months. But I mean Jane's his girlfriend. His first priority. Maybe I just need to accept that I need to move on. But I just can't, these feelings rush over me like a tsunami, it wrecks any thoughts that try to even stop me from thinking about him. I've only heard from Dustin and Lucas a few times, they talked about their new DND club and how Lucas is thinking of joining basketball which is great for them, I just didn't think they could move on so quick. I only heard from Max once, which was surprising because I didn't think she would write me, we were never really close, it's a shame though max seems like a fun time from what Jane has told me. But max mostly just asked about Cali and if I needed I could write to her. It was very thoughtful of max to send that unexpected letter. It was more than Mike did. I miss h̶i̶m̶ them so much it hurts.